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88 posts tagged with decisions.
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Buying duplicates/multiples - when is it a good idea and when isn't it?

I often obsess in my head about how many of X item I should buy at a time. What is your process for deciding this with maximum end satisfaction for any given category? [more inside]
posted by vegartanipla on Nov 29, 2014 - 16 answers

How to pick a therapist to help my anxiety (before pregnancy/parenting)

How do I pick the right therapist to help with my anxiety, stress, indecisiveness, and perfectionist tendencies? What kinds of therapy/techniques/approaches might be most helpful? How do I quickly assess whether to stick with someone or look elsewhere? What are reasonable expectations of how much I can improve in therapy and how quickly? I'm terrible at making decisions-- I need help! (Especially since we want to start trying for kids in a few months so I feel real urgency to make progress quickly to feel comfortable going ahead, for both my and the kid's sake.) DC-area, FYI. [more inside]
posted by SockHop on Nov 24, 2014 - 4 answers

Managing relationship doubts while depressed

I've been with my girlfriend for 5+ years, and lived together for 4. We've moved around the country together, adopted a pet together, and spent a lot of time thinking about/planning our next move together (we've moved around a lot, most recently so she could go to school). Lately, though, I've had significant, plaguing doubts about whether we should be together, and I'm having trouble parsing what's really going on. [more inside]
posted by batscam on Nov 16, 2014 - 14 answers

Decision framework for a tough career decision

I've been freelancing for the last year, but expecting a job offer in the next few days. I am genuinely torn abut whether I want to accept. I go back and forth daily. Yesterday I was pretty strongly leaning towards taking it. Today the idea depresses me. I'd appreciate your recommendations on tools to help me make this decisions. Snowflakes follow... [more inside]
posted by dry white toast on Oct 28, 2014 - 6 answers

Help my wife choose a career

Since leaving university a few years ago with a humanities degree (human geography with Spanish), my wife's mostly worked as a temp in an admin position for the same company. Her plan was to do this while deciding what she really wanted to do; two years later, and she's still no closer to making any decisions but as dissatisfied with her current work as ever... [more inside]
posted by jonrob on Oct 11, 2014 - 10 answers

Historical situations where the seemingly right choice was very wrong

I'm looking for historical/political situations or decisions that made perfect, logical sense at the time but in retrospect seem terribly misguided or worse. These should be situations that when presented very simply, it is clear and easy to say, "Obviously XYZ is the right choice " but where in fact XYZ ends up being an awful choice. Example and further details inside. [more inside]
posted by _DB_ on Oct 9, 2014 - 43 answers

How true is this, really?

In your personal experience, how true are quotes like these? "In the end, we only regret the chances we did not take" or "Regret for the things we have done will be tempered by time. It is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.” [more inside]
posted by puppet du sock on Sep 16, 2014 - 34 answers

Should I study to become a cranial osteopath?

I am not sure if I should spend 4 or 5 years training to be an osteopath in London, which is where I live, or if I should give up this idea completely. I've been thinking about becoming an osteopath for a while now, but I am 23 which means I will be at least 27 by the time I finish, which is quite late, plus will be significantly poorer. There are other things to take into consideration, explained more in detail inside. [more inside]
posted by akita on Sep 16, 2014 - 14 answers

I got an offer for a dream job. Help me decide if I should take it.

This was me. Following the advice from that question I both renewed my contract with current company and actively started looking elsewhere. I've just received an enthusiastic offer from another company, but I want to be mindful about my next step. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 9, 2014 - 18 answers

How do I get better at / get over anxiety making small decisions?

I agonize over making small decisions (what should I eat for lunch, should I start a new series or re watch an old favorite). When information is available I will spend an hour or so researching before I decide (Yelp). When information is not available I will put off the decision. It's getting worse and I'm unhappy living life paralyzed. [more inside]
posted by puertosurf on Jul 1, 2014 - 15 answers

Which treatment option should I choose?

I have trigeminal neuralgia, aka "the suicide disease." Good times! I've been given four treatment options: lifelong heavy-duty medication, having a needle stuck into my face with a few months' relief, CyberKnife radiology, or microvascular decompression surgery. Which should I choose? How do I even approach this decision? Difficulty level: I want to get pregnant, but I don't know when. [more inside]
posted by mynameisluka on Jun 22, 2014 - 19 answers

To IVF or not IVF

I'm conflicted about using IVF to conceive, but at this point it's my only option. I have severe endometriosis and the eggs reserve of someone close to 40 (I've just turned 35). I've been trying to conceive for 19 months and have done everything except IVF. How do I decide what to do? [more inside]
posted by purple24 on Jun 19, 2014 - 17 answers

How do I stop taking others' decisions as an indictment of my own?

I seem to have this problem where I will get worked up, disappointed, upset, and distressed--a combination of all four--whenever someone makes a decision that is wholly unrelated to me but is a different one than I would have made. It has moved beyond someone being wrong on the Internet over the past few years and is really starting to drive me bonkers. Do you, denizens of the green, have any advice for changing my behavior? [more inside]
posted by fireoyster on Jun 17, 2014 - 12 answers

Anxiety and Fear-Based Decisions

Yes, another anxiety-related question from me. I'm sorry. I'm currently in the throes of a possible breakup, and I've recently realized that I'm making far too many decisions based on fear - fear of having a panic attack, fear of getting sick, fear of having needs. This has damaged my relationship. I need to stop this behavior, but I'm not sure how to do so without becoming non-functional from the resulting anxiety. [more inside]
posted by msbadcrumble on May 30, 2014 - 8 answers

In a relationship, in love with a friend, need to make some decisions

I’m in a stable and loving relationship that is approaching the deadline for commitment. I’ve had strong feelings for someone else for a long time, which I’ve managed to control, but have recently resurfaced with a vengeance, and are making me seriously question whether to commit. Help! [more inside]
posted by ashkenazy on May 27, 2014 - 33 answers

Istanbul versus Berlin

I've been accepted to two summer programs in two great cities! I am indecisive and have only a few more days to decide which travel grant to accept. [more inside]
posted by gemutlichkeit on Apr 26, 2014 - 20 answers

Switching MA programs

I'm finishing my second semester of a MA program, and am realizing that I am not happy in this program and (most importantly) it isn't fulfilling my academic and professional needs. I have identified another MA program which I know would be a good fit for me, and am considering switching. Assuming money is no object here, would I be crazy to make the switch? [more inside]
posted by schroedingersgirl on Mar 31, 2014 - 7 answers

Help! Which entry level job should I take?

In looking for entry-level work, I interviewed for a ton of positions, and somehow have gotten myself into the spot of being hired for 3 places all at once. Need advice ASAP as two of them want me to start as soon as tomorrow! [more inside]
posted by stockpuppet on Jan 29, 2014 - 17 answers

How do I decide if I want us to have a baby?

I'm having a difficult time deciding whether I want my wife and I to get pregnant. She is very into it, but I have mixed feelings. How do I decide if I'm ready? [more inside]
posted by jsharke on Jan 14, 2014 - 60 answers

How do you make life-changing decisions?

How do you go about making huge decisions that will significantly impact every aspect of your life? Is there a system or method for doing this well? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 6, 2014 - 34 answers

My partner has a child, he's feuding with the mother, I can't handle it

I'm stuck in the town where I just finished university, because I'm engaged to Jake, who has a child here, Finn. Jake had Finn with Kaitlyn when she was 16 and he was 18. Finn is now 4. I could move anywhere I want and make a living. I'm happy with Jake, but I'm unhappy with life as a whole, depressed, have low self-esteem. Jake has only limited contact rights to his son and a whole lot of trouble with Kaitlyn, who hates me. We live together and I am the sole-earner in this household, in the awful UK economy. I haven't left the house all year, I've just been working yet I'm still in debt and I want to get away. On the other hand I love Jake, we have so much in common and we never even argue, even though the year that we've been together life has been very difficult. We really love and respect each other. I have great hope in him, I'm excited to meet his son and I think we could make a life together. Except it would all take years. And I'm at the end of my tether and want to leave now. [more inside]
posted by mangoprawn on Oct 29, 2013 - 72 answers

The pro/con list just isn't cutting it

I have an amazing-on-paper/tough-in-reality job, and now an offer for a new position that is a total unknown. I am panicking about this decision. [more inside]
posted by sabotagerabbit on Oct 20, 2013 - 17 answers

Was I sexually violated?

Was I sexually violated? I keep obsessing about this, I don't know if the other parties care or have declared me a pariah [more inside]
posted by Jewel98 on Oct 6, 2013 - 42 answers

Wondering if I should go back to college

I had a talk with my gf who recently dumped me. She told me that she needed to be with someone with similar life experiences as hers. School is a big part of her life, and she is working toward a degree in medicine as well as an MBA (she already has another master's in biology). I'm 28, and at one point in my life I was very bent on finishing college, but till now I haven't been able to because of circumstances in my life. What she said made me think about my decision to postpone college for now. I have a writing business that is just now getting off the ground. I haven't even earned a two-year degree, but it hasn't stopped me from utilizing my writing talents to make a living. On the other hand though, going back to school would help me a lot in the long run to gain expertise and credibility in the fields i write in. [more inside]
posted by Cybria on Aug 4, 2013 - 18 answers

Seeing a way out of this affair.

I am involved in a messy, emotionally exhausting affair that feels like it's getting to a fork in the road. Can you help with a roadmap? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 11, 2013 - 45 answers

One job offer in the hand is worth two in the bush?

Should I take a job I don't really want, or pass it up in the *hope* that my old work hires me back in a month or two? [more inside]
posted by winterportage on Jun 26, 2013 - 19 answers

Decisions, decisions...

How can I avoid analysis paralysis in decision-making and pick what's "right for me" more consistently? How can I minimize regret? [more inside]
posted by Seeking Direction on Mar 4, 2013 - 25 answers

Is this friendship worth saving?

I have a problem. I have a friend. They're mutually inclusive. Let's call him Greg. [more inside]
posted by piratesriding on Feb 21, 2013 - 32 answers

Can I have the life I want and also have kids?

If I become a parent, I don't want to be a typical one. I also don't want to be anything like my own parents. How do you maintain your own life? What are some movies/TV shows/books/memoirs can help me get a feel for how non-stereotypical-suburban-American people treat their kids? [more inside]
posted by 3491again on Dec 7, 2012 - 51 answers

Selfish or selfless? I can't tell.

I'm ready to leave my unhappy, borderline-abusive, caretaker-y marriage (details in a series of posts, most recently here). Do I just wait until I've got all my ducks in a row and then go, or should I be kinder, and give my spouse some kind of notice period. [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Nov 23, 2012 - 69 answers

To resuscitate or not to resuscitate

How do you reconcile end-of-life decisions with your partner? [more inside]
posted by thrasher on Aug 15, 2012 - 26 answers

Culture and groupthink.

Is there a cultural dynamic to groupthink? [more inside]
posted by espada0 on Mar 25, 2012 - 7 answers

Difficult Decisions, Missed Opportunities and a Dog

Some people say: “If you have doubt, it is there for a reason.” Other people say: “Everyone has doubt. Don’t miss a golden opportunity because you don’t feel ready. No one ever feels 100% ready for anything until it happens.” What is the line between a rational decision and a missed opportunity, and how do I tell the difference? Disclaimer: Not really about the dog. [more inside]
posted by emoemu on Mar 11, 2012 - 19 answers

Sewing machine service vs. upgrading?

Sewing machine issues: should I go for a service, or upgrade to a better model? [more inside]
posted by robintw on Feb 8, 2012 - 6 answers

Mind-blowing. Decisions.

Somehow, I seem to have lost the ability to make confident decisions - and the trivial ways in which this happens is having a non-trivial impact on my life. How can I address this?: [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 6, 2011 - 13 answers

Why can't I make decisions?

I find it nearly impossible to make decisions, particularly if I have two equally good options. I always regret whichever one I choose. I'm a graphics student and yesterday I had to choose whether to take illustration or film this semester. After hours of weighing pros and cons I went with illustration, then I spent the rest of the day convincing myself I should've picked film. Now I've been given the option to switch, and I still can't decide! How do I stop driving myself crazy whenever I have to make an important decision?
posted by Chenko on Sep 29, 2011 - 28 answers

Military attitudes toward decision-making

How do military attitudes about decision-making differ from civilian ones? [more inside]
posted by stebulus on Sep 19, 2011 - 13 answers

Is this normal, or a sign my relationship is failing?

My boyfriend thinks about being with other women. I don't mean sexually. Is this normal? [more inside]
posted by metaphorik on Sep 16, 2011 - 31 answers

How companies make decisions

I'm researching how the ways companies make decisions can help individuals make decisions. Can you think of examples of famous companies making a radical, transformative decision in the last 10 years? [more inside]
posted by Marzipan on Sep 16, 2011 - 24 answers

Doubts about a breakup, what should I do?

I need your experience and advice on a break-up issue. Please read my way too long post. Thanks [more inside]
posted by dude22 on Sep 13, 2011 - 21 answers

How soon would you go?

How acceptable would you find this situation if you were renting? [more inside]
posted by Slackermagee on Jun 28, 2011 - 20 answers

What are little things I can do each day to lower the amount in which I care what people think of me?

What are little things I can do each day to lower the amount in which I care what people think of me? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 25, 2011 - 25 answers

Would you want to know if your partner has doubts, or is ignorance bliss?

If you are in a relationship and there are difficulties, should you tell the other person that you are thinking about breaking up, or should you wait until you're *sure* you want to break up to mention it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 8, 2011 - 26 answers

How do I stick with a name I'm choosing for myself?

My parents gave me a hard-to-pronounce name, and when I got to grade school my classmates started calling me something similiar for pronunciation ease. I picked a new name for myself in Highschool, but I haven't been able to stick to any name since then. How do I stick to whichever name I choose? [more inside]
posted by Autumn on Feb 22, 2011 - 29 answers

Does a stitch in time always save enough?

What metric can I use to decide whether and when to do will-save-time-in-the-future type tasks? [more inside]
posted by piato on Jan 20, 2011 - 8 answers

How best to assume more control in a LLC?

How best to assume more control than the other members of an LLC? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 9, 2010 - 8 answers

I always heard that you should stay in school....

[Grad School Filter] Help me sort through my mid-semester slump. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 21, 2010 - 10 answers

How to stay friends with both people in a break-up

How do I avoid alienating either of two friends who just broke up? I have to pull out of attending an event with one of them, so do I mention that it's because I'll be attending with the other, or say nothing about why, and risk running into them there? [more inside]
posted by lollusc on Sep 22, 2010 - 13 answers

Help me not be an anxious wreck. I can't stand myself.

Decision-making frenzy. Help me not to drive myself and others crazy. Specific situation and long-term problem inside. [more inside]
posted by 3491again on Aug 26, 2010 - 18 answers

Making decisions. Follow this simple method...

What tips and tricks do you use to work out what you really want for your future? [more inside]
posted by Neonshock on Jul 4, 2010 - 21 answers

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