205 posts tagged with elderly.
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Cell phone that doesn't act like cell phone (for dementia patient)

My 90-year-old aunt was just admitted to a nursing home, and they aren't set up to have landlines in individual rooms. For patients to have phones in their rooms, relatives need to provide cell phones. My aunt has some dementia. She still enjoys talking on the phone (and most of us live hundreds of miles away, so it's important), but she really is incapable of learning anything new. When I talk to her, she often won't remember something I said just five minutes before. More below. [more inside]
posted by FencingGal on Nov 27, 2015 - 14 answers

Around the Big Apple in 0.33 days (with a baby and 4 retirees)

My relatives are coming to visit the big apple and I would be chaperoning them around on a site-seeing tour. The problem is that they are elderly (are retired), from another culture & country (India), a group of 5 and there is a very young baby ( couple of months old) traveling with them. This makes using subways, or taking long walks or using bicycles a difficult proposition. What would be the best way to give them a good NYC experience? [more inside]
posted by TheLittlePrince on Nov 6, 2015 - 12 answers

Finding Assisted Living for my parents. What do I need to know?

My parents are in their early 80's. The time has come for them to sell their house and move to an assisted living type environment. This needs to happen sooner than later. If you have gone through this process what do you wish you had known before you started visiting places? What questions do we ask? What type of financial set-ups have you encountered? [more inside]
posted by Coffee Bean on Nov 3, 2015 - 15 answers

What are the risks for the elderly of sitting in a wheelchair?

Unfortunately my grandmother (85) suffered a stroke which left her left arm and leg paralyzed and required that she be in a nursing home. Although she initially could still walk, she now spends most of her day in bed. I would like to try to get her to sit in a wheelchair. The nursing home, however, is against this for reasons I'm not sure make sense. What can I do? [more inside]
posted by strekker on Oct 22, 2015 - 15 answers

Help me find retirement therapists/counselors

An elderly relative of mine is retiring within the next few years. Help me find a therapist/counselor to help them through this transition. [more inside]
posted by Ndwright on Sep 2, 2015 - 6 answers

Sending videos to the old folks at home

What device or electronic setup would enable an elderly, non-tech-savvy person to straightforwardly view photos and videos with a minimum of fuss? Difficulty: no wifi, no 4G, no DVD player, no ongoing tech-support access, nursing-home setting with mild theft issues. [more inside]
posted by Bardolph on Jul 13, 2015 - 9 answers

How can I be a good houseguest to someone with mild dementia?

At the end of the week I'll be staying overnight at the home of someone who is clearly exhibiting some early dementia symptoms. I've been incredibly lucky that no one in my family has ever had to deal with this before firsthand and I just want some tips so I don't accidentally be a jerk. [more inside]
posted by phunniemee on Jul 6, 2015 - 27 answers

Cell phone and computer for elderly, increasingly fuzzy relative

I'm travelling to help an elderly relative (in pain, sciatica, on pain meds) who is 83 and fuzzing mentally. She has been pretty good with computers for years, but is having trouble maintaining her PC. I thought an iPhone would be easier but she hasn't taken to it. So I'm looking for some kind of ultra simple phone (few features, big buttons, I doubt she'll text), and a replacement computer. [more inside]
posted by msalt on Jun 24, 2015 - 11 answers

Preventing elderly guests with poor vision from falling down stairs

My family has a summer house with a steep, poorly lit stairway to the basement. The top exits into the kitchen. There is a door that is normally kept closed at the top, and guests other than children rarely need to go down these stairs. So, what's the problem? Recently, a family friend with a similar setup had their elderly friend tumble down such stairs (presumably confusing it with the bathroom), and were badly injured and had to be rushed to the hospital. We have lots of elderly friends/family/neighbors that regularly come over. So... [more inside]
posted by Seeking Direction on Jun 21, 2015 - 23 answers

Help me remember this Y2K-era piece of technology!

Around 1999-2001 (maybe earlier or later) my grandfather ordered a "PC". It wasn't a computer in the traditional sense, but basically an Internet terminal. [more inside]
posted by GreatValhalla on Jun 17, 2015 - 19 answers

simplest possible interface for sharing photos with an elderly parent?

I'm looking to set up a way for my siblings and I to share photos with my elderly parents. My first thought was a shared flickr account - but I found that the interface had too many tiny clickable icons, and the photo thumbnails were also small. Parents are old, and have no built-in conception of the mouse as an input device, or tabs / folders / links / etc. as metaphors. But my dad successfully navigates the "smart" radio/cd changer in his 2015 model car, so I believe I can train him to wake up the computer, launch an app, and click on pictures. Parameters below... [more inside]
posted by meeotch on Jun 3, 2015 - 18 answers

Fence dispute -- did we do the right thing?

Our elderly neighbors were planning on fencing in 1300 square feet of common ground that adjoins our lot. They also wanted to put their fence about 4 feet over into our side yard. We gently tried talking to them about the potential encroachments twice. Unfortunately they were not open to moving their fence stakes even after we gave them our survey and the plat of our street showing the common ground. We had to eventually involve the neighborhood trustee in charge of fence approvals. Now they are absolutely furious about it. Did we do the right thing? How can we now deal with angry neighbors who yell at us from their car as they drive past our house? [more inside]
posted by Ostara on May 11, 2015 - 80 answers

Topics for Elderly Reminiscence Group

I am leading a reminiscence group at the skilled nursing facility where I work and am looking for topics for the residents to discuss. Participants in the group are generally pretty cognitively intact and were born between 1925 and 1935. So far we've talked about where they were born (what it was like at the time and how it's changed), favorite trips they've taken, memories about historic events during their lifetime (D-Day, President Kennedy shot, etc.), and favorite foods growing up, but I'm looking for more ideas about things to discuss. [more inside]
posted by odayoday on Apr 24, 2015 - 26 answers

Source for prescription kitteh food?

Kitteh is 17 and going strong, except that he's lost three pounds in the past several months. His vet has prescribed special food. I bought samples of two brands from the vet to see if he'd eat them and he likes them both (good kitty!) Now I need to find the best source to buy them from in bulk. [more inside]
posted by caryatid on Mar 6, 2015 - 8 answers

How do we take care of dad after mom's unexpected death?

My mother died unexpectedly last week at the age of 64, more than likely of a heart attack, and the whole family has been in shock and upset. She had some serious health issues that she neglected (both to treat and to tell us about) and it basically was the end of her. One of the biggest things she did was being the primary caretaker of our dad who will be 79 next month. So now we're left with trying to figure out what to do... [more inside]
posted by eatcake on Feb 25, 2015 - 20 answers

My mentally ill aunt is trying to manipulate my 95-year-old grandmother

My aunt, Anne, is being emotionally abusive to my 95-year old grandmother. Anne is also verbally abusive towards the nursing home staff. She has snuck an attorney into the nursing home in an attempt to get my grandmother to sign paperwork changing power of attorney. Fortunately the alarmed nursing home staff recognized what was going on and immediately called my other aunt, Kate, who has had power of attorney for the last 30 years. Kate rushed to the nursing home and stopped the process. That attorney dropped her as a client but she got another one. Now my aunt is apparently preparing to sue Kate, my dad (he's Kate and Anne's brother) as well as the nursing home. This is all occurring in the state of Texas. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 12, 2015 - 17 answers

Where to live next?

65, need to find home. Where to live next? [more inside]
posted by NorthCoastCafe on Jan 22, 2015 - 10 answers

iPad games for a 90 year old grandma

We are getting an iPad for my 90 year old grandma. What are some good games or other apps? [more inside]
posted by cmm on Jan 14, 2015 - 20 answers

What books should a dying person read?

My father and step-father (both in their seventies) are nearing the end of their lives, and I want to give them books to read in the time they have left. I'm not looking for anything that's necessarily literally on the topic of death, nor anything religious or self-help-ish. I'm looking for books suitable for a person with limited ability to concentrate due to pain/fatigue, that run the gamut from pleasant & not inappropriate, to ones that will provoke reflection and help them come to terms with dying. Please help with your recommendations. [more inside]
posted by Susan PG on Jan 6, 2015 - 23 answers

Pro tips for setting up iPad for elderly mom

This question - how to set up an iPad for an elderly relative - has been asked frequently before. I'll summarize what I learned from those threads and ask a few new questions related to new iOS 8 features and cases, keyboards, and styluses. [more inside]
posted by kovacs on Dec 20, 2014 - 11 answers

Should I avoid supporting my aging father?

My father is aging, with heart problems and developing dementia. I am generally a conscientious person, but I'm staring down the necessity of supporting him like the barrel of a gun. Special snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 13, 2014 - 39 answers

Feeding a sick elderly dog

What to do for an elderly, sick, underweight dog who won't eat his prescription food? [more inside]
posted by quiet coyote on Nov 12, 2014 - 15 answers

Best standing shoes for elderly mom?

My mom (she's 71) continues to work a couple of part time jobs, both out of financial need and a determination to keep working. One of them has her standing on a concrete floor for fairly long periods a few times a week. I'm looking for advice on the best shoes that will keep her as comfortable as possible, ones I can buy online (preferably in Canada) and send to her. [more inside]
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken on Nov 9, 2014 - 30 answers

Discourage clients who don't get a flu shot to protect my elderly Mother

My 87 year old Mother likes to help in my office. She is healthy, but frail. Should I mention to clients that I don't want them coming in to see me when they are sick and that I would prefer they have a flu shot? Is there some sort of proper business etiquette for this? Thanks. I'm in casual California, if that helps.
posted by mrhappy on Oct 28, 2014 - 32 answers

Make an Android tablet elder-friendly for my grandma

Family members have gotten an Android tablet for my 97-year-old grandmother. Please suggest some ways to make the tablet as friendly and easy to use as possible for someone who has computer experience, but who can be pessimistic about learning new things and can get frustrated with people trying to teach her. We're particularly interested in tablet settings and also methods for instructing her in its use, but also open to hearing about tutorials or apps that might make her experience smoother. I'm overseas, so I'll be passing along ideas to my dad. [more inside]
posted by theory on Oct 16, 2014 - 5 answers

Non-word search puzzles for ESL grandmother.

I want to buy a few non-word-search puzzle games or books for a friend's grandmother, who is ESL and has age-related difficulties (needs large print, easy-level puzzles). I want to buy something and have it shipped, I don't want to print out puzzles, and nothing electronic format. [more inside]
posted by anaelith on Oct 8, 2014 - 3 answers

Help me track my mother's computer usage

My mother is 90-years-old and lives alone. We worry when she doesn't pick up for the phone or we haven't heard from her for a couple of days. She is actively-opposed to any sort of regular check-ins by phone or e-mail to us, and she also does not want to use any type of monitoring service for the elderly (such as Lifeline) She does, however, use e-mail and her computer on a daily basis. Is there any software I can install that would send out e-mail alerts to us when she has (or hasn't) used her computer in x amount of hours? I would, of course, ask her permission to do this, and I am fairly sure she would be okay with it. (Don't ask me what exactly the difference is between this and Lifeline, I think it has to do with the stigma of aging that a service like Lifeline implies, something she is quite sensitive about.)
posted by nanook on Sep 21, 2014 - 26 answers

Aging in literature and film

As I approach my fifties and confront the reality that parts of my body are wearing out and will never be young and resilient again, I turn to the arts for deeper philosophical understanding of this aspect of the human condition that I am facing. I'd like recommendations of fictional treatments of physical aging which are realistic but compassionate. Guidelines and caveats behind the fold. [more inside]
posted by matildaben on Aug 13, 2014 - 25 answers

Mother's Little Helper

YANMMD -- you are not my mother's doctor. But you probably can do a better job than her current one. Please help. [more inside]
posted by SockPuppetOfShame on Aug 4, 2014 - 18 answers

Is there any hope that she will see heart surgery as a wakeup call?

My spouse's mother, a senior citizen, just learned this year that she has heart failure. She survived multiple heart surgeries recently, a harrowing process during which she said she never wants to go through that again. Great! We assumed this meant that she was seeing this as a wakeup call to change her eating/exercise habits and stress levels so that she could get healthier. Several weeks later, it turns out that she is going back to all the old habits that helped contribute to heart disease in the first place. Is there any hope for her changing her deeply-ingrained habits? If so, what can my spouse do from afar to help support mom? If there isn't any hope for her adjusting her lifestyle, then how can we learn to accept her choices and still give her the support she needs? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 31, 2014 - 22 answers

Grief and the elderly

How do the elderly process loss? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 31, 2014 - 16 answers

Car insurance for someone who doesn't drive

My mother wants to give me her car so I can insure it for her - is this insurance fraud? [more inside]
posted by chocolatepeanutbuttercup on Jun 10, 2014 - 17 answers

Please help us get my mom into memory care!

Central Indiana - I need elder care help today! Please help us! [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad on May 31, 2014 - 110 answers

Book Recs for Nursing Home Book Club

I'm a social worker at a skilled nursing facility, and one of my residents has asked if we could start a book club. I'm trying to come up with a list of books that they can vote on to decide what we read first, and am looking for suggestions. [more inside]
posted by odayoday on May 15, 2014 - 16 answers

Moving your parent to a Senior Living Home

My friend is faced with moving her mother to a 'Senior Living Home'. (Connecticut) A lot of factors led to this; tests and professional advice, safety concerns, Mom's reluctant consent etc. Daughter understands all this, and will be relieved by her Mom's move to full-time care, but at the same time feels devastated taking this action. Abandonment, loss of memory and communication...... While other family members have visited the location and are happy with it, we will be visiting soon for the first time. 1. What should we consider? Where can a consumer look for possible violations or complaints? 2. I never had to face this. How can I support her?
posted by ebesan on Mar 18, 2014 - 9 answers

Simple CD player for elderly mother

Looking for recommendations for a very easy to use boombox-type CD player for my elderly mother. [more inside]
posted by soundslikeobiwan on Mar 17, 2014 - 6 answers

Concerned about an elderly neighbor

What should I do about/for my elderly, possibly senile neighbor? I am concerned for her safety. Special snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 17, 2014 - 4 answers

How to Keep the Balance-Impaired Independent ... and Safe?

My parents, who are in their early 80's, both have spinal stenosis, which means both have mobility issues. It's a bum leg that affects balance in one case; in the other, periodic bouts of numbness in one or both legs. Both parents have done stints in physical therapy, both are lax about exercising regularly and, as of the day before yesterday, both have now fallen on the brick floor of the indoor sun porch. To date, there's been no real injury, and I want to keep it that way. At the very least, I want to ensure that the risk of harm is minimized and no heads are cracked. Difficulty level: a floor that floods (and mold), a large house, and exhaustingly stubborn parents. [more inside]
posted by Violet Blue on Mar 10, 2014 - 10 answers

Seeking journal article to state the obvious

It seems to be common knowledge that elderly people, or others who are subject to more falls, will sustain more fractures than the rest of the population, and will have increased morbidity as a result. What I am looking for is an authoritative journal article (abstract or title is fine), preferably from an orthopaedic publication, stating the above. [more inside]
posted by HoteDoge on Mar 7, 2014 - 6 answers

Aging Parent Filter: how do your folks get food and transportation?

People with aging parents (not newly retired, but also not ready for home care/retirement home): how are your parents getting food and transportation? [more inside]
posted by cranberryskies on Feb 28, 2014 - 21 answers

A hypothetical question about fall risk and Parkinsons

Does activity level during the day elevate the risk of a fall later in the day for a Parkinsons patient? [more inside]
posted by vincele on Feb 26, 2014 - 7 answers

Make a trip to see elderly relatives, even if she caused odd mini-drama?

Should we make plans to drive several hours and stay in a hotel, after flying across the country with our young kids (who'll be ages 6.5 and 4.5) next Spring, so that they can meet my husband's elderly relatives, with whom he has always had very good relationships... that is, until his octogenarian Grandmother said something to him over the phone that caused my husband to suddenly have a strong negative/ambivalent reaction to the whole idea? [more inside]
posted by hush on Dec 16, 2013 - 46 answers

Elderly mother's finances. Help.

I've written before about my elderly mom's dementia. This is less about her memory problems (and mine dealing with them) and more about a sticky financial situation she's in, thanks to my stepsister. You are not my lawyer, but legal advice would be welcome. Prepare for flurries, inside. [more inside]
posted by caryatid on Dec 6, 2013 - 6 answers

WebTV (AKA MSN TV) replacement? (with complications)

So, my parents (in their 80s), like many older folks, lost internet connection when Microsoft shut down the former WebTV service in September. It was a perfect solution for them and it seems nothing has emerged to satisfactorily replace it, but we have special problems since they can only get dial-up in their rural US location, and cellular coverage is spotty and complicated. Plus I'm on a different continent (and not so good at that end of computer literacy anyway – especially since things work a bit differently where I am). Still, I'd like to know what replacement solutions people have come up with among those of you who have dealt with a similar problem, especially if you can't be on hand to address ongoing problems that might pop up. [more inside]
posted by taz on Dec 5, 2013 - 9 answers

Tell me about your experience buying an iPad for an elderly person

My mom, who recently sold her home and moved into senior housing, has expressed interest in owning some sort of computing device. She's basically computer illiterate, has never been on the internet, and has trouble using my TV remote control sometimes. Am I crazy to even consider getting her an iPad? [more inside]
posted by bondcliff on Dec 2, 2013 - 35 answers

Help me find a big-button phone for my elderly father

My father has been using a plain old phone for decades. He's been somewhat visually impaired for a long time, but recently he started receiving an eye treatment in his one good eye that has reduced his vision even further. He also has low dexterity (though his mind's still totally sharp) due to a stroke earlier this year. He needs a new phone. Help! [more inside]
posted by limeonaire on Nov 21, 2013 - 7 answers

Warm clothes for an older lady

My mother is in assisted living, so she's inside much of the time, but has no control over the temperature of the building, and likes to walk outside when she can. She's asked me to find warm clothes for her to wear. I got her some fleece cardigans, but I'm having a hard time finding warm pants which are simple: pull on, no buttons or zippers. Difficulty level: petite, and not too expensive or fancy. She does have long johns, but simpler is probably better. Other suggestions of warming clothing are welcome, too.
posted by Riverine on Oct 20, 2013 - 23 answers

MP3 Player For Hospitalized Mum!

My 80 year old mum is in palliative care in the hospital. She is physically failing but mentally still 100%. I would like to get her an MP3 player to let her easily listen to music and audiobooks. Difficulty level: must be EASY TO USE, must have BIG BUTTONS, must have a BIG SCREEN, and must ideally not be so expensive that if it went walkies it would be a disaster. I have an iPod Nano I could give her, but the screen and controls are very small, and I think she might have trouble working it.
posted by biscotti on Oct 12, 2013 - 17 answers

How do childless people deal with the challenges of aging?

My partner and I have been thinking about aging recently, as various relatives reach the phase of their lives where they're moving into nursing homes and retirement facilities. Our examples are mostly of people with children, but as most of our friends reach middle age without children, we were wondering: in the US, where we don't have ingrained cultural obligations or socialist structure, how do people go through older age without kids to take care of them? If you're in that group, what are your plans for your old age? [more inside]
posted by linettasky on Oct 7, 2013 - 30 answers

Elderly parents filter: One healthy, one not so much

My in-laws cannot live 120 miles from us on their own any longer. This is true. My mother-in-law is relatively healthy and 73 with all her mental faculties. My father in law is physically very healthy and 83 with dementia. Where do they live together? Snow flurry inside. [more inside]
posted by Sophie1 on Sep 11, 2013 - 6 answers

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