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Users that often use this tag:
Anonymous (46)
EatTheWeak (2)

Relief for the bereaved

My mom died two weeks ago. It was from a fast growing lymphoma - was sudden and unexpected. She was an incredibly healthy person leading up to about the year before her death - no vices at all, exercised religiously, and maintained a very healthy lifestyle. Question revolves around help for coping with this loss, potential near-future loss of father, and changes in live. [more inside]
posted by dmbfan93 on Jul 5, 2014 - 12 answers

Strictly Business, like EPMD

What are some techniques I can use to get through a day job that is sometimes really grating? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 4, 2014 - 5 answers

Oh, just get over it!

I am a public librarian. Sometimes I have to deal with problem patrons, and on rare occasions, those interactions turn ugly, and I have to ask the person to leave the building, etc. The problem is, I get upset, and then I get all flushed and shaky and worst of all, I cry. And when that happens, I can't really go off by myself and get composed -- I'm usually at the reference desk alone, so I can't be away for more than a minute or two. I've read previous AskMe questions about avoiding the crying, and have tried a lot of those tricks -- what I'd really like is to avoid getting so emotionally upset in the first place. [more inside]
posted by sarcasticah on May 19, 2014 - 42 answers

Coping with being rejected from a top school

My transfer application to a top school was recently rejected, and it was the last undergraduate application that I could send in. Would like some advice on coping with it. [more inside]
posted by suburbs on May 15, 2014 - 26 answers

How to Handle People When You Cannot Handle People

Seeking coping strategies for dealing with the public on small and large scales during a major depressive episode. My old ways of dealing with a deep low like this are not compatible with the life I've built since the last time this happened, and I would like to keep that life together. [more inside]
posted by EatTheWeak on Apr 21, 2014 - 14 answers

Books & Resources on Letting Go

I'm seeking books and other resources on getting over being cheated on. I'm tired of being hurt by it. [more inside]
posted by mibo on Apr 7, 2014 - 8 answers

My brother died four days ago. My father is coping by being abusive.

My brother passed away on Monday. My father is coping by lashing out. What do I do? [more inside]
posted by TryTheTilapia on Mar 7, 2014 - 22 answers

4 year old, Shared custody, Heartache

Our daughter frequently wants to go back to her moms house when we have her. How can we help/cope? Background and details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 5, 2014 - 63 answers

What doesn't kill you makes you _______.

Looking for advice on coping mentally and emotionally with a long stretch of stress, boredom and pain — when these are things that I ordinarily find very hard to tolerate. (No need to worry about coping physically; the logistical details of preparation, pain management and aftercare have been taken care of.) [more inside]
posted by this is a thing on Feb 18, 2014 - 16 answers

Coping strategies for finding out how awful you really are

What do you do when you realize that, not only are you not even close to being the hero of your own story, you're most likely the main problem? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 24, 2014 - 36 answers

This can't continue

You aren't my doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist, but maybe you have something to share that will help me get onto a path toward curing a relentless, life-altering ( in the worst possible way( issue with sleep. [more inside]
posted by marsbar77 on Jan 11, 2014 - 53 answers

How do I work productively at ANY time in ANY mood?

I have trouble getting work done if I'm not in the right mood, which is a rarity. I've become an extreme avoider of anything that will make me mad or frustrated or remind me of things that make me mad and frustrated. The problem is that I’m the number two in a small, overly-ambitious company that may just be the most frustrating one in existence. So I have what many would call an impossible workload and also a massive amount of frustration. The latter unfortunately usually cancels out the former for me and leads to much more of both. Oh, and I can’t easily quit, because it’s a family business and my boss/dad’s life’s work. Simply put, I need to do a complete 180. I need to go from being an emotionally-scarred avoider to a guy that can do what needs to be done even when he feels like screaming until his lungs explode. Paper thin skin to tank armor. I’ve taken too long to realize that if I don’t solve this now, it may ruin the company and my life. I’ll take whatever you can give me: advice, coping techniques, books or articles I should read, websites and online communities I should visit, specific counseling suggestions (not just “get counseling”), whatever. I just can’t take it anymore. [more inside]
posted by KinoAndHermes on Jan 6, 2014 - 23 answers

help with post-break up coping?

i'm at break-up +3 months and could stand to re-up my mefite input as regards coping. [more inside]
posted by fingers_of_fire on Dec 29, 2013 - 11 answers

How do you cope with an utterly draining person who you can't avoid?

For various reasons, I'm in currently in a domestic situation with a family member who is really, really draining. This person has quite a few traits that seem narcissistic/borderline/non-respectful of boundaries. [more inside]
posted by SpecialSpaghettiBowl on Dec 6, 2013 - 13 answers

flipped out!

How do I get better at not ignoring all the positive emotional work I've done when suddenly being triggered in a high-stress low-functioning situation? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Nov 20, 2013 - 6 answers

Help me hold it together for the next 3 weeks

I have a history of anxiety, but two years ago began feeling well enough that I stopped all medication and treatment, and did fine until the past couple of weeks, when I experienced a trigger (dental pain). The teeth and the pain are getting taken care of--but the anxiety just continues to balloon out of control. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I am just a thrumming, chain-smoking ball of nerves. I missed work for the first time over this today, and know I need help. So I am seeking it: I have scheduled an appointment with a psychiatrist--my previous one moved away--but his first available is in 3 weeks. (His office advised me to go to the ER if I needed help before the appointment.) So now I just have to hold it together between now and then so I don't completely lose my mind or miss enough work to threaten my job. Oh, HiveMind, please help me. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 4, 2013 - 7 answers

Maintaining fitness and sanity on a low-calorie diet

I'm an overweight (technically obese) triathlete who was recently put on a calorie-restricted (1200-1400/day), moderately carb-restricted (100-130 g/day) diet by my doctor(s). They also have me front-loading my calories into breakfast and lunch at the expense of dinner. It's been hard on me in various ways, physically and psychologically -- my training is suffering, and I really miss being able to share a normal dinner with my partner. I'm also on seriously non-optional medication that makes it hard for me to lose weight and, relatedly, has probably made me insulin-resistant. Help me cope. (Psychological beanplating as well as gory metabolic details for nutrition nerds within.) [more inside]
posted by dorque on Oct 30, 2013 - 29 answers

Coping with frustration

I get frustrated with my roommate easily (sometimes fairly, sometimes unfairly), and need some coping mechanisms to remain civil. Roommate and I are friends, and generally have fun when we spent friends time together outside of the apartment. But we have some living differences... [more inside]
posted by Chaussette Fantoche on Oct 22, 2013 - 31 answers

How to not let a mean family member (and people in general) get to me?

I have an extended family member that likes to poke fun at me - I consider the fun to be mean spirited, he doesn't. He doesn't let up, and it makes me dread family gatherings, because I know that I will get peppered with rude comments (about what I'm wearing, my sexuality, etc.). I have a hard time knowing what to say in response, and I find this to be the case when dealing with many people that I would consider to be "assholes". How to cope and not let myself get scared away from events by people like him? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 21, 2013 - 62 answers

Help Me Change My Outlook on Outlook

If my work email inbox changes, even slightly, my anger meter goes immediately to 10, and I spend entirely too much time being grumpy and fussing about it. How can I reframe these annoyances as opportunities for zen and personal growth, instead of a blood rage that leads to ultimately futile quests to have everything exactly the way I want it? [more inside]
posted by redsparkler on Sep 18, 2013 - 13 answers

How do I cope with the end of the world without making others unhappy?

I'm not a survivalist, but I don't feel good about the world. I feel like conversations (around the lunch table, with friends and family, etc) are all sort of hovering slightly above desperation, with regards to things like the financial system, wars, politics, surveillance, technology, depression, etc. It feels like every room is full of elephants and nobody knows what to say about them. Sometimes I feel like I'm draining the joy from the situation -- though I mostly keep all my fears to myself, I worry that I somehow remind everyone of "the darkness." It has something to do with suppression. I don't think I'm alone in feeling like this, so I wonder if there are any intelligent resources for the psychological and social aspects of it.
posted by mbrock on Aug 31, 2013 - 31 answers

how to cope with starting a new job that I don't want?

I love my part-time job, but it doesn't pay the bills. In order for it to become a full-time job that pays the bills, I have to go back to school and get a master's (library science - yay for very little career opportunities!). In order to go back to school, I need to get a full time job and earn some money to pay for school. I just accepted a full time office assistant position in a law firm. I'm not excited at all. Help! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 25, 2013 - 16 answers

Fun ideas for a workshop on emotions?

Help me design a workshop about emotions, self-awareness, and coping strategies for 50 queer youth! [more inside]
posted by whalebreath on Aug 6, 2013 - 12 answers

Is there any answer I can give that won't result in more pushups?

I need advice for gracious, loving, kind, and assertive ways to deal with a very specific type of bullying. I don't really know what to call it, but I will describe it as best I can. [more inside]
posted by windykites on Jul 19, 2013 - 34 answers

Coping with a balding future

So, in my twenty-sixth year, a future of baldness is becoming pretty clear. I've basically made up my mind not to fight it via medication and so on, so how to I keep from falling into despair when I see photos and videos of my less-and-less-dashing self? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 8, 2013 - 42 answers

How do I cope with the loss of my first love after 8 months of marriage?

I dated my first love for 2-1/2 years and then we got married. She was my first girlfriend and I was her first boyfriend. She asked for a divorce about a month ago. How do I cope? Please see the extended explanation for specific questions. [more inside]
posted by speedoavenger on May 27, 2013 - 22 answers

Scumbag brain.

My son's father suffered a ruptured aneurysm last week. He's not getting better and I want to be as supportive as possible to him and his family. How do I do that like a normal person? [more inside]
posted by youandiandaflame on May 12, 2013 - 15 answers

How to help a friend going through hell

Major breakup, deaths of close relatives, and pet illness and predicted pet death. How can I possibly help? [more inside]
posted by wannabecounselor on Apr 26, 2013 - 17 answers

How to help a relative cope with past sexual assault?

My elderly mother in law recently confided in me that her now-deceased husband sexually assaulted her decades ago and it haunts her daily. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 19, 2013 - 10 answers

The Drama of "The Drama of the Gifted Child"

Suggestions for coming to terms with childhood neglect. [more inside]
posted by trinity8-director on Mar 6, 2013 - 15 answers

Help me cope with chronic illness

I really, really don't want to be 'the sick girl', help me figure out how to look after myself and navigate the social aspects of having a chronic illness. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 16, 2012 - 17 answers

It's not me, it's actually you.

Am I being friend-dumped? (small wall of text and some itty bitty snowflakes) [more inside]
posted by sockorama on Dec 12, 2012 - 49 answers

We are at different ends of the emotional spectrum, are we doomed?

We are at totally different ends of the emotional spectrum, are we doomed? [more inside]
posted by JIMSMITH2000 on Dec 10, 2012 - 36 answers

Help me get to January

Marriage fizzling; need your best holiday coping methods to get through the rest of the year. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 4, 2012 - 12 answers

Coping with social isolation after the end of a long relationship.

I had a serious relationship of about ten years that ended a bit more than a year ago. My SO was my sole source of human friendship and companionship. Now that I'm on the other side, I'm struggling. How do I cope with the lack of meaningful human interaction and what can I do to move towards something better? [more inside]
posted by prex on Nov 26, 2012 - 23 answers

General advice for someone going through a divorce?

General advice for someone going through a divorce? [more inside]
posted by sugarbomb on Nov 19, 2012 - 19 answers

How can I help deal with my girlfriend's depression?

How can I help deal with my girlfriend's depression? [more inside]
posted by *lostatsea* on Oct 22, 2012 - 19 answers

How can I cope with celibacy?

I'm a heterosexual American man in my mid-20s. I have no relationship experience, never had sex, never kissed, never held hands, blah blah blah. I'm not looking for help approaching women, I just need some ideas on how to cope with a life of loneliness. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 16, 2012 - 68 answers

I'm looking for blogs where people suffering from illnesses share their experience.

Where can I find personal blogs from people suffering from illnesses? [more inside]
posted by Autumn on Oct 11, 2012 - 11 answers

Coping mechanisms for dealing with suicide ideation?

Coping mechanisms for dealing with suicide ideation, when there's no actual intent to commit suicide? [more inside]
posted by yeoz on Sep 11, 2012 - 17 answers

"Children almost always hang onto things tighter than their parents think they will." Right? RIGHT?!

Our daughter has come to an age where she wants to try more and more thrilling amusement park rides. We have come to an age where we don't. How do parents with their own fears let their kids go and have fun on the thrill rides, when accompanying them is becoming less and less of an option? And, if the anxieties are such that even watching them from the ground is too gut-wrenching, and sitting at home while the kiddo goes with others is still quite nerve-wracking, what might work to deal with those fears? [more inside]
posted by peagood on Aug 2, 2012 - 43 answers

I just want to get back to normal. This is hard.

My depression is getting out of hand. I’ve started therapy, and will probably soon be on meds. But I’m having trouble coping, during the in-between times. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 16, 2012 - 10 answers

How can I get over my miscarriage?

How can I get over having had a miscarriage when there's a strong chance we'll have to make the choice not to have another child? [more inside]
posted by christinetheslp on Jun 25, 2012 - 22 answers

There's no good way to deal with this situation, but surely there are better ones.

I had to back out of my childcare job in a not-entirely-graceful manner for an emergency last week. Could I have handled this better? How do I proceed now? How should I proceed if something similar were to happen in the future? Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by ActionPopulated on Jun 4, 2012 - 15 answers

Help me keep my focus for at least the next 8 days

So much is going wrong, I'm having a hell of a time coping. Huge deadline looming and I need help coping/repressing all this stress for at least a week. [more inside]
posted by Beacon Inbound on May 24, 2012 - 12 answers

Coping strategies and help from-a-distance for a small family stretched thin by a few curveballs?

What can I do from afar for a bedridden SAHM of an 18mo, and in general for their stressed-out family? Looking for anything and everything---advice, care basket ideas, childcare options, cleaning services, etc.---in the Echo Park/Silverlake/Los Feliz area of Los Angeles. [more inside]
posted by cocoagirl on May 22, 2012 - 15 answers

How do I make it through a long, pointless meeting?

I need advice on surviving a corporate retreat with my sanity intact. This isn't a "'fun' activity leads to team bonding" kind of retreat, it's a "sit in a conference room for hours discussing the future of our unit" retreat. So, essentially, a six-hour meeting, and I am not good with meetings. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 1, 2012 - 23 answers

Active Duty vs. Reserves + Coping with Disappointment

US Marine Corps: Active Duty vs. Reserves: My partner wants to be an active duty Marine but his only option may be to join the reserves. Mefites, what is your expierence with active duty vs. reserves, and how can I help him cope with his disapointment? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 21, 2012 - 8 answers

Help me keep helping my wife deal with long-term unemployment.

The psychological fallout of my wife's 13-month unemployment is going to make me crack. Please help me deal. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 14, 2012 - 31 answers

Helping a struggling parent.

My poor, overworked, lonely, non-English-speaking immigrant mother is approaching 50. Her daily existence is a living hell. Short of winning the lottery, what can I do to improve her quality of life? [more inside]
posted by Nomyte on Feb 29, 2012 - 23 answers

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