Weight control/fitness rut

I_Love_Bananas — Sat, 22 Apr 2006 09:03:42 -0800

Struggling with a weight control/fitness rut (and more). Beginning in May 2004, I was the poster girl for Weight Watchers and lost 90 pounds. I did this in just over one year, helped along by the strong fitness program I began.

I had awesome willpower and started running, which I still do. I have upped my “amount I can run before I keel over” from 3 miles to 6. I try to weight train at least twice a week.

Once I reached my goal weight, I maintained it (pretty easily) for 6 weeks to qualify for WW “Lifetime” status. I was everyone’s go-to person for fitness and weight loss tips. I am 5’5 and was a size 8 at 155 lbs.

Six months later, I was up 15 pounds. Currently I am close to 20 pounds over. Because of my body type (muscular legs, overall even distribution of weight) it really doesn’t look like I’m that different. But I can tell- that the clothes I wore last year are too small.

What worked before isn’t working anymore, so I have been struggling with the motivation to keep working out. I know myself and if I stop exercising, I will balloon faster than Janet Jackson. I feel like a failure; aimless and like I no longer know what I need to do to stay fit.

I was always fat and I don’t want to be fat. I just turned 40. I hate that every day becomes a “me against food” battle. I want food to simply be food, not my uber-adversary.

I actually consulted with 2 different plastic surgeons but the tummy tuck and lipo I want cost way too much. Instead I took (much less) money and joined a personal trainer program to get a Harvey Walden-type dude to scream me back into shape. We meet next week.

My days usually go well and then I get home and deprivation sets in. I binge and yes, purge. I have been a “functioning bulimic” for the past 8 months. I thought I’d left that behavior behind in my past but it’s back. NO one in my family knows. I have it down to a science. I don’t do it every day but too often for my happiness.

I hope the trainer program shakes me out of my rut. There are days when I wonder why it’s worth it. Does anyone have any help for me in shaking the food obsession and breaking free of the cycle?

First post BTW, hello to all you awesome MeFites.

What do I do about my food-addicted boyfriend?

Anonymous — Fri, 16 Dec 2005 20:55:00 -0800

My boyfriend of three years has an eating disorder. It's getting worse, and I need help (advice, emotional support, AskMeFi words of wisdom). About a year and a half ago, he broke down and told me all about it. How he is a compulsive overeater, how when our relationship went through a long-distance period and I was living a few hundred miles away he would go to three different restaurants for three different meals before going out to eat with friends, or he'd get a few frozen pizzas and eat them all at home, all the while lying and telling me he had "a burrito" or something normal for dinner. We had a long heart to heart about it at that point, and I expressed how hurt and upset I was that he had been lying to me, but I would try to be supportive and understanding, with the caveat that he never keep things from me again. I promised not to judge him, in exchange for his promise that he would be open with me about it and work on it.

Since then we've moved in together and been living together for over a year. He started going to Weight Watchers meetings earlier this year and lost over 50 pounds. He took a little bit of a slide when he lost his job a month ago and stopped going to the meetings for a few weeks and gained a few pounds back, but it didn't seem like a huge deal.

Last night I stumbled on his bank statement, accidentally thinking it was mine (we have the same bank). When I saw three consecutive McDonald's charges, I got curious. I'm vegetarian, and was vegan when we began dating. I made it clear from the get go that I have no interest in dating someone who eats meat, and we don't live a "fast food" lifestyle. I don't eat fast food, and I despise it. His whole bank statement was full of charges at KFC, Carl's Jr., JITB, McDonalds. Keep in mind, this is a guy who couldn't afford to pay his bills this month, has maxed out credit cards, and sold some of his guitar equipment to take me out for my birthday last month. There are hundreds of dollars in fast food charges on his statement.

Of course I freaked out. I freaked out a lot, I yelled, screamed, sobbed, called my best friend, and took a bath. Luckily he wasn't home at the time and I had a chance to get my wits about me before sitting down to a calm, rational talk. He agreed to go to therapy weekly (he was previously really resistant), agreed to go back to Weight Watchers and stick with it, and we worked out a few others things that may help. At this point, I'm just taking a "wait and see" kind of stance. What I really need is advice from people who've dealt with this, mental health professionals, words of wisdom that can help me get over the hurt and frustration of being lied to. Is it possible for someone who's been doing this to themselves and lying about it for the last 15 years to beat an eating disorder? What can I do to help myself, other than seeing a therapist?

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Weight control/fitness rut

What do I do about my food-addicted boyfriend?