65, need to find home. Where to live next? [more inside]
We are getting an iPad for my 90 year old grandma. What are some good games or other apps? [more inside]
My father and step-father (both in their seventies) are nearing the end of their lives, and I want to give them books to read in the time they have left. I'm not looking for anything that's necessarily literally on the topic of death, nor anything religious or self-help-ish. I'm looking for books suitable for a person with limited ability to concentrate due to pain/fatigue, that run the gamut from pleasant & not inappropriate, to ones that will provoke reflection and help them come to terms with dying. Please help with your recommendations. [more inside]
This question - how to set up an iPad for an elderly relative - has been asked frequently before. I'll summarize what I learned from those threads and ask a few new questions related to new iOS 8 features and cases, keyboards, and styluses. [more inside]
My father is aging, with heart problems and developing dementia. I am generally a conscientious person, but I'm staring down the necessity of supporting him like the barrel of a gun. Special snowflake details inside. [more inside]
What to do for an elderly, sick, underweight dog who won't eat his prescription food? [more inside]
My mom (she's 71) continues to work a couple of part time jobs, both out of financial need and a determination to keep working. One of them has her standing on a concrete floor for fairly long periods a few times a week. I'm looking for advice on the best shoes that will keep her as comfortable as possible, ones I can buy online (preferably in Canada) and send to her. [more inside]
My 87 year old Mother likes to help in my office. She is healthy, but frail. Should I mention to clients that I don't want them coming in to see me when they are sick and that I would prefer they have a flu shot? Is there some sort of proper business etiquette for this? Thanks. I'm in casual California, if that helps.
Family members have gotten an Android tablet for my 97-year-old grandmother. Please suggest some ways to make the tablet as friendly and easy to use as possible for someone who has computer experience, but who can be pessimistic about learning new things and can get frustrated with people trying to teach her. We're particularly interested in tablet settings and also methods for instructing her in its use, but also open to hearing about tutorials or apps that might make her experience smoother. I'm overseas, so I'll be passing along ideas to my dad. [more inside]
I want to buy a few non-word-search puzzle games or books for a friend's grandmother, who is ESL and has age-related difficulties (needs large print, easy-level puzzles). I want to buy something and have it shipped, I don't want to print out puzzles, and nothing electronic format. [more inside]
My mother is 90-years-old and lives alone. We worry when she doesn't pick up for the phone or we haven't heard from her for a couple of days. She is actively-opposed to any sort of regular check-ins by phone or e-mail to us, and she also does not want to use any type of monitoring service for the elderly (such as Lifeline) She does, however, use e-mail and her computer on a daily basis. Is there any software I can install that would send out e-mail alerts to us when she has (or hasn't) used her computer in x amount of hours? I would, of course, ask her permission to do this, and I am fairly sure she would be okay with it. (Don't ask me what exactly the difference is between this and Lifeline, I think it has to do with the stigma of aging that a service like Lifeline implies, something she is quite sensitive about.)
As I approach my fifties and confront the reality that parts of my body are wearing out and will never be young and resilient again, I turn to the arts for deeper philosophical understanding of this aspect of the human condition that I am facing. I'd like recommendations of fictional treatments of physical aging which are realistic but compassionate. Guidelines and caveats behind the fold. [more inside]
YANMMD -- you are not my mother's doctor. But you probably can do a better job than her current one. Please help. [more inside]
My spouse's mother, a senior citizen, just learned this year that she has heart failure. She survived multiple heart surgeries recently, a harrowing process during which she said she never wants to go through that again. Great! We assumed this meant that she was seeing this as a wakeup call to change her eating/exercise habits and stress levels so that she could get healthier. Several weeks later, it turns out that she is going back to all the old habits that helped contribute to heart disease in the first place. Is there any hope for her changing her deeply-ingrained habits? If so, what can my spouse do from afar to help support mom? If there isn't any hope for her adjusting her lifestyle, then how can we learn to accept her choices and still give her the support she needs? [more inside]
How do the elderly process loss? [more inside]
My mother wants to give me her car so I can insure it for her - is this insurance fraud? [more inside]
Central Indiana - I need elder care help today! Please help us! [more inside]
I'm a social worker at a skilled nursing facility, and one of my residents has asked if we could start a book club. I'm trying to come up with a list of books that they can vote on to decide what we read first, and am looking for suggestions. [more inside]
My friend is faced with moving her mother to a 'Senior Living Home'. (Connecticut) A lot of factors led to this; tests and professional advice, safety concerns, Mom's reluctant consent etc. Daughter understands all this, and will be relieved by her Mom's move to full-time care, but at the same time feels devastated taking this action. Abandonment, loss of memory and communication...... While other family members have visited the location and are happy with it, we will be visiting soon for the first time. 1. What should we consider? Where can a consumer look for possible violations or complaints? 2. I never had to face this. How can I support her?
Looking for recommendations for a very easy to use boombox-type CD player for my elderly mother. [more inside]
What should I do about/for my elderly, possibly senile neighbor? I am concerned for her safety. Special snowflake details inside. [more inside]
My parents, who are in their early 80's, both have spinal stenosis, which means both have mobility issues. It's a bum leg that affects balance in one case; in the other, periodic bouts of numbness in one or both legs. Both parents have done stints in physical therapy, both are lax about exercising regularly and, as of the day before yesterday, both have now fallen on the brick floor of the indoor sun porch. To date, there's been no real injury, and I want to keep it that way. At the very least, I want to ensure that the risk of harm is minimized and no heads are cracked. Difficulty level: a floor that floods (and mold), a large house, and exhaustingly stubborn parents. [more inside]
It seems to be common knowledge that elderly people, or others who are subject to more falls, will sustain more fractures than the rest of the population, and will have increased morbidity as a result. What I am looking for is an authoritative journal article (abstract or title is fine), preferably from an orthopaedic publication, stating the above. [more inside]
People with aging parents (not newly retired, but also not ready for home care/retirement home): how are your parents getting food and transportation? [more inside]
Does activity level during the day elevate the risk of a fall later in the day for a Parkinsons patient? [more inside]
Should we make plans to drive several hours and stay in a hotel, after flying across the country with our young kids (who'll be ages 6.5 and 4.5) next Spring, so that they can meet my husband's elderly relatives, with whom he has always had very good relationships... that is, until his octogenarian Grandmother said something to him over the phone that caused my husband to suddenly have a strong negative/ambivalent reaction to the whole idea? [more inside]
I've written before about my elderly mom's dementia. This is less about her memory problems (and mine dealing with them) and more about a sticky financial situation she's in, thanks to my stepsister. You are not my lawyer, but legal advice would be welcome. Prepare for flurries, inside. [more inside]
So, my parents (in their 80s), like many older folks, lost internet connection when Microsoft shut down the former WebTV service in September. It was a perfect solution for them and it seems nothing has emerged to satisfactorily replace it, but we have special problems since they can only get dial-up in their rural US location, and cellular coverage is spotty and complicated. Plus I'm on a different continent (and not so good at that end of computer literacy anyway – especially since things work a bit differently where I am). Still, I'd like to know what replacement solutions people have come up with among those of you who have dealt with a similar problem, especially if you can't be on hand to address ongoing problems that might pop up. [more inside]
My mom, who recently sold her home and moved into senior housing, has expressed interest in owning some sort of computing device. She's basically computer illiterate, has never been on the internet, and has trouble using my TV remote control sometimes. Am I crazy to even consider getting her an iPad? [more inside]
My father has been using a plain old phone for decades. He's been somewhat visually impaired for a long time, but recently he started receiving an eye treatment in his one good eye that has reduced his vision even further. He also has low dexterity (though his mind's still totally sharp) due to a stroke earlier this year. He needs a new phone. Help! [more inside]
My mother is in assisted living, so she's inside much of the time, but has no control over the temperature of the building, and likes to walk outside when she can. She's asked me to find warm clothes for her to wear. I got her some fleece cardigans, but I'm having a hard time finding warm pants which are simple: pull on, no buttons or zippers. Difficulty level: petite, and not too expensive or fancy. She does have long johns, but simpler is probably better. Other suggestions of warming clothing are welcome, too.
My 80 year old mum is in palliative care in the hospital. She is physically failing but mentally still 100%. I would like to get her an MP3 player to let her easily listen to music and audiobooks. Difficulty level: must be EASY TO USE, must have BIG BUTTONS, must have a BIG SCREEN, and must ideally not be so expensive that if it went walkies it would be a disaster. I have an iPod Nano I could give her, but the screen and controls are very small, and I think she might have trouble working it.
My partner and I have been thinking about aging recently, as various relatives reach the phase of their lives where they're moving into nursing homes and retirement facilities. Our examples are mostly of people with children, but as most of our friends reach middle age without children, we were wondering: in the US, where we don't have ingrained cultural obligations or socialist structure, how do people go through older age without kids to take care of them? If you're in that group, what are your plans for your old age? [more inside]
My in-laws cannot live 120 miles from us on their own any longer. This is true. My mother-in-law is relatively healthy and 73 with all her mental faculties. My father in law is physically very healthy and 83 with dementia. Where do they live together? Snow flurry inside. [more inside]
I have an ageing relative who lives in Paris, France. He is highly functional and cognitively intact, but he has lost a lost of muscle mass in his legs and has fallen twice in the last year. How can I find a physiotherapist for the elderly in Paris? More beneath the fold. [more inside]
I need to purchase and configure a computer for my 95-year old grandmother so she can make Skype calls to her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She lives in another state, so hands on assistance is not possible. My 70-year old mother is going to set things up for me; I just need to get the hardware and configure the software. [more inside]
Hi hivemind. I'm in Northern California and stumped. I decked out my lovely, elderly parents' place, but foolishly bought stylish soft couches/chairs with no arm rests. I now need firm couches and sturdy chairs before either of them has a fall because of balance/knee issues. But when I google, I often find articles about how important the right furniture is, but one one site that offers a selection of furniture options for seniors. Or I find sites that seem to sell such furniture in bulk, to senior living facilities (and often don't list prices without starting a business account). I'm wondering if I'm just looking in the wrong place, and if so, where should I look? Or, have you bought great furniture for someone with limited mobility? Where did you look? What do you like? Thanks!
My mom is in great health and decent shape for a 70-year-old and just completed 3 weeks of travel where she showed great endurance. Then she came back and "flunked" a stress-test :( [more inside]
My 90 year old grandmother lives by herself in a house in which she needs to use stairs, but it's getting harder and harder these days. I know about electric lifts, but I recall a news story about a year or two ago in which a British teenage girl made a simple but brilliant invention: a track is posted on the wall above the stairs, and a large handle swings out perpendicular, and you grab onto the post/handle and pull yourself up or down the stairs. What is this invention and where can I get one online? Googling is hard because I can't think of what you'd call this...stair walker?
My dad is around 70 years old and has subsisted on a steady diet of shortbread cookies (those ones in the yellow box from the convenience store) and vanilla Ensure drinks for the past 2-3 years. How can we help him to help himself and eat real, nourishing food? [more inside]
My father (age 79) has gone from keeping a cane in the car for occasional use to steady himself (through 2012) to being in terrible pain and needing a walker around the house (the latter after a Synvisc injection to the knee 2 weeks ago, knee swelling, and falling - again - at home alone). So far he hasn't broken anything in his falls, but I live 90 minutes away from him and he lives alone. He's accustomed to being quite active and has often been mistaken for a man 10-15 years his junior. [more inside]
My dad is 78 and his body is breaking down due to a long bout with Parkinson's. He's been in a rehab facility for the last month and his time to stay there (that is covered by Medicare) is running out. He wants to go home, but he will need 24 hour care and I'm not sure that's a feasible option for many reasons I'd rather not go into (not the least of which is that "home" is a 4000 square foot loft with plenty of places to fall, which is a real danger with Parkinsons patients) He and I are not (nor have we ever been) particularly close, and I do not live in the area anymore, nor am I particularly inclined to go care for him myself (not that I would have the expertise anyway). I do want him to be somewhere that he can be cared for and comfortable, though. [more inside]
I'm in search of a personal medical alert product for my middle-aged mother and somewhat overwhelmed by the volume of incomplete solutions, vague descriptions, sketchy resellers, and keyword hoarding. Help me be the best geriatric technologist this side of sixty! [more inside]
Ubuntu for the elderly? [more inside]
My 90-year old, very hardy but recently frail, mother now has pneumonia. Has anyone been through this, or something similar? Do you have any advice to offer about the whole thing - what to watch out for in her, what to say or do for her, how to deal with the hospital staff, how to handle my own emotional ups and downs as well as those of my sisters? [more inside]
Looking for prepaid phone recommendations for an older person in the US. No smartphone, no texting, just very occasional outgoing voice calls. [more inside]
I'll try to stick to specifically relevant snowflake stuff here. So, my father is 78 and has Parkinson's, which is compounded by long-standing blood pressure issues that leaves him prone to falling unexpectedly (moreso than a typical Parkinsons patient). He lives in a big loft in the East Village (NYC) that he's lived in for forty years, and has no designs on leaving. [more inside]
My 72 year old dad just was prescribed oxygen. He has portable units and then an electric machine for home use. He is supposed to fly from Dallas to Phoenix to visit me for Thanksgiving. I saw the Southwest regulations for his portable, but should I rent him a home machine or can he check his? Are they heavy? Are they expensive to rent?
Need recommendations on adventure games for elderly people. [more inside]
Historically, what were stereotypical views of the elderly? [more inside]