Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with engagementring

Best way to sell diamond wedding ring?

MultiFaceted — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 20:01:13 -0800

What is the best, most profitable way to sell my wedding/engagement ring? I'm a little leery of eBay or Craigslist. I think I'm approaching the stage where I'm emotionally ready to sell my engagement/wedding ring (it is one piece). I've thought about having it made into a different piece of jewelry, but can't really think of anything that I want to wear (and therefore have it remind me of the whole nonsense) and I honestly don't think I want it around any more. I've already purchased a ring to represent my new phase of life, and there's only one diamond so it can't become earrings. I also have two sentimental necklaces from my parents that I always wear, and I don't need another one. Plus, the idea of paying off some debt is more attractive than sentimentality at this point.

The diamond is a little over .75 carat princess cut set on a flat cigar band of white gold. There is an anniversary band with channel set diamonds (they're small) soldered onto either side of the band to make the complete set (so, two identical anniversary bands total). I have the appraisal with all of the relevant details downstairs. I'm thinking we paid around $4000 or $5000 thousand for the whole thing (typing that makes me want to throw up a little 'cause I wound up using the settlement from my car wreck to pay off my own ring...fantastic, no?).

I'd like to get as much out of it as I can so I can pay off the debt that I was left with after the divorce. What's the best avenue to sell it? Independent jeweler? Some other source? I am OK with separating the diamond from the rest of the gold...whatever works. I just don't know who to approach or how to get the best deal. If eBay or Craigslist is the answer, how can I make sure I don't get scammed (I am willing to take a lower price to avoid the scammers)?

I live in Missouri, so I can get to St Louis, Memphis, or Little Rock, AR with relative ease. Any other questions, just ask and I'll answer in the thread.

Boys like shiny things too!

Diagonalize — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 11:00:29 -0800

What are some good engagement ring alternatives/equivalents for a man? The boyfriend and I (the girlfriend) were having a conversation about this the other day, and we concluded that the current engagement traditions are in need of a massive overhaul. In this day and age, proposals should be fair game for anyone who wants to get hitched, so what do you do about the ring?

I know engagement rings aren't mandatory, but sometimes you want something special you can flash at your family and friends to say, "Look! I'm engaged!" DeBeers tells us that guys should purchase expensive diamond rings for their beloveds, but what if she wants to propose? Or what if it's a gay couple? What if she just loves her ring and wants to reciprocate? I feel like a male engagement ring would just be interpreted as a wedding ring by most, so it doesn't seem like a good substitute, and I've seen watches listed as a potential equivalent, but what if he doesn't wear a watch? While I'm sure an iPhone or fancy TV would be much appreciated, it doesn't have quite the same romantic glitter of an engagement ring.

And if you're reading this, honey, relax. It's just a question.

Should I bring the engagement ring?

orville sash — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 10:39:54 -0800

I'm going to ask my girlfriend's parents for permission to marry her. Should I bring the engagement ring along? I'm not really worried about the process of asking. I figure I can just wing it. What I was wondering is: are you supposed to show them the ring itself, as a show of intent? or is just telling telling them enough?

Cool Toronto independent jewelery stores?

laroodles — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 08:04:52 -0800

In the market for a non-traditional engagement ring from an independent local jeweler based in Toronto. My SO and I are looking for a non-traditional engagement ring and have ruled out buying it online. So far we are looking at pink and yellow sapphire rings. I like art deco jewelery, or pieces that look vintage with a modern twist, and would like to support small independent local jewelers based out of Toronto.

So far my favorite place is Linda Penwarden. We have been and I'm in love with all of her jewelery, however my SO wants us to keep looking around to make sure we see everything before making the final decision.

Where are your favorite places, Mefites? Specifically ones similar to Linda Penwarden. NB: I have consulted this previous thread and this one.

I look forward to your responses!

Which ring adjuster for an engagement ring?

bibbit — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 11:45:55 -0800

I am now wearing a shiny new engagement ring (yay!), but it's sliding a bit more on my finger than I'm comfortable with (boo!). I suspect it's just because of the cold weather and so I don't want to get it resized yet (and besides, I have larger knuckles). I'm looking for opinions on what type of ring-size adjuster I should use until I determine whether this ring is the right size. Options listed inside. These are the different type of ring adjusters I've seen:

Full band style
Jeweler's universal ring adjuster
Ring reducer

I want one that won't pinch my finger, won't get caught on stuff (like when trying to stick my hand in my pocket) and won't beat up my ring. Anyone have experience with any of these?

How to reconcile with ebay and weddings

Anonymous — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 08:33:12 -0800

We bought my wedding ring on ebay; it was grossly misrepresented. What can we do? We purchased a 3 stone ring on ebay. The ring was described as having 1 genuine, natural sapphire (not diffusion or lab) and two genuine diamonds. This was nearly a month ago. The seller had all positive feedback and glowing reviews. Immediately after receiving the ring from the seller, I took the ring to a local jeweler to have it resized and appraised. I got the appraisal in the mail today which states all stones are synthetic. I never would have purchased the ring if I knew the stones were synthetic; as it was, we settled on the metal type in exchange for the setting design and stones, which we thought were real. I am not sure what recourse, if any, I have here. I've spent $100 to resize the ring and $35 for the appraisal. The most the seller could do is refund the initial cost of the ring (although their auction terms state they accept returns for misrepresentation only within 7 days of the auction close, I have no problem filing a dispute with paypal) but then we're out those extra costs. I am extremely peeved though as this is the ring we did our ceremony with and feel funny about replacing it. Should I ask for a partial refund? What would you all do?

Non-DeBeers Engagement Ring Options

NHlove — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 19:00:32 -0800

Can anyone help with non-DeBeers engagement ring options? (Specifically lab-created diamonds, non-DeBeers mined diamonds, and purple sapphires) So my amazing, but anti-DeBeers boyfriend and I are thinking about getting engaged. (Yay!) This is all very exciting, except we’re not sure what to do for a ring. We have been looking at a few non-DeBeers options and I’d love to hear some input from you all.

One thing we have been looking into is a lab-created white diamond. These are real diamonds, not synthetic or simulated stones. The problem is they are only available from a few places. We are wondering about what sizes these come in, how available they are (waiting lists?), cost comparison to natural stones, and quality. I would love to hear from someone who has actually bought one.

We are also interested in non-DeBeers mined diamonds. We have been able to find a few places that offer Canadian diamonds. Some of these mines are owned by DeBeers as well though. Where can we find diamonds that are not DeBeers?

I would also love a purple sapphire as a center stone. Another color just wouldn't do and it has already been proven that I am not a graceful enough person to wear stones as soft as amethyst. We have looked here so far but haven't been able to find much else. I am concerned about quality and getting the perfect purple color (more pink than an amethyst but more purple than a pink sapphire). Any more sources or advice would be helpful.

We have really looked into all the options (no ring, heirloom, estate, other colored stones, etc.) and would really appreciate if the conversation could focus on these three. Thank you so much for your help!

How can I avoid getting ripped off by a crappy jeweler?

lbo — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 10:17:08 -0800

What should I expect when getting an engagement ring repaired? One of the prongs on my four-prong solitaire engagement ring is bent (my fault...) and I'm nervous about taking it in for repair. I don't live anywhere near the jeweler that made the ring anymore and I'm not sure where to start as far as finding a jeweler I can trust. Before I start calling around, I'm also wondering what you think a reasonable price would be for a repair like this. The ring is 14K gold, so I don't imagine it should be as complicated to repair as it would be if the ring were platinum. I'd really appreciate any suggestions for jewelers in or around Salt Lake City or words of warning about what to expect. Thanks!

Like the one ring, but with less evil.

SNWidget — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 10:32:30 -0800

EngagementRingFilter: I'm coming upon that time in my life - I'm going to buy a ring and propose to my wonderful girlfriend. My problem is, though, that no matter how much I look up, and what I read, I still can't wrap my head around buying an actual ring. She wants something like this, but I can't see to find anything. Help! Issues: I'm looking for something within the next few months. She doesn't care if it's a real diamond or man-made, but no cubic zirconium. She does want a diamond, though, so recommendations for other stones aren't entirely helpful. She prefers the three stones as in the photos linked above, and no solitaires. The ring in the photos was purchased as Wal-Mart as an example of something she'd like. It doesn't have to match perfectly, though, just the general aesthetic.

The Quest: I've looked at various online websites, and nothing seems to match up. I feel like I'm going about this whole search wrong. I've been avoiding mall stores, because I was told that, but most of the local diamond dealers seem to be less than helpful. I'm in the Dallas/Fort Worth area, if that matters at all.

Question: Does anyone have any suggestions as to where to find something, either real or man-made in that style? My price range is somewhere under $3000, but I can go higher if I find something I absolutely love. Size of the stone isn't a big deal... I just feel completely out of my depth in finding this.

Thanks Hivemind - I've looked at past questions, but they all seemed to be not quite what I was looking for.

Any suggestions/advice/general recommendations for engagement ring shopping is much appreciated.

How much will it cost to get my rings rhodium dipped?

geeky — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 11:41:54 -0800

How much will it cost to get my rings rhodium dipped? And where should I go? I've had my engagement ring and wedding band (white gold) for a few years now and they're both losing their silver color. I'd like to get them professionally cleaned and re-dipped in rhodium. How much should I expect to pay (ballpark)?

Also, where should I go? Unfortunately both the jeweler we bought the rings from and my favorite local jeweler have moved / gone out of business. Will your average retail jewelry store do this sort of thing, or should I find a local business with a jeweler on site? Do they normally ship rings out for rhodium dipping?

Thanks! :)

It just has a certain ring to it.

messylissa — Thu, 15 May 2008 19:32:10 -0800

What would you call this style of engagement ring? And maybe, more importantly, can you tell who else actually makes them? My boyfriend and I are in the process of finding THE ring. I love the kind where the band sort-of twists around the stone (like in the above linked picture), so that the band ends on either side of the stone. I don't know what exactly that's called, so it's making the process incredibly laborious. I've waded through SO many pages online.

I have seen them more common with round stones, but I'm partial to the princess cut. I did see an amazing ring in EE Robbins in Seattle, but it was in a case of specially picked rings by one of their designers and I haven't been able to extract the actual designer through them via email.

Do you know what that style is called? Do you know of some secret collection with the perfect ring, just waiting for me to find it?

His budget is in the $1500 range.

Engagement Ethics Optimization: Estate Jewelry / MYOR

lalochezia — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 10:41:11 -0800

Buying an engagement ring. Advice wanted on a) Estate Jewelry: recommendations on how to buy & not get ripped off. b) Make-your-own-ring workshops: how to get a good used diamond. c) recommendations for both of the above in the LA / SoCal area. My sweetie wants a diamond ring for her engagement. I want to give her one. I would like to avoid Tifffany, Big Box stores and even (gasp) Blue Nile. I'd either like to make my own ring or buy her an unusual used one.

I'd like to either

i) Buy her Estate Jewelry: it's more unique, doesn't contribute significantly to the demand for new diamonds, and considering the value of diamonds drops precipitously after being used, should provide a good deal.

How do I get a good deal? How do I avoid being ripped off? Does anyone have any good recommendations from PERSONAL experience in Southern California with used/estate jewelry?

Alternatively

ii) There are workshops (in SF and NYC) where you can craft your own engagement ring with your own hands: they provide eco-gold and tuition and you provide the stone.
Does anyone know whether there is a similar person/organization who runs a workshop like this in SoCal? (google fails me on this count)? How would I go about buying a used diamond for this process?

I have seen the many questions on AskMe before, but none address the points above. Please: no all diamonds are evil spiels. No non-diamond gems. No new natural diamonds. If anyone can show me white synthetic diamonds that are indistinguishable from the natural stuff, go right ahead. I know her ring size and I know her taste: we've looked at rings together & have pictures of ones she likes.

I've made my peace with buying some compressed carbon. I just want to perform an optimization on the nature of the transaction to maximize my ethics within the framework of buying a Rock.

Romantic symbolism: conflict-free and on the cheap

kyleg — Sat, 05 Jan 2008 19:32:18 -0800

Help me find a quality, non-diamond engagement ring that wont plunge me deeper into debt. My fiancee and I have been engaged for long enough that it's getting annoying and pretty ridiculous that she doesn't have a ring yet. We are both aware of the sins of the diamond industry, but she likes the look of diamonds or light-colored gemstones.

We've been to jewelers in person to find out what styles we like, but their prices range from too much to completely insane, and there's too much focus on the hard-sell of the diamond. Where can we go to find what we're looking for, either in Chicago, NE Indiana, or online?

What we're looking for: emerald-cut stone, plain or engraved white gold band, antique style, pave halo around the stone (without using diamonds, which is seemingly impossible). But nothing too fancy. Is a custom setting our best option? Is there any way to do this on a tight budget?

Easing the Tension

comiddle — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 20:18:59 -0800

RingFilter: Tension set engagement ring. The diamond rocks! Unfortunately, in the literal sense of the word. The diamond in my fiancee's ring has started to rock slightly. It's loose. Should we be concerned? Is it normal for a tension set stone to have some wiggle room? The ring is 14k gold, if that matters.

Should I learn to keep my grubby fingers away and not make anything worse? (Yes)

She fucked a German dude, I'm selling her ring.

ThFullEffect — Tue, 10 Jul 2007 17:09:15 -0800

Where can I sell a used engagement ring and get back as much of the original cost as possible? So some of you may be familiar with my previous post about moving to DC (http://ask.metafilter.com/64801/Not-moving-to-DC-with-fiance-a-huge-mistake).

Well, that is no longer happening. In fact, I am completely through with my (now) ex because she cheated on me (several times) with some guy while she taught english in Thailand.

I have this beautiful engagement ring that she has been wearing for about a year, but is in great condition. I have the IGI certificate and the diamond, itself, is worth over $3,000.

How do I recoup my losses (at least monetarily)?

Also welcome: words of wisdom about getting overthings like this.

Buy it now, sucker!

thewittyname — Sat, 23 Apr 2005 12:58:00 -0800

What's some good advice to follow for purchasing engagement rings on eBay? My fiancee and I have had it with trying to find an engagement ring she likes at brick & mortar stores. However, we've found a good deal of possibilities on eBay. I'm naturally wary of spending thousands of dollars sight unseen. THerefore, I'm limiting myself to looking at vendors with exceptional feedback ratings (the powersellers) and a policy that allows for a no-quesitons-asked return within a certian number of days. What else should I be on the lookout for?

PS> I know that GIA or AGL ceritifcation would be great, but a lot of these jewlers don't offer them for engagement rings (but then again, neither did Mondera). How worried should I be about this? What are the alternatives?

PPS> Bonus points if anyone knows what a "GHI Certification" is.

Capital jewelry

thewittyname — Tue, 08 Mar 2005 14:18:10 -0800

I'm looking for recommendations for a reputable jeweler in the Washington DC area. I'm going to be buying an engagement ring, and I have a pretty good idea of what I want and how much I want to pay for it. I've looked around on-line, but I want to visit some real stores as well. I'd prefer to stay away from mall chains like Kay Jewelrs and the such, but I have no experience with buying jewelry of any kind. I'm worried about getting scammed, can anyone help?

Any recommendations (especially for shops in Montgomery County, Maryland) would be greatly appreciated.

Interfaith Marriage

taumeson — Wed, 26 May 2004 10:47:43 -0800

Thanks for all your help with the engagement ring question. I swear, on my MeFi account, it's not me...I'm just the reluctant best friend. Right...so I need some more ammo.

My friend is agnostic, his fiance is athiest...yet her family wants her to have a Jewish wedding...so much so, that they're again applying the pressure, and since she "feels" Jewish, even though she doesn't believe, she's going along with it. See, her parents won't go to a civil or catholic ceremony, and if they don't have a Jewish ceremony, there's going to be hell to pay. But, my friend's parents are staunch catholics, and while they would go to a Jewish wedding, they won't wear yarmulkes, and some of his family won't even attend.

My advice? Either insist on a dual ceremony, or just let her parents have their way, considering they're going to shell out the money. But on top of that engagement ring debacle, I'm afraid he's set too many precedents.

What the hell can my friend say to her parents to get them to lay off? If he puts his foot down, what can he expect from them? From her? Anybody marry into a domineering family? Anybody intermarry Catholics/Jewish?

We all know this is a downward spiral, and if he doesn't put his foot down, next it's going to be Hebrew school for the kids, etc. (oh yeah, they're also doing the "you're going to raise the kids Jewish, aren't you?" thing).

Oy Vey! If the parents just weren't involved, this entire engagement/wedding thing would be simple. Also!

1. My friend said 10,000 is more like three months salary. Jesus Christ.

2. He said it was scary how people were guessing ethnicity and location correctly. Bergen county, definitely...try to guess the town! It's actually pretty obvious.

3. He's a bit shocked by how many people suggest "run", but that's not only impractical, they've been dating for about half their lives.

What could my friend do to avoid being bullied by his fiancee's family?

taumeson — Mon, 24 May 2004 13:25:09 -0800

There's already been a question on AskMe about engagement ring advice, but I'm looking for something a little different. My buddy just spent $10,000 on an engagement ring because his fiance is feeling the pressure of being a brand new attorney in NYC and wanting to look the part. He didn't want to, but he did it anyway, cause her family was giving her the "If he loves you, he'd spend the money" spiel and it was really getting to her.

What could he have done at that point? She's a great girl, just a little prone to doing what her family wants her to do, so "RUN" isn't an appropriate response. Also, what is an appropriate price? $10,000 is about two months salary, but it seems extreme.

Google's not really any help....strangers who I've interacted with (ala MeFites) are significantly better than strangers I have not (ala some random webpage).