Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with counseling

Help Me Help a Drunk Friend

snsranch — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 15:03:41 -0800

Where can I find drug and alcohol rehab and counseling here in San Diego with absolutely no funds. I'm asking for a very dear friend who has had a rough couple of years and will soon be homeless and destitute without help.

He had a major injury at home, was laid off, has no health care and started drinking to replace his prescription pain meds. He's since wrecked his car while DUI and has to face those legal problems as well.

I really want to help but don't really know where to start. Talking with him now results in tears and denial. He's drinking 24/7 (vodka) and rarely sleeps. His family is tapped out financially.

Who should I call and what are other ways that I can help him out? It's just my non professional opinion, but considering that he can't even talk about things, let alone go try to get a job it seems like rehab might be his best option.

Affordable therapist in Charlotte

Anonymous — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 09:16:25 -0800

Asking for a family member. We're looking for affordable counseling in Charlotte, North Carolina. Sibling needs counseling, parents can't pay. Can you recommend cheap or sliding scale counselors in Charlotte, NC? Ideally experienced with family counseling and adolescents. Email me at affordabletherapyincharlotte@gmail.com.

Couples / marriage therapy in Round Rock / North Austin, TX?

Alias Unknown — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 19:15:35 -0800

Need to find a therapist for my husband and I in the area. Preferably not affiliated with any religious organization. Need to make the appointment soon. Wanted to go to CAMHC, but they're booked up until January. Recommendations?

Asking all therapists, counselors, social workers, and psychoanalysts etc.: what books are on your must read list?

space_cookie — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 11:22:24 -0800

Asking all therapists, counselors, social workers, and psychoanalysts etc.: what books are on your must read list? Do you have a core set of books that have shaped both your professional and personal development? What are they? Why did you choose them? Feel free to be as wide ranging in your list as you would like - novels, philosophy, neuroscience, religion, psychology, language/linguistics, history, cultural criticism, popular self-help etc. etc.

Thanks So Much!

Two Masters Better than A Doctorate?

zizzle — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 09:20:55 -0800

If all goes well, in Spring 2011 I will have finally completed my Masters in Mental Health Counseling. But I want to apply my degree to higher education. My Masters doesn't grant me all the credits needed for licensure as a Licensed Mental Health Clinician in my state. I would need to do another year to earn the Certificate of Advanced Graduate Study in order to have enough credit hours to sit for the licensure exam. And I am positive that I don't want to do that. Rather, I want to continue working in Higher Ed (I'm currently a lowly assistant in an academic department) and move into a Dean of Students office, Diversity Services office, or a Student Success program.

I am considering, after completing my MS in Counseling on getting a second Masters in Higher Ed administration with a focus on student affairs or a Masters in Student Affairs (same thing, labeled differently). I am wondering though, if an Ed.D. of some sort would be a better for my ultimate goals. I am not questioning the work that would go into an Ed.D and the time to do so --- those are serious considerations that I am weighing in on and I am well aware of all of those associated issues, so I would like this to avoid becoming about the process of a doctorate degrees. I actually turned down doctorate programs in another field a few years ago for a variety of reasons. I'm well aware of what goes into completing a doctorate, and now I'm a different place in my life and far more sure about what I want to do, it is something to consider again. But what I am wondering is if two Masters degrees that I consider interrelated and useful to my career goals would be better or equal to a doctorate in terms of achieving my career goals. Would I be able to be hired as an Assistant Dean of Students, for example, with two masters degrees and a couple of years of administration experience? Or would a doctorate give me a better chance at that?

I would be interested in keeping up with research after finishing a doctorate if that is the route I decide to go, but what's important here is that I want to work in an applied setting most of all. Teaching a couple of classes here and there would be great, but mostly I want to work with students outside of the classroom, work on improving institutional policies and creating a campus environment conducive to student success outside of the classroom and academic components of student life. I'm very much interested in the intersection of a student's academic and personal life, and how the two are often entwined and inseparable for students and what higher ed institutions can do when something personal in a student's life is affecting the academics.

So, AskMe, how would you consider two Masters degree v.s a doctorate for career goals such as mine? Which, in your esteemed opinion, would be the route best for my career goals?

Recommendations for a marriage counselor

frogmoses — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 00:35:51 -0800

Looking for a therapist for marriage counseling in the Easton/Stroudsburg PA area. Any recommendations?

Help me realize my counseling career dreams!

GarotaDaCidade — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 06:53:23 -0800

I want to be a counselor in clinics and/or hospitals. What degree do I need to get? I have a B.S. in psychology. My main interests lie in "behavioral medicine"- the clinical side, not the research side. I want to be a counselor for people with chronic illnesses like HIV, but I also want to live comfortably (and by that I mean never worrying about being able to cover basic needs- I don't need to drive an aston martin).

Originally I thought PhD, but I'm not sure whether hospitals or clinics even hire PhDs to do counseling outside of psych wards, and I'm not so excited about research OR 6 years of school. Then I thought social work, but I feel like I would be locked into a job with a very low salary cap for the rest of my life. I have also thought about a PsyD, or a masters in counseling, etc. etc., but I don't know very much about what kinds of opportunities those degrees will afford.

I have extensive internship and work experience in this area (mostly with MDs who unfortunately can't really answer my questions about psychology careers), and I have taken the GREs (regular and psych), so I feel like getting into a school won't be that terrible for me- it's just a question of picking what school to go to.

Any kind of advice would be greatly appreciated- after going back and forth over so many options, I am at a real loss here.

Recommend a good Boston Metro Relationship/Marriage Therapist/Counselor?

kryptonik — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 14:16:17 -0800

Recommend a good Boston Metro Relationship/Marriage Therapist/Counselor? My wife and I are trying to recover from an affair that ended recently. We're both confident that we can stick it out and have a better relationship than we had before, but right now I'm a little messed up. My friends have recommended that I see a shrink for a little bit to help me figure my side of things out (she has her own therapist already). I've never been to therapy before, and don't know anyone in the Boston area that has seen a relationship counselor at any point. I definitely don't need someone that can prescribe anything as I'm healthy and stable in general.

Any recommendations in the Boston/Cambridge area? I don't have a car, so someone that is accessible via public transit is ideal.

Sexual Assault in NYC: how to address medical incompetence and find better resources for women?

zoomorphic — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 12:28:01 -0800

Awful Filter: What are the best women's crisis centers in NYC who address rape survivors? How can I locate affordable therapy in New York for a rape survivor? How do I call attention to hospital incompetence and unqualified social workers? Much, much more inside. A friend, "Jane," was raped last week by a guy she met through work who asked her out for drinks under the pretense of discussing job opportunities. They got very drunk and wound up at his place, but Jane firmly said "no" when he initiated sex. He ignored her even when she repeated "no" multiple times as he raped her. Afterward he was clearly unaware of (or uninterested in) the damage he'd perpetrated, as he suggested they go out again before he moved to another state in a few days. Jane said she never wanted to see him again and went home.

Over the next two days, our friend persuaded Jane to go to the hospital for an examination and potentially to contact authorities. They went to the Coney Island hospital because a reputable website listed it as a S.A.F.E. center. They were directed to a special room where Jane told her story again and again, only to be asked as many times if she was "sure" she wanted a rape kit because it took 3 hours and Jane had waited almost 3 days to seek medical attention. The doctor and secretary also misinformed Jane that if she took the rape kit, she'd be forced to contact authorities. Jane balked because she didn't know yet what pressing charges entailed, but luckily our friend knew better and corrected the situation. She then waited 4-5 hours for a time-sensitive test that is only useful during the first 96 hours after a rape. During the examination, hospital staff repeatedly and rudely badgered her to make up her mind about pressing charges. She also met with a social worker, aka the S.A.F.E. adviser assigned to offer "psycho-social and legal support," but the woman didn't even know what date rape was. The hospital coordinator curtly asked her--in the middle of the ER--if she was "sure" she wanted to call the cops. He incorrectly chastised her for coming into the hospital earlier and then leaving (untrue--so one wonders if another woman was too alienated by this incompetence and changed her mind). When Jane decided to notify the police, the staff didn't call them for much longer. No one offered her the required information about counseling services, but suggested that she could visit the same social worker again (the one who couldn't define date rape) in another week or two.

In the aftermath: Surely there are better services in New York City for sexual assault survivors. Jane has been remarkably calm and sanguine given the circumstances, but obviously she still needs solid, specialized therapy, especially if she crashes. She's not employed, so we need information about affordable/free counseling. My friend and I are also willing to jointly pay for a good private therapist if you have any suggestions.

As a rape survivor and women's center volunteer, I know that Jane didn't receive adequate care from a hospital that is purportedly an accredited S.A.F.E. center. Jane, our friend and I want to address this hospital's incompetence and insensitivity as quickly and effectively as possible. I've already called NYC Alliance to get it removed from their list as a S.A.F.E. center. We want to make sure that social worker never counsels another rape victim again. I want to know how SAFE centers are certified and why a hospital can so manifestly fail at helping women. How do I go about this?

Lastly, Jane decided to not immediately press charges. I understand her decision, but everyone is naturally concerned that the guy could repeat his actions on someone else. If she decides to let him off the hook, she has expressed interest in contact him to let him know that he did indeed rape her and that she was seriously considering pursuing legal recourse. She'd probably email him from a throwaway account and then spam his email at her regular email address. To me, this sounds therapeutic but potentially damaging, especially he finds a way around that spam filter.

Apologies for this diffuse question. To sum up, I'm looking for:

-ways to address hospital incompetence in the wake of sexual assault
-recommendations for resources tailored to victims of sexual violence
-recommendations for therapists, either free or private and sliding scale
-any advice whatsoever regarding the final paragraph.

Thanks in advance.

Marriage Seminar or Workshop

gm2007 — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 22:34:24 -0800

Looking for a marriage/couple's retreat or seminar. I am looking for a way to reconnect and build a stronger marriage with my wife. We've been married for about 10 years, and I really feel that we need to reconnect. We have three children, but that's not the only reason for this. I really want to be closer to her, but I feel that we need some relationship work. Ideally, I'm looking for a long term program where we can really work on our relationship, but I'm not opposed to starting it off with a workshop or retreat. I'm not looking for any particularly religious-based counseling, although not totally opposed to that either.

What will happen in counseling?

dilettante — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 16:09:52 -0800

What can my friend/former SO expect from community mental health counseling? Long background explanation: I have lived with someone for 9 years. He has mental health problems, with an ever-shifting diagnosis. This shrink it's Bipolar I with features of personality disorder, last was Bipolar II, before that...well, assorted nuts. All his previous treatment has been pharmaceutical, barring some short-lived and disastrous attempts at counseling when he was a teenager.

Most of the time I don't mind having him around and may actually like him to be present, but sometimes he gets angry, and turns it on me. For example, his computer desk breaks, and this turns into screaming, getting in my face, and calling me names, with screaming soliloquies about my assorted personality traits as viewed by him. This has happened occasionally as long as I've lived with him. I find it unacceptable, possibly abusive, and after several years of broken promises and apologies, he is to move out very, very soon.

I have suggested he go to counseling for (what I see as) an anger problem, and he says he will ask his shrink next week. He is on SSI, so his options for counseling will likely be limited to a community mental health system we have here. What can he expect from this, assuming he makes it through the waiting list? They say they use CBT - does anyone have any personal experience of whether this is effective with anger problems? Are there any other useful alternatives for someone with questionable motivation and no money?

Note that SSI leaves people desperately poor, and we are leaving open the possibility that he can move back in when his new lease is up if this helps (although he says he's not convinced this is his problem). He has not been an SO for several years now, but he is still my good friend and I do not want him at any risk of surviving in shelters or starving naked in the street.

Any recommendations for a helpful mental health practitioner person in the area of Portland, Oregon?

brisquette — Thu, 21 May 2009 13:25:55 -0800

Any recommendations for a helpful mental health practitioner person in the area of Portland, Oregon? After a few stressful months of medication issues, my boyfriend and I have lost a lot of faith in our psychiatrist, and are looking for additional forms of help and advice, whether a therapist, counselor, or even just a different psychiatrist. We'd both been on ADD medication for a while (I'm on Adderall, he was taking Vyvanse) when my boyfriend (Charles) began to feel that maybe he was depressed. So in January, on the next trip to the psychiatrist, the doctor gave him a prescription for Zoloft. That seemed to be going pretty well, but I didn't ask too many questions about it because I didn't want him to feel weird about being on anti-depressants.

A month later, his prescription ran out right as we were leaving on a 2 week vacation to the other side of the country, and my kind and funny boyfriend started acting like a manic irritable whackjob who saw mystical signs everywhere.

Once we got back to Portland, I managed to get him into the doctor's office again after a week or so, and by the end of the session the doctor was worried enough to put Charles on Zoloft for a little longer, but had him taper down over about a week. The doctor also sent home a sample bottle of Zyprexa, with vague instructions ("take this if stuff gets too much, or if you get too irritable.). This curbed the manic behaviour, and things settled down for a while, but he was still acting weird and saying weird things, and our friends started to notice and get concerned.

This gets us to the beginning of April, when I get a call from Charles' work, since I'm his emergency contact. They think it's best if I come pick him up. They had a meeting to discuss his erratic behaviour, and it became obvious he wasn't in a mental state to talk about it. So another round of calls and doctors appointments and now meetings with human resource folks follows. The doctor now decides that mood stabilizers are in order. Hellooo, Tegretol.

Life has calmed down a bit. My boyfriend's on meds, he's back at work, and we can talk and hang out and be a couple again. Although his work and his union has been really great about all of this, it's been a downer for our relationship and our friendship. Walking down the street can be overwhelming for him. After months of coping with all the ups and downs, I'm starting to get exasperated, even though I know better.

We both are carrying a grudge against our doctor, for various reasons. Neither of us feel that he gives enough practical information about the medication he dispenses. The recent incidents surrounding the antidepressants made me remember how little info I got when the same doctor first put me on Adderall. I used the internet like crazy, but it feels like I had to dig up my own solutions, even though this guy is supposed to be really good at ADD stuff.

My impression is that the doctor didn't give my partner enough warning about how anti-depressants are sort of a big deal, and the last thing you want to do is go off of them suddenly.

Our doctor also seems too willing to indulge philosophical meanderings, which is fine when you're feeling normal, but even when Charles was getting over the paranoid, manic episodes, the doctor didn't tone down the philosophy, and it left Charles feeling weird.

The last time we saw the doctor together, the doctor said that the episodes and behavior were signs of something that probably would have come out anyway, in a couple years. After spending the last couple months scouring the Psych/Disorders section at the bookstore, I do see his point, but it's also really hard not to have him even even acknowledge that maybe none of this would have happened if my partner had just stayed on the medication. I have close friends who've given me way better practical advice than our doctor has, and that's disappointing.

So I'd like to go see a new doctor, psychiatrist or otherwise . Charles is a little burnt out on meds and doctors right now, but accepts that after the last couple of months, it's important to have someone sane to check in with every now and then. He's still on the Tegretol, but is disgruntled about the apparent complications that medication has brought into his life.

I don't know enough about the big wide world of mental health people to know exactly the term for what I'm looking for. Someone who can be practical about real life, someone who will help us find our personal goals and then follow through with them. Someone who's good at talking to a couple of ADD twentysomethings.

ELIZA and the efficacy of "professional" therapists versus the rest of us

XMLicious — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 14:48:35 -0800

Meta-Meta-RelationshipFilter: Have there been any scientific trials to study the efficacy of talk therapy that involved a placebo as control? I'm thinking, is there any definitive proof that a professional talk therapist is substantially more effective than just talking about shit with a friend who doesn't charge a fee (which, granted, RelationshipFilter isn't necessarily like), or even substantially more effective than simply sitting someone down, telling them "we're going to have conversations that will explore and fix your psychological problems" but then having a discussion about any old thing that will run the clock out?

My own experience with years of visiting a variety of talk therapists would appear to indicate that at least with the average therapist I've seen the answer would be "No, there is no substantial difference" but I'm curious to see what if anything science has said. I'm definitely not saying that RelationshipFilter is any replacement for hours of ongoing, focused personal discussion, I'm just curious as to whether "professionalism" in this area, even of practitioners who are licensed or certified, has any demonstrated and quantifiable value.

Desperate in Vancouver

Anonymous — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 10:53:24 -0800

Can someone recommend a psychologist in Metro Vancouver who deals with adolescents and adults? My wife and I are at our limits with our 16 yr old who we believe may have some form of personality disorder. We would like her to get some counseling but she's adamantly opposed to it. We would like to get some professional advice ourselves on how best to deal with our family issues and possibly on how to convince her to go for counseling , but picking a name out of a phone book is too much of a duckshoot. I pick Mefi over the yellow pages!

Pre-marital counseling in Chicago?

bibbit — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 12:26:16 -0800

Any suggestions for a pre-marital counselor in Chicago? My fiance and I are doing a church wedding, and we are doing the Catholic pre-Cana requirements, but we actually think our church's requirements are too...minimal. Our church only requires on "engaged enrichment day" and two meetings total with another couple. The church is in my hometown and so it's a fair amount of travel for us to do more with that church. It was suggested we look into Couple Communication, which is more what we're looking for. The problem is that they don't have any Chicago-proper counselors listed (and the nearest ones haven't responded to my requests for more information...).

We'd like to find a counselor/therapist who can talk to us about communication and preparing for being married. We don't want to do a group session, and we don't want to do a weekend retreat. We have no major issues (that we know of....), but just want to have a solid base to work from and think a third person to talk to might be a help.

Do you have specific suggestions of people or organizations we should look into?

DIY group therapy

serazin — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 18:36:16 -0800

I think I'm looking for co-counseling, but without the co-counseling. I've done many, many years of therapy by myself and with various partners and I'm pretty much over it. However, I think I would get a lot out of having a small group of folks to share with who weren't necessarily my close friends or professionals either. Somewhere with a semi-formal structure that had some guidelines but without a formal mediator or counselor. Ideally with people who have some very basic background in therapeutic techniques.

I like some of what I've heard about co-counseling - the peer-to-peer, nonprofessional aspect mostly. But I feel very skeptical about the culture of co-counseling, the classes you're expected to spend money on, the ideology and (to me) goofy sounding jargon.

Anyhow, is there some organization I can join that's less formal that co-counseling? Are there groups like what I'm describing already around? Do you have suggestions for how I could find a few people to form such a group with?

I live in the SF Bay Area if that matters.

How to help a friend cope with a parent's attempted suicide.

Anonymous — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 16:49:28 -0800

Help me support a friend whose father attempted suicide. Added complication: my friend is half a world away from both his family and me. My friend "M" called me a few hours ago with the horrible news that his father had attempted suicide. Its caught him and his family completely off-guard as M's dad has always projected the image being the total strong and capable father/husband/provider - also the type that probably bottled issues and emotions up, fwiw. Thankfully, it does appear that he's now getting the care that he needs. My question is how to support my best friend through this.

The complication is that M is currently stationed overseas, with his family and myself back in the states. Talking to M, he seems to be a little dazed by these events right now. I've strongly urged him to go talk to someone over there - he mentioned that there are facilities with counselors/therapists where he's at, or he may go talk to his unit's chaplain. This is his second deployment, and he's always had such an incredibly good state of mind given the stressful conditions he's faced, and I worry that this could really throw him. M pushes himself hard being a good officer and commander, I'm concerned he won't make the effort/take the time to help himself deal with it.

I'm the person that he's emotionally closest to (much more so than his family), and we're able to talk fairly often. I've already started to gently urge him to talk to a professional about this, and I'll continue to do so. But I want ideas/suggestions/comments on anything else I can say or do to help him through this tremendously difficult time. If you wish to respond off-metafilter, please email me at: anonsupport3@gmail.com

How do I get him to lay his cards on the table?

Anonymous — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 18:30:12 -0800

Getting married in September but my husband-to-be won't come clean about his finances. My fiance is all-in-all a great guy. The most recent example: He rode several miles on his bike in the middle of the night in 20 below weather to get medicine for my cat that he doesn't even like that much---three times.

Despite his myriad good qualities, we have a major problem. He refuses to divulge how much debt he is in (I know he at least has student loans he's not paying by his huge stack of unanswered mail), nor his exact credit status which he has admitted is bad and on top of that, he appears to be in dutch with the IRS.

Neither one of us make a lot of money but we get by okay and are generally quite happy. We are looking forward to getting married but I need to have our finances straightened out (not necessarily completely paid off, but just have a plan) in order to feel secure doing that.

I know he fears my reaction when I find out the extent of things but I am sincerely not interested in judging or chastising him. I've been where he's been and know how scary it is. The difference is that I made the decision at 25 to clean up my act and be financially responsible while he's 38 and still acting like he's too cool to be concerned about such things.

I'm still working on getting my credit back but I am willing and able to be completely transparent with him about my financial status. When I try to get him to talk about his stuff he always attempts to put it off or make me feel bad for nagging him.

I'm not going to love him less if he's a million dollars in debt and has a credit rating of zero. I just need to know where we stand financially as a couple so we can make a plan to get to where we need to be.

The IRS thing is the most pressing concern for me. In 2007, he made a lot more money than he normally does and ended up owing taxes on it for which he was (surprise, surprise!) not prepared. After April 15 I asked him if he had filed and he said no, that he had gotten an extension till October. So I asked him from time to time up until the middle of October if he had filed yet and the answer was always no. I was, admittedly, a little miffed because I felt like he was procrastinating himself out of the free money that was the economic stimulus package. Technically, the money was his to do with as he wished but it still seemed unfair to me as I had spent my tax refund and stimulus bonus on furniture for the both of us and sort of assumed he would do the same as we desperately needed furniture. In addition, it just seemed emblematic of his financial irresponsibilty.

Finally, after the second filing deadline had passed I asked him again if he had filed and the answer was finally yes. I accepted him at his word and let it go. Fast forward to a couple months ago when he receives a thick letter in the mail from the IRS--addressed to the apartment we had moved from in July, long before he had supposedly finally filed.

At this point I am pretty sure he lied to me about filing and told him as much and asked to look at the letter from the IRS. He refused and insisted I let him take care of the tax situation himself. I told him all of the things I stated above...that I just wanted us to be honest with each other...blah blah blah, but he insisted it was a point of pride for him to take care of it on his own. I told him that he needed to take care of it then and I would need proof it had been taken care of and he agreed.

Currently, he claims to have asked his parents for a loan to pay his tax bill. I have no idea how much the bill is for and have no way too verify that he did what he said he did other than to call his parents and humiliate him which I won't do.

At this point, I really doubt he has done anything about his taxes and I'm feeling deceived, though I have no proof. I think he's just hoping the problem will go way on its own or I'll forget about it.

I don't want to lose an otherwise great relationship because of this, but I can't just stick my head in the sand and marry him.

This is obviously an ego issue for him and a practical and trust-related one for me. How can I get him to realize how important this is before I have to ditch him at the altar?

Also, any online resources or advice regarding the combining of finances, financial couples counseling, etc. would be greatly appreciated.

Good Stanford-area therapists?

finnb — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 10:11:44 -0800

Your recommendations for an inexpensive counselor/therapist in the Palo Alto-Menlo Park area? I live near Stanford (I'm not a student there, though, so I can't take advantage of their services). I have a history of depression, and it's started getting bad again. I'd like to find a therapist or counselor to help me get through this period and over these problems, without paying too much (grad student on extended research trip with a part-time job). Anyone you would recommend?

Feel free to email me privately (f at mavo dot nu). Thanks for your time.

How can I find control issue counseling in Central America?

bryak — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 07:16:34 -0800

i returned recently from four years working in iraq and am having some readjustment issues that are probably going to cost me the most important relationship in my life. does anyone know of any sort of counseling for control issues that i could do? i've been living in a world where people do what i tell them to, or i get rid of them. when i ran a project, i did exactly as the contract specified, and took nothing less than my complete and exact specifications from the people below me. that was just the way it had to be, or control of everything was lost. i know that's not how things work back home, so i moved to central america with my fiancee so i could work on something new for a while instead of trying to go back to my old routine. i thought it would easier to adjust to something new than to go back.

after about three months, i started slipping back into my old routine and going off the handle when something didn't go exactly as i specified, then, the other day, she was stop-lossed by the national guard and i lost it. in the end, she left, and i understand why, but i want to try to salvage this if there is any chance, and the only thing i can think of to prove how serious i am would be to enroll in some counseling.

here are my problems, though; i have no idea where to look, i am living in central america and have too many responsibilities here to clean up and get back to the states for this before she deploys, and i was privately employed in iraq, so none of the channels available to government personnel are available to me.

i want to get going to prove that i want to fix this, i just don't know where to look.

Two Master's Degrees... What are my options?

msposner — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 10:57:38 -0800

This spring I will be finished with my second Master's degree. I've been at my current job for almost three years and while I enjoy it immensely, I am wondering about other opportunities that having two graduate degrees might open up for me. Am hoping to obtain answers especially from individuals who have multiple degrees and have gone into somewhat different career paths. My first graduate degree is a M.S. in Secondary School Education. I am qualified to teach in public school (context area: Social Studies). I also am certified to teach at schools for the deaf but that is not something I want to focus on because of how such institutions are being shut down at an alarming rate.

My second graduate degree is going to be a M.S. in Professional/Rehabilitation Counseling, which I'll be obtaining in May of 2009. I'm not going to be pursuing my Certified Rehabilitation Counselor (CRC) certificate because I was recently on their advisory panel and signed a waiver stating that I promise not to take the CRC test for at least five years due to first-hand exposure to potential test questions. This is perfectly fine with me because I'm not planning on having my own independent counseling practice and I have no desire to work for any of the major insurance companies around here.

I currently work at a state agency as a vocational rehabilitation counselor and while I do enjoy this job very, very much, lately it seems as if I'm often hearing from people (respected professionals) that I should be doing something "better" and so forth.

For me, "better", would be to obtain employment as a researcher (researcher scientist?) or a professor at a college/university, which is actually my ultimate goal but I'm also open to acquiring other, relevant experience that might enhance myself as an educator. I'm a voracious reader and I'm always conducting research- I'd really like to go into education/rehabilitation policy if the opportunity ever presents itself.

For now, my intention is clearly to "stay put" because as I mentioned, I love my job and I enjoy working with my colleagues, however, I have my goals outside of this field and have oftentimes thought about returning to the classroom as a high school teacher.

In a nutshell, my inquiries are defined as follows:

(I) I've been told that having Master degrees in both education and counseling will make me very attractive to school systems. True?

(II) Will the fact that I do not have terminal degrees in either fields (education and counseling) hurt my chances in obtaining research-based positions and/or work as a college instructor?

(III) For someone with two Master's degrees, what are the other fields I could go into when I have specialization in both education and counseling?

(IV) Has anyone experienced negative pitfalls of having multiple graduate degrees such as frequent rejections on the basis of being overqualified?

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Caveat #1: I am profoundly deaf. This, unfortunately, creates a lot of barriers for me in the workplace. Many schools have refused to hire me because in order for me to instruct in public schools, they would have to also pay for a full-time sign language interpreter since I communicate primarily in American Sign Language. In their eyes, I'm not cost effective- I'm a budget burden. As I mentioned earlier, I do not want to work at schools for the deaf because of the lack of job security and their notoriously low salaries.

Caveat #2: I've mentioned that I love my current job. However, I am also trying to plan ahead (1-3 years) and have always been open to other opportunities.

Caveat #3: Not really looking to relocate anytime in the near/distant future. Wife loves her job and is pregnant with our first child. We also put a lot of work in our present home.

Caveat #4: I'm 27 years old.

Caveat #5: My current job is paying fully for my second graduate degree, which is really the only reason why I went back to school after I completed my first Master's.

Thanks in advance for all of your suggestions/insights.

Incommunicado

chara — Sun, 02 Nov 2008 05:28:22 -0800

Couples counseling without the counselor: My SO and I have some conflicts that keep reoccurring. We really need some counseling, but we're in a long-distance relationship and we only see each other on the weekends, so meeting face to face with a counselor would be very difficult right now. Do you have any suggestions for REALLY GOOD books or websites to help people navigate through relationship issues and settle conflicts? Our main issue is connection/communication. If he feels I'm being distant or disconnected, instead of telling me, he retaliates by shutting down emotionally, then when I try to figure out what's wrong and how to fix it, he blows me off. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. We want to end this cycle, TODAY.

So, any suggestions about books, websites, or just general advice that you may have?

Marriage counselor in Atlanta

Anonymous — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 17:46:52 -0800

Can anyone help me find a good marriage counselor in the Atlanta, Ga area?

Does a conservatorship form of financial counseling exist?

Anonymous — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 17:08:13 -0800

Is there a such a thing as a voluntary financial conservatorship that I could convince someone to sign up for? There is someone in my life who is terrible with money and needs help. This person is not elderly and does not have dimensia, she just cannot handle her own finances. Is there a financial counseling type service where this person could sign over her accounts and paychecks to a service that, for a fee, will pay her bills and debts for her and issue her an allowance for groceries and whatnot from the excess? I don't know anything about debt relief/credit counseling type places, so any information would be helpful. Also, the names of reputable companies that offer this service would be appreciated, if this service does exist. She can't just set up automatic bill pay. If she retains any control over her finances, the problems will continue. I am not prepared to do this myself, so that is out. It would have to be a service that would do it for her. Thanks.

helpful? cult-like? both?

genmonster — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 20:22:27 -0800

Re-evaluation Counseling- helpful or cult-ish? (or both?) A couple friends swear Re-evaluation Counseling (or co-counseling?). I was thinking about giving it a shot, but I'd like others' experiences especially because I'm guessing groups vary a lot from place to place. And if I do decide to check it out, how do I find a group in my area? (and no, it's not listed on the website)