95 posts tagged with dementia.
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Years of your granddaughter's life are being ignored.

How do I deal with my MIL choosing to ignore her only grandchild over her already-gone mother with dementia? [more inside]
posted by side effect on Jan 4, 2017 - 63 answers

Parent looks to be developing dementia.

I believe my 73-year-old mother is developing dementia. Now what? [more inside]
posted by La Gata on Dec 10, 2016 - 15 answers

How Do I Get My Mentally-Ill Mother Permanent Help?

The situation described in this question has gotten both better and worse. I'm stuck in yet another bind with regard to my mother, who has been hospitalized but cannot live by herself. They may release her on Monday to her home, where she has no supervision and is being evicted. I know that I shouldn't be the primary caregiver - I do not WANT to be the primary caregiver - but I am, and now I need to make sure that my mother has a safe place to unravel. More details within. [more inside]
posted by Ashen on Oct 29, 2016 - 10 answers

Credit card spending and dementia

My increasingly demented elderly mom has been making tons of online purchases. What should be my next steps to solve this. I have power of attorney. [more inside]
posted by latkes on Sep 2, 2016 - 21 answers

How hard is it to create a "speed of processing" video game

Game used in study covered everywhere seems way overpriced. Alternatives? [more inside]
posted by Pembquist on Aug 1, 2016 - 8 answers

How to coordinate medicare and long term care insurance

My great aunt is in a nursing home for rehab due to a broken hip. She has dementia and the nursing home says they have to discharge her because she's not making progress. I have no idea what to do next. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 26, 2016 - 13 answers

How to help my SIL who is dealing w/husband w/dementia (early Alzheimer

My sister-in-law is the most empathetic, caring for others person in the world & she is dealing with something hard: a husband who has been diagnosed with "dementia" in his mid-60s. The problem is finances... [more inside]
posted by spock on Jul 7, 2016 - 5 answers

Presents for an engineering type?

I have a family member with Alzheimer's and I would like some help with gadget or engineery birthday presents for him. I always bought him books before as he was a reader and a novelist, but he says he can't concentrate enough to read now and I'm stuck! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 5, 2016 - 8 answers

Am I killing my mom?

Mom has early dementia. Dad just had a stroke. I'm being the tough guy and intervening on her book hoarding. Now doubting myself... help! [more inside]
posted by latkes on Mar 19, 2016 - 37 answers

Gaslighting or Alzheimer’s?

My new supervisor in her late 60s said something very inappropriate, and when I told her it wasn’t professional she denied saying it. I repeated what I heard, and she asked if I thought she was lying. She shows signs of early dementia. I’m concerned she’s either gaslighting me or has Alzheimer’s. What have been your experiences in dealing with this kind of situation? Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by mountainpeak on Mar 13, 2016 - 37 answers

How do I help my paranoid, elderly mom in rapid mental decline?

My elderly mom is experiencing a delusion that seems to be rapidly worsening. I am her only family and live 8 hours away. She will not see a doctor. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by Locative on Mar 3, 2016 - 23 answers

Telling a Patient they have Alzheimer's

This is not anything I have to decide as it is about a close friend, not a relative, but there are several of us who have been friends since high school and we are very concerned about the friend who has been diagnosed with Alzheimers last year, but her daughter has made the decision for now not to tell her what the diagnosis is. Friend and daughter live across the country, so anything we can do is long distance, and we do not really know how to deal with this. [more inside]
posted by mermayd on Jan 28, 2016 - 18 answers

Third party guardianship for elderly

An elderly person refused to make a will or get his affairs in order in any way (he was asked multiple times and given many opportunities). He now has dementia and can no longer make decisions. He has no spouse or children. His heirs are his nieces and nephews, who do not get along, do not trust each other, and do not agree on what is best for him. What are the pros and cons of a third-party, court-appointed guardian? [more inside]
posted by FencingGal on Jan 26, 2016 - 11 answers

Dealing with elderly family that suddenly is rejecting me?

My grandmother, in her late 80's, has recently and quite abruptly decided that she does not want myself, my brother, or my mother (her daughter) in her life. We suspect she is in cognitive decline but have no formal diagnosis. She has decided to cling to my unstable and very hard to deal with aunt, which is problematic for several reasons. I am not sure how to proceed here, both from a legal standpoint to ensure my grandmother is taken care of properly and from a personal standpoint to navigate any remaining hope of a relationship. More details inside. [more inside]
posted by calitocarolina on Dec 13, 2015 - 7 answers

Cell phone that doesn't act like cell phone (for dementia patient)

My 90-year-old aunt was just admitted to a nursing home, and they aren't set up to have landlines in individual rooms. For patients to have phones in their rooms, relatives need to provide cell phones. My aunt has some dementia. She still enjoys talking on the phone (and most of us live hundreds of miles away, so it's important), but she really is incapable of learning anything new. When I talk to her, she often won't remember something I said just five minutes before. More below. [more inside]
posted by FencingGal on Nov 27, 2015 - 14 answers

Have you cared for a dementia sufferer who hasn't accepted their illness?

This month the progress of my father's dementia came to a decision point, as his drivers license was suspended on Halloween. Getting him to give up driving has been fraught, as one might expect. I've been kicked out of his house twice now, but have ultimately managed to get him to stop driving. I don't blame him, as I know it's his illness, but I'm left wondering if I have to accept that he is incapable of cooperating at all in getting him the care he needs. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 18, 2015 - 15 answers

How Can I Cope With Being a Primary Caregiver?

My mom has dementia. She's in denial about this dementia, and her denial has created some difficulties. I feel guilty, but acting as her primary caregiver is starting to affect me adversely. [more inside]
posted by Ashen on Oct 15, 2015 - 25 answers

A good evening out

I'm giving a church-related dinner in a couple of weeks. Two people on the guest list happen to have neurological problems that make conversation difficult for them. I'm looking for advice on how to make sure they feel included in the conversation and enjoy themselves. [more inside]
posted by tully_monster on Oct 12, 2015 - 3 answers

Getting Mom On Board with In-Home Care

Recently my 62-year-old mom mom was hospitalized and committed due to—as best I can gather from a vague diagnosis—Wernicke-Korsakoff syndrome (aka "wet brain") as a result of alcoholism, malnutrition and thiamine deficiency (Here's my previous question on this subject). Now she's home, but unable to live on her own—though she can't admit it. Help me convince her she needs in-home care. Details below. [more inside]
posted by straycatinthewildwest on Aug 17, 2015 - 9 answers

How to deal with unruly dementia behavior

We've been hosting my FIL with mild dementia in our house for the past 6 months or so, after his living situation suddenly changed. Things were OK for the most part until recently. The novelty of living in a new house (to him) has worn off and he has exhausted his interest in his normal hobbies. He has become quite bored and lonely. [more inside]
posted by Don_K on Jul 9, 2015 - 22 answers

Is it dementia?

My dad has been acting emotionally erratic and saying and doing inappropriate things in the last year. We lost my mom to ALS about 1.5 years ago, and he is understandably depressed. He's repeating stories or anecdotes two or three times in the same conversation. He's using very inappropriate language and subjects around my two young daughters. He also has been doing things like speaking loudly during quiet graduation and funeral services and having disproportionate emotional outbursts. Is this depression, or could it be dementia or Alzheimer's? [more inside]
posted by percor on Jul 6, 2015 - 21 answers

How can I be a good houseguest to someone with mild dementia?

At the end of the week I'll be staying overnight at the home of someone who is clearly exhibiting some early dementia symptoms. I've been incredibly lucky that no one in my family has ever had to deal with this before firsthand and I just want some tips so I don't accidentally be a jerk. [more inside]
posted by phunniemee on Jul 6, 2015 - 27 answers

Genetic testing for Pick's Disease

Two part question. First - my family strongly suspects my father has late-stage Pick's Disease, which is a form of fronto-temporal dementia. It can't be truly diagnosed until an autopsy though. He's post-65. He has most of the symptoms. So I have two very related questions. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 27, 2015 - 5 answers

Techniques for improving memory in older people

I'm looking for ways an older relative can improve his memory, which has become very poor, probably because of anxiety and post-chemotherapy issues. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 18, 2015 - 10 answers

Memory Loss

Please tell me everything that is known about preventing dementia. [more inside]
posted by latkes on Apr 20, 2015 - 23 answers

help my friend Alzheimers-proof his house

My friend from this question needs advice and direction caring for his mom in her home. Her dementia is getting steadily worse, and last weekend she went wandering. [more inside]
posted by Koko on Feb 12, 2015 - 21 answers

My dog is going crazy (I think) and it's driving us crazy!

I have an elderly beagle who has always been abnormal. Now she seems to really be going crazy for real and it's driving us a little crazy. What's the best way to handle this? [more inside]
posted by geeky on Feb 5, 2015 - 14 answers

alzheimers and moms: what's the latest?

I've just been reading a review of the latest film treatment of Alzheimers ("Still Alice"), which has the character inherit her early-onset version of the disease from her alcoholic father. But at least for a while, it seemed like the medical thinking linked Alzheimer's to mitochondrial DNA, so that it would be linked to the mother's genetic profile. I realize that it's a hideously complex disease, with or without alcoholism as a factor, but is the maternal-line theory valid?
posted by mmiddle on Jan 16, 2015 - 5 answers

How and where to get special training for a dog?

Is it possible to get a dog trained to help someone who suffers from episodes of dementia? Specifically, could a dog be trained to help someone who will go for walks without their shoes, keys etc., ending up lost and unsure of how they got there? [more inside]
posted by keeo on Nov 21, 2014 - 2 answers

Dad with dementia has moved aged care homes - how to help him cope?

My dad has multiple health problems and dementia, but since moving into care his mental and physical health have improved. Now we've had to move him to a new place and he's really unhappy there. How can we help him cope? Have you had similar experiences with an elderly relative? [more inside]
posted by andraste on Nov 4, 2014 - 12 answers

Suggestions for daily humor site geared towards dementia people?

My brother and his wife both have dementia and are currently living in a memory care home and need notes from home. [more inside]
posted by Tullyogallaghan on Oct 31, 2014 - 11 answers

Looking for elder care LA/BOS/NYC?

My 87 year old mom is currently at the Psych ward in Fall River, RI. Her mental health has been deteriorating recently and we are looking into places that she might be comfortable at if and when she is no longer able to be at home in Wellfleet, Cape Cod with 24 hour care. [more inside]
posted by silsurf on Jul 21, 2014 - 6 answers

Please help us get my mom into memory care!

Central Indiana - I need elder care help today! Please help us! [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad on May 31, 2014 - 111 answers

crazy gun loving neighbor

My neighbor is crazy, owns guns, has tried to kill himself, and hates me. [more inside]
posted by cirrostratus on May 26, 2014 - 28 answers

How to block outgoing calls

My Grandmother has dementia. She calls her old phone number 20+ times a day to ask for a ride home. Unfortunately, this number is now used by a business, the owner of which is not too pleased with the multiple phone calls a day. [more inside]
posted by backwords on Mar 6, 2014 - 30 answers

Controlling phone usage

An elderly parent is suffering from an illness which impairs lucidity and judgment, and make inappropriate use of the phone (running Android Taking the phone away is a last resort. Do others have experience of managing this? Are there any technological or human hacks we could use to manage this without distressing them? Not US based, if it matters. [more inside]
posted by sockofdreams on Nov 3, 2013 - 21 answers

Should I vote for Mom with Dementia?

My mom has dementia. For the last 5-6 years, I've helped her fill in her mail-in ballot. We've talked about her choices (to the best of her ability). This is the first election where I feel that she can't participate in choosing who to vote for. I've brought it up with her, but she isn't engaging at all. However, I know how she would want to vote. Voting in every election since she became old enough has been a tremendous point of pride for her. She's always been an engaged and active participant: walking precincts, helping with mailings, going to candidate forums (until the dementia really took hold). Part of me feels like I would be honoring the person she was by casting this ballot (probably the last one), but part of me feels that by casting her ballot without any participation from her, I'm committing fraud. What say you, wise Mefites?
posted by agatha_magatha on Nov 1, 2013 - 26 answers

What to do when a supervisor is facing dementia?

One of my friends has a supervisor (director of a non-profit) that is showing major signs of dementia. He forgets what happens in meetings, doesn't do tasks he is supposed to do, forgets what keys are to be used for which locks, etc. It is hurting the organization, and hurting her in particular because it is causing her to have major burnout taking care of everything going wrong. She is also worried about how she can get him to take better care of himself, and recognize/treat what is happening. He is married with no kids. What should/can she do? FWIW this is in Texas. *Let's assume we know there is a real cognitive decline, not just stress, etc.
posted by powerbumpkin on Sep 23, 2013 - 16 answers

How can we get my mom to eat?

My mom had a stomach tube placed before radiation for throat cancer, because she had previously lost 20 pounds (she's 4'10", so that's a lot to lose) after surgery for the same cancer. She's now a month out of radiation, eating very very little (like 2 bites a meal) and getting most calories from feed tube. She had relatively mild dementia before all this; it's now progressed to pretty severe short term memory loss, though she is still on pain meds (vicodan) which could be skewing things. She is in skilled nursing but medicare will no longer cover and the recommendation is for a long term nursing home placement. [more inside]
posted by Cocodrillo on Sep 20, 2013 - 18 answers

Elderly parents filter: One healthy, one not so much

My in-laws cannot live 120 miles from us on their own any longer. This is true. My mother-in-law is relatively healthy and 73 with all her mental faculties. My father in law is physically very healthy and 83 with dementia. Where do they live together? Snow flurry inside. [more inside]
posted by Sophie1 on Sep 11, 2013 - 6 answers

Paranoia = Dementia?

My parents sort of lost it after the 2004 election. I think they're getting even more out of touch and I don't know what to do as they age. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 2, 2013 - 33 answers

Grandpa must be crazy pt. II

My previous post from 2007 gets the sequel treatment. Here's the post. [more inside]
posted by Che boludo! on May 10, 2013 - 16 answers

Brother with dementia needs help in processing his email - any advice?

I just spend an hour searching for a site I found a few months ago and 'have come up with nothing. My 80 year old brother who has moderate vascular dementia wants to be able to process his email again but it is just beyond him. [more inside]
posted by Tullyogallaghan on Apr 7, 2013 - 4 answers

Advice for adult children of mentally-not-all-there parents?

How do balance respecting a parent's age and experience and treating them well when they aren't acting their age? Sorry for the length. I am not sure how to make it shorter. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 2, 2013 - 19 answers

Sick and elderly father is not competent, has crushing debt. Now what?

My father had a profound stroke. He now has severe dementia and delusions. Sibling and I need to get power of attorney and also speak with a lawyer to determine long-term issues and help get rid of his crushing debt. Do I need an elder law attorney or an estate planning attorney, and what else might I need to know? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 17, 2013 - 8 answers

How can I support Mom through Dad's failing mental health?

My Dad is in his late 60's and through some combination of age, TIA's, and overmedication, he is at some times out of it and inappropriate, and at all times tired and lethargic. My Mom is struggling horribly with this as she's unwilling to see herself entirely as a caretaker, and she enables him with regards to alcohol and drugs, and beats up on herself over things she can't control. I'd like to support her and give her good guidance without being overly harsh. [more inside]
posted by ftm on Jan 31, 2013 - 10 answers

Not playing in Peoria

I have to go to Peoria, IL for a week starting February 6 to tend to the affairs of my mother, whose dementia is getting worse. I grew up there but I haven't been back for years, and when I did go back I stayed at Mom's. Now there is no room at Mom's because she's in assisted care. Where should I stay? [more inside]
posted by caryatid on Jan 22, 2013 - 11 answers

Riddle me this.

Good puzzle book (or series of books) for bright senior mom with mild confusion/dementia? [more inside]
posted by Currer Belfry on Jan 21, 2013 - 3 answers

Looking for newer iPad apps for Dementia

My father is 91, speaks English and an avid TV-viewer. He had never been into word games or games like Sudoku or board games. He used to play golf till his early eighties. .From the mini- metal state test he has moderate dementia and we are hoping that together with the Aricept that he is on, some 'engaging' apps ( as someone put it ) might stave off deterioration of his cognitive functions. [more inside]
posted by kryptos on Nov 17, 2012 - 7 answers

Only child with aging parents far away

How do I take care of my aging parents long distance? I'm an only child with small children of my own and feel alone in this situation. [more inside]
posted by percor on Nov 12, 2012 - 18 answers

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