Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with eHarmony

Moved too fast, how to slow it down?

Anonymous — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 07:06:43 -0800

We met on eHarmony but live long distance from each other. After a few weeks of great emails and phone calls, we travelled to the same city to meet in person, had a wonderful time and had sex. I was overwhelmed with what had happened, am not used to sex without commitment, and when I got home got carried away and emailed him to say I had decided to stop communicating with other men on eHarmony. He emailed back to say he appreciated that and that he had a wonderful time with me but he didn't say he would stop communicating with other women. And yes, I do think it's far, far too soon to expect that.

Now in the light of day, I feel like I have moved too fast and would like to take back what I said about not communicating with other men, mostly because I feel like it would be better for my emotional stability not to put all my eggs in one basket quite yet, and because I also find some of my other matches interesting. Can I do this and if so what should I say to him? We are supposed to meet again in about 3 weeks.

I anticipate a pile-on telling me that I only said I would stop communicating with others in the hope that he would say the same and that I was playing games. I swear at the time I didn't consciously see it that way but in retrospect it may be partially true. I would very much prefer answers that didn't castigate me for what I have already done but that helped me move in a positive direction in the future given that I have obviously made a mistake. Thank you.

Your Experiences with Online Dating Services?

WCityMike — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 14:26:19 -0800

Have you used Chemistry.Com? eHarmony? Match? Etc.? I recently signed up for six months on Chemistry -- so I will be giving it that much time.

But I'm curious as to whether Mefites liked their time on it (or Match or eHarmony or fill in the blank). Basically, I'm curious to see if a consensus is going to form as to whether any particular service is particularly good or particularly bad, for the purposes of either sticking with them or moving on once my subscription runs out.

I do understand offline dating exists [obviously ;-)], but my question here is solely for people's experiences with online dating services.

Could you also in your response (if not obvious from your handle) advise me of your age group and gender, since that criteria makes a difference with such services? Thanks.

P.S. Any chance of MeFiMatch, Matt?

Why does eHarmony think I am destined for a life of loneliness?

thebrokenmuse — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 22:01:26 -0800

Why does eHarmony think I am destined for a life of loneliness? I saw the ad for the free personality test on eHarmony, and as a complete addict of internet personality quizzes I just couldn't resist. At the end, along with my results, they told me that they thought it was only fair to let me know early that I was part of the 3% of the population that they couldn't help with their dating services.

What!? Does anyone who works for eHarmony (or just happens to know) have any idea what I could have said during this quiz that would put me in this category? Why do they think I am destined for loneliness?