When using a shared laundry room if someone puts a basket with clothes and whatnot in front of the washer you are using do you have to let them have the next wash even if you are not finished with all of your laundry? What if your other loads are in the apartment and therefore not visible to the person? Is it even polite to set your basket down like that? What if there are very few washers? Or only one?
I googled all around to try and find a satisfactory answer to this but I am not finding it, so I am asking for a collection of opinions!
posted by missmle
on May 3, 2010 -
34 answers
How do I balance my waitlisting to a wonderful PhD program with not messing up my acceptance to a great PhD program?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 31, 2010 -
13 answers
EtiquetteFilter: A business partner's wife handed me a gift for my wife on my latest visit. Said business partner is from (and lives in) the Middle East, same goes for his wife. Their family background is muslim, though they are not really practicing it. I hardly know his wife (met her only twice) and both of them don't know my wife at all. What is the meaning of such a present? Should we give her a present in return? If so, should it be more or less costly than the one for my wife (they are wealthy, far more than I am).
posted by cronholio
on Mar 31, 2010 -
4 answers
I am in the midst of applications for professional positions in my field. Often the people doing the hiring will fly interview candidates out to their location for a day-long interview process, which includes meals with people on the search committee. How can I gracefully request that they accommodate my vegan diet?
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posted by Fui Non Sum
on Mar 22, 2010 -
10 answers
Pre-interview etiquette: I've received a schedule for a job interview, a good half hour of which is pegged for a practical exercise. I'm not sure what this would entail in the context of the job, and I would like a little more information about it. Is it acceptable to email the HR officer I've been corresponding with asking for a rough idea of what the exercise is? How can I phrase this without sounding like I'm asking for a cheat-sheet?
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posted by the cat's pyjamas
on Mar 11, 2010 -
6 answers
Dating Etiquette - gently letting a suitor know someone else has been picked instead of him, without burning the bridge.
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posted by lizbunny
on Mar 7, 2010 -
31 answers
How can I get my coworkers from compulsively using air freshener, as it gives me a terrible, go-home-early migraine? Asking nicely every day for the last week has been unsuccessful.
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posted by kella
on Mar 5, 2010 -
28 answers
How do I let people know there are birthday treats for me, from me, in the office kitchens without sounding like OMG ITS MY BIRFDAY PAY ME SOME ATTENTIONS?
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posted by ShadePlant
on Mar 5, 2010 -
27 answers
Wedding Invitation Etiquette - my husband and I are hosting and paying for my stepdaughter's wedding and she has just ordered the invitations without involving us in any way - shouldn't the invitations be sent from the hosts - her father and I? I'm not concerned about the style or cost but I thought we would have the honor of extending the invitations or at least reviewing the contents before they are sent out. Or am I being hopelessly old-fashioned? Thoughts?
posted by anonymous
on Mar 4, 2010 -
53 answers
As a result of my family, I've been a fairly mindful tipper for restaurants/bars/etc. involving service and have adjusted the percentage I tip based on what's considered the norm irrespective of quality of service (now, doubling tax which is close to 10% in CA and rounding up). I ran across
minimum wages for tipped employees as a result of an argument with a cheap tipper and discovered that in CA waitstaff is paid at least minimum wage ($8, and higher in SF) without tip credit. I've looked at previous AskMes about
dealing with bad tippers,
contextual tipping, and others.
Knowing that tipping in CA no longer goes toward maintaining basic wages, (based on size/# of staff, i.e. tip out), would it be socially acceptable to move toward a quality-based criteria for the value of the tip, and what would you consider an appropriate minimum assuming a properly run restaurant where employees are getting paid on-time and full salaries? Feel free to correct me if I've misunderstood anything.
posted by palionex
on Feb 28, 2010 -
43 answers
Is it polite and respectful to use a service person's name if thier job requires the use of a name tag?
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posted by dchrssyr
on Feb 24, 2010 -
83 answers
Is it rude to invite a vegan to a potluck where you can't guarantee there will be anything he'll eat? My flatmates and I are hosting a potluck dinner. I have no control over any of the dishes except my own, which is and must remain meat. None of the other guests are even vegetarian, and I suspect very few if any are used to cooking for vegans (e.g., no butter in the mashed potatoes). I would really like to see this person, but I cringe at the thought of bringing him to the proverbial groaning board and pointing out the one salad that hasn't been sprinkled with bacon bits. Help?
posted by d. z. wang
on Feb 19, 2010 -
58 answers
Things with my ballroom dance partner aren't working out. Should I dump him, and if so, how can I do it without getting a bad reputation in the community?
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posted by psycheslamp
on Jan 29, 2010 -
8 answers
I am looking to buy a home for the first time, and I have questions about working with real estate agents.
How much time should I expect a real estate agent to spend with me? Three days a week? Eight hours a day?
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posted by bleary
on Jan 29, 2010 -
25 answers
My husband's second cousin and her mother are very generously hosting a baby shower for me. How much would it be appropriate for me to spend on thank-you/hostess gifts for them? (My sister said the amount I was planning to spend was too much.) Does it matter if I give the presents before/after instead of during the shower? Any suggestions of a good grown mother/daughter gift? (One idea would be to get gift certificates for two manicures they could use together, although I generally don't like gift certificates.) In case it matters, this is in the San Francisco Bay area.
posted by espertus
on Jan 22, 2010 -
8 answers
Is it a bad thing to call oneself a "gringa" (if one is indeed a caucasian American female) when speaking with Latinos? (context inside)
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posted by amyms
on Jan 20, 2010 -
27 answers
How do I address a Greek Orthodox priest in a written communication? I'm a respectful non-believer.
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posted by lily_bart
on Dec 31, 2009 -
13 answers
My friend's two year old daughter passed away suddenly last January. I am planning to send flowers on the anniversary of her passing. But before doing so, I wanted to make sure this is an appropriate gesture to mark the day. If yes- should the flowers be lilies? What kind of lilies? If not lilies, what other flowers are appropriate?
If it matters, they live in another state, and I sent a donation to their designated charity on the child's birthday, along with a note.
thank you
posted by mrmarley
on Dec 27, 2009 -
47 answers
All my recently married friends said that most of their wedding drama came from their parents asking to invite friends. My parents have begun campaigning for a few of their friends to be invited. What's the correct response?
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posted by valadil
on Dec 4, 2009 -
42 answers
If someone contributed to the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change's work on climate change, for which the organization was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 2007, is this person a Nobel laureate? If not, what are they?
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posted by PercussivePaul
on Nov 26, 2009 -
10 answers
My boss is going to end a contract with one customer, although the customer would want to go on using our services. Boss's decision is because the service in question is not profitable enough anymore. I'm in charge of this contract and like the customer ie. all the people there who I work with. I think the feeling is mutual. These people also have some expertise and contacts I would like to maybe use some day. So how do I come out of this still being (business-) friends with them?
posted by gakiko
on Nov 25, 2009 -
12 answers
What's the best way to indicate a degree I've completed but haven't officially been awarded yet?
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posted by j-dawg
on Nov 19, 2009 -
23 answers
My baby shower was two months ago and I still haven't sent the thank you cards. My baby is now a month old. Can I send out the thank you cards and the birth announcements together, or is that horribly tacky?
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posted by logic vs love
on Nov 14, 2009 -
23 answers
I've just returned to college as a mature student and I'm doing really, really well (marks in the low to high 90s, for the most part). I'm proud of myself but I have no idea how to interact with my classmates who aren't doing as well without sounding like a complete jerk. I don't have experience with this! I could use some advice or etiquette. There have been some... incidents.
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posted by VioletU
on Oct 28, 2009 -
55 answers
EtiquetteFilter: Baby shower without the shower? Please help me find a tactful way to ask for gifts to be sent now even though actual shower/party won't take place until after the baby is born.
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posted by picklebird
on Oct 15, 2009 -
26 answers
How okay is it to comment that someone's answer to "Where are you from?" is inaccurate, or even a lie?
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posted by katybird
on Oct 10, 2009 -
93 answers
Is there a polite way to ask someone where they're from, if they have a foreign accent or ... I don't know how else to say this, look as if they might be from a different country (than the US)?
*winces* If you're someone who gets asked this a lot, does it annoy you? Is it more rude if the person is 2nd generation (or more)?
posted by desjardins
on Oct 10, 2009 -
106 answers
Newspaper delivery tipping etiquette? Are additional tips expected outside of the holiday season?
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posted by cadge
on Sep 27, 2009 -
11 answers
I'm a temp, and I know a couple of people are being gossipy about me behind my back. And they don't know I know. Should I call them on it?
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posted by anonymous
on Sep 15, 2009 -
38 answers
I have an internet etiquette question. If I reproduce someone else's drawing/vector/artists interpretation of a copyrighted image and then post my rendition to flikr or whatever, should I get permission from the original interpreter?
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posted by dogmom
on Sep 4, 2009 -
9 answers
New baby, new etiquette: A couple with a new baby (< 6 months) receive a wedding invitation addressed only to the couple. Is baby presumed invited (portable lapsitter)? Is baby presumed not invited (potentially noisy)? Is it variable (call and ask)?
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posted by xo
on Aug 26, 2009 -
80 answers
For better or worse, I am regarded as somewhat of an authority in a particular field (yes I have a blog about it). For this reason, I am getting requests for information about the subject matter from mainstream media journalists and writers. This is a new situation for me and I don't know how best to handle it.
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posted by anonymous
on Aug 26, 2009 -
32 answers