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673 posts tagged with divorce.
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Books for kids about divorce

My friend is getting a divorce, and doesn't know how to talk to her two young daughters (3 and 4) about it. Are there any books that have helped others in a similar situation? [more inside]
posted by odayoday on Jul 13, 2013 - 7 answers

What to expect in an Australian Family Law Court?

What can my SIL expect when going to a custody hearing in a South Australian court? Not seeking legal advice as she has a really good lawyer so much as an idea of what will happen procedure wise. [more inside]
posted by wwax on Jul 7, 2013 - 5 answers

Friend just gave birth. Leaving her husband. What does she need to know?

Not the happiest circumstances to bring a new child into this world. After years of supporting her husband, financially and emotionally, she's reached her limit. He's dealing with some addiction issues, and has become increasingly hostile with the birth of this baby. Maybe they'll work this out one day, but right now she doesn't feel safe, has filled her car with personal belongings and is staying with family. She left him a lengthy note, but does not want to talk to him in the next few days. This has been a long time coming, and while I don't imagine it will be a surprise—his family has actually encouraged her to do this—he won't react well. What sort of legal precautions should she begin taking? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 29, 2013 - 19 answers

When do you know a marriage therapist isn't right for you?

What are reliable questions that a person in marriage therapy can ask to determine that they are probably not with the right marriage therapist and should try someone else? Put another way, how can a person in marriage therapy know that the match with the therapist is a bad fit, as opposed to the problem being with the patient himself/herself? [more inside]
posted by scunning on Jun 25, 2013 - 14 answers

Car insurance and the marriage discount

My ex-husband is still listed as my spouse on my car insurance policy and I just recently found that it's been giving me a discount on my premium for the last two years that we've been divorced. If I send the insurance company my divorce decree, it will remove him from my policy and increase my premium by $100. I'd like to keep him on the policy and continue to get the discount. What penalties (if any) would occur if I did this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 19, 2013 - 28 answers

divorce mediation advice sought

I have a one day mediation set for next week. I have a great attorney and the chosen mediator seems a great choice. What do you wish you'd known, asked for, given in on? All suggestions are welcome. It's been fairly amicable thus far, but the money is causing strife. I'm in Washington, so 50/50 is typical. I was a stay at home mom for 18 years. Separated two years, went back to work as a temp. Kids are over 18, college is paid for already.
posted by jennstra on Jun 17, 2013 - 22 answers

I need to end it. Please help me find the words.

The short version of how I got here – love my husband but fell in love with someone else. It’s not fair to him but I just don’t know how to say what I need to say. (Much) longer version inside. [more inside]
posted by outoftime on Jun 10, 2013 - 53 answers

Experiencing sexual dysfunction and other symptoms, post-divorce

Went through extreme anxiety and upheaval 2 years ago and have experienced sexual dysfunction and prostatitis-like symptoms ever since. How can I approach this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 5, 2013 - 7 answers

"I'm not going to change"

The other day I had already had a bad day when my husband made an insensitive and crappy remark about something. I replied with tears in my eyes and said that he really had no idea about [subject]. Husband ignored that and then 5 minutes later cheerfully asked if I wanted to watch tv. I said no. He was surprised that I was "still mad" and we tried to talk about it, but I shut down because I felt vulnerable and remembered past talkings where I always felt like "too sensitive" and nothing would change anyway. This time, my husband apparently also thought the same because he said "Well, if you're unhappy, maybe you don't want to continue this relationship, because I'm not going to change". [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 30, 2013 - 40 answers

Marriage counselor / mediator in Seattle

We need someone to walk us through a separation in Seattle. There may be some legal and financial things to hash out as well. No idea how to do this. writingcrush at gmail for private messages.
posted by anonymous on May 29, 2013 - 1 answer

How do I cope with the loss of my first love after 8 months of marriage?

I dated my first love for 2-1/2 years and then we got married. She was my first girlfriend and I was her first boyfriend. She asked for a divorce about a month ago. How do I cope? Please see the extended explanation for specific questions. [more inside]
posted by speedoavenger on May 27, 2013 - 22 answers

Child therapist in Boston area?

My husband of sixteen years and I are going through an amicable divorce. Our six-year old son seemed to be dealing with it very well for the past year but now we're about to sell the family home he seems to have broken down, resorting to mild self-harm and not eating, saying he hates himself because he is stupid. The school psychologist has suggested he might benefit from seeing a therapist. Can you recommend someone great, ideally in Somerville or Cambridge? Throwaway email: childtherapistrecs@gmail.com
posted by anonymous on May 24, 2013 - 4 answers

How did you handle lonely nights after your divorce?

My days are full, though sometimes full of heart-ache. At night, once the pets and child are asleep, I am alone. Going out is not an option, and sometimes books, music and movies just aren't going to cut it. Did anyone find something surprising or helpful to them after a breakup that might help me get more comfortable with my alone time?
posted by SarahBellum on May 17, 2013 - 18 answers

Is this where I communicate with him, or give him space?

The guy I've been dating is pulling away, and I need some help wading through the conflicting 'wisdom'. [more inside]
posted by Salamander on May 14, 2013 - 29 answers

Have you had to divorce your best friend?

My husband of 8 years and I have come to an impasse: he wants a free-love, open relationship because he stifled his sexuality as a religious person before we were married, and I want...well, not that. How do I move forward when it means breaking the most important bond I have? [more inside]
posted by SarahBellum on May 7, 2013 - 28 answers

I need a good plan for covering living expenses while alimony decreases

Looking for some general advice on my financial situation. I'm contemplating hiring a financial planner, but they're $500 for two hours worth of work. I don't think my stuff is that complicated. I'm coming out of a nasty divorce, and count myself fortunate that I don't have debt to my eyeballs. Nevertheless, I want to make the best of what I have. So I'm looking for advice on where to throw money, where to take money, etc. [more inside]
posted by punocchio on Apr 25, 2013 - 9 answers

PA divorce with no lawyer = Confusion

I'm in the process of filing an uncontested, no-fault divorce from my husband. We just want to get the necessary paperwork over with as soon as possible and sign on the dotted line. Details inside, kept short and succinct for your viewing ease! [more inside]
posted by assasinatdbeauty on Apr 17, 2013 - 5 answers

Tips to keep emotionally in shape during conjugal crises

What are the things that you did during a conjugal crises that helped you? [more inside]
posted by TheGoodBlood on Apr 9, 2013 - 4 answers

How to know if I want to stay in my marriage?

My wife and I are having a lot of problems in our marriage, have been for quite some time. Infidelity on both sides. Unresolved childhood trauma. Lack of trust and honesty from both parties. We have a wonderful life and two amazing children and are best friends, have been since high school. We're both starting therapy (separately) and then maybe marriage counseling. And I suppose this is one of those things that I can expect or hope to work out in therapy? But right now, how do I know if I should stay in my marriage? What signs did you have that your marriage was over or was salvageable?
posted by anonymous on Apr 9, 2013 - 13 answers

Tell me how you survived the end of a long relationship.

Last summer I left an emotionally abusive long-term relationship, and I’m still really struggling with loneliness and heartbreak. Hope me. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 7, 2013 - 13 answers

Parents. Cheating. Way out of my depth.

My mom just found out my dad's been cheating on her. How do I deal with all of this from 3000 miles away? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 5, 2013 - 27 answers

Federal Civilian Pension after divorce. (US)

Asking for a friend. YANHL. A couple has divorced, wife has a local civil service pension and husband a federal civilian pension. The judge ruled they would split each pension 50/50, instead of letting them keep their own. She has sent her court order to his pension board and has received acknowledgement. She has been unable to get any answers from the pension board about what happens now. He has left federal service but has not retired. Does she have to wait until he retires to start receiving her monthly checks from the federal system? Can she start getting them when he reaches retirement age even if he's not retired? Who can she contact that will answer her questions? Would CC'ing her Senators/Rep on her emails help or hurt? Thanks.
posted by 1066 on Apr 4, 2013 - 6 answers

Tax Q: Gettin' divorced, can't claim deductions.

Here's the rub: In February on 2012, I decided to end my marriage. Because I was dead broke, we simply moved apart, split the bank account in two and went our separate ways with the understanding that we'd make a move to formally divorce in the next year. We did not get a legal separation. That divorce is now pending. My soon-to-be-ex-wife filed her taxes 'Married, Filing Separately'. This causing me all kind of tax havoc, including a bill I have no way of paying. More inside... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2013 - 28 answers

I would tell my BFF to DTMFA

Why am I having so much trouble leaving an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship? Or, tell me about your experience with leaving and how long it took you. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 28, 2013 - 19 answers

How to deal with a soon-to-be ex-spouse

My wife and I are getting divorced. At times she erupts at me with either overt or barely disguised hostility. How do I deal with the emotions caused by this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 27, 2013 - 34 answers

Any recommendations for a Cantonese speaking divorce lawyer in SF?

I am hoping that someone has a recommendation (or even a "stay away from") for a Cantonese-speaking divorce lawyer in the San Francisco area. [more inside]
posted by roquetuen on Mar 25, 2013 - 0 answers

Divorce/Custody Records from the 1970s?

Can you advise me how to go about getting the files for a particular divorce and attendant custody battle in CT in the 1970s? [more inside]
posted by annabellee on Mar 8, 2013 - 2 answers

Directors and Marriage Longevity

How many successful Film Directors are happily married...to their first wife (or husband)? Answers may be given as an estimated percentage if that's easier. [more inside]
posted by mousepad on Mar 7, 2013 - 18 answers

Separated From My Husband: The Blamer

My husband and I separated a couple months ago. Married 2 years. I'm going back and forth about whether our marriage is possibly salvageable or not. My main issue with him is that he blames me, a lot and frequently. He has trouble taking responsibility for his own emotional state and behavior. [more inside]
posted by WelcomeCat on Mar 4, 2013 - 62 answers

She has options. She should get away, I think.

A person close to me spoke about her relationship with her husband of 25 years. I say the symptoms she described are abuse in prototype form and I'm alarmed about it. Perhaps I am wrong; please help her and me figure out what's going on. Bonus points for next steps. [more inside]
posted by jet_silver on Mar 4, 2013 - 8 answers

To stay [gone] or go [back]?

My wife and I separated a few months ago (which was my choice, not hers) and it seems that many of the things that I left over may have been addressed, but I still feel cagey about it all. How do I square this circle in my head and in my heart? Blizzard inside. [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Feb 26, 2013 - 40 answers

On the brink of divorce, don't know what the hell to do about our cat

I think my marriage may be irreparably broken. The idea of splitting up is agonizing, but if things don't turn around soon, I can't stay. But. I don't know what to do about our cat, and it's tearing me apart. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 20, 2013 - 39 answers

Why do people get divorced after many, many years together?

It seems to me that if you've been fairly happy for many (10 - 25) years, this trend would continue. For many people that doesn't seem to be the case. I am interested in hearing theories or experiences regarding that. How can something that worked for so long cease to work so suddenly?
posted by Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night on Feb 19, 2013 - 71 answers

Do I leave, and if so what do I say?

Not an original story. I love my husband but I love someone else too. What do I do? Looooong explanation to follow, apologies. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 19, 2013 - 55 answers

Books for the Divorced / Divorcing Man

So my divorce took a crazy turn for the worst and all hope of reconciliation has flown out the window. Can anyone recommend books for a man in his late 30s / early 40s going through and recovering from a divorce? Any books for either dealing with the divorce itself or dealing with life after and re-entry to dating world would be great.
posted by entropicamericana on Feb 14, 2013 - 3 answers

Experience using services that report rental history to credit bureaus?

Rebuilding credit a few years post-divorce and home ownership, does anyone have experience with services like rentreporters.com that will report rental payment history to credit services? [more inside]
posted by cgk on Feb 10, 2013 - 1 answer

Who should be responsible for my ex-wife's birthday gift?

I've been divorced for several years now. My ex-wife and I get along amicably. I am single and she has been involved in an LTR since the divorce became official. Everything's fine, everyone's happy. Our kids are thriving.My ex-wife's birthday is in three weeks and up until now I've been the one to coordinate helping the kids get her something for her birthday. It occurred to me that it's probably time for the New Guy to take this over, right? They're not engaged, he still has his own place, but he does spend a lot of time there in your standard domestic situations. I have no problem discussing this with my ex, I'm just looking for a sanity-check on this idea before I bring it up. Am I missing something? Is this even a good idea? (For the record, I am single and she will probably be responsible for my birthdays (vis-a-vis the kids) for the forseeable future.)
posted by Setec Astronomy on Feb 8, 2013 - 20 answers

Possible long distance relationship with military man....advice

Hoping for advice, encouragement, discouragement, honesty, etc. I just ended a marriage (shy of one year) last year and am newly single as of four months, I was in a 6 year relationship which ended because I realized my ex was not faithful and continued to question our marriage. [more inside]
posted by love2much on Jan 29, 2013 - 12 answers

Legal document/evidence management software recommendations?

Friend is divorcing a high conflict personality (to put it more than politely). Since he is pro se, he generates a massive amount of emails and motions and false accusations etc. This results in having to collect a huge amount of documentation to be able to say in court "you're lying and here's the proof" [more inside]
posted by anon4now on Jan 28, 2013 - 9 answers

How to arrange family vacation with adult siblings but without parents?

My sister (married, one child) and I (married, no kids) want to plan a joint family vacation. We do not want our parents (divorced, both remarried) to come. Our mom is extremely sensitive/dramatic, and we are hoping to avoid a major meltdown from her. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 26, 2013 - 16 answers

Divorce and immigration attorney in Philadelphia area

I need recommendations for an attorney in the Philadelphia area, who can handle divorce and custody cases where one party (myself) is a non-US citizen, who is here on a marriage-based Green Card. The Card itself is about 2 years old.
posted by anonymous on Jan 24, 2013 - 4 answers

Is it still your business even though I left?

I split up with my wife a couple of months ago, and have been doing really well since then. Recently I've been feeling a little bit like she's been stalking me on social media, and today I've woken up to messages asking me why I'm in contact with someone from my past. How do I handle this? (I've tried to anonymise this as best I can) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 24, 2013 - 45 answers

Withholding in W4 - alimony/spousal support?

What withholding should I put in my W4 if I'm paying alimony/spousal support? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 22, 2013 - 6 answers

Need advice on my personal life affecting my career.

I am currently undergoing a career crisis and I need some wisdom, blunt feedback, and strategies for going forward. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 21, 2013 - 17 answers

Family lawyer in Winnipeg

Can you recommend a good divorce lawyer in Winnipeg (MB), Canada? Or, if you can't, can you tell me how I can find one? [more inside]
posted by TheGoodBlood on Jan 18, 2013 - 3 answers

Boyfriend? What's a boyfriend?

How to introduce boyfriend to son after a divorce. Personal experiences as the girlfriend, boyfriend, or the child? Advice? [more inside]
posted by youdontmakefriendswithsalad on Jan 15, 2013 - 19 answers

Does anyone make it back from the brink?

Have you been in a marriage or LTR where you were on the brink of breaking up but then you didn't? If so, how did that work? [more inside]
posted by dawkins_7 on Jan 15, 2013 - 10 answers

How to survive the death of father and a divorce?

My dad died a few days before Thanksgiving and my wife just left me (2 days after my birthday) and wants a divorce. Best survival tips? [more inside]
posted by entropicamericana on Jan 7, 2013 - 37 answers

Division of marital assets in Canada via RRSP and home equity.

Division of marital assets in Canada via RRSP and home equity. What are the pros and cons and what should be considered? [more inside]
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats on Jan 4, 2013 - 9 answers

How do I tell my co-workers I'm getting a divorce?

How do I tell my co-workers I'm getting a divorce? [more inside]
posted by Fister Roboto on Jan 2, 2013 - 17 answers

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