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Before antibiotics, was every infection fatal ?

A hundred years ago, if you had an infection that we would today treat with antibiotics, what was the typical prognosis ? Death ? [more inside]
posted by k5.user on Jul 1, 2013 - 20 answers

 

Help me live well while my father slowly dies...

My father was given a terminal diagnosis almost a decade ago. I am so lucky that he is still here. But I'm exhausted from living with the specter of his imminent death all these years. And I feel like I've been missing out on living my own life. How do I find more space for myself, even as I try to cherish the time I have with him (which now does seem to be running short)? [more inside]
posted by zahava on Jun 30, 2013 - 12 answers

My sister's super stole her laptop. What do I do?

My sister's laptop was taken by the super after she died. The locks were changed and he was the only person who was in and out of the apartment. Two days after she died someone started using the laptop. They used it on and off for two weeks and then it was returned to the apartment 1 day before I arrived to clean the place out. It was, 1 day before I returned, destroyed by submerging in water. [more inside]
posted by creiszhanson on Jun 27, 2013 - 29 answers

I Can't Get Over the Death of My Birdie. What do I do now?

My parrot Scooby died a week ago. I am still in a horrible state of mourning. My wife is over it. She keeps telling me to get over it too. YANMT. What can I do to move on? I loved Scooby so very much. I have to force myself to eat every day. I've been drinking a lot. I can't stop thinking about her and what she was like and did. I dream about her death every night. I think it's affecting my physical health.
posted by Splunge on Jun 12, 2013 - 47 answers

What to do with this body?

Let's say you drop-in to visit an older loved one, and find them dead... [more inside]
posted by Thorzdad on May 22, 2013 - 28 answers

Icky karma germs in the ocean?

Yesterday the body of a surfer was found naked and nibbled by sharks at my daily surf spot. While surfing today in the exact vicinity I couldn't shake the feeling parts of his body, both physically and meta-physically were still 'there'. Have one science and one karma question about this: [more inside]
posted by remlapm on May 10, 2013 - 24 answers

Light My Fire

I want to be cremated by bonfire. Public bonfire. I assume it's not permitted. Are there any exceptions? [more inside]
posted by shew on May 8, 2013 - 21 answers

Explaining difficult topics to a toddler.

I have a 2 and half year old toddler (and another munchkin on the way.) He's getting to the point where he's starting to ask questions about my parents and my wife's parents and we're not quite sure how to tackle the topic. [more inside]
posted by Jacob G on May 5, 2013 - 27 answers

Now what?

The story: wife gets breast cancer. Double mastectomy, chemo, radiation. Two young kids. Nine years of remission. Then, recurrence. Three years of more chemo, then three months of hospice and she dies at home in my arms. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 30, 2013 - 39 answers

How to help a grieving student?

I am a (new) professor at a small, rural university. One of my students has had to take an emergency leave due to a death in their family. Aside from assuring them that they need not think about their schoolwork at all, and that we'll work it out when they're ready, is there anything else I can do to support them? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 26, 2013 - 19 answers

Supporting Oneself with Freelance News Photography: Possible??

It's looking like I'll be jobless this summer. Would it be possible to keep myself alive by taking photos of newsworthy events and selling them to news organizations? [more inside]
posted by Sheila Nagig on Apr 25, 2013 - 8 answers

is this a well-documented scam?

Two people hit it off online. within the span of 24 hours, one of them gets her assistant to contact the other to organise meet-up details, claims that cars are booked for travel and that their airfare is booked - and then suddenly has died from being hit by a car. Is this a well-documented scam? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Apr 20, 2013 - 31 answers

Family Drama -- Aunt revisited

I wrote this question about my Aunt. As it turned out, I just wrote back a very polite reply -- "thank you for your good wishes" ...I was polite. I felt good about this. Thank you for all the helpful answers. My Aunt wrote me again -- long story inside. Thank you for taking the time to read it. [more inside]
posted by Lescha on Mar 26, 2013 - 26 answers

Authorization for cremation?

Can signing an 'Authorization For Cremation' form somehow make me responsible for my deceased father's debt? [more inside]
posted by KevinSkomsvold on Mar 25, 2013 - 15 answers

What was the most comforting condolence sentence you ever heard?

Has someone important to you passed away? What was the most comforting/most respectful thing anyone said to you when that happened? I work with the elderly, who die at an accelerated rate. 98% of the time, I genuinely care about the deceased and would like to give comfort to the surviving family. Since this comes up a lot, I feel as if I'm repeating the same phrases over and over. I need more options. I'm specifically asking for things people said to you that were kind. [more inside]
posted by Lately Gone on Mar 21, 2013 - 79 answers

My thoughts about death have started making me afraid to live.

For the last 6 or 7 days, I've been fixated on death, and not in a suicidal context. How do people normally handle constant thoughts about their mortality, and how can I stop this from crippling my ability to "live?" [more inside]
posted by Ashen on Mar 19, 2013 - 45 answers

Advance Health Care Directive - End-of-life decisions - How do I decide?

Recently I had a California Advance Health Care Directive drawn up (free when you buy a Will!) Whoa... this is a tough question! End of Life Decision: A) Choice not to prolong life B) Choice to prolong life Which one should I pick? How do I go about picking one? More details inside [more inside]
posted by StrictlyVague on Mar 7, 2013 - 14 answers

How do I honour my friend?

My friend died last week. We had been living in different countries for the past few months; we were still in contact up until a few weeks ago. His death was sudden and unexpected. He was far too young to die. I can't go to any of the memorials (he was one of those people who knew like, thousands of people, so people seemingly everywhere on earth are doing stuff) and I won't be going to the funeral. I didn't know his family and even though we were roommates, we had very few friends in common. [more inside]
posted by Enchanting Grasshopper on Feb 27, 2013 - 18 answers

How did you let go and forgive after a loss and a breakup?

Death of a parent and a breakup- how to disentangle the two, get a virtual lobotomy regarding the breakup, and for heavens sake just fucking move on regarding the breakup. [more inside]
posted by xm on Feb 27, 2013 - 20 answers

What to say to a dying relative with a fractured relationship?

My uncle is dying - the doctor says days or weeks. I haven't said anything to him, or his wife, or his kids, since they got the cancer diagnosis a few months ago. Our families have had a historically fractured relationship, so it all feels very awkward to me. Please help me figure out what to appropriately say to them. [more inside]
posted by raztaj on Feb 25, 2013 - 10 answers

James Bond, women, fleeing death

How many times has James Bond used a woman's body to prevent himself from getting killed (blocked a bullet from hitting him with a woman, etc)?
posted by aaanastasia on Feb 24, 2013 - 13 answers

My wife died. Is it OK if I *don't* want to talk about it all the time?

My wife died. Everyone keeps telling me I should have someone to talk to - a counselor or someone from hospice or whoever. I don't really feel like I need or want that, though. Am I harming myself by handling this on my own? [more inside]
posted by tylerkaraszewski on Feb 17, 2013 - 67 answers

Recurring dream

I keep having the same dream over and over. Has anyone else had this? [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on Feb 15, 2013 - 18 answers

Dealing with family when someone is dying

It appears my Dad is in the process of dying - I'm mostly okay with that, but really struggling with the rest of my family. Could use some words of wisdom. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 12, 2013 - 21 answers

What Should Be In A Fully-Wired Twenty-Something's Will?

Recently, several friends and acquaintances in their 20s have passed away. Their online accounts -- particularly their Facebook accounts -- linger, as memento mori, covered with "miss u" wall posts and that sort of thing. Which has got me thinking about what will happen when people who are now in their 20s and early 30s die. Especially if they die young. [more inside]
posted by Miss T.Horn on Feb 11, 2013 - 8 answers

How do (or should I) find out how a classmate died?

Someone I went to high school with died a year or so ago. I never learned what the cause of death was, and I'm curious. I drive by an adopt a highway sign dedicated to their memory often, and it confuses and bums me out. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 11, 2013 - 28 answers

Fiction: Fatal encounters between therapist and patient

I am looking for any stories that include a fatal encounter between a therapist and his/her patient. [more inside]
posted by 99percentfake on Feb 5, 2013 - 33 answers

That's no moon

Help me create the perfect Death Star ice sphere. [more inside]
posted by Diskeater on Jan 29, 2013 - 16 answers

my father's last wish

My father has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. He cannot receive treatment or transplant. My father is going to die in 4-8 months. On new year's eve I got engaged and now my father wants me to get married soon. March soon so he can walk me down the aisle and maybe even dance with me. [more inside]
posted by octomato on Jan 21, 2013 - 21 answers

How to be compassionate in an emergency

My partner's mother is on death's door and I'm struggling to find the words to be supportive as I should without being vapid and trite. He's making difficult decisions about life support against his mother's wishes, etc. An illness of my own has me bedridden and unable to be at his side. Any advice on what to say/what not to say to comfort/console/support him given the circumstances would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
posted by blue t-shirt on Jan 18, 2013 - 14 answers

Spoiler filter - novels/scripts where the protagonist was in a coma/dead

Spoiler filter - novels/scripts where the protagonist was in a coma/dead (etc) the whole time? [more inside]
posted by tzb on Jan 18, 2013 - 46 answers

I'd like to give something to my cat sitter in a horrible situation.

My cat has died, which was horrible. Worse, I wasn't even home. I'd like to send my cat sitter something. [more inside]
posted by AmandaA on Jan 8, 2013 - 9 answers

How to survive the death of father and a divorce?

My dad died a few days before Thanksgiving and my wife just left me (2 days after my birthday) and wants a divorce. Best survival tips? [more inside]
posted by entropicamericana on Jan 7, 2013 - 37 answers

"Dogs' lives are too short... Their only fault, really."

I love my dog. Every once in a while, I feel utterly heartbroken that I will most likely outlive him. While it doesn't happen often and it's not overwhelming, and I realize that it is perfectly natural to be sad about something like that, can you give me advice about how to turn these thoughts into something positive? [more inside]
posted by halogen on Jan 7, 2013 - 42 answers

Life insurance for dummies question

Mid thirties married male with no kids yet. Thinking about life insurance in case I do something stupid and die. Am I better off getting a term life insurance policy, a lifetime policy, or should I just take $100 a month and invest it on my own and use that for my wife if I suddenly kick the bucket? [more inside]
posted by wile e on Jan 6, 2013 - 10 answers

It's the small blue journal in my second desk drawer down

If you keep a diary or other secret papers, do you have a plan for what happens to it if something happens to you? [more inside]
posted by dawkins_7 on Jan 5, 2013 - 25 answers

I want a long life!!!

Do tall people die sooner? [more inside]
posted by Thanquol180 on Dec 23, 2012 - 15 answers

Helping a family member of the 1st anniversary of their spouse's death

My mother and father were married over 50 years. Dad passed early this year (Feb) and now is the 1st anniversary is upon us. I have been helping mom out quite a bit since then, but could use some pointers about what to do or look out for over the next couple of months. A little more inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 16, 2012 - 6 answers

Work to get in, work to get out.

Labor of death much like the labor of being born? [more inside]
posted by itsacover on Dec 16, 2012 - 5 answers

Too sad for a witty title

My grandad passed away today. My family have asked me to find a poem he might like, to read at his funeral. He was an engineer who would only read 'factual' things, such as instructional/educational books and later in life, a lot of biographies. He didn't go in for poetry at all that I know of. Would like to avoid 'Do not stand at my grave and cry'. Any reccommendations? [more inside]
posted by everydayanewday on Dec 13, 2012 - 27 answers

It's not me, it's actually you.

Am I being friend-dumped? (small wall of text and some itty bitty snowflakes) [more inside]
posted by sockorama on Dec 12, 2012 - 49 answers

No light at the end?

Have you ever not only been unable to see the light and the end of the tunnel, and don't care anymore if you do? [more inside]
posted by thelastgirl on Dec 11, 2012 - 20 answers

COBRA coverage for someone who has already died

What do I do when a person is eligible for COBRA insurance but has passed away before getting papers and signing up? [more inside]
posted by meowzilla on Dec 8, 2012 - 4 answers

Just because people are nice to you doesn't mean they have your best interests in mind

Friend of a friend's mother just passed away, and between the death and the funeral, the mom's sketchy neighbor talked him into selling his car for pennies on the dollar. What now? [more inside]
posted by davejay on Dec 6, 2012 - 7 answers

Tell the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?

Is it wrong for me to share details about a deceased ex-boyfriend with his parents? Specifically, that he was my boyfriend at all. Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 5, 2012 - 38 answers

How much extra safety would a crash helmet offer a highway driver wearing a seatbelt?

How much extra safety would a crash helmet offer a highway driver wearing a seatbelt? [more inside]
posted by Egg Shen on Dec 5, 2012 - 16 answers

Or, how to be supportive without being super annoying?

My husband is losing his father in a few weeks. He is currently spending some time with him at a hospice and is away from home to deal with chaotic family issues surrounding this. When he returns, I imagine he will need time to decompress and I want to make that easy. Please give me suggestions on how I can make that easier for him or what you've appreciated in a similar situation.
posted by dean winchester on Dec 3, 2012 - 10 answers

How to help a parent cope with the loss of a spouse?

I lost my dear dad unexpectedly Sunday after a series of illnesses. My mom, luckily, is still with us. They were together 54 years and my mom was only 17 when they met. The most important thing to my dad was my mom's well-being and I feel it is now my duty to look after her to the best of my ability. I have no idea how to help her cope with the loss of my father. I want to be there for her as much as possible, but I don't want to smother her. Does anyone have any advice?
posted by entropicamericana on Nov 23, 2012 - 18 answers

In lieu of flowers?

Wrongful death in the family. In lieu of flowers / Memorial donations? Help me, hive mind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 23, 2012 - 17 answers

To send condolences or not?

My ex-boyfriend's dad just passed away. What, if anything, should I do? [more inside]
posted by csox on Nov 16, 2012 - 24 answers

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