TL;DR: The guy I'm dating non-exclusively is still sleeping with his ex. I can't decide if this is a red flag or not. For the record, I have been the one insisting we keep things open.
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posted by krakenattack
on Feb 28, 2013 -
36 answers
Got a message out of the blue on a social network the other day from an ex; mentioned it to my partner (we're both big believers in transparency when it comes to random messages from exes) and we're each taking a different read from the message, so we figured we'd turn to the hivemind for input.
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posted by MarchHare
on Jan 10, 2013 -
60 answers
How do I get over the fact that people find my boyfriend unattractive, how can my boyfriend and I make our long-distance relationship more romantic and interesting, and how do I deal with/get over the fact that he knows people from my past that I wish I didn't ever have to run into?
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posted by lilacp
on Aug 10, 2012 -
43 answers
We dated for quite a while, but it didn't work out and we've ended up as good friends. But now I'm entering a serious relationship for the first time since it ended, and the shift in my attention seems to be rattling her. How can I handle this gracefully?
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 12, 2012 -
39 answers
Some twenty years ago, I fell pregnant and had an abortion. Now my former partner has contacted me wanting to know more details.
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 6, 2012 -
75 answers
Someone I dated years ago obsessively visits my blogs and leaves messages. The messages aren't threatening, but they're starting to annoy me. Can I do anything about it? Should I?
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posted by anonymous
on May 21, 2012 -
23 answers
He's not over his ex. I suppose I just have to go away and wait to see if he ever pursues me...
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posted by GIRLesq
on Feb 19, 2012 -
39 answers
I think I need to tell my ex-FWB that I can't hang out with him anymore. I do, right? How do I... do that?
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 29, 2011 -
15 answers
Should I tell my (potential) new boyfriend about my marriage and divorce? Or can I keep this secret like I want to?
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 28, 2011 -
53 answers
Help me understand my boyfriend's reaction to this relationship issue. While you're at it, help me figure out mine. I'm desperate.
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 13, 2011 -
34 answers
What would be a good poem/saying/verse for a little boy of 8 to read at the wedding of his dad? Mom is trying to help but is stumped.
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posted by momochan
on Aug 17, 2011 -
8 answers
My engaged, passive-aggressive ex continues to contact me, and I continue to let him. Help me cut him off for good.
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posted by anotheraccount
on Jul 1, 2011 -
38 answers
Why does my girlfriend still mention her ex-boyfriend and the life they shared together?
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posted by anonymous
on May 30, 2011 -
47 answers
Seven months ago I cheated on my partner. Six months ago I came clean to him. Three months ago we broke up. This past week we have begun to spend some time together, and I feel like we both reached a breakthrough last night. Am I crazy to have this renewed faith in/willingness to work for our love? Do I need to finally let it go? Much more inside.
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posted by fignewton
on Apr 21, 2011 -
23 answers
Practical advice for dealing with jealousy towards one particular person? Or, how does one move from love to friendship? Sorry, whole plate-o-beans inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 28, 2011 -
8 answers
Why won't my ex talk to me? And how can I be okay with this? Give me
insight based on your experience.
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 15, 2010 -
36 answers
I've recently reconnected with The Ex and am contemplating a discussion about getting back together with him. I'm looking for your stories about round 2 (or 3, 4, and beyond), how it worked or didn't work out for you.
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posted by patientpatient
on Nov 11, 2010 -
21 answers
At baseline, I'm terrible with keeping in touch even with uncomplicatedly good friends. This situation is far from uncomplicated, though.
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 9, 2010 -
21 answers
My girlfriend feels sorry for her ex. He contacts her several times per day, she replies because she feels sorry for him. I am paranoid... should I learn to relax?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 7, 2010 -
56 answers
Before my now-boyfriend and I decided to go exclusive, we had a long uncommitted period where we were just besties who had great sex. At the time, his other flings and involvements didn't bother me. Now that we're actually together, I am retrospectively jealous. Very jealous. How do I overcome my jealousy and lack of trust?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 25, 2010 -
13 answers
My ex-boyfriend is moving out of the state and things feel unresolved. I don't want to regret not expressing my thoughts, but am worried my unloading on him pre-move is unfair.
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 4, 2009 -
24 answers
Relationship Filter: I dated this guy for a month. We broke up a few weeks ago mainly because I am moving this summer. We have overlapping friends and hang out at the same places, which was fine until last week. He hooked up with a girl that I also know. Since we aren't together, I really don't care, but I think he does. Am I wrong not to be jealous?
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posted by xyla2000
on May 7, 2009 -
26 answers
I dumped my boyfriend about a year ago and even though things are amiable, I can't help but be annoyed by his new girlfriend. We haven't ever had a conversation, but for whatever reason, it boils my blood to see her all over Facebook, tagging him in photos and friend-ing all of our mutual friends. I don't think this is jealousy, but I'm not sure how to deal with my absolute annoyance. Is this normal behavior?
posted by patientpatient
on Feb 16, 2009 -
38 answers
Posted a question
here about my situation as it stood about 9 months ago and got some good feedback. My question now relates in some way to my previous question and how the situation has evolved.
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posted by DuckGirl
on Sep 8, 2008 -
12 answers
Last night my girlfriend became moderately upset with me because I didn't want to meet her ex-boyfriend. So what?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 28, 2008 -
30 answers
Help me figure out the intentions of an ex who briefly got back in touch with me and invited me for a visit. What was his agenda, if any?
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posted by gov_moonbeam
on Oct 8, 2007 -
18 answers
My girlfriend of four years broke up with me. We're stuck in the same small clique for a while. How do I manage to still see all of our mutual friends? Do I just give up on seeing "her" friends?
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posted by FuManchu
on Dec 3, 2006 -
21 answers
Relationship Etiquette Filter: I had forgotten that I still have a gift that an ex's mom gave to me several years ago. It supposedly had sentimental value, and I feel weird about keeping it. Will I offend by trying to return it? Oh boy, there's way
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posted by wejones
on Aug 16, 2006 -
43 answers
What is the formal etiquette on how to address an invitation to a divorced couple who are attending a wedding together?
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posted by TTNoelle
on Jul 26, 2006 -
14 answers
How do you ween yourself from fantasizing about an ex? I'm a twentysomething female who was in a long distance, long term (4+ years) relationship that recently went sour. Basically, the biggest problem had to do with sex (I still wanted my partner but he apparently lost interest in me physically). Now, I'm good when it comes to making a clean break in the manifested-social-interaction sense; I don't stalk or google exes or call them up randomly just to be "friends" or initiate contact ever after break ups. But in this case, I can't stop myself from wanting this person in my head. When I daydream/fantasize sexually, he is always my partner and everything is what I wished it had been but wasn't in the last month or so of our relationship. I would prefer it if people offered me constructive ways to stop doing this rather than telling me I should just accept it--it is painful for me and I just want to move on through and through, inside and out. Dating (rebounding to forget him) isn't really the answer either--I have made a well-thought-out decision to remain single for a while as I get myself together on my own terms. I'm hoping there's something besides just the whole "time heals all wounds" adage that can help me get through this.
posted by anonymous
on Nov 8, 2004 -
28 answers
Friendship with an Ex? (added wrinkle: 17 year age difference, and of course, more inside)
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posted by amberglow
on Oct 22, 2004 -
16 answers
