604 posts tagged with dating and relationships.
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Breakup in Same Social Circle

My girlfriend (26) broke up with me (33) out of the blue last week. To add to this, we share the same tight social circle that meets multiple times per week for different outings. I have been keeping my distance from the group so far. While I don't want to lose touch with this circle of friends, I also feel that seeing her would add to my pain and discomfort. Has anyone been in a similar situation and how did you handle it?
posted by QuietType on Jun 20, 2015 - 11 answers

How much of an explanation do I owe this guy after one date?

I went out with a guy from OKCupid who seemed awkward but raised no huge red flags. Less than a week later, he got weird and I'm no longer interested. Do I need to tell him this? [more inside]
posted by intheigloo on Jun 20, 2015 - 21 answers

Why did he not respond after our first date and what should I do?

I went on a first date with a guy I met on a dating website, we got on really well and I thought everything was great. I haven't heard from him since and now I am struggling to stop thinking about him. Any help on what I should do? [more inside]
posted by artystar on Jun 17, 2015 - 32 answers

Can People Change?

I'm with a guy who's not romantic at all and I can't stand it. He says he can change, but is that even possible? [more inside]
posted by lhude sing cuccu on Jun 15, 2015 - 21 answers

How do I find out my boyfriend's secret desires?

I'm afraid of boring my boyfriend in bed. He's a decade older and has had quite a few relationships in his past. I can't imagine he's as vanilla as he professes to be--I'm willing to do ANYTHING, and he wants missionary every time. Does he view me as too innocent for anything else? [more inside]
posted by Guinevere on Jun 15, 2015 - 29 answers

Relationship Anxiety

I am dating someone in my social circle who I've know for around 8 months. We've been dating for the last 2 months. I think she's great...smart, funny, attractive. We get along well and there is lots of chemistry. I'm happy that I've been able to find someone. Being in a relationship has brought some of my insecurities to the surface. Specifically, there's a couple areas where I could use some advice. [more inside]
posted by QuietType on Jun 10, 2015 - 18 answers

My wonderful Mr. Right sucks in bed and I don't know how to tell him

I am in love with my wonderful boyfriend of 3 months. The only problem is that he doesn't seem to care that I am not having ANY orgasms with him, he's not into oral sex (the only thing that has worked for me in the past), he's not into foreplay, he barely kisses me, and he doesn't even realize that I'm unhappy because I am too wimpy and unassertive to voice a word of complaint. He's a very macho "alpha male" old-fashioned chivalrous type and I am afraid to emasculate him by giving him directions in the bedroom or telling him that I'm not satisfied. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 3, 2015 - 55 answers

Addressing non-dealbreaker behavior in relationships

I've had issues with being assertive about my needs in past relationships, and while I've gotten a lot better, I still have trouble deciding when and how it's best to bring up things that I don't like but are not dealbreakers. I'd like help thinking this through. [more inside]
posted by deus ex machina on May 31, 2015 - 7 answers

How do I meet men now?

I'm a straight, overweight but otherwise generally considered attractive, woman in her early 40's. I got out of a LTR a year and a half ago. I am more than ready to date, but having major problems finding anyone interested :( [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 29, 2015 - 25 answers

Should I believe a 40+ man who says he doesn't believe in marriage?

I've been dating a never-married man in his early 40s for the past few months. (I'm a decade younger.) Last night he casually mentioned that he never wants to get married and would be fine with raising kids without marriage -- just as HE was raised, as the only child of an unmarried mother. I am devastated because I am falling in love with him but cannot accept this commitment-free future. Should I get out now or endeavor to change his mind down the road? [more inside]
posted by Guinevere on May 23, 2015 - 60 answers

Am I Too Fast Or Is He Too Slow? Or Both or Neither?

I recently met a man I dig, but I feel like he's being cryptic about his life. I'm not sure if I'm expecting him to open up too fast or if he is being too slow. Either way, do I cut my losses or wait and see? [more inside]
posted by mermaidcafe on May 14, 2015 - 21 answers

Why is this man who is totally out of my league pursuing me?

I dumped a guy who's totally out of my league. Now he is chasing me like there's no tomorrow. Why? And will it last? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 30, 2015 - 67 answers

Thwarting loneliness in times of trial

How can I cope with the fact that I will likely be single for the next several years? [more inside]
posted by cosmicbeast on Apr 18, 2015 - 21 answers

How do I communicate better when I'm about to, erm, get my freak on?

Exactly as it says on the tin. How do, without faking it, I be more upfront about my dating/sexual inexperience with my potential partners, and when? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 10, 2015 - 21 answers

should I feel like shit? cause I kinda feel like shit.

I am new(ish) to dating. I went on a couple of dates(?) with one person, and with another person a platonic meeting turned romantic and now I feel really guilty. Can I get some goddamn perspective, please? (other stupid complications within, obvsly. Just look what website we're on.) [more inside]
posted by FirstMateKate on Apr 9, 2015 - 13 answers

Big difference in age/experience on a first date and if something more.

So I am a 34 male and I knowingly asked a 19-20-21-ish-year-old on a coffee date. I mentioned the age difference to her when I did so. She said, "Sure." If we go on more dates after this date and/or become physically intimate, how can I minimize the chance that she will retrospectively feel preyed upon or taken advantage of in X years? [more inside]
posted by zeek321 on Apr 6, 2015 - 99 answers

What does it look like for financial values to fundamentally change?

My SO & I are in our 30’s, have been dating over a year and have been talking about marriage. We are having a crisis over our differing financial values. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 1, 2015 - 21 answers

Hallmarks of not having "done the work"?

What are the signs of someone who hasn't pursued therapy and healing and isn't ready for a relationship? [more inside]
posted by morganw on Mar 29, 2015 - 30 answers

Should I Forget Him or is There Still Something There?

This guy I met a few months ago has been sending me some very mixed signals for a very long time and I honestly don't know what to make of it. Whenever I'm just about to write him off for ghosting on me, he re-appears and it's like nothing ever happened. Anyone have any advice or tips? [more inside]
posted by lana0112 on Mar 27, 2015 - 47 answers

Should I date my opposite-sex twin or find someone who complements me?

I'm shy, unassertive, and nerdy. Should I date someone just like myself or try to find someone whose strengths are my weaknesses? [more inside]
posted by Guinevere on Mar 14, 2015 - 28 answers

Boyfriend bad juju beanplating

Dating for 6 weeks, "officially" boyfriend and girlfriend, have been spending time together most days. I've excitedly told my friends about him and invited him to a 30th and on a group holiday a few of us were going on. Last weekend he went to a farewell party on the Friday and a birthday on the Saturday without inviting me, but came to my place afterwards (on the Friday he left my house to go to the farewell party, then returned afterwards). I felt disappointed that he seemed less excited to introduce me to his friends than I did him and my gut feeling is not good. Thoughts? [more inside]
posted by lifethatihavenotlivedyet on Mar 5, 2015 - 41 answers

Websites about love and self-worth/knowledge/respect/etc

I really like this website and I was wondering if you can recommend similar ones. [more inside]
posted by divina_y_humilde on Feb 21, 2015 - 5 answers

Is this relationship worth pursuing?

I am 36 years old, female, divorced...about two months ago, I met a guy that is from Egypt and is Muslim. He has been in the U.S. for about 7 years, and is now 32 years old. We have a lot of fun together, but now lately I am questioning if a future is really possible. First of all, I was raised Catholic...I'm not really practicing now, but I don't know if I can raise my children as Muslims (and if I were to marry this guy, it is non-negotiable; the children MUST be raised Muslim). [more inside]
posted by Maggsie97 on Feb 10, 2015 - 32 answers

Teach me how to date

Is it silly not to date multiple people at a time? [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Feb 3, 2015 - 18 answers

Likable to all except single men?

Why is it so easy for me to naturally make friends but never meet guys that ask me out? I always thought that people skills in both scenarios are transferable. The only difference I can think of are looks but I don't think that's my problem. [more inside]
posted by sabina_r on Jan 28, 2015 - 27 answers

Hey, Hive Mind. Could I be dating a narcissist?

I've recently began dating a guy who's coming on pretty strong. While I want to embrace what feels like someone who truly cares after a string of emotionally distant men, I'm feeling like it's too much, too soon, and I'm getting incredibly idealized. Thoughts? [more inside]
posted by shotinthedark on Jan 28, 2015 - 37 answers

Scared of attraction.

29 year old heterosexual male. I believe that I have social anxiety when it comes to talking to women I am attracted to - perhaps more than normal. This has meant very little sex or relationships throughout my life. Practical ideas for dealing with this would be appreciated. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 25, 2015 - 18 answers

Only a loser would settle for me

I can't imagine someone choosing to date me when there are people out there who are so much more successful, competent, fit, daring, worldly, and self-assured. So if someone likes me, I assume they can't do better than me, and that's a turnoff, because I'm not so great, so THEY must not be so great either. How can I get out of this mental trap? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 24, 2015 - 39 answers

Navigating a 10 Year Age Gap While Dating

Yesterday an incredible guy messaged me on Match and I can't stop looking at his profile because he seems like such a great fit for me. The only catch is that he's 10-11 years older than I am (though still in his 30s) and that's making me very leery. Am I right to be or am I being silly? [more inside]
posted by Hermione Granger on Jan 3, 2015 - 51 answers

Post-coital repulsion

I use sex-related words in my question, so I've placed it in the extended area in case anyone is browsing at a prudish workplace. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 17 answers

I will give you space until it comes out of your ears

It's early days in our relationship yet, and I like this guy tremendously, but his communication practices are driving me up the wall. Am I being too demanding or do I have some basis for feeling neglected? more flakey snowflakeness inside [more inside]
posted by starcrust on Dec 9, 2014 - 42 answers

Dating advice for an inexperienced neurotic person

I've been using OkCupid for a few months now and have been on around 4 dates with different people. I (22) started talking to a woman (also 22) last month and we really hit it off online. We've met up twice now and had a lot of fun together (both dates were over 6 hours long) and we ended up kissing the last time we were together. At the end of the second date we talked about meeting up again, however I'm having serious doubts and anxiety. [more inside]
posted by fallingleaves on Dec 8, 2014 - 16 answers

Please help me decide if I should move back to NYC from SF

Can't decide if I should move back to NYC from SF. Please help me find some new ways to think about the problem. [more inside]
posted by apostate street preacher on Dec 4, 2014 - 27 answers

In search of red and yellow flags for new relationships

Is there something I should I be on the lookout for if I am dating a new guy with (a lot of) close female friends? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 2, 2014 - 19 answers

Do I REALLY need to take a break from dating?

I know I "should" take a break from dating, but I don't want to. Why "should" I? Snowflakery follows [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Nov 29, 2014 - 27 answers

Do sex drives ever INCREASE after 3+ years in a relationship?

My SO and I have been growing together more and more in the last three years. However, one thing seems to grow less and less, and as we move closer to thinking about marriage, I am a little concerned that our sex drives are mismatched for a very long term relationship. I am 23 and she is 21. I've heard a ton of anecdotes about women "waking up" sexually around 25. Is it realistic for me to think that that could be a possibility? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 25, 2014 - 33 answers

He didn't even want to have sex with me

My co-worker is the first guy I have been attracted to in a year and he seemed to reciprocate but then abpruptly lost interest. I can't stop obssesing over it and feeling rejected and down. [more inside]
posted by sabina_r on Nov 19, 2014 - 27 answers

Am I broken?

I used to like people, but now I don't. I fear I'm creating an irreversibly solitary life for myself. I think the problem must be me, but I'm not sure what the cure is. Looking for advice. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 16, 2014 - 73 answers

Reason to feel insecure or am I just being borderline insane?!

Argh, so here goes, my first MetFilter question. I'd love some perspective here on whether I have a reason to be as worried as I am or whether, in fact, I'm overreacting - and any tips of ways to cope and not act out self-destructively would be very good. [more inside]
posted by starstarstar on Oct 30, 2014 - 31 answers

Oops, I did it again :(

How can I forgive myself for exercising such poor judgment? [more inside]
posted by Chrysalis on Oct 28, 2014 - 25 answers

A Long Time Ago, In A Relationship Far, Far Away

When should I tell new partners about past abuse? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 23, 2014 - 11 answers

Is it possible to find dates if you're a person seeking a person?

I am potentially interested in dating again. I had a breakup of a 1.5 year relationship around this time last year and feel emotionally over it. However, I feel like I will have a bit more challenges in regards to dating than the average person. (I'm mostly asexual, not very feminine, and a non-traditional undergraduate student in a college town). Special snowflakes inside... [more inside]
posted by sevenofspades on Oct 11, 2014 - 16 answers

How do I get there from here?

I'm pretty sure I'm not ready to date, but I'd like to be ready to date. Thoughts on how to get there? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 5, 2014 - 15 answers

So, how long have you been dating?

Like many other on-again, off-again couples, my boyfriend and I are having problems answering the question, "how long have you been dating?" [more inside]
posted by SkylitDrawl on Sep 28, 2014 - 23 answers

Help me get over and move on from this disappointing non-relationship

I recently came out of a disappointing "non-relationship" and am finding it hard to move on, and to know how to deal with this person (who is someone I see regularly). Hoping someone out there may have been through a similar thing and have some wisdom for me. [more inside]
posted by ss79 on Sep 27, 2014 - 24 answers

Perspective on the idea of "growing apart" in a long term commitment?

I recently started seeing someone new, who happens to be the first person I've dated who's divorced. When he told me that he was divorced, he said they "grew apart," after over a decade of marriage, though he also indicated that his ex-wife didn't feel that way, and didn't want to get divorced. I had the sense (though this was a brief conversation, and we're just getting to know each other) that he didn't necessarily *try* to fix things. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 27, 2014 - 26 answers

Sharing relationship problems for advice with best friend

Is it okay to ever talk about relationship problems with your closest trusted friend(s) for advice or to vent? [more inside]
posted by Asian_Hunnie on Sep 16, 2014 - 23 answers

OkCupid clinic

After years I finally did a re-haul/update of my OkCupid profile. If you enjoy this sort of thing, please help me with your wisdom. My profile. [more inside]
posted by Salamandrous on Sep 8, 2014 - 34 answers

Should I go on a date with someone if I don't even want a relationship?

Is this a stupid question? Idk. I just got out of a 5 year relationship in May. I feel moved on from him but I'm still trying to put my life back together. And I don't want a relationship right now, bBut two guys have recently asked me out on dates. Idk what to say! I don't know very much about dating. I am 21. [more inside]
posted by anon1129 on Aug 27, 2014 - 15 answers

How do I... do OKCupid?

Whew. Just put up my OKC profile for the first time ever! Looking for advice and some pointers. [more inside]
posted by un petit cadeau on Aug 25, 2014 - 29 answers

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