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I'm not Mrs Him!

I am not Mrs Myhusband'sfirstinitial Myhusband'slastname. I keep getting Christmas cards that suggest I am. Is there any way of nicely asking people not to do this that isn't rude or churlish? [more inside]
posted by raspberry-ripple on Dec 20, 2012 - 129 answers

How to put other night-time pedestrians at ease?

I walk to and from work down residential streets. It's dark, especially in Winter. Evidently I walk faster than most other pedestrians as I'm often passing them, not vice-versa. Is there a way to reassure these other pedestrians that I am not hurrying up behind them to rob/murder/kidnap them? [more inside]
posted by TangoCharlie on Dec 6, 2012 - 54 answers

I do have some pretty stationery...

Do I need to write a thank you for the interview note under these unique circumstances? [more inside]
posted by Jess the Mess on Dec 3, 2012 - 7 answers

Can I go to a sing-along concert of the Messiah and not sing along?

Can I go to a sing-along concert of Handel's Messiah and not sing along? [more inside]
posted by colfax on Nov 23, 2012 - 14 answers

Facebook Etiquette with in-laws in mind

I am British. I have recently acquired American in-laws. They are a traditionally Republican family. I, like many Europeans, consider the current iteration of the Republican Party has passed so far beyond the pale as to no longer be a rational organisation. So I saw a post-election graphic on Facebook I would normally have shared, but...I'm wondering how this new branch of family will perceive that. [more inside]
posted by glasseyes on Nov 16, 2012 - 46 answers

To send condolences or not?

My ex-boyfriend's dad just passed away. What, if anything, should I do? [more inside]
posted by csox on Nov 16, 2012 - 24 answers

Business etiquette landmines to avoid when making a sales pitch to Japanese business owners.

Business etiquette landmines to avoid when making a sales pitch to Japanese business owners. [more inside]
posted by 256 on Nov 14, 2012 - 7 answers

Share house shower etiquette? (In Japan)

I am a guy living in a co-ed sharehouse in Japan. I may have committed a faux pas, and would like to know proper sharehouse shower etiquette. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by Kamelot123 on Nov 14, 2012 - 18 answers

Writing a thank-you, with a side of hurricane sympathy?

I've got a thank-you note to write to a friend of my parents'-- already quite late, since the gift was given early last month. Difficulty: since then, the recipient's house was damaged fairly badly by Hurricane Sandy, and she's been struggling with the aftermath. I feel like her current rough situation warrants some sort of extra gesture or comment beyond the usual thank-you boilerplate, but what might that be? [more inside]
posted by Bardolph on Nov 9, 2012 - 8 answers

Call me maybe

You: a professor. I: student/applicant for your program. How do you feel about phone contact? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by kettleoffish on Nov 6, 2012 - 16 answers

Letitia Baldrige died for my sins

We are very, very late with our wedding thank-yous. Over a year. We know we are horrible people, okay? Now what? [more inside]
posted by Madamina on Nov 6, 2012 - 32 answers

Bad manners to go to a dinner with casual aquaintances when you have a cold?

It's 3pm now. Going to an event, a dinner, that starts at 6pm hopefully, but I have a cold. Might it turn out that I am unwelcome at the event if I go? Thing is, I know exactly who gave me the cold and don't really thank them for it. Is it bad etiquette to go to something like this if you have a cold? They are not friends or anything that I would otherwise be exposed to. [more inside]
posted by Nish ton on Nov 3, 2012 - 24 answers

Should I pick up other dogs' poop while walking my dogs?

Should I pick up other dogs' poop while walking my dogs? I pick up my own dogs' poop but I don't pick up other poops when I am on walks. Am I being clueless when I step over another dog's poop without picking it up? [more inside]
posted by dottiechang on Nov 1, 2012 - 35 answers

Is maintaining one's boundaries beyond the bounds of etiquette?

How does the etiquette concept that "The only thing ruder than rudeness is pointing out said rudeness" not imply letting oneself get walked all over? Help me understand this, if you would? [more inside]
posted by Someone Else's Story on Oct 27, 2012 - 21 answers

"I wouldn't miss it" won't work either...

Introvert needs help with social niceties at a funeral. [more inside]
posted by miaou on Oct 24, 2012 - 16 answers

Take the money and drive?

I've been asked to speak at a student group at my old college, which is about 100 miles away. They've offered to pay for my gas; should I accept, or would it be more charitable to decline?
posted by adverb on Oct 23, 2012 - 14 answers

hostess gift in a hurry

What's an appropriate hostess gift in this situation? [more inside]
posted by homodachi on Oct 21, 2012 - 10 answers

Another one rides the bus

What's the correct way to ride the bus and get off at a certain stop? [more inside]
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis on Oct 9, 2012 - 28 answers

Secretary job interview secrets?

I would like some help preparing for job interview. Are there any secretaries here that can please help me out? [more inside]
posted by Groundhog Week on Oct 1, 2012 - 10 answers

We'd like that gift NOW, please

Several months ago, for my partner's birthday, my MIL decided to gift us with an electric kettle. We were happy, because we had been planning to get one, and said as much to her. But then she couldn't find the "right one" (she's quite particular about aesthetics) and now the whole idea seems to have slipped off her radar. But the winter is approaching, we're making a lot of tea, and we would really really like to have that kettle. Do we remind her, buy it ourselves, or what? [more inside]
posted by gakiko on Sep 28, 2012 - 28 answers

my business ain't nobody's business

Help me write a funny, effective, non-shaming sign asking people to please not talk on their cellphones in the office restroom. [more inside]
posted by elizeh on Sep 27, 2012 - 27 answers

I'm not trying to buy your affection but here's some cash

I am visiting my boyfriend's family for Christmas. His parents and two of his younger brothers (still in school) will be there, and I've met each of them very briefly. They celebrate Christmas with gift exchanges, but I was thinking about giving them cash, partly because I feel I don't know them well, partly because I don't want to travel with lots of boxes, and partly because cash is a perfectly acceptable gift in my culture (for New Year's Day). I've asked my boyfriend and he seemed lukewarm, but not entirely against it. Is this an absolutely horrible idea? If it's not, what is a good amount that says I'm not stingy, but also also not trying to bribe them?
posted by ethidda on Sep 26, 2012 - 39 answers

How should I address wedding invitations to significant others of my friends?

How should I address wedding invitations to significant others of friends? [more inside]
posted by mai on Sep 25, 2012 - 14 answers

How do I thank a recruiter who didn't end up placing me?

I have been using a professional recruiter. If I end up taking a position that I didn't find through them, what the best way to thank/compensate them for their effort? [more inside]
posted by i am a sock puppeteer on Sep 25, 2012 - 9 answers

Help Me Cope With a Noisy Eater

I have about three weeks to come up with a game plan on how I'm going to deal with a noisy coworker's return to our shared desk space. What would you do? [more inside]
posted by These Birds of a Feather on Sep 25, 2012 - 18 answers

Wow, I've finally found something that was easier to do with the twins when they were toddlers.

Help me navigate the etiquette of my twin boys' upcoming birthday party. [more inside]
posted by terrierhead on Sep 24, 2012 - 19 answers

Mailman Etiquette

I order many things online and get lots of packages. I really like my mailman. Is there something nice I can do for him? [more inside]
posted by insectosaurus on Sep 20, 2012 - 13 answers

I eat fast, maybe too fast.

I eat very quickly. I enjoy my food well enough, but I seem to enjoy it at a rapid pace, which can be a bit awkward in company. Is there an easy mental realignment to eat slower? [more inside]
posted by jackbishop on Sep 19, 2012 - 23 answers

What does the couple who has everything register for?

We live in a tiny Manhattan apartment and have everything we need. What do we register for? [more inside]
posted by alicetiara on Sep 19, 2012 - 37 answers

Dear Ms. Wilson and Messrs. Smith, Willians, Jones, and Davis,

I need to address a formal letter to five recipients of different rank and gender at once. How? [more inside]
posted by Nameless on Sep 14, 2012 - 22 answers

I hear the espresso's really cheap in this joint

Paying for first dates: who should do it? [more inside]
posted by Miss T.Horn on Sep 13, 2012 - 86 answers

Southern U.S. use of "Miss [FirstName]" -- racial or class connotations?

Southern Naming Conventions: Is there a race or class component to the Southern U.S. use of "Miss [FirstName]" (when used by adults to refer to other adults)? Which groups use this, when, and what does it connote when employed between/among races or social classes? [more inside]
posted by jjjjjjjijjjjjjj on Sep 11, 2012 - 50 answers

Wedding Filter: How do you seat divorced parents at a wedding?

Wedding Filter: How do you seat divorced parents at a wedding? [more inside]
posted by wcmf on Sep 10, 2012 - 31 answers

More notice vs. more stress?

How do I time submitting my resignation, in order to best give my employer(s) time to prepare, without adding too much additional stress to a big upcoming project? [more inside]
posted by overeducated_alligator on Aug 29, 2012 - 2 answers

The ancient Chinese developed a pun-based system of message-coding...

A (white, American) friend's parents gave me a clock as a gift, which in China is really not done. This was clearly not malicious, so I'm not offended and my parents are getting over it, but I'm wondering whether there's any way to tell them not to give this particular gift to any other Chinese people they may know. The problem is that I don't know any way to broach the subject that wouldn't call attention to their faux pas, and it's entirely possible that they just don't know any other Chinese people, in which case I'd much rather avoid embarrassing them. Should I say anything, either to them or to my friend their son?
posted by anonymous on Aug 25, 2012 - 38 answers

Correcting without Lecturing

How do indicate your disapproval with a superior's action without lecturing? [more inside]
posted by Kurichina on Aug 21, 2012 - 10 answers

getting the real deal about colleges

As an international student (equivalent 'rising senior') in high school, how can I discern what a college or university is really like, past all the glossy paper? More questions, and details, within. [more inside]
posted by undue influence on Aug 20, 2012 - 14 answers

Help me network a little less awkwardly (what to do with my ham hands?)

I am in between jobs, just moved to a new market and have been advised my alma mater's career counselor to set up coffee dates with alums who are working at places that I am targeting. How can I go about doing this in a way that balances networking etiquette and making the most out of these meetings? [more inside]
posted by SpicyMustard on Aug 11, 2012 - 9 answers

Door holding etiquette - advanced level

Advanced door holding etiquette. I found this question and answer but it didn't address a variant that I'm always running into. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by natteringnabob on Aug 4, 2012 - 30 answers

Do I tip out at the end or with each drink?

When at a bar/pub, I default to tipping on each drink (cash is easy to remember this way, for me). When they hold a running tab, what is the appropriate etiquette when cashing out at the end of the night? [more inside]
posted by CrystalDave on Jul 30, 2012 - 12 answers

Is it rude not to prolong the small talk with my hair stylist?

Hair professionals of the world, would you find me rude if I took the opportunity to return to my reading once our intial, polite exhange of pleasantries is over?
posted by =^^= on Jul 27, 2012 - 10 answers

Help me craft a nicely worded invitation for a party!

I'm getting married - yay! I'm having a simply civil ceremony at the NYC wedding bureau and then plan to have a party a few days after. My dear me-fi'ers- What do you think is the best way to word an invite to a post-ceremony celebration? [more inside]
posted by carmenghia on Jul 26, 2012 - 12 answers

Keeping my chin up?

I’m going to be working with the (presumably unaware) friend of someone who sexually assaulted me in the past, and the perpetrator also has personal information on me that I’d rather not be made public. How should I interact with the friend personally and professionally? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 19, 2012 - 14 answers

Proper etiquette for an unsolicted merit raise

What is proper "thank you" etiquette when given an unsolicited raise based on merit? [more inside]
posted by Fezboy! on Jul 18, 2012 - 22 answers

What if Miss Manners had written a book on office relations?

I would like some recommendations for books on office etiquette, including things like dress, getting lunch with people, how introductions to superiors should be properly handled, dealing with my intern being sidetracked by someone else's request, etc. If it helps, I currently work in media, East Coast U.S. I work on the tech side, but I'm having to deal with this stuff a lot anyway, and it's all new to me coming out of mostly technical positions in the past.
posted by anonymous on Jul 16, 2012 - 5 answers

I Want my Clear Conscience Back

I owe a person money and want to pay her back. How should I go about it? [more inside]
posted by Fairchild on Jul 13, 2012 - 15 answers

Should I send another e-mail?

E-mail etiquette: I need to have an interview with my college's contact at my externship. The contact asked me to e-mail her in July. I e-mailed her 6 days ago but have not gotten a reply. How should I proceed? [more inside]
posted by OsoMeaty on Jul 11, 2012 - 9 answers

"Hi, great to see you, who are you?"

Which is best: asking an acquaintance "What's your name again?", hoping they don't notice you don't remember their name, or guessing their name and being wrong? [more inside]
posted by escabeche on Jul 10, 2012 - 35 answers

Asking for job advice for partner from future graduate advisor - etiquette?

I'm planning to ask for job advice on behalf of my partner, from my future graduate advisor, because my partner's interested in a job opening at my future graduate school. Totally acceptable / useful thing to do, or a horrible violation of academic etiquette? [more inside]
posted by pants on Jul 6, 2012 - 17 answers

have i been an unwitting dick for years?

I'm in the US. A few years ago, I was horrified to learn that almost everybody who stays in a hotel leaves a tip for the housekeeping staff on the pillow before they leave the hotel. I had no idea. Apologies if this has been covered on the green before, but my searches haven't produced anything yet. What are all of the service oriented positions that I am expected to tip? Are there others I might be missing? [more inside]
posted by pazazygeek on Jul 2, 2012 - 72 answers

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