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When does a casual hookup turn into dating? When does it not?

I have been seeing this guy since December about once or twice a month, and am possibly on the verge of having feelings. Trying to figure out how to reasonably navigate this. Tell me about your experiences? [more inside]
posted by anonymoosemoosemoose on Aug 13, 2013 - 9 answers

How to keep moving forward from abusive relationship

I asked these questions earlier and you were all so helpful. I am now two and a half months out of my abusive relationship. I want to continue to move forward and need your ideas and encouragement. [more inside]
posted by Rainflower on Aug 13, 2013 - 10 answers

Game vs Me

Looking for perspectives/personal stories on dating gamers. I am early 20s, he late 20s. He is smart, level headed and fun to be around. We are both employed and having other hobbies/interests to pursue outside of work and our casual dating relationship. We enjoy each other company and sex is great. There are other minor issues that we do need to work on but at the moment things are going well. This is my first time dating a gamer. He's not an addict so I am not addressing this as a red flag. I find it kinda amusing, a part of him that I don't want to change, but yep, the issue of Game Vs Me/Us time does arise.
posted by azalea on Aug 13, 2013 - 21 answers

It didn't succeed...try, try again?

So one relationship didn't work out. Is it horribly rude to resume communicating with someone else who may know or be a friend with the other person? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 12, 2013 - 9 answers

Is this limerence? Because it sucks.

Whenever I get into a romantic/sexual relationship I always start feeling obsessive. I am totally sick of it because when it kicks in, it completely obscures what's really going on in the relationship, whether good or bad. [more inside]
posted by summer sock on Aug 10, 2013 - 9 answers

Dating someone separated.

I found out that my boyfriend is technically not divorced. This (as you might imagine) has been a major source of stress for me - what it comes down to is that he and his ex are staying married for insurance reasons, but will file by the new year. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 7, 2013 - 70 answers

Is it really such a bad idea for me to date this guy?

I googled this guy and found some troublesome things. How troubled should I really be? [more inside]
posted by anonymousme on Aug 7, 2013 - 67 answers

How to deal with Indian parents when dating a Caucasian girl?

I'm Indian and I have been dating a white girl for about 2.5 months. How do I deal with my parents who only believe in marrying someone who is also Indian? I've not told them about the girl I'm dating because I do not want to deal with bad talk when the relatives and family involved. [more inside]
posted by Parh6512 on Aug 5, 2013 - 36 answers

dying alone with cats/fear of intimacy

I need to get over my fear of intimacy. I need help recognizing self-sabotaging behavior, when dealing with the opposite sex and otherwise, that is preventing me from having a grown-up healthy heterosexual relationship. [more inside]
posted by DayTripper on Aug 4, 2013 - 18 answers

Have you grown more physically attracted someone over time?

I'm not sure if my lack of physical attraction for a guy is a dealbreaker or if I should wait and see if it increases over time. [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on Aug 4, 2013 - 36 answers

Worth asking her out again? Careful! This is a coworker…

Last month I finally decided to ask a coworker out. We had often chatted briefly yet friendly at work. I felt we shared interests, concerns, and values, at least to a degree that made a low pressure date look plausible. Is her not replying to my 2nd invitation a signal to move? [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Aug 2, 2013 - 22 answers

"Can I help you find anything?" Well, now that you mention it...

There's a very cute, funny and witty librarian at my local library that I'd like to ask out. How do I best go about doing this without making it uncomfortable for her in her workplace? [more inside]
posted by Vonnegut27 on Jul 30, 2013 - 26 answers

How can I communicate with my boyfriend more effectively?

I don't know how to handle minor conflict with my boyfriend. Specifically, I don't know how to deal with myself when I do things wrong. I can't stop beating myself up in my head. [more inside]
posted by sockermom on Jul 29, 2013 - 33 answers

Online Dating Profile 101: Building a Better "About Me" Section

After taking a break from the dating scene I'm ready to make some serious attempts to find the right match. I need some help refining my "about" description so that it accurately conveys my personality but also makes it clear that I am looking for a serious relationship and not something casual. Any input you have to offer would be very much appreciated. :) [more inside]
posted by Hello Darling on Jul 28, 2013 - 22 answers

I should just pay for a sock puppet account already. Ugh!

My friend's friend wants her to set us up. I'm into another dude who I'm pretty sure is into me but who knows where that's going and blah blah blah . . . Am I crazy for not wanting to go out with my friend's friend? [more inside]
posted by ablazingsaddle on Jul 27, 2013 - 30 answers

How can I twist the truth on my dating profile to attract my ideal date?

After coming out of a long term relationship 3 years ago, I've had a few short term relationships from online dating, but generally my dates compare unfavourably to previous long term offline partners. The more attractive profiles don't respond very often to me, or I mess it up early on when they do. I am starting to wonder if I should accept my situation and settle, or alternatively if I am doing things wrong. [more inside]
posted by molloy on Jul 27, 2013 - 45 answers

How To Keep My Morale Up When I've Never Had Any Type Of Relationship

How can I cope with the weight of being single pretty much my whole life (29 years old) - it's wearing me down and killing my self esteem. A few snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 27, 2013 - 19 answers

Need awesome gift ideas for a girlfriend who is upset with me

I bought my girlfriend an accessory for her phone on amazon a few days ago and it came in the mail yesterday. So this morning, I say "I have a surprise for you!" to which she replies "is it my accessory?" I said in a sarcastic fashion naaaah of course not! I joke like this all the time. Now she had a particularly awful day today. And when I saw her this evening, I gave her the accessory and said surprise! Normally when I do this I get "the look" and she teases me. But she was really upset. Perhaps she thought my surprise was something that would make her feel better from her particularly awful day. Now it wasn't the immature upset, but more of a disappointed, you're not in touch with my feelings upset. So I'd like to do something really sweet for her and/or give her a real surprise. Something out of the box. Ideas?
posted by FireStyle on Jul 25, 2013 - 38 answers

Nurturing person signs

What are some of the initial signs that you're dating a nurturing person who loves to take care of others? [more inside]
posted by puppetsock on Jul 25, 2013 - 17 answers

How does one "date" at 42?

When do you know you're compatible emotionally, intellectually, and sexually? After a post-divorce period of saying "yes" to anyone who asked me out and then saying "yes" again to anyone who was interested in sex, I took a year off. I drank up the solitude, decided what I wanted in a companion, and started dating again recently. The thing is, I may have swung to the opposite end of the fucking readiness spectrum. I feel quite protective of my body and of my heart. I read in a mainstream woman's magazine that it generally takes 3 months before you (both) know if you're a good match for one another. What do you think? (Thank you!)
posted by bakedbeets on Jul 25, 2013 - 17 answers

Fantasy online romance

Few months back, I started talking to someone online that I have never met. Things developed from there and now all our conversations revolve around our feelings for each other. I am happy to keep this as a fantasy. Am I still going to get hurt here? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 25, 2013 - 10 answers

How to calm dog with new partner?

I recently started dating someone who has a 4-year old dog (a female terrier mix.) Every time we make out, the dog growls. She's started jumping up on me too. We're not sure how to fix this. The dog has taken obedience classes and seems a bit anxious but otherwise well-behaved. But she's been interrupting activities and freaking out when we hug and/or kiss. Help!
posted by melodykramer on Jul 24, 2013 - 11 answers

How do you know if you should continue seeing someone or not?

I went on a first date with a guy i met through a few co-workers (he's their cousin). We texted/talked for about 2 weeks before hand, and now that we've gone out i feel like my expectations were too high. He seems to already know that he likes me, and i don't really know how i feel anymore. [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Jul 22, 2013 - 51 answers

How to stay positive in dating despite MANY confusing rejections?

It seems like there might be something wrong with me that has led guys to reject me, a hetero female, a dismal number of times over the past year or so. But I'm getting discouraged because I can't seem to figure out what it is. Feeling sad, lonely, weird. [more inside]
posted by Sock of Silliness on Jul 20, 2013 - 26 answers

Hiding chronic illness from people

I have been living with chronic illness for around 10 years now. I am only able to work part time, but I look completely healthy on the outside. Nobody apart from my family knows about it. I hide it for many reasons but unfortunately this makes it unable to get really close to anyone. What to do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 17, 2013 - 20 answers

What does it look like when it's real?

I have been out of a relationship for two years and working on myself emotionally, socially, and spiritually to clear out issues and limiting beliefs I have around dating and intimacy. I am currently in individual therapy to deal with personal stuff and have recently agreed (with prompting by my therapist) to participate in group therapy specific to dating and relationships. [more inside]
posted by strelitzia on Jul 16, 2013 - 9 answers

How to do "no contact" when you can't disappear, or ask them to?

I'm a part time trainer for a very specific type of sport. I started dating someone that trains at my facility. She ended it. I fell way to hard for her, and seeing her at the facility is not helping me heal. The only way for me to get over her is no contact, but I can't quit my job (or augment my teaching schedule) or ask her to not come to the facility during times that I teach. I have already changed the times when I go to work out myself. Seeing her makes me feel like I've been punched in the gut. How do I go no contact, when there has to be some contact? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 15, 2013 - 9 answers

Where can I meet single dads (parents) for dating?

I've been trying online dating, having been a single mom for a few years now, but I'm not finding very many single dads out there. Where are they? [more inside]
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats on Jul 14, 2013 - 12 answers

First and second date within 48 hours-Money don't matter tonight?

I finally got to ask a coworker out for coffee. The meeting, I think, went down pretty well. 1 and 1/2 hour of good conversation with no awkward silences as far as I know. We had previously talked briefly several times at the workplace, and I knew we shared several interests, which I confirmed after today's mostly pleasant encounter. HOWEVER... [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Jul 12, 2013 - 17 answers

How can I get him to leave?

I am a woman in my early 30s and have had a few dates with a guy. We have not been to each other's homes yet. That is going to change tomorrow night though. I invited him over to my house and he enthusiastically accepted. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 12, 2013 - 28 answers

How to stop dating

My most recent relationship ended in disaster. After two years of dancing around each other my most recent SO decided to give "us" a try. However they broke up with me less than week later, simply because they changed their mind...I really wanted this, so I am very hurt and angry now. I was telling a close friend, and he said that he's starting to think I don't want to be happy because I really wanted to be in a relationship with someone who couldn't stay with me more than a few days. I don't want to date anymore, at least for a long time. I don't know if I can turn off the desire to date or be with someone else. I don't know how this works honestly. Any advice? (sidenote: My SO really did just change her mind...there wasn't an argument that lead the break up or anything. She has always been scared of relationships but wanted to keep me in her life, so she wanted to try dating me rather than me cut her off altogether because I wanted to move on. Oh well.)
posted by Cybria on Jul 12, 2013 - 18 answers

Blind double date

Without really meaning to, my girlfriend and I got ourselves into the position of setting up two people who don't know each other on a double date. What can we do to make it as un-weird as possible? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 11, 2013 - 16 answers

Dating while socially awkward

I'm no good at conversation. Should I bother with dating? [more inside]
posted by enigmatologist on Jul 10, 2013 - 26 answers

Can I block someone on Facebook so that I can't see *them*?

I've just discovered that the person I've been dating has been cheating on me. I found this out by looking at his FB profile (we're not 'friends') and finding that he's changed his profile pic to one of him with another woman. I want to block his FB profile so that I can't see him. Ever. I want his profile to be inaccessible to me, to stop me from checking it. Is this possible? Or should I just shut down my own profile for a while? What else can I do to make him 'dead' to me? I'm hurting really badly at the moment. I tend to obsess about things, so I need to clear him out of my life. Thanks.
posted by Salamander on Jul 6, 2013 - 13 answers

Should we really though? Really? *Squints like Larry David*

Is "We should get a drink sometime" actually a very polite rejection? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 4, 2013 - 26 answers

shy person dating

Can you help an unexperienced, shy person figure out if I'm doing this dating thing right? [more inside]
posted by swamp rocket on Jul 4, 2013 - 14 answers

Help me not focus on my lust for a guy that's bad for me.

About a month ago, I started dating an absolutely lovely man, and I immediately called things off with my friend with benefits at the time without much in the way of closure. I'm enjoying my time with the dating guy A LOT, but the fwb is texting and calling and I feel tempted. Help me with brain hacks to let go of this lust. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 27, 2013 - 29 answers

Where should I tell online dates that I work?

I work for a well-known company and I'm never sure what to say when a guy I've met via an online dating site asks where I work. I don't feel comfortable giving this information out, just like I would never give someone my home address. Obviously 99% of the time it would be fine, but it's very easy to find my company's address, and there are some crazies out there who could conceivably show up at my office if things ever turned sour. [more inside]
posted by whitelily on Jun 24, 2013 - 47 answers

Girlfriend met a guy on dating site. This isn't settling well with me.

My girlfriend, who is lonely, used a dating site to make a "friend" which I'm having difficulty coping with. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 14, 2013 - 81 answers

Who keeps the friends after a breakup?

Is it fair to a girl I was semi-casually dating if I continue attending her church after we broke up? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 12, 2013 - 27 answers

Why do I always end up in the 'Friend Zone'?

This happens to me far too often when I've dated men, I hear the 'I like you as a friend' after a handful of dates far too often. Is there something I could be doing wrong? [more inside]
posted by bluehermit on Jun 11, 2013 - 33 answers

Is it acceptable to date multiple people at a time?

I'm in my late twenties, straight and male and I've been having a persistent problem in relationships: I like dating, and I don't like being exclusive after a month or two of dating. I also don't like spending 4-5 days a week with someone after that amount of time. What can I do and how can I set expectations while emphasizing I'm not trying to have casual sex with a lot of people? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 10, 2013 - 20 answers

Sorry OKC, I think we need to see other people

So now that IAC has ruined OKCupid what are the best alternatives? [more inside]
posted by prunes on Jun 10, 2013 - 9 answers

Date or wait?

I'm a man in his mid-twenties. I've never been in a relationship. I've never even taken anyone out on a date. I want to rectify this, but I think my mental health and my living situation prevent me from doing so. Should I even try to date? If not, what should I do? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 10, 2013 - 35 answers

meant friendship or something else?

opinion please! [more inside]
posted by MiuMiu on Jun 9, 2013 - 51 answers

What do I do about my awkward book collection?

I'm dating a nurse. I also have a collection of 400 nurse-themed romance paperbacks. When we started dating, I hid them under the bed. Can they ever come out? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 9, 2013 - 29 answers

I like to swear, take in rescue cats, and use a wheelchair. You?

What dating site should I use? Reeeeeeaal special details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 9, 2013 - 12 answers

Loneliness and OKCupid, part 2

A few weeks ago I, a hetero male in his early 30s, asked about dating and using OKCupid with some restrictions: no kids, no religion, no alcohol being the main ones. This is a follow-up to that AskMe, but going beyond OKCupid. [more inside]
posted by moonlit walk on the sun on Jun 8, 2013 - 70 answers

I know they're nice, but they're not for me!

I'm in an amazing relationship, with someone I've known for over two years, and we've been dating for a year-ish. We're both women in our early 20's. I've only dated women up to this point, and been very happy with that. It seems that my brain doesn't want to keep that status quo anymore and is trying to convince me I want to experience being with men. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 6, 2013 - 10 answers

How do I attract and date men (not boys) ?

I'm in my 30s but still feel/look/act like I'm much younger, so I tend to roll with a younger crowd and my last 3 boyfriends were all 2-4 years younger than I am. This needs to stop. [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Jun 5, 2013 - 53 answers

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