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127 posts tagged with divorce and marriage. (View popular tags)
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Good Source for Relationship Statistics

Does this exist? The popular myth is that 50% of marriages end in divorce, but those numbers are slippery. Is there a place with a good breakdown? [more inside]
posted by Athene on Aug 6, 2014 - 9 answers

Should I get back together with my ex-wife?

I could really use some input to help me sort through all of this. At 40 years old, she was having a lesbian affair and asked me to move out. I was devastated. But in hindsight, our marriage wasn't a good one. And I suppose it was just a matter of time before something came along to unravel the whole thing. Now she wants me back. I have no clue how I even feel, much less if I even want to try again. Wall of text inside. [more inside]
posted by normal_guy on Jul 17, 2014 - 37 answers

The "how" and the "who first"

While my concerns about divorcing my spouse are numerous, there are two in particular that I could really use some advice on. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 3, 2014 - 20 answers

Marriage in trouble, wife refuses relationship counseling. What next?

My wife Jane and I are in our 40s and have been together for eight years. We got along well for the first few years, but things have been steadily going south since then. In theory, we both want to improve our marriage, but we are not making much progress on our own. I could use some advice. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 21, 2014 - 48 answers

Should I leave my husband?

I married my husband almost a year ago. Prior to that we had been dating 6 months. I am 21. This person is my best friend who saved me from a very dark place in my life. He means a lot to me, and does so much for me. [more inside]
posted by wilywabbit on Apr 24, 2014 - 53 answers

How do I work out what to do next, without disrespecting my marriage.

Out of nowhere it seems, I’m considering asking my wife for a divorce and I can’t figure out if its because I met someone else I feel I’d really like to get to know or because I’ve realized that we just aren’t meant to be. Or am I just being a douche for even considering throwing away what I’m confident almost anyone would agree is a marriage to a great woman? Sorry for the long story… My wife is a great person – of course – why would you marry someone you didn’t think this about? The list is huge – she’s smart, funny, empathetic, gets me, is very beautiful and will one day I know make a really wonderful mother. I know most would say all of this about their spouse, but even with rational eyes, the above is true. She has bad points too for sure, but no need to list those off as well. We’ve only been married about 18 months, but together for some time before this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 17, 2014 - 58 answers

How do people find money to move out when separating or divorcing?

A asks B for a divorce. B is not surprised. B agrees, even though B would prefer to stay in an unhappy marriage rather than be branded with a scarlet D*. A wants to move out ASAP. Generally speaking, how do the financial logistics of this work? No special snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 11, 2014 - 17 answers

SSRIs and the end of romantic love

Four months after my husband went on Lexapro, I could see it in his face that he didn't love me anymore. At seven months, he asked to separate after four years of marriage. After finding this article online, I'm curious as to whether others have had similar experiences. Have you or your spouse experienced a decline in attachment/romantic love after starting an SSRI? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 18, 2013 - 71 answers

Considering divorce... or depression

Married almost 3 years, together for over 4 years. My husband is a funny, arrogant genius, and when I first met him he was very kind to me. Right after we got married, things changed... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 24, 2013 - 52 answers

My future just doesn't fit anymore

When leaving is terrifying, but staying's unbearable: please help me figure out what to do. [more inside]
posted by morninganyway on Nov 1, 2013 - 42 answers

How to live with my wife before the divorce?

My wife wants to leave me. In late March I discovered an affair she was having. We went through several months of what can best be described as "limbo" while she tried to decide what she wanted to do (leave or stay). At the end of July she announced "when I'm able, I'm going to move out." Problem is - the economics of this are basically impossible. So we still live in the same house. How can I make this easier for me? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 6, 2013 - 66 answers

Need advice: Is it time for a divorce, or do I ride this out?

Should I seriously be considering a divorce now, or give it more time? And if I do want to initiate a split--how do I do it, since this will totally blindside him? What else should I do to prepare if it comes to that? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 4, 2013 - 27 answers

How to prepare for a divorce that might or might not be coming

My husband is talking about getting a divorce. It is unclear to me whether he is serious or whether he is having a midlife crisis of some sort. Without knowing whether we will or won’t get divorced, what should I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 3, 2013 - 35 answers

Finally moving on - BUT how do I prioritize what's next..

So finally, I decided to take the bold step and move on to a bigger and brighter future (Hopefully, anyway!). I decided to divorce, on the grounds that I deserve better. [more inside]
posted by Spice_and_Ice on Aug 4, 2013 - 12 answers

How to prepare for a possible divorce?

A family member has confided in us that divorce is a distinct possibility. She has asked for advice on how to prepare for such eventuality. And I'm turning to the green to help us answer that question. Though as is customary, there is a monkey wrench thrown into the mix. [more inside]
posted by 7life on Jul 25, 2013 - 11 answers

When do you know a marriage therapist isn't right for you?

What are reliable questions that a person in marriage therapy can ask to determine that they are probably not with the right marriage therapist and should try someone else? Put another way, how can a person in marriage therapy know that the match with the therapist is a bad fit, as opposed to the problem being with the patient himself/herself? [more inside]
posted by scunning on Jun 25, 2013 - 14 answers

I need to end it. Please help me find the words.

The short version of how I got here – love my husband but fell in love with someone else. It’s not fair to him but I just don’t know how to say what I need to say. (Much) longer version inside. [more inside]
posted by outoftime on Jun 10, 2013 - 53 answers

"I'm not going to change"

The other day I had already had a bad day when my husband made an insensitive and crappy remark about something. I replied with tears in my eyes and said that he really had no idea about [subject]. Husband ignored that and then 5 minutes later cheerfully asked if I wanted to watch tv. I said no. He was surprised that I was "still mad" and we tried to talk about it, but I shut down because I felt vulnerable and remembered past talkings where I always felt like "too sensitive" and nothing would change anyway. This time, my husband apparently also thought the same because he said "Well, if you're unhappy, maybe you don't want to continue this relationship, because I'm not going to change". [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 30, 2013 - 40 answers

Tips to keep emotionally in shape during conjugal crises

What are the things that you did during a conjugal crises that helped you? [more inside]
posted by TheGoodBlood on Apr 9, 2013 - 4 answers

How to know if I want to stay in my marriage?

My wife and I are having a lot of problems in our marriage, have been for quite some time. Infidelity on both sides. Unresolved childhood trauma. Lack of trust and honesty from both parties. We have a wonderful life and two amazing children and are best friends, have been since high school. We're both starting therapy (separately) and then maybe marriage counseling. And I suppose this is one of those things that I can expect or hope to work out in therapy? But right now, how do I know if I should stay in my marriage? What signs did you have that your marriage was over or was salvageable?
posted by anonymous on Apr 9, 2013 - 13 answers

Directors and Marriage Longevity

How many successful Film Directors are happily married...to their first wife (or husband)? Answers may be given as an estimated percentage if that's easier. [more inside]
posted by mousepad on Mar 7, 2013 - 18 answers

To stay [gone] or go [back]?

My wife and I separated a few months ago (which was my choice, not hers) and it seems that many of the things that I left over may have been addressed, but I still feel cagey about it all. How do I square this circle in my head and in my heart? Blizzard inside. [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Feb 26, 2013 - 40 answers

On the brink of divorce, don't know what the hell to do about our cat

I think my marriage may be irreparably broken. The idea of splitting up is agonizing, but if things don't turn around soon, I can't stay. But. I don't know what to do about our cat, and it's tearing me apart. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 20, 2013 - 39 answers

Why do people get divorced after many, many years together?

It seems to me that if you've been fairly happy for many (10 - 25) years, this trend would continue. For many people that doesn't seem to be the case. I am interested in hearing theories or experiences regarding that. How can something that worked for so long cease to work so suddenly?
posted by Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night on Feb 19, 2013 - 71 answers

Is it still your business even though I left?

I split up with my wife a couple of months ago, and have been doing really well since then. Recently I've been feeling a little bit like she's been stalking me on social media, and today I've woken up to messages asking me why I'm in contact with someone from my past. How do I handle this? (I've tried to anonymise this as best I can) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 24, 2013 - 45 answers

Does anyone make it back from the brink?

Have you been in a marriage or LTR where you were on the brink of breaking up but then you didn't? If so, how did that work? [more inside]
posted by dawkins_7 on Jan 15, 2013 - 10 answers

My boyfriends borderline ex-wife is making me borderline crazy!

How should I address the fact that my boyfriend's unstable ex-wife continues to inappropriately contact him and his family? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 27, 2012 - 22 answers

Can my wife sue me for infidelity (and what does that even mean?)

Can my wife sue me for infidelity (and what does that even mean?) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 23, 2012 - 11 answers

Selfish or selfless? I can't tell.

I'm ready to leave my unhappy, borderline-abusive, caretaker-y marriage (details in a series of posts, most recently here). Do I just wait until I've got all my ducks in a row and then go, or should I be kinder, and give my spouse some kind of notice period. [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Nov 23, 2012 - 69 answers

how to initiate a separation?

i'm unhappy in my marriage but my wife is very dependent on me. how do i do this? [more inside]
posted by saraswati on Nov 12, 2012 - 22 answers

Marriage on your permanent record

Does a previous marriage show up on a background check? [more inside]
posted by fugitivefromchaingang on Nov 12, 2012 - 14 answers

I am so stuck. The time has come to end my marriage and I can't get the words out.

I feel like I am experiencing sleep paralysis--I know I want to wake up but I just can't move. I've had no shortage of difficult life challenges over the years. Leaving a drug-addled, abusive family behind, holding dying loved ones, quitting cigarettes, I've ended LTRs in the past (and had them ended by partners too). I am not an over-thinker or an indecisive person and this feels so weird. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 2, 2012 - 5 answers

My sister is separating and likely divorcing her husband after 15 months of marriage, and my family strongly disagrees with her decision. Do we tell her this?

My sister is separating and likely divorcing her husband after 15 months of marriage, and my family strongly disagrees with her decision. Do we tell her this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 21, 2012 - 65 answers

Can a healthy marriage last?

How do I regain my trust in marriage when my role models of healthy marriage are separating? [more inside]
posted by horizonseeker on Oct 5, 2012 - 16 answers

Between a rock and a hard place

I have recently separated from my wife of 6 years and have moved out of the family home into temporary accommodation. It has been about a month since I left and I am in a very confused place at the moment. My wife has put forward an ultimatum that is tearing me apart and I would appreciate some perspective from the hive mind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 25, 2012 - 79 answers

Things are bad.

Our marriage is crumbling, and it's taking me with it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 13, 2012 - 29 answers

Some semblance of normality?

I'm increasingly certain that my marriage is  dying, and I need some help negotiating the time between now and my first realtionship counselling appointment. (Apologies for the long post) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 24, 2012 - 27 answers

My friend is in crisis. What can I do?

My friend is in extreme crisis after his wife of seven years left him completely out of the blue. I'm not sure what to do to help him. Relevant details inside. [more inside]
posted by ronofthedead on Jun 8, 2012 - 19 answers

I just asked my husband for a divorce and he is in complete denial about it.

I just asked my husband for a divorce and he is in complete denial about it. It's like I never asked. How do you tell someone you want a divorce when they won't listen to you? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 29, 2012 - 17 answers

How can I convince my wife to come to marriage counselling sessions with me?

I'm trying to convince my wife to attend marriage counselling with me, but I'm having a hard time doing so. Her opinion of marriage counselling (based on what she's read online) is that it's a waste of money and that a marriage counsellor would "only tell us what we already know." When I've pointed out that a marriage counsellor is there to help facilitate communication, her response has been "if we need a facilitator to help us communicate we're fucked anyway." Reasons for needing counselling + bonus snowflakery inside. Apologies; it turned into a bit of a mind-dumpy wall of text. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 21, 2012 - 21 answers

Should I stay or should I go?

Husband's mental health problems led him to compulsively spend over £27,000 (about $44,000) while I supported both of us for three years. I know he'll work hard on therapy, but I don't know if I should divorce him. Should I try and forgive? [warning, long!] [more inside]
posted by TriparteGoddess on Apr 29, 2012 - 62 answers

Separated from wife, got involved with someone else, should I reconcile with my wife?

I've been separated from my wife for over six months. During that time I got involved with someone else, but now I'm thinking about going back to my wife. Please tell me I'm not making a mistake. [more inside]
posted by quoth_the_raven on Apr 23, 2012 - 53 answers

Facing divorce and depression

I'm lost. I'm facing divorce of my wife of 5 years. I've been with her for longer than that, 10, 12 years. We have a 3 year old son. I need help. How can one survive this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 21, 2012 - 37 answers

Go Together Like a Horse and a Glue Factory

Date filter: When do I tell my date that I'm in the middle of a divorce? Also, how should I go about telling? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 1, 2012 - 34 answers

Is this really what I want?

If this divorce is really what I want, why do I keep second-guessing myself? [more inside]
posted by tryniti on Jan 16, 2012 - 32 answers

What do you wish you knew before you committed to a relationship with a divorced person who has a child?

What do you wish you knew before you committed to a relationship with a divorced person who has a child? [more inside]
posted by JoannaC on Jan 12, 2012 - 21 answers

Life moves on

What do you wish you had known before you separated from your spouse? [more inside]
posted by postel's law on Dec 7, 2011 - 20 answers

Broaching the awkward/weird topic of marriage and divorce

I have a question about broaching the awkward/weird topic of marriage with my current SO. (Warning: I'm providing as much _anonymous_ backstory as I possibly can, please forgive any awkward grammar in view of this) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 3, 2011 - 21 answers

When is it okay to keep the baggage in the bag?

Should I tell my (potential) new boyfriend about my marriage and divorce? Or can I keep this secret like I want to? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 28, 2011 - 53 answers

You're gone and that's it.

My estranged ex-husband committed suicide a month ago. I am unsure about whether I need grief counseling or not or how much good it's going to do me. [more inside]
posted by asockpuppet on Nov 12, 2011 - 22 answers

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