Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with counselor

Looking for a specific NYC therapist recommendation

prefpara — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 18:01:28 -0800

I am trying to find mental health help (talk therapy as a start) for my friend, urgently. My friend has the following limitations, in order of importance:

1. sees patients on Saturdays (this is a must)
2. is on or convenient to the UWS (this is very beneficial but not a dealbreaker)
3. is good (this is hard to control for but... you know... obviously highly desirable)
4. has any sort of expertise in, or experience with, patients dealing with chronic illness

I see a referral to a psychiatrist as likely in the future, but at present my friend has only agreed to see a talk therapist, so I'm focused on that presently attainable goal.

I am currently really swamped at work, very stressed, and feel freaked out by the possibility that I won't find someone for my friend to see this Saturday. I would really appreciate any specific names that you can suggest.

Recommendations of a career counselor?

airguitar2 — Tue, 02 Apr 2013 11:43:51 -0800

Have you had great success working with a career counselor? Someone wise, savvy, thoughtful, and creative? I'm looking to work with such a person. Would love your suggestions! I'm in my mid-30s, and after a series of mini-careers, I'm working on how to move forward in a meaningful way. I have about ten different directions I could go in, and I think it might be helpful to work with an awesome career counselor who could help work on the steps to figuring out just what might be a good fit, the steps to get there, etc. Bonus for someone used to working with artists and other creative people.

Have you had a great career counselor you'd recommend? Most folk seem to work over phone/Skype these days, so location isn't an issue.

How do I find good, specific career advice?

primethyme — Wed, 20 Mar 2013 20:34:28 -0800

I am a relatively successful professional, but (like many other people), I suspect that I could be happier doing something else. I've done a lot of different things all within the same general field (software/internet/tech), and I've liked and disliked different things about each of them. I think I have some pretty awesome experience and skills in a nice variety of subjects, with some unusual combinations. What I'd like to find is someone I can sit down with, talk about what I like to do, and what I hate to do, and what I'm good at and not good at. And then have them give me advice about where I should go next in my career - what types of jobs and companies I should look at, etc. There are a couple of ways in which I'm running into difficulty with this.

The chief issue is that I can think of a couple of people in my current company who could potentially have awesome advice for me. But going to a senior person/executive in your own company, and saying "I'm not sure I'm in the right job," has a reasonable chance of being a career-limiting move. Even if I feel close to the person and trust him, talking about this with someone like that seems unwise. Expanding it out, I could possibly talk to people in other companies. And it's probably a bit too much paranoia on my part, but I still worry that I might be limiting my options by doing so. For example, say I meet with someone and say "I really hate the scheduling aspects of project management." If a year down the road I'm desperate for a job (laid off, perhaps), I wouldn't want to apply for something reporting to that person if it required that skillset.

On the flip side, more general career counselors or career coaches don't seem to have the depth of knowledge, or understanding of the industry, to really get the subtleties of what I'm looking for (and trying to avoid). And external recruiters, while many claim to want to help you find your dream job, all really seem to be focused on making their commission by getting you hired somewhere as fast as possible.

Basically, I want someone who knows the industry inside and out (and is up to date on it, including company cultures, etc.), but has absolutely no stake or influence in hiring or firing me, now or in the future. I'm happy to pay for this person's time, but I don't want them to have any incentive other than actually helping me. Does this person exist, and if so, how do I find him or her?

Do I need a bookkeeper, an accountant or someone else???

buddylove — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 13:18:50 -0800

I have come to the conclusion that I am bad with money, and I need help. The question is, who can provide me with the help I need. I've researched various professions online and have a hard time telling who would best suit my needs: a bookkeeper, an accountant, a financial counselor, a daily money manager, someone else entirely?? More than one of these?? Here's a little about my situation: I have a small business and, of course, my own household to run. For the small business end of things, I would like someone to:

Keep records of what my clients owe and whether they have paid me
Provide invoices to my clients upon client request
Make sure my bills are paid on time every time
Make sure my business bank account does not overdraft
Estimate how much I need to set aside for taxes and help me set it aside
Help me file and pay my taxes
Tell me whether putting myself on my own payroll is a good idea, and help me do it if that's what I should do
Review financial documents, balance accounts, check for errors and alert me to things I need to know about
Help me find ways to save money/avoid financial pitfalls

For the personal side of things, I would like someone to:

Make sure my bills get paid on time all the time/avoid late fees and overdraft fees
Help me budget and save for retirement, vacations, car repairs, vet bills, computer replacements and emergencies
Make sure that parking tickets get paid before accruing late fees
Budgeting
Help me develop a plan for paying down debt
Help me make sure that my car gets registered on time annually
Review financial documents, balance accounts, check for errors and alert me to things I need to know about
Help me find ways to save money/avoid financial pitfalls

I have tried doing this on my own for years, with moderate success. I have tried lots of different software programs (Quicken, MoneyDance, YNAB, Mint). I have set things up on automatic bill pay. But inevitably, something falls through the cracks and causes me a great deal of stress. I don't want to be completely absent from the process. Ideally, someone else would manage most of this and sit down with me once a month to show me what they've done, ask and answer questions and make suggestions for what to do next.

I know that there are people out there who find this kind of thing easy or even fun. I am not one of them. I am good at my job, but bad with anything having to do numbers, spreadsheets and filing cabinets. So, who can help me with this stuff? A bookkeeper, an accountant, a daily money manager?? Does anyone have suggestions for specific people?? I live in the Bay Area.

Thanks for your help!

Seeking Louise L. Hay practitioner / counsellor in UK

fries — Sun, 02 Dec 2012 05:00:16 -0800

Seeking Louise L. Hay style counsellor / practitioner in UK (preferably South East) I am looking for a Louise L. Hay style, or similar, counsellor / practioner for a family member who is ill and would like someone to talk to. Please send advice on how to find one in the UK. I've not been successful googling. South East and Sussex would be best but anywhere in the UK would help as a start. Or even an international contact to begin with.

Thank you very much

Where can I find a university/life adviser?

Huck — Fri, 16 Nov 2012 20:31:52 -0800

Is there some sort of 'career/life counselor' out there that can help me navigate college/university programs and requirements after dropping out last year? Background:
I was attending the University of Waterloo for Engineering (which is fairly prestigious I guess) and had a shaky first semester, but passed aside from failing two classes. Second semester (after a semester of co-op), I was struggling and feeling depressed, so temporarily withdrew and took a non-degree term in the fall to clear my fails and I took an extra two 'fun' classes. 4 months off until the Spring term to complete semester 2. Bombed the semester, and would be permitted to repeat it. I could not afford to do that again, so ultimately I dropped out.

Now I am researching going back to school and am looking at a range of programs. Was hoping I could apply as a 'mature student', but now am finding some of the schools requirements to be very different from others (i.e. 2 years out of school vs 5, etc.) I find it quite confusing, and it is hard to know where to begin.

I also know that there are many details/paths to degrees that are not well known (starting at a college, finishing at a university, for example).

I would like to find someone who can help me navigate these program requirements, and help me make the best (unbiased) decision possible.

Would love specific references to individuals I can work with, but wouldn't mind knowing 'what to Google'. Searching for 'life coaches' doesn't really get me anywhere.

(And am open to any other advice, really.)

I'm in Southwestern Ontario.

Finding a couples counselor in Houston?

Pwoink — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 17:49:09 -0800

Does anyone have recommendations for a couples counselor or marriage/family therapist in Houston, TX -- or, at least, what resources I can use to find a good one? Thank you in advance!

Career Conseling As Career?

st starseed — Tue, 04 Sep 2012 13:33:23 -0800

I'm looking for pratical information on the field of career counseling. Reasons why and more specifics inside. There's been a voice in my head telling me for some years to follow my thoughts of becoming a career counselor for college or high school students, and now I'd like to begin acting on them. Career counseling seems like a great, um, career, for an ENFP (if you're into the personality types) like me - I would get to help people, I'd get to work in academic settings, I'd get to think in the big picture, and I'd constantly be faced with different people and goals.

My ideal position would allow me to advise college students on their courses of action during college and for their years after college. I'd work in a college setting, mainly as an advisor, and I'd also be a resource for alumni as well who might need some nudging or advice. I'm open to high school counseling, although I'd prefer to keep it career and future-oriented, as opposed to social counseling.

The main thing holding me from diving in is my hatred of student loans. I am fairly certain that this career track requires at least a master's degree, which would require me to take on some debt I'd really prefer to not have, especially considering I'm still paying my undergraduate student loans.

That being said, can anyone confirm that a master's degree is indeed required to be a career counselor? And assuming I could obtain the degree, where could I start, if not directly in an academic setting? (I've heard temp firms use counselors, but I have no real confirmation.) What opportunities exist in the business world for somebody with no experience in the field (I currently work in finance after spending about six years in media production)? Do you know anyone who is - or perhaps you are one - a career counselor, and if so, do they/you like it?

Sorry for the bundle of questions, and thanks to all who answer.

Help me help them.. thanks...

rich — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 07:55:48 -0800

Asking for a friend.. Marriage Counselor recommendations in the Central NJ area. From past AskMe's I see the Ackerman place, and the Psychology Today's therapist finder.. anyone have personal recommendations? Post here or Memail me. Thanks. A couple that are very close to me and the wife, married for 15+ years.. dunno what the issue is yet, but want to have some resources for them on hand at the ready.

Fighting the good fight in PDX

rabbitrabbit — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 13:06:58 -0800

Need a good marriage counselor in the Portland area! The question right before this reminded me I have been meaning to ask this for a while. We've been married 13 years, one kid, no major problems, we just need to learn how to fight productively and respectfully (we don't fight often at all, maybe once or twice a year, but they never really help resolve anything, it feels like we have the same fight over and over). Particularly because there are bound to be differences in parenting decisions as we enter the toddler years.

We are in Scappoose, so anywhere west of the Willamette would be better than eastside. I don't think there are many Columbia County mefites (maybe I am the only one?) so finding someone in Scappoose is probably a pipe dream.

If you have or know of an awesome couples therapist, post it here or memail me if you don't feel comfortable with commenting publicly.

Many thanks!!

Looking for a professional to help me manage my ADHD

lunasol — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 12:43:40 -0800

I'd like to see professional who can help me develop tools/strategies to cope with ADHD. Should I see an ADHD coach? A cognitive behavioral therapist? How do I go about finding someone? I've been taking ADHD meds for over a year and the effect has been nothing short of life-changing. But I've hit a plateau and I'd like to start seeing a professional to develop strategies for some of the more intractable issues, like my inability to stick with long-range plans or develop productive habits/routines.

I've looked at lists of local ADHD coaches, but none of them seem to take insurance. I've looked at the list of in-network psychologists on my health insurance provider's website and that's just sort of overwhelming to sort through.

The person needs to be a licensed therapist/counselor/psychologist and they need to take my (widely accepted) health insurance.

Minneapolis / western suburb therapist recommendations?

Anonymous — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 09:10:42 -0800

Therapist recommendations for Minneapolis / western suburbs? I'm looking for a therapist to help me (mid-twenties female) with general quarter-life crisis / career directionlessness / getting-shit-togetherishness in Minneapolis or the western suburbs. Insurance-friendly preferable.

Career Counselor in DC?

OmieWise — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 08:48:56 -0800

Can anyone recommend a good career counselor in the Washington, DC area? And what, exactly, could one expect from a visit to a career counselor?

How would one assess whether it's a good fit?
How much should one expect to pay?
What are reasonable goals to have working with a career counselor?

Does anyone have any suggestions for a therapist/counselor in Cleveland?

hazyspring — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 07:44:05 -0800

Does anyone have any suggestions for a therapist/counselor in Cleveland? I'm asking for a friend of mine who lives there and doesn't even know where to start. He is a gay male, so anyone who works frequently with gay patients is a plus but in no way necessary.

What ever happened to deprogrammer Ted Patrick?

snap_dragon — Sat, 30 Jul 2011 19:04:50 -0800

I've finished reading "Let Our Children Go" by Ted Patrick and "Snapping" by Flo Conway and Jim Siegelman amongst others. I read the Wikipedia page on Patrick. My question: Where is he now? Or in the last 20 years? I would have thought magazine or television bit would have done a follow-up on him or at least mentioned him.

I have a lot of questions about therapy.

Anonymous — Sat, 09 Apr 2011 20:23:46 -0800

I need to find a therapist, and I have a lot of questions. I apologize in advance - I know a lot of questions in this vein get asked, but finding the right search terms was just too hard and the multitudes of questions make it hard to find answers. And I also apologize for the rather verbose question, it's really hard for me to boil it down.

I'm 17, about to go to college in the fall, and I'm sick of being miserable. I could go into detail about how I've known since, like, 5th grade that I needed said help but I'm waiting til now, but that's not really relevant. The issues I'm experiencing are mostly in the anxiety/depression-ish (not trying to diagnose myself, just the symptoms line up a little too closely for comfort)/possible unresolved ADD vein (which I realize is a little different, but related, at least for me.) So, therapy, right? But I don't know anything about it.

I was able to find the directory of therapists for my insurance online, and a few in the area. I think I would prefer a man (I'm a girl), knowing that my uncomfortability around school-based therapists and women doctors and people has been this total irrational sense of being judged and whatever and I've felt much more comfortable, oddly enough, with male doctors (of all types) in the past. My options, though, are pretty limited, and most people that come up seem to be LICSW (social worker, right?), with some MA, LMHC. What sort of degree should I be looking for? Social worker sounds wrong to me (I thought they removed abused children from their houses or something, but wikipedia tells me that it seems to be a lot more than that.) Other than meeting in person, is there any way to tell online if you would mesh with them?

My second question is parents. I guess they'll probably be supportive, but they'll probably be all "why?" and I don't want to be like "because I cry myself to sleep twice a week". Do you guys have any suggestion on how to approach it without going into detail about why I know I need it? About how much might it cost them if I use someone listed in the insurance directory (I know this totally depends on the insurance, but if it helps I think it's pretty good insurance, provided by my dad's job at a huge corporation, and has pretty good coverage. I know, for instance, that my pretty damn cosmetic anti-acne topical meds go from $50 to $4 with the insurance.)?

This is totally subjective, but if I was going in 100% ready to open up, how much progress could I really make in the 4ish months before I go to the opposite coast for college? What might happen then? How often do people usually meet? What is therapy...like?

I'm obviously new to all of this, and I'm terrified, but it's kind of come to a head and I know it's something I have to do, if for no other reason than I just wanted a good friend have a rapid breakdown (school, parents, grandparent with cancer, secret abortion...yeah.) and I feel too close to that myself.

Basically, my questions are: How do I find a therapist? How do I ask my parents? How does it work once you're there?

Any other information that you feel is relevant is also welcomed! Thank you!

Throwaway: ireallylikegumdrops@gmail.com. I'm sorry, I couldn't think of a good one. I don't even like gum drops.

Help Hire Hub Headshrinker

Anonymous — Tue, 08 Feb 2011 20:06:10 -0800

Can anyone recommend a good therapist/psychologist/counselor who deals with motivational issues in downtown Boston? (I work very near South Station.) I'd prefer it if they accepted health insurance. I'm in Providence the same day every week as well, if you know someone really, really good there, too. By motivational issues, I mean a very heavy and intense inertia, affecting my home and work life, probably tangled up with depression and ADD or something like it. I'll have a car in Providence, but not Boston (it would take longer to get to my car than it would to drive anywhere in the city.)

Please contact me at hey.nonny.maus@ gmail.com if you don't want to post a reply in public.

I'm trying to recover, but no one believes it happened in the first place.

Pericardium — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 22:45:18 -0800

I grew up in a difficult home situation involving one of my parents, who recently informed that whenever I reached out to a therapist/counselor about what was going on, they would go to her with what I said and even forward e-mails I sent talking about my situation at home. She said they ultimately sided with her, and concluded that I was just a person harboring unfounded anger. I believe her because I've had people I went to for help tell me that she seemed really nice and I must be lying or exaggerating... but i never thought they told her everything.

I feel betrayed and violated. The most recent people to forward things I thought I'd said in confidence over to my mother were college counselors that I'd gone to to try to get help with all the problems my childhood has caused in my adult life. I'm over 18 and I thought there was confidentiality, but I guess not.

I feel hurt and angry. The first person I told about what was going on was a school counselor in my early teens, and although she didn't believe me (She suggested it was a "one time thing"), it still felt good to finally tell somebody.

Now it's like that sense of security was false... I never thought people I went to specifically for help would, or even could, go to my Mom with everything I said. I've talked to at least six people since I was 14 or so, and I'm 20 now, so I have no idea which ones said something other than the college counselor she specifically mentioned.

I'm posting now because I've recently decided to seek professional help in once again trying to deal with the problems that stemmed from my childhood. But now I'm terrified they'll go straight to my Mom again, or they'll think I'm just an angry person but never tell me. Has anyone had any similar experiences? I want to regain my trust because I think therapy is an important step for me in getting better.

Has Your Therapist Fallen Asleep during your session?

ChicagoTherapyConnection — Mon, 24 May 2010 11:24:33 -0800

Has your therapist fallen asleep during your therapy session? I have had a few clients recently that told me their previous therapists would start to nod off during sessions. I had a hard time believing this until others started telling me identical stories. Similarly, I've had patients encourage me to go ahead and answer the phone during their sessions. "My old therapist would answer her calls all the time," they'd say. This seems to incredibly rude and unresponsive that it continues to be hard for me to believe. Has this happened to you?

Seeking a female therapist in Boston

kmavap — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 19:24:10 -0800

[Boston filter] Could anyone recommend a female therapist or psychologist in the city of Boston? Asking for a female, mid 20's friend who just ended a traumatic romantic relationship and is seeking therapy. They must be located in Boston proper or South Boston, not surrounding cities. I'd like to refer her to someone specializing in emotional, self esteem, relationship issues etc.

This question has been asked, but not for 6+ years. Thank you.

Need Adult ADD+Depression counselor in Portland, OR

Fuzzy Dog — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 20:32:05 -0800

[Portland, Oregon Therapist Filter] Asking for a friend. Need to find a strong male therapist for a deeply depressed friend who finally admitted today that he needs help. More after the jump. My friend seems more amenable to counseling to address possible adult ADD, but understands his depression will come up. He has dealt with it for years but doesn't believe in therapists and likes to think he's strong enough to tough it out, just as he expects of others. He has finally hit a wall. It's threatening his family and possibly his life.

He is a big, strong "man's man" who is very smart and has little patience for people who cannot hold their own in heated debate. He needs an intelligent, mature male figure for whom he can develop a deep respect and, hopefully, a lasting relationship. I need a couple of names to start with. The dream guy would have an office within 20 minutes of Lake Oswego and accept Blue Cross. (If you have a female recommendation who'd fit the bill, by all means do share).

Starting fresh, need some help

chromatist — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 01:12:52 -0800

Looking for recommendations for a therapist/counselor in Sydney History

So it's been 7 weeks since my partner left, and while it has been tough (hardest, most emotional thing i've had to deal with) I have quit my job, had some counseling here in Vancouver (with an amazing counselor, mefimail me if anyone needs her details) and will be flying back to Australia on Tuesday to start fresh.

Does anyone have a recommendation for a counselor in Sydney? Preferably one who has experience with break-ups/fresh starts? Preferably in the Eastern Suburbs/CBD? Feel free to mefimail me as well if you need.

Best places to become an LPC in Texas?

D+ — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 11:19:58 -0800

I'd like to become a licensed professional counselor in Texas. How do I figure out what the best schools are? My bachelor's degree is in English, not psychology or a related field, so this is a bit of a change of field and I could use some pointers. For LMFT licensure, I can at least find a list of COAMFTE accredited programs here, but I haven't found a starting point like that for LPC training.

Where does that list exist? What other resources are there for filtering through graduate counseling programs? Do you have a personal recommendation?

Thanks!

Send me back to skool

sambosambo — Sun, 11 May 2008 13:00:07 -0800

How does a 25-year old college dropout go about getting a fresh start at a new university? I dropped out of San Jose State about 2 years ago. I want another shot at getting my degree, but I have no idea how to go about choosing a school to attend.

I chose San Jose State mostly out of fear and laziness, as it was the closest and cheapest university that I was accepted into. After an on-again-off-again relationship with the school, I eventually dropped out. It's been 2 years now, and I have a better idea of what I'd really like to study, and have glimpsed what the future holds for me without finishing my education.

For a number of reasons, I don't want to go back to SJSU. The top reason being that it just wasn't a good fit for me. The second reason is that given the amount of credits I'd have to makeup I'd simply prefer to use the time to start over again rather than play catchup.

I'm very open and would love to get away from the SF Bay Area and California, so how do I narrow my choices and find schools that will fit me?

Sex Therapists/Counselors in Seattle?

Anonymous — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 00:31:41 -0800

Short version: sex therapists/counselors in Seattle?, WA [Slightly longer version after the break] Long version: I have a bigger sex drive than my girlfriend. Not immensely higher, but we have sex, on average, once or twice a week and I would (like many men, I assume) prefer to have sex more often.

I end up associating sex with intimacy and closeness, and whenever we don't have sex (even if it's for a completely rational reason, such as one of us being sick or just not having enough time), I end up feeling rejected. Immensely so. To the point of me lying awake that night in tears, just wanting that sex.

I've come to realize that my attitude is probably damaging to our relationship, in more ways than one. This may ultimately come down to a question of libido (as in, how best to deal with differing sex drives). My girlfriend has been immensely supportive, but at this point she has done all she can and I feel like I need some outside help.

Which brings me to my question: where should I be looking? I'm assuming that this is the kind of thing a sex therapist would deal with, but if there are other resources out there, I'd be glad to look at them. I am open to one-on-one sessions and/or sessions with my girlfriend there. Specific and/or personal recommendations are great [again, for therapists or counselors in the Seattle area].

Finally -- I don't know how these sorts of things work, but I am insured through Premera Blue Cross. Can insurance cover some of the fees associated with this kind of therapy or counseling?

If you prefer not to respond here, email me at sexclueless@gmail.com.

P.S. I realize that this may be a pretty common problem, and it sounds like your garden variety "I want this more than she does" question. I assure you that it's not. Responses that suggest that I find a sexual surrogate, masturbate more often, or DTMFA are not really what I'm looking for.