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How to get out of this?

For the last 6 months, I have been involved in and online "thing". I think it's time to cut this off. Most effective way? [more inside]
posted by sabina_r on Sep 3, 2013 - 14 answers

hurting over past relationship now more than when the break up happened

I feel like I'm going backwards with the break up over my past relationship which occured over six months ago. I was fine for months afterwards and, in the past couple of weeks, I've been feeling increasingly guilty over my behaviour toward my depressed ex and it hurts to think about memories together and him in general much more than it used to. Is it normal, could it be because our one year anniversary would have been in a few days? Why is it happening, when I feel like I care more about my current bf than I did him? Am I betraying him? What should I do? [more inside]
posted by opalshards on Sep 3, 2013 - 5 answers

How to ask out a coworker?

How to/Should I ask my coworker, who may not even know my name, out on a date? [more inside]
posted by Robocat on Aug 31, 2013 - 22 answers

He's the one who made things awkward, so why do I feel like a jerk?

A co-worker/friend drunkenly confessed romantic feelings; I reciprocated; now he’s acting cold to me. Do I try to clear the air? Or let it go? [more inside]
posted by gimleteye on Aug 30, 2013 - 21 answers

I'm dating-challenged and dropped the ball. How I do pick it back up?

Over last weekend I spent a whole bunch of time with a lovely woman--dinners, picnics, walks, wine under the stars etc. These weren't explicitly dates, but it all seemed pretty romantic. At the end of the evening on Saturday and Sunday we had these awkward pauses when my insecurities and my desire to--give a goodnight kiss? Express my attraction? Or something--were warring. I don't know what she was thinking but it was awkward on both sides. Now I won't see her for a month. Do I email her and explicitly say that I'm interested? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 26, 2013 - 25 answers

Metal case for dental floss?

Looking for a vendor to make me a metal case for a pack of floss as a gag gift. Importantly, it is for a new beau. Thanks in advance! [more inside]
posted by pearl228 on Aug 26, 2013 - 8 answers

Should I stay... Or really, how should I go?

How do I navigate a breakup with this woman who I respect and love, in a way that might encourage her to get better and find some happiness? Or should I even break up with her, given the potential good things that might come along if she did process through some of her stuff? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 25, 2013 - 32 answers

Are my expectations out of whack? Is this guy a jerk?

I've been very casually involved with a guy for the past couple of weeks. I am not a subscriber to the "He's Just Not That Into You" theory for a variety of reasons, but my patience is running thin and I could use a little outside perspective. How do you know if a genuinely busy dude is blowing you off? How do I bring this up if/when I see him this weekend? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 23, 2013 - 40 answers

Too much, too soon?

After a painful breakup, I'm slowwwwly trying to ease back into the dating world. I met a guy online last week...he's a few years older than me, never married, no kids but has been in several long-term relationships. We just started talking on the phone 3 days ago. Since then he's called me every night, and we have plans to meet this weekend. My issue is this: he's currently going through a trying situation; one of his parents in very sick and the doctors have said it's best for the rest of the family to fly in. Things are looking grim. He texts me updates on the situation; he's apologized for laying this on me since we haven't met yet but says he likes talking to me. I'm not sure how I feel about this....I feel very bad for him but the fact is, we don't know each other. I'm not sure how to respond other than, "hope things turn out ok." Considering his parent might die, I feel terrible but I also feel this is too heavy for "us" to be dealing with since there is no "us"....should I tell him maybe we should postpone meeting until his crisis has passed? I've gently suggested he should stick with his family/friends during this time and replied that he will but that he hopes we can still communicate. What to do?
posted by kribensa on Aug 22, 2013 - 24 answers

Can't live like this...

If social media and crowdsourcing is good for anything, I figure it's to find some sort of answer to questions like these. Here goes nothing... I'm a 23 year old with cerebral palsy and while I'm very much a special snowflake in that I've been gifted with normal function as far as most of my life is concerned-most importantly in terms of intellect- there's one part of my CP that's made my life smaller and more miserable than any wheelchair could. It's affected my relationships with and opportunities for friends, dates and jobs, and for a richer life in general. Help me find a way out. Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by marsbar77 on Aug 21, 2013 - 24 answers

So I became a stalker

My ex dumped and me coldly and cruelly one day out of the blue. We lived together and talked about marriage and kids. It was my most serious relationship. One day he came from work and told me to move out in 24 hours and it's over. Then he cut me off like I never existed. This was 1.5 years ago. I still can't let go of my feelings of anger and resentment. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 21, 2013 - 48 answers

A friendly rejection

What's the friendliest way to decline future dates from someone you've been out with a few times but just aren't that into? [more inside]
posted by greta simone on Aug 18, 2013 - 14 answers

Dating, touching, "sparks", and so on... what should I be looking for?

I'm an late-20s-guy finally starting to date for the first time. Overall, I'm finding the process fun, but as someone completely new to relationships and how they form - and someone who's self-analytical to the point of over-analyzing - I feel a little uncertain as to what's expected of me, and how I should behave on the first few dates. I've found a few useful resources on the Internet, but there's a lot of creepy advice out there, and I'd like to get some feedback from real people. So: when should I expect to feel a "spark"? Do you start touching your date in small ways before you feel a connection, or do you really only do that if you feel something? And what are the expectations surrounding that first kiss? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 17, 2013 - 23 answers

A Gentle Man, Not a Girly Man

I'm a bisexual man looking to date bisexual and gay men. In the "what I'm looking for" section of my dating profile, I'm trying to describe the sort of man I'm attracted to, and I need some help. [more inside]
posted by user c on Aug 15, 2013 - 23 answers

What distinguishes a friendship from a romance?

Somebody I've known for a year rather suddenly told me that she "felt attracted" to me. We've agreed to have dinner when she gets back into town. New as I am to dating, I'm confused as to how I should proceed. [more inside]
posted by d. z. wang on Aug 13, 2013 - 20 answers

When does a casual hookup turn into dating? When does it not?

I have been seeing this guy since December about once or twice a month, and am possibly on the verge of having feelings. Trying to figure out how to reasonably navigate this. Tell me about your experiences? [more inside]
posted by anonymoosemoosemoose on Aug 13, 2013 - 9 answers

How to keep moving forward from abusive relationship

I asked these questions earlier and you were all so helpful. I am now two and a half months out of my abusive relationship. I want to continue to move forward and need your ideas and encouragement. [more inside]
posted by Rainflower on Aug 13, 2013 - 10 answers

Game vs Me

Looking for perspectives/personal stories on dating gamers. I am early 20s, he late 20s. He is smart, level headed and fun to be around. We are both employed and having other hobbies/interests to pursue outside of work and our casual dating relationship. We enjoy each other company and sex is great. There are other minor issues that we do need to work on but at the moment things are going well. This is my first time dating a gamer. He's not an addict so I am not addressing this as a red flag. I find it kinda amusing, a part of him that I don't want to change, but yep, the issue of Game Vs Me/Us time does arise.
posted by azalea on Aug 13, 2013 - 21 answers

It didn't succeed...try, try again?

So one relationship didn't work out. Is it horribly rude to resume communicating with someone else who may know or be a friend with the other person? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 12, 2013 - 9 answers

Is this limerence? Because it sucks.

Whenever I get into a romantic/sexual relationship I always start feeling obsessive. I am totally sick of it because when it kicks in, it completely obscures what's really going on in the relationship, whether good or bad. [more inside]
posted by summer sock on Aug 10, 2013 - 9 answers

Dating someone separated.

I found out that my boyfriend is technically not divorced. This (as you might imagine) has been a major source of stress for me - what it comes down to is that he and his ex are staying married for insurance reasons, but will file by the new year. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 7, 2013 - 70 answers

Is it really such a bad idea for me to date this guy?

I googled this guy and found some troublesome things. How troubled should I really be? [more inside]
posted by anonymousme on Aug 7, 2013 - 67 answers

How to deal with Indian parents when dating a Caucasian girl?

I'm Indian and I have been dating a white girl for about 2.5 months. How do I deal with my parents who only believe in marrying someone who is also Indian? I've not told them about the girl I'm dating because I do not want to deal with bad talk when the relatives and family involved. [more inside]
posted by Parh6512 on Aug 5, 2013 - 36 answers

dying alone with cats/fear of intimacy

I need to get over my fear of intimacy. I need help recognizing self-sabotaging behavior, when dealing with the opposite sex and otherwise, that is preventing me from having a grown-up healthy heterosexual relationship. [more inside]
posted by DayTripper on Aug 4, 2013 - 18 answers

Have you grown more physically attracted someone over time?

I'm not sure if my lack of physical attraction for a guy is a dealbreaker or if I should wait and see if it increases over time. [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on Aug 4, 2013 - 36 answers

Worth asking her out again? Careful! This is a coworker…

Last month I finally decided to ask a coworker out. We had often chatted briefly yet friendly at work. I felt we shared interests, concerns, and values, at least to a degree that made a low pressure date look plausible. Is her not replying to my 2nd invitation a signal to move? [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Aug 2, 2013 - 22 answers

"Can I help you find anything?" Well, now that you mention it...

There's a very cute, funny and witty librarian at my local library that I'd like to ask out. How do I best go about doing this without making it uncomfortable for her in her workplace? [more inside]
posted by Vonnegut27 on Jul 30, 2013 - 26 answers

How can I communicate with my boyfriend more effectively?

I don't know how to handle minor conflict with my boyfriend. Specifically, I don't know how to deal with myself when I do things wrong. I can't stop beating myself up in my head. [more inside]
posted by sockermom on Jul 29, 2013 - 33 answers

Online Dating Profile 101: Building a Better "About Me" Section

After taking a break from the dating scene I'm ready to make some serious attempts to find the right match. I need some help refining my "about" description so that it accurately conveys my personality but also makes it clear that I am looking for a serious relationship and not something casual. Any input you have to offer would be very much appreciated. :) [more inside]
posted by Hello Darling on Jul 28, 2013 - 22 answers

I should just pay for a sock puppet account already. Ugh!

My friend's friend wants her to set us up. I'm into another dude who I'm pretty sure is into me but who knows where that's going and blah blah blah . . . Am I crazy for not wanting to go out with my friend's friend? [more inside]
posted by ablazingsaddle on Jul 27, 2013 - 30 answers

How can I twist the truth on my dating profile to attract my ideal date?

After coming out of a long term relationship 3 years ago, I've had a few short term relationships from online dating, but generally my dates compare unfavourably to previous long term offline partners. The more attractive profiles don't respond very often to me, or I mess it up early on when they do. I am starting to wonder if I should accept my situation and settle, or alternatively if I am doing things wrong. [more inside]
posted by molloy on Jul 27, 2013 - 45 answers

How To Keep My Morale Up When I've Never Had Any Type Of Relationship

How can I cope with the weight of being single pretty much my whole life (29 years old) - it's wearing me down and killing my self esteem. A few snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 27, 2013 - 19 answers

Need awesome gift ideas for a girlfriend who is upset with me

I bought my girlfriend an accessory for her phone on amazon a few days ago and it came in the mail yesterday. So this morning, I say "I have a surprise for you!" to which she replies "is it my accessory?" I said in a sarcastic fashion naaaah of course not! I joke like this all the time. Now she had a particularly awful day today. And when I saw her this evening, I gave her the accessory and said surprise! Normally when I do this I get "the look" and she teases me. But she was really upset. Perhaps she thought my surprise was something that would make her feel better from her particularly awful day. Now it wasn't the immature upset, but more of a disappointed, you're not in touch with my feelings upset. So I'd like to do something really sweet for her and/or give her a real surprise. Something out of the box. Ideas?
posted by FireStyle on Jul 25, 2013 - 38 answers

Nurturing person signs

What are some of the initial signs that you're dating a nurturing person who loves to take care of others? [more inside]
posted by puppetsock on Jul 25, 2013 - 17 answers

How does one "date" at 42?

When do you know you're compatible emotionally, intellectually, and sexually? After a post-divorce period of saying "yes" to anyone who asked me out and then saying "yes" again to anyone who was interested in sex, I took a year off. I drank up the solitude, decided what I wanted in a companion, and started dating again recently. The thing is, I may have swung to the opposite end of the fucking readiness spectrum. I feel quite protective of my body and of my heart. I read in a mainstream woman's magazine that it generally takes 3 months before you (both) know if you're a good match for one another. What do you think? (Thank you!)
posted by bakedbeets on Jul 25, 2013 - 17 answers

Fantasy online romance

Few months back, I started talking to someone online that I have never met. Things developed from there and now all our conversations revolve around our feelings for each other. I am happy to keep this as a fantasy. Am I still going to get hurt here? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 25, 2013 - 10 answers

How to calm dog with new partner?

I recently started dating someone who has a 4-year old dog (a female terrier mix.) Every time we make out, the dog growls. She's started jumping up on me too. We're not sure how to fix this. The dog has taken obedience classes and seems a bit anxious but otherwise well-behaved. But she's been interrupting activities and freaking out when we hug and/or kiss. Help!
posted by melodykramer on Jul 24, 2013 - 11 answers

How do you know if you should continue seeing someone or not?

I went on a first date with a guy i met through a few co-workers (he's their cousin). We texted/talked for about 2 weeks before hand, and now that we've gone out i feel like my expectations were too high. He seems to already know that he likes me, and i don't really know how i feel anymore. [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Jul 22, 2013 - 51 answers

How to stay positive in dating despite MANY confusing rejections?

It seems like there might be something wrong with me that has led guys to reject me, a hetero female, a dismal number of times over the past year or so. But I'm getting discouraged because I can't seem to figure out what it is. Feeling sad, lonely, weird. [more inside]
posted by Sock of Silliness on Jul 20, 2013 - 26 answers

Hiding chronic illness from people

I have been living with chronic illness for around 10 years now. I am only able to work part time, but I look completely healthy on the outside. Nobody apart from my family knows about it. I hide it for many reasons but unfortunately this makes it unable to get really close to anyone. What to do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 17, 2013 - 20 answers

What does it look like when it's real?

I have been out of a relationship for two years and working on myself emotionally, socially, and spiritually to clear out issues and limiting beliefs I have around dating and intimacy. I am currently in individual therapy to deal with personal stuff and have recently agreed (with prompting by my therapist) to participate in group therapy specific to dating and relationships. [more inside]
posted by strelitzia on Jul 16, 2013 - 9 answers

How to do "no contact" when you can't disappear, or ask them to?

I'm a part time trainer for a very specific type of sport. I started dating someone that trains at my facility. She ended it. I fell way to hard for her, and seeing her at the facility is not helping me heal. The only way for me to get over her is no contact, but I can't quit my job (or augment my teaching schedule) or ask her to not come to the facility during times that I teach. I have already changed the times when I go to work out myself. Seeing her makes me feel like I've been punched in the gut. How do I go no contact, when there has to be some contact? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 15, 2013 - 9 answers

Where can I meet single dads (parents) for dating?

I've been trying online dating, having been a single mom for a few years now, but I'm not finding very many single dads out there. Where are they? [more inside]
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats on Jul 14, 2013 - 12 answers

First and second date within 48 hours-Money don't matter tonight?

I finally got to ask a coworker out for coffee. The meeting, I think, went down pretty well. 1 and 1/2 hour of good conversation with no awkward silences as far as I know. We had previously talked briefly several times at the workplace, and I knew we shared several interests, which I confirmed after today's mostly pleasant encounter. HOWEVER... [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Jul 12, 2013 - 17 answers

How can I get him to leave?

I am a woman in my early 30s and have had a few dates with a guy. We have not been to each other's homes yet. That is going to change tomorrow night though. I invited him over to my house and he enthusiastically accepted. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 12, 2013 - 28 answers

How to stop dating

My most recent relationship ended in disaster. After two years of dancing around each other my most recent SO decided to give "us" a try. However they broke up with me less than week later, simply because they changed their mind...I really wanted this, so I am very hurt and angry now. I was telling a close friend, and he said that he's starting to think I don't want to be happy because I really wanted to be in a relationship with someone who couldn't stay with me more than a few days. I don't want to date anymore, at least for a long time. I don't know if I can turn off the desire to date or be with someone else. I don't know how this works honestly. Any advice? (sidenote: My SO really did just change her mind...there wasn't an argument that lead the break up or anything. She has always been scared of relationships but wanted to keep me in her life, so she wanted to try dating me rather than me cut her off altogether because I wanted to move on. Oh well.)
posted by Cybria on Jul 12, 2013 - 18 answers

Blind double date

Without really meaning to, my girlfriend and I got ourselves into the position of setting up two people who don't know each other on a double date. What can we do to make it as un-weird as possible? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 11, 2013 - 16 answers

Dating while socially awkward

I'm no good at conversation. Should I bother with dating? [more inside]
posted by enigmatologist on Jul 10, 2013 - 26 answers

Can I block someone on Facebook so that I can't see *them*?

I've just discovered that the person I've been dating has been cheating on me. I found this out by looking at his FB profile (we're not 'friends') and finding that he's changed his profile pic to one of him with another woman. I want to block his FB profile so that I can't see him. Ever. I want his profile to be inaccessible to me, to stop me from checking it. Is this possible? Or should I just shut down my own profile for a while? What else can I do to make him 'dead' to me? I'm hurting really badly at the moment. I tend to obsess about things, so I need to clear him out of my life. Thanks.
posted by Salamander on Jul 6, 2013 - 13 answers

Should we really though? Really? *Squints like Larry David*

Is "We should get a drink sometime" actually a very polite rejection? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 4, 2013 - 26 answers

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