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697 posts tagged with death.
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How do I honour my friend?

My friend died last week. We had been living in different countries for the past few months; we were still in contact up until a few weeks ago. His death was sudden and unexpected. He was far too young to die. I can't go to any of the memorials (he was one of those people who knew like, thousands of people, so people seemingly everywhere on earth are doing stuff) and I won't be going to the funeral. I didn't know his family and even though we were roommates, we had very few friends in common. [more inside]
posted by Enchanting Grasshopper on Feb 27, 2013 - 18 answers

How did you let go and forgive after a loss and a breakup?

Death of a parent and a breakup- how to disentangle the two, get a virtual lobotomy regarding the breakup, and for heavens sake just fucking move on regarding the breakup. [more inside]
posted by xm on Feb 27, 2013 - 20 answers

What to say to a dying relative with a fractured relationship?

My uncle is dying - the doctor says days or weeks. I haven't said anything to him, or his wife, or his kids, since they got the cancer diagnosis a few months ago. Our families have had a historically fractured relationship, so it all feels very awkward to me. Please help me figure out what to appropriately say to them. [more inside]
posted by raztaj on Feb 25, 2013 - 10 answers

James Bond, women, fleeing death

How many times has James Bond used a woman's body to prevent himself from getting killed (blocked a bullet from hitting him with a woman, etc)?
posted by aaanastasia on Feb 24, 2013 - 13 answers

My wife died. Is it OK if I *don't* want to talk about it all the time?

My wife died. Everyone keeps telling me I should have someone to talk to - a counselor or someone from hospice or whoever. I don't really feel like I need or want that, though. Am I harming myself by handling this on my own? [more inside]
posted by tylerkaraszewski on Feb 17, 2013 - 67 answers

Recurring dream

I keep having the same dream over and over. Has anyone else had this? [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on Feb 15, 2013 - 18 answers

Dealing with family when someone is dying

It appears my Dad is in the process of dying - I'm mostly okay with that, but really struggling with the rest of my family. Could use some words of wisdom. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 12, 2013 - 21 answers

What Should Be In A Fully-Wired Twenty-Something's Will?

Recently, several friends and acquaintances in their 20s have passed away. Their online accounts -- particularly their Facebook accounts -- linger, as memento mori, covered with "miss u" wall posts and that sort of thing. Which has got me thinking about what will happen when people who are now in their 20s and early 30s die. Especially if they die young. [more inside]
posted by Miss T.Horn on Feb 11, 2013 - 8 answers

How do (or should I) find out how a classmate died?

Someone I went to high school with died a year or so ago. I never learned what the cause of death was, and I'm curious. I drive by an adopt a highway sign dedicated to their memory often, and it confuses and bums me out. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 11, 2013 - 28 answers

Fiction: Fatal encounters between therapist and patient

I am looking for any stories that include a fatal encounter between a therapist and his/her patient. [more inside]
posted by 99percentfake on Feb 5, 2013 - 33 answers

That's no moon

Help me create the perfect Death Star ice sphere. [more inside]
posted by Diskeater on Jan 29, 2013 - 16 answers

my father's last wish

My father has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. He cannot receive treatment or transplant. My father is going to die in 4-8 months. On new year's eve I got engaged and now my father wants me to get married soon. March soon so he can walk me down the aisle and maybe even dance with me. [more inside]
posted by octomato on Jan 21, 2013 - 21 answers

How to be compassionate in an emergency

My partner's mother is on death's door and I'm struggling to find the words to be supportive as I should without being vapid and trite. He's making difficult decisions about life support against his mother's wishes, etc. An illness of my own has me bedridden and unable to be at his side. Any advice on what to say/what not to say to comfort/console/support him given the circumstances would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
posted by blue t-shirt on Jan 18, 2013 - 14 answers

Spoiler filter - novels/scripts where the protagonist was in a coma/dead

Spoiler filter - novels/scripts where the protagonist was in a coma/dead (etc) the whole time? [more inside]
posted by tzb on Jan 18, 2013 - 46 answers

I'd like to give something to my cat sitter in a horrible situation.

My cat has died, which was horrible. Worse, I wasn't even home. I'd like to send my cat sitter something. [more inside]
posted by AmandaA on Jan 8, 2013 - 9 answers

How to survive the death of father and a divorce?

My dad died a few days before Thanksgiving and my wife just left me (2 days after my birthday) and wants a divorce. Best survival tips? [more inside]
posted by entropicamericana on Jan 7, 2013 - 37 answers

"Dogs' lives are too short... Their only fault, really."

I love my dog. Every once in a while, I feel utterly heartbroken that I will most likely outlive him. While it doesn't happen often and it's not overwhelming, and I realize that it is perfectly natural to be sad about something like that, can you give me advice about how to turn these thoughts into something positive? [more inside]
posted by halogen on Jan 7, 2013 - 42 answers

Life insurance for dummies question

Mid thirties married male with no kids yet. Thinking about life insurance in case I do something stupid and die. Am I better off getting a term life insurance policy, a lifetime policy, or should I just take $100 a month and invest it on my own and use that for my wife if I suddenly kick the bucket? [more inside]
posted by wile e on Jan 6, 2013 - 10 answers

It's the small blue journal in my second desk drawer down

If you keep a diary or other secret papers, do you have a plan for what happens to it if something happens to you? [more inside]
posted by dawkins_7 on Jan 5, 2013 - 25 answers

I want a long life!!!

Do tall people die sooner? [more inside]
posted by Thanquol180 on Dec 23, 2012 - 15 answers

Helping a family member of the 1st anniversary of their spouse's death

My mother and father were married over 50 years. Dad passed early this year (Feb) and now is the 1st anniversary is upon us. I have been helping mom out quite a bit since then, but could use some pointers about what to do or look out for over the next couple of months. A little more inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 16, 2012 - 6 answers

Work to get in, work to get out.

Labor of death much like the labor of being born? [more inside]
posted by itsacover on Dec 16, 2012 - 5 answers

Too sad for a witty title

My grandad passed away today. My family have asked me to find a poem he might like, to read at his funeral. He was an engineer who would only read 'factual' things, such as instructional/educational books and later in life, a lot of biographies. He didn't go in for poetry at all that I know of. Would like to avoid 'Do not stand at my grave and cry'. Any reccommendations? [more inside]
posted by everydayanewday on Dec 13, 2012 - 27 answers

It's not me, it's actually you.

Am I being friend-dumped? (small wall of text and some itty bitty snowflakes) [more inside]
posted by sockorama on Dec 12, 2012 - 49 answers

No light at the end?

Have you ever not only been unable to see the light and the end of the tunnel, and don't care anymore if you do? [more inside]
posted by thelastgirl on Dec 11, 2012 - 20 answers

COBRA coverage for someone who has already died

What do I do when a person is eligible for COBRA insurance but has passed away before getting papers and signing up? [more inside]
posted by meowzilla on Dec 8, 2012 - 4 answers

Just because people are nice to you doesn't mean they have your best interests in mind

Friend of a friend's mother just passed away, and between the death and the funeral, the mom's sketchy neighbor talked him into selling his car for pennies on the dollar. What now? [more inside]
posted by davejay on Dec 6, 2012 - 7 answers

Tell the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?

Is it wrong for me to share details about a deceased ex-boyfriend with his parents? Specifically, that he was my boyfriend at all. Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 5, 2012 - 38 answers

How much extra safety would a crash helmet offer a highway driver wearing a seatbelt?

How much extra safety would a crash helmet offer a highway driver wearing a seatbelt? [more inside]
posted by Egg Shen on Dec 5, 2012 - 16 answers

Or, how to be supportive without being super annoying?

My husband is losing his father in a few weeks. He is currently spending some time with him at a hospice and is away from home to deal with chaotic family issues surrounding this. When he returns, I imagine he will need time to decompress and I want to make that easy. Please give me suggestions on how I can make that easier for him or what you've appreciated in a similar situation.
posted by dean winchester on Dec 3, 2012 - 10 answers

How to help a parent cope with the loss of a spouse?

I lost my dear dad unexpectedly Sunday after a series of illnesses. My mom, luckily, is still with us. They were together 54 years and my mom was only 17 when they met. The most important thing to my dad was my mom's well-being and I feel it is now my duty to look after her to the best of my ability. I have no idea how to help her cope with the loss of my father. I want to be there for her as much as possible, but I don't want to smother her. Does anyone have any advice?
posted by entropicamericana on Nov 23, 2012 - 18 answers

In lieu of flowers?

Wrongful death in the family. In lieu of flowers / Memorial donations? Help me, hive mind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 23, 2012 - 17 answers

To send condolences or not?

My ex-boyfriend's dad just passed away. What, if anything, should I do? [more inside]
posted by csox on Nov 16, 2012 - 24 answers

Bitter aftertaste in apple butter?

I just made a large batch of apple butter (~8 pecks) in a giant uncoated copper kettle, cooked on top of a wood fire for the better part of the day. The texture is great, but there is a bitter aftertaste (stronger in some parts, like those from the side of the pot, than others) that slightly worries me — what could have caused it, and is it plausibly safe to eat? [more inside]
posted by caaaaaam on Nov 10, 2012 - 9 answers

Closed casket, closed records?

failover in adoption records opening requests: what happens if a party is deceased? [more inside]
posted by mwhybark on Oct 22, 2012 - 7 answers

How can I help after a death in the family?

The mother of the family I work for just passed away after a long illness. What can I do to help? [more inside]
posted by nonasuch on Oct 18, 2012 - 9 answers

How to explain mortality to a 4 year-old

How to explain mortality to a 4 year-old. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 13, 2012 - 15 answers

The Final Journey

Help me explain death to my 9 year old. [more inside]
posted by plinth on Sep 20, 2012 - 17 answers

Name some examples of humorous tragedies in film and literature

I need suggestions of fictional or non-fictional books or films that deal with illness or dying in relation to humor/the absurd. [more inside]
posted by Felicity Rilke on Sep 19, 2012 - 23 answers

Death is away.

Hypothetical (I'm writing a story): is it okay/normal for someone to visit a cemetery and mourn, even if their loved-one wasn't buried there? [more inside]
posted by Trexsock on Sep 12, 2012 - 44 answers

The woods are lovely, dark and deep

In Ontario, can a person be buried in a natural way, so that the body returns to the earth? [more inside]
posted by pseudostrabismus on Sep 4, 2012 - 8 answers

Waiting, waiting, waiting....

My mother is going to die, probably very soon. How do I deal with waiting for it to happen? [more inside]
posted by heurtebise on Aug 27, 2012 - 28 answers

Help me support my dad after the death of both his parents.

My father's parents just passed away, two weeks apart exactly. How do I support my dad through this time? [more inside]
posted by dil.emma on Aug 22, 2012 - 8 answers

Songs/Poems/Writing (brief) done by people near the end of their life, especially those who knew it was near their death.

We have a venue and put on a monthly variety show. Up until now there hasn't really been a theme, just lot's of variety. I'd like to focus one of these on Songs/Poems/brief writings that were done by people who were dying and knew it. I think Freddy Mercury did a few songs celebrating life, I know that Warren Zevon did. Anything you can give me would be appreciated. And it doesn't really have to be celebratory.
posted by kenaldo on Aug 15, 2012 - 7 answers

I can't think of one, I'm exhausted

My 90 year old grandmother is barely conscious, rarely eating, and is losing her mental faculties. I visit her every lunchtime to try and get her to eat. My mother (her daughter) takes the evening shift for dinnertime. I'm not coping well. Any suggestions to help me make this easier, so I'm not sobbing my heart out every day? [more inside]
posted by malibustacey9999 on Aug 14, 2012 - 41 answers

How can we help our son know his father?

My husband has a few more months before cancer takes his energy, and then his life. We have a 17 month old son. My husband plans to write some letters to our son, but beyond that, I am not sure what to do to help my son know his father. Any ideas? [more inside]
posted by Mozzie on Aug 13, 2012 - 62 answers

How can I stop traumatic flashbacks linked to my pet's death?

My pet died suddenly. How can I stop traumatic flashbacks and focus on happy memories? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 1, 2012 - 26 answers

How long is too long to use major life trauma as an excuse?

How long is too long to use major life trauma as an excuse for everything in my life falling apart? [more inside]
posted by Cat Pie Hurts on Aug 1, 2012 - 39 answers

How to handle estranged father's funeral?

My estranged father passed away last Sunday. I've decided to attend the funeral. Please help me conduct myself with something resembling grace. Overly complex snowflakey stuff inside. [more inside]
posted by Ephelump Jockey on Jul 31, 2012 - 23 answers

How can we get people to tell us stories about my mother-in-law?

My (beloved) mother-in-law died after a year with lung cancer and we will be having a big memorial for her this weekend. What can we do to capture stories and memories from her family and friends? [more inside]
posted by Alison on Jul 31, 2012 - 7 answers

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