I'm wondering what forms of online dating are most popular in the UK. I joined OKCupid but have only gotten copy-and-paste messages from creepy dudes and I get the impression that maybe this website is not as popular here as it is in the US (though I haven't used it in the US). Have dating websites become outdated? Is everyone on Tinder? Is Tinder only used for hooking up? Any thoughts or experiences with the current online dating scene would be appreciated.
I'm a woman, 49, in NYC, doing the OK Cupid. I've done online dating before, but have been out of it for quite some time, and really don't think I'm up to date. Please advise. [more inside]
In real life women don't flirt with me, smile at me in public, or glance at me when they walk past me. However, with online dating I do really well. What gives? I'm starting to suspect I'm just really photogenic and I'm a bit of a dog in real life.
I had a stalker years back and I was only able to shake them off by going virtually off grid. I had to stop dating online (because that's how he found me one of the times) and eventually I had to change my name, my home and my job and severe contacts with people I knew for years to get away from them. I would like to try online dating again, but this time maybe with a photo of someone with similar traits to mine, but not my real photo. [more inside]
Recently I've been trying some online dating. I notice though that not infrequently when I message a guy (or even when I respond to his messages to me!) he'll answer my question but no further - ie won't ask any questions in return. What is this? Should I even bother replying again at that point? [more inside]
Straight women of MetaFilter: do you message first in online dating? If not, why? [more inside]
How do I feel more confident about myself? [more inside]
So it's been awhile since I've used OKC, just reactivated the profile, and it's now past due for an overhaul. [more inside]
I'm an early 30s lesbian who spent most of her 20s in committed relationships. My latest and most significant ended about a year ago and I've started dipping my toe in the scary online dating waters. I'm not ready to get serious yet but since I've been in these long relationships, I've never really 'dated around' per se, except maybe in my very early 20s- although at the time I was pretty closeted and neurotic, so I hardly even count that. Anyway, I registered on OkCupid and messaged back and forth with a few people. Somewhat naively, I gave two of them my phone number to text. BAD IDEA. More inside.. [more inside]
I'm thinking of contacting someone I previously dated to see if he wants to date again. I know there's a good chance I won't get a positive response or will just get hurt again, but I can't help the feeling that there's some kind of unfinished business here. So I want to contact him. My questions are: (a) is trying to see if he wants to date again absolutely a bad idea? and (b) if not, how do I contact him? Do I text him and just say hello and try to gauge his response before going further? Call him out of the blue to talk? See if he wants to meet up for a drink? [more inside]
A friend was telling me last night that she is ready to start dating again, and thinks that online dating is the way to go, but she has never tried online dating and hasn't the first clue as to how to go about it. [more inside]
Sorry to continue the recent trend of OKCupid profile reviews, but I'd like more feedback on mine. [more inside]
I need some assistance in updating my okcupid profile. [more inside]
I'm a bisexual woman in my 20s, and I started online dating in January. I moved to a new country so I am totally content with meeting new people and learning more about the city through them. I also really enjoy just talking to new people in general without any expectations, but I wonder if can do something better so I can actually have something romantic? [more inside]
Just started a new account. Maybe you guys can help me out? [more inside]
Hello, I'm trying out the whole Match.com thing for the first time and am having trouble making my profile really stand out. I'm getting a little writers block as well. I've tried doing the funny thing and it just comes across as corny. I'm not fond of my writing skills and what I've put together feels it's a little flat. Let me know if anybody has any suggestions for improvement. Of course, any grammar corrections are more than welcome as well. More inside and Thanks! [more inside]
Someone who I bonded with decided we had no spark, but wants to be friends. I am having trouble dealing with being rejected and my lowered self-esteem from the rejection but I feel like he is such a special person that I want to keep him as a friend. We had an intense online relationship for three months and dated for less than 2 weeks. Reading all these posts on MetaFilter has really helped me deal better with my breakup, but I still feel a inner turmoil about how I should handle my own situation. I don't feel that I trust my judgment so...here I am. Help on the matter is appreciated or just some advice or words would help me get through this. [more inside]
Online dating (*sigh*). Two successful dates with the same guy. Is it okay to wait for him to contact me, or should I be more proactive? [more inside]
I'm looking for insight into what is a reasonably good first message to send someone on an online dating site. I've been online for a few months and still feel lost. Successful online daters please enlighten me as to how you do it! Snowflakes inside... [more inside]
So now that IAC has ruined OKCupid what are the best alternatives? [more inside]
when to expect the person you met online to stop looking and remove their profiles? [more inside]
I met a guy online and I'm interested in him. The feeling seems to be mutual, but I feel like we're stuck in an awkwardly unclear moment that leaves at least one of us (me) in limbo. How can we crawl out of this limbo and progress to something meaningful? [more inside]
I'm on OkCupd, and I've been chatting with someone who seems pretty cool and cute. We made plans to meet on Sunday, but she said she was busy but wanted to meet up later. I had a free ticket to a movie yesterday, so I asked if she wanted to come out. Again, busy, so I said "Hey, I'm free on Thursday and Sunday if you want to meet, but if not it's cool". I got a message back saying "I did want to, just got busy. Not into the attitude though so lets leave it there." The logical thing is just to leave it at that and not pursue her any more, but part of me wants to try and figure out if I can fix my mistake and at least meet up for a coffee to see if there's any chemistry there. Is it possible?
Have you (or someone you know) been successful with individuals who are a low match for you on OKC? I consider low to be below '80% Match'. This is assuming you've both answered at least a 100 questions. Success I consider to be at least a few months of going out. I'm trying to get a sense of whether it is reasonable to ignore contact from low-matching individuals or if those scores are just meaningless once you get to know someone in person. Should you give that person a shot or is it a waste of time? I'm not so much concerned with the friend or enemy score.
So I met this guy online, we recently spoke over the phone for the first time and have spoken one other time after that. First conversation was about 20 minutes and the next was maybe 10 and took place this morning. We met on the type of dating site where people are matched for long-term relationships - what I'm trying to say here is we know we're not trying to just find friends. I am trying not to waste my time here and want to get to know what he is thinking so that if we're not on the same page I can move on, preferably before my membership online ends. [more inside]
It doesn't show up in pictures. I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but don't want it to seem like I'm trying to hide something. What should I do? [more inside]
An 18-year-old girl I met online who I'm interested in dating's parents (who, I should note, are still financially supporting her) want all sorts of my info before they'll let her meet me and I believe they want it regardless if she meets me here or if I meet her there. Her parents want, among other things: My address and addresses and phone numbers of various family members of mine; scans of pieces of my ID; to check if I have a criminal record. Is it wrong of me to want to withhold this info from them? [more inside]
I met a guy through an online dating website who I like but am not attracted to. I'd like to meet with him again, but how do I manage this without leading him on? And is online dating always going to be like this? [more inside]
Don't worry, I'm not about to ask anyone 'But whyyyyy don't you like meeeee??'. I totally get that someone can be not-into-me for the colour of my t-shirt if they want: no harm, no foul. But I would like to know how much follow-up is normal after a first date, and also if anyone has any idea how I could get this so wrong? [more inside]
It's been 2 months. You have a great first date with a guy from internet. Chemistry! Romance! Sexual Attraction! Best first date ever. But the female has undesirable qualities. After a few more dates the female confronts the male about his intentions. He then calls her back in a passionate telephone call and says he's willing to have a go. Sadly, he seems to not really be that into her. He then again a few weeks later reiterates his fondness for the female, despite hang ups and she's now rethinking her position. [more inside]
Over the past 5 months, I've fallen into a deep relationship. I'm not sure where to go next and would like your thoughts. [more inside]
Proposed a long-distance "meeting" trip with someone I've been interested in dating for several months. I agreed to pay for everything but now I'm feeling awkward about the entire thing. Details inside.
Proposed a long-distance "meeting" trip with someone I've been interested in dating for several months. I agreed to pay for everything but now I'm feeling awkward about the entire thing. Details inside. [more inside]
Suggestions that may improve my OKCupid profile or conversation initiations? [more inside]
My OkCupid profile--any suggestions? And what's the best way to initiate conversations with women? [more inside]
Have you run into any 401 scammers on OKcupid? [more inside]
Dating dilemma - The type of people I want to date always seem to live in New York. I'm happy in my small town and don't want to move. How do I best approach this?
Dating dilemma - The type of people I want to date always seem to live in New York. I'm happy in my small town and don't want to move. How do I best approach this? [more inside]
Another online dating etiquette question: Is it ever acceptable to contact someone two times before hearing back from them? Or is that creepy? [more inside]
Online dating never seems to progress past the smalltalk stage. What am I doing wrong? Most men who message me never ask me out. I've sometimes done the asking, but nothing has come of it. I've had to repel a lot of unsavory advances, but other than that, I get no offers. And lately, nobody has messaged me at all. [more inside]
(TL;DR): He’s still online after 2 1/2 years. Now he’s engaged to my friend. I made the match. Do I do anything? [more inside]
What's the best way to ask for photographs from someone on an online dating site? [more inside]
Match.com-what is going on with his profile? I can send him an email BUT can not click to view his profile ;( This guy and I have been emailing bac and fourth -(would have been 3rd email from him) When I went to check my emails. Saw his default photo was taken off. I tried clicking on his profile... but I can't *when I do try* the information reads: this profile information is "Addtional profile information is not avaliable'' BUT it shows he was actie with in 24 hrs. Also, I can send him an email, as I drafted something and the email setting had no issue letting me do so. What is going on with his profile? [more inside]
Girl I am dating just admitted to me that her family was abusive and her older brother is still abusive towards her. [more inside]
Reviewing my 8 month GAY dating experiment. What is causeing me to get these results? [more inside]
Online dating advice: when they're all pretty good, how do I pick out the great ones? [more inside]
When can we have sex without me seeming to be a slut??? [more inside]
Did I do a bad thing and ruin a good thing or be assertive and stand up for myself? Either way, what's the best way to handle things now? [more inside]
I moved/relocated four months ago to a small island in SE Asia. I never really thought much about dating before this - I always seemed to have a partner if I wanted one - but there are so few single guys here looking for Western women that it might become a bit of an issue. But if I try online dating, my matches are likely to be from hundreds of miles away which could end up with me not meeting anyone that way either. Should I give it a go? [more inside]
I've recently made chit-chat with an attractive barista at a coffee shop I frequent, mostly about the writing group I meet with there and a band we both like that she was playing over the sound system one day. This past weekend I signed into OKCupid for the first time in awhile, and she's one of the first matches that comes up for me. So now not only do I know that she's single, but that we both like several other bands, authors, shows and movies. We actually have a good bit in common. Do I exploit my new-found knowledge of her to make conversation in person (which is publicly posted, and it's not like I went looking for it), or do I message her on OKC in a "fancy meeting you here" sort of way? Which is less creepy?
From reading everything on Metafilter and from my own experience, it seems online dating is a game of numbers. With that in mind, I have been trying to meet a large number of men who seem to be a good match for me. My last relationship ended 6 months ago after 1.5 years together. Before I started dating him, I spent nearly 3 years single. I rarely feel attracted to men when I first meet them, but in the past two weeks, I have met two very interesting fellows who I would like to get to know better. The issue is that my mind is completely monogamous. [more inside]
Please help me manage my expectations about online dating! [more inside]
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