My husband of 8 years and I have come to an impasse: he wants a free-love, open relationship because he stifled his sexuality as a religious person before we were married, and I want...well, not that.
How do I move forward when it means breaking the most important bond I have?
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posted by SarahBellum
on May 7, 2013 -
28 answers
Asking for a friend. YANHL. A couple has divorced, wife has a local civil service pension and husband a federal civilian pension. The judge ruled they would split each pension 50/50, instead of letting them keep their own. She has sent her court order to his pension board and has received acknowledgement. She has been unable to get any answers from the pension board about what happens now. He has left federal service but has not retired.
Does she have to wait until he retires to start receiving her monthly checks from the federal system? Can she start getting them when he reaches retirement age even if he's not retired? Who can she contact that will answer her questions? Would CC'ing her Senators/Rep on her emails help or hurt? Thanks.
posted by 1066
on Apr 4, 2013 -
6 answers
A person close to me spoke about her relationship with her husband of 25 years. I say the symptoms she described are abuse in prototype form and I'm alarmed about it. Perhaps I am wrong; please help her and me figure out what's going on. Bonus points for next steps.
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posted by jet_silver
on Mar 4, 2013 -
8 answers
I've been divorced for several years now. My ex-wife and I get along amicably. I am single and she has been involved in an LTR since the divorce became official. Everything's fine, everyone's happy. Our kids are thriving.My ex-wife's birthday is in three weeks and up until now I've been the one to coordinate helping the kids get her something for her birthday. It occurred to me that it's probably time for the New Guy to take this over, right? They're not engaged, he still has his own place, but he does spend a lot of time there in your standard domestic situations. I have no problem discussing this with my ex, I'm just looking for a sanity-check on this idea before I bring it up. Am I missing something? Is this even a good idea? (For the record, I am single and she will probably be responsible for
my birthdays (vis-a-vis the kids) for the forseeable future.)
posted by Setec Astronomy
on Feb 8, 2013 -
20 answers
I'm ready to leave my unhappy, borderline-abusive, caretaker-y marriage (details in a series of posts, most recently
here). Do I just wait until I've got all my ducks in a row and then go, or should I be kinder, and give my spouse some kind of notice period.
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posted by six sided sock
on Nov 23, 2012 -
69 answers
Last night, while playing with Find My iPhone, I erased my wife's iPhone. That's right.
I erased my wife's iPhone. Apparently, it wasn't backing up to iCloud. Unless I have a good backup on her laptop via iTunes, I am screwed, right?
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posted by 4ster
on Sep 27, 2012 -
13 answers
Asking for a very dear friend, YANAL/YANHL/TINLA/OMG/WTF: my friend wants to divorce her emotionally-abusive husband. He doesn't want a divorce and intends to fight her tooth and nail. They live in MD. What to do?
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posted by julthumbscrew
on Sep 27, 2012 -
15 answers
How can I encourage my adult daughter from my first marriage to voice her opinions in my current divorce proceedings (of my second marriage) without it feeling like I'm dragging her into battle?
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posted by punocchio
on Aug 22, 2012 -
22 answers
About to start discussing divorce details. What do you wish you known, what would you have done differently, what do you regret, what are glad you did?
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posted by jennstra
on Aug 6, 2012 -
19 answers
My friend's and his ex are divorcing. The ex is being financially irresponsible, which could be influencing the outcome of the settlement. The lawyer has suddenly dropped of the face of the earth. What can my friend do to find out what's going on?
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posted by chatelaine
on Jul 25, 2012 -
18 answers
My fiance's parents moved back in together after almost 17 years of being divorced. I know it's really none of my business, but still I'm curious: has anybody else had parents that got back together after a long time apart, or has anybody done this themselves? How'd it go?
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posted by Rocket26
on May 16, 2012 -
19 answers
My in-laws engraved a silver bowl, with our names and wedding date, for our wedding. We're divorced. What the heck do we do with the bowl?
My ex-husband doesn't want it. It's not my style. I feel like there must be something better that I can do with it than give it to Goodwill. It's Oneida and silverplate (looks like only the exterior was plated). Ideas?
posted by rednikki
on Apr 22, 2012 -
17 answers
DivorceFilter Colorado: I have been told that there are guidelines for introducing children of a previous marriage to your a new romantic interest.
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posted by TauLepton
on Mar 11, 2012 -
11 answers
I'm looking for movies in which the main character is a divorced father.
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posted by Ratio
on Jan 25, 2012 -
40 answers
Is there anything a divorced mom with primary custody of three kids could say to their dad to get him to pay attention to his kids?
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posted by kinetic
on Jul 25, 2011 -
32 answers
Why is the divorce rate higher for those who have lived together before marriage than those who haven't?
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posted by coraline
on Jul 12, 2011 -
17 answers
How does selling an under water house where you bring cash to the closing
actually work? What happens if you come up short?
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posted by morganw
on Apr 27, 2011 -
7 answers
How, if it is even possible, can my father get out from under a nearly condemned home without still having a mortgage payment?
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posted by Quincy
on Mar 30, 2011 -
4 answers
I am no longer with the father of my child and he treats me like crap. In person, over email, on the phone. We've got a long way to go here - our kid isn't even three yet. I'm trying to not take it personally and to let it go, but I am struggling...
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posted by voneil
on Nov 18, 2010 -
28 answers
A colleague is going through a divorce. He told our boss and me that his wife left him last week. I feel really sorry for him. What should I do to support him through this period?
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posted by bbyboi
on Oct 13, 2010 -
12 answers
I want to perform some sort of ritual to observe the finalization of my parents' divorce but have no idea where to begin.
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posted by coppermoss
on Oct 10, 2010 -
15 answers
Can you recommend a family law/divorce lawyer in Austin, TX who is familiar with gay legal issues?
Difficulty: house, savings accounts, powers of attorney, medical directives, wills.
posted by dancestoblue
on Sep 21, 2010 -
2 answers
Book Recommendations for Post-Divorce pain and anxiety? Help me help my girlfriend who is recently divorced and consumed with fears about being alone. She needs something positive and empowering to give her some strength to face the future and get comfortable living alone. She's in her early 30s with one child and she initiated the divorce because she was so unhappy.
posted by nancoix
on Sep 10, 2010 -
10 answers
What legal, moral or ethical rights does ex-spouse A have when it comes to controlling ex-spouse B's dating habits, under the guise of protecting their children?
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posted by Ziggy Zaga
on Jun 16, 2010 -
17 answers
What should we as a couple be aware of when letting our friend come to live with us during his separation?
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posted by lilyflower
on Jun 1, 2010 -
15 answers
I need to find this. Very important to me.
Is there empirical evidence relating to this question:
Are there advantages for the children of divorced families being able to interact with both parents every day?
If so, what are those benefits?--Again, in terms of citable evidence.
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posted by justrobin
on Mar 5, 2010 -
3 answers
I’m in the process of divorcing, and starting to date seriously again. The catch: I’m absurdly young to be in this situation. How and when to break the news to dates?
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posted by ripley_
on Oct 20, 2009 -
24 answers
You're not my lawyer, but when getting a divorce, how does a house with an underwater mortgage count toward dividing assets?
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posted by cnc
on Oct 11, 2009 -
11 answers
I'm signing the papers for my divorce this week and moving to a new country (UK) next week. I'll be meeting new people and I'm looking for a word to call my ex-husband.
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posted by CdnMathTeacher
on Aug 2, 2009 -
26 answers
Would my three kids (17, 15, 10) be happier if we left the same town their dad lives in? I can't figure out if I'm allowing prolonged damage to my kids by letting them stay here because their dad is down the road but NEVER wants to see them. And where he lives bothers them (more later).
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posted by dzaz
on Jul 7, 2009 -
44 answers
My (widowed) father is divorcing his wife. Dad married her when my daughter was a toddler so she’s the only Grandma she’s had. Grandma has no interest in remaining friendly with our family. How do we tell our daughter that she won’t see her Grandma again without breaking her heart?
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posted by Mamapotomus
on Apr 11, 2007 -
26 answers