I've been bombing in interviews for IT Help Desk, or Desktop Support positions, and whenever I've called back the interviewer, the most common answer they give is "poor communication skills". Is there any entry point into the field that wouldn't rely so much on working with people? Would it make more sense to work as QA tester, and then try to transition to something in systems or database administration?
I asked a boy out! And he said yes! But then he didn't respond when I tried to nail down the details. What should I do now? [more inside]
Please help me mitigate/cope with my feelings about doctors/insurance and have the best visit with a general practitioner that I can after 10 years of being uninsured. This way lies snowflakes. [more inside]
I'm in a long-distance relationship: my S.O. is in California, I'm on the East Coast. We've been pretty lucky with getting to meet up regularly since his job often pays for him to come out here and I've had a number of opportunities to get out there. But I'm feeling a personality clash arising from his erratic scheduling. Question clusterbomb ahoy! [more inside]
I haven't had a boyfriend since I was 16 and I'm 22 now. I'm dating this new guy for less than a month now, and though we both seem to want to make it work, I feel we have pretty different communication styles. We've also been through quite a lot during the past few weeks which we may need help getting over. I'm incredibly bad at dating, inexperienced in romantic relationships and honestly want this to work. What do I do? [more inside]
Whenever I am anticipating a date with or a text from the guy that I'm with, I suddenly find myself avoiding everything I need to do in order to just mentally prep for that encounter. This is obviously not a productive or healthy way to anticipate a good thing, but I have acted this way since I was 16 and now at 26 I want to stop trying to be so damn available. Aside from keeping myself busy with obligations I MUST attend to lest there be Serious Repercussions, what else can I do to persuade my mind that living my life in the intervals will allow me to have better relationships, not the other way around?
My girlfriend has a diagnosed anxiety order. Oftentimes in conversation she has trouble processing what is said and pretty much shuts down. After the conversation she tells me that she was flooded and doesn't remember what we discussed. I want to learn more about psychological flooding. Can you help me find some resources to learn more about it? I didn't have much luck with my keyword searches on Google. Specifically I want to learn if there are ways I can help her become flooded less often. Thanks!
My brother needs resources to help him learn to be a better listener and friend to those he cares about. [more inside]
I work in benefits and messed up the life insurance amount for someone who died. Please help me figure out how to communicate this error to the beneficiary and upper management in the best way possible. [more inside]
I had a book release, reading, and signing party last night (it's a book I co-edited), and about halfway though the reading, one of the reader's husband pulled out his computer pad and turned it on, making all the start up noises. I find this rude and disrespectful; indeed, in the open mike culture here, people generally "respect the mike" and don't talk or take calls, but support the reader and give them energy (Energy begets energy). [more inside]
What do you think of the name "Rub" for a health spa? Is it cute or dirty and why?
Lately I've noticed it takes me a looong time to write emails- with a lot of time spent re-reading, editing, taking words out and putting them back in. I am self-conscious that my first pass is heavy on text - not good for conveying information efficiently to coworkers and supervisors. It's really getting in the way of my ability to be efficient at work and starting to show in my performance. What can I do to work on this? [more inside]
I have dated someone on and off for over a year, we have learned a lot about each other and have unfortunatly been through some ups and downs. We see each other coming out stronger than ever and working through everything but it is taking some time...I am fighting for this because I know what we have is special and what he provides me is what I have been looking for. [more inside]
I really could use advice on how to improve our sex life (NSFW and snowflakes) [more inside]
I'm not sure how to talk with my wife about the issues surrounding her long term unemployment. I don't want to come across as demanding or nagging, but I do want to express some concerns that I have honestly and clearly. How have you successfully communicated about this touchy subject with your significant other? [more inside]
I'm in a new relationship and we just had a fight that was started more or less because of an issue I've been struggling with my life: I never know what to say to people. How can I work through this issue? [more inside]
My friends just had the worst week of their lives and they are now separated from their 3yo son by a hospital and over a thousand miles. What are some ways he can show them love while they're apart? [more inside]
I started a new job last year and it's becoming clear that things are not going as planned. I'm dealing with a micro managing boss and I am at my wits end. Please help me decide if I should stay and work things out, or start job hunting for something better - wall of text inside. [more inside]
What is an effective way to speak to a new partner about bettering their ability to perform cunnilingus? [more inside]
I need an app for the IPhone that will allow my partner to press a single button to send me a pre-written text message or pre-determined photo. This will be a sort of personalized Bat Signal (we'll call it "The Clay Signal") and will let me know that she needs my attention. [more inside]
Struggling with my boyfriend's apparent lack of effort in our relationship, but I'm not sure if it's worth trying to work though, because he won't discuss if he have a future together. [more inside]
I have a problem with consistency in carrying out daily activities, particularly those that are communication-based such as responding to messages. I have missed out on business opportunities, hurt friendships, and am generally seen as unreliable due to my inability to respond to people's messages in a timely matter. This has got to change, but I'm not sure how and could use your help. [more inside]
I donated a lot of money to a small retail store for a Kickstarter campaign they ran. There were a lot of rewards offered, and I said I didn't want "all of them". But so far I've gotten none. I want to followup, because I'd like to continue to patronize this business. [more inside]
I might be getting a bit curmudgeonly in my graduate student years, but I'm starting to get annoyed at how many mass emails I get from my university. What should I be expecting here, and should I do anything about it? [more inside]
Sometimes someone does you wrong (most often in a relationship), and there is a desire to call them out, to write a scathing letter. Often it's advised to write it out but not send it. Can someone help me understand why? [more inside]
What's it really like living in extreme poverty in the developed (western) world? I am writing a dystopian sort of post-mini-apocalyptic novel. The themes are investigating something else, but for a realistic setting, I would like to know real stories (anecdotes & journalistic) about living in a contemporary semi-urban environment where resources are scarce. Stories detailing daily life post-katrina, war-torn environments in Europe, experiences of low income people who can not easily access nutritious food, medicine, clothing, information/Internet/tv - anything a middle class person in Australia might take for granted and not even consider - for example (can't remember source) a diabetic without regular power will be at extreme risk, because of an inability to securely store insulin. What's it like living in an environment where the invading force are unpredictable? What freedoms do you lose, what work arounds do you pursue? How differently does the community act, faced with these problems - and in what ways does it bring them together, and in what ways does it divide them? (I wish to avoid fictional accounts).
I've been dating a guy since the summer. I need help with asking for things I need in the relationship. [more inside]
Our non-profit [a Quaker Meeting] is looking to expand our online offerings, both internally--for our members and attenders [private forums, and possibly more real-time social features], and also a more friendly and informative public-facing website than we have now. Any of the solutions should be easy to administer for people with middling to pretty good internet/computer knowledge. We are looking at Google Apps for non-profits, but so far, I'm finding their Google Groups a pretty poor approximation of a web forum. So I'd like to know what other options may be out there for us. We'd ideally like a full-featured suite of products that can grow with us, but if we build something piecemeal, are probably most interested in first having a user-friendly but robust forum. Free is ideal, inexpensive could be considered, based on features. We are a 501(c)(3). Would love pointers to software or cloud solutions, but am also interested in exploring groups that are already using such software [if they are public].
Ethics and friendship filter. Help me find the courage to tell my friend that this introvert is not going to stay in a single hotel room with two double beds and three non related people. It's already been advanced booked and I'm expected to pay my share. [more inside]
How do you honestly and politely let someone know when you don't like something that they absolutely love without opening the door for them to try and convert you into liking it? [more inside]
Occasionally, I bring up the subject of sex with my partner, and I always get nowhere. Sex has never been something that we've really talked about. We had those first few conversations when we met several years ago: disclosures of risks, general preferences, expectations for monogamy, etc. and from there we just let it develop naturally. We need to talk about it because our sex life isn't meeting my needs, and I've asked to talk about it, but I still don't know how to talk about it, and I'm afraid this is just going to become another in a string of failed attempts to talk about sex. [more inside]
What is the difference between making excuses for someone's behavior and understanding where they are coming from? I don't have anything in particular in mind. I just see that phrase a lot on here and have heard it a lot. [more inside]
What strategies can I use to convince my husband to more openly discuss our household finances with me? [more inside]
We are a team of about 25 spread across two main locations with a single person in a third locale. We also use some outsourced resources now and again. We use a mish mash of tools to do everything from email (some of us use Outlook, others use Gmail with a forward, others use webmail/Zimbra, some use MacMail, etc.) to file sharing, chat and video conferencing. We need to get our act together and select the right tools. Help! [more inside]
Looking for a gaming console and games for almost 6 year old boy, with few issues to address/target. [more inside]
Can I explain to someone how their negative behaviors are putting me off, but maintain an amicable relationship with them? I get too emotional to find fair words. [more inside]
How come? How can I be more comfortable with this? [more inside]
Hi everyone, I'm hoping to find a picture or a scheme of some kind that illustrates effective communication techniques - or, alternately, pitfalls that should be avoided. [more inside]
I am looking for video clips of a specific kind of cross cultural communication gone bad: ones where a cultural outsider participates in a ceremony or ritual not understanding its full significance. [more inside]
I'm going to London from November 1st to November 7th and I want to be able to make and receive a few phone calls... [more inside]
What are some good resources on interpersonal communication that I can direct people to that they can read on their own time? [more inside]
I'm working on research related to a specific immigrant population and I'm not sure what to do to get to know people in that community, but I figure organizations that work with them might be a good place to start. Unfortunately I'm really shy and I need guidance or a script on how to do this so I don't avoid it forever. If you've worked at an organization like this or have done similar research, how do you start? [more inside]
How do presidents call other presidents? With last week's phone call between President Obama and Iranian President Hassan Rouhani, it got me wondering how do heads of state call other heads of state? I imagine that one executive suite's switchboard calls the other's, but what's the diplomatic protocol for who picks up the phone first? Do they have super-secret phone numbers, or even phone numbers in the way we think of them? Are the calls private, or are is there an entire entourage listening in? Do they just hang up when they're finished, or is their an entire protocol for ending the conversation? What are some of the other "hidden" aspects of executive diplomatic communication and behind-the-scenes goings-on are there that the rest of us commoners never see?
I want to use a Google Hangout "On Air" for a project, but a tiny limitation is getting in the way. I would like to bypass the 'Press to Talk' functionality with a tiny browser script/hack/modification. My programming knowledge is tiny, but I am sure this could be done super super simply with a script loaded in the browser. Perhaps there's better solution. Any ideas? [more inside]
Later tonight I will be going on a second date with a new guy that seems like a promising fit. One thing he brought up during the first date is that he's about to go to Amsterdam for a few days and that while there he's looking forward to relaxing and smoking pot. Pot use is a deal breaker for me, but I want to make sure I have all the facts before I let him know that. How do I collect that info respectfully, and then let him know that pot's a deal breaker for me without sounding really weird? [more inside]
Very soon, I will be in a position where I will need to help lead a major change in the workplace, and one where many of the people I work with will be unhappy. How do I do this? [more inside]
I'm interested in dating and otherwise be-friend a guy. We have common interests and he seems to be "nice" and has a high level of intelligence. That said - Every conversation revolves around him. I love to ask people questions and let them "talk freely about their life or whatever"... but at some point you want to have a two-sided conversation. How can I politely make this point without coming across in the wrong way? This is not someone I have known longer then a couple dates.
Can you build a successful romantic relationship without conversational "flow"? [more inside]
My fiancé is going on tour in support of a major pop act. This means consecutive three-month absences for the next year (maybe two) as she performs. This is her calling and her art and I support it 100%. Still, I dread her long absence and I am going to miss her as fiercely as I love her. I'm looking for ways to maintain our strength, equality, and communication, and to stave off problems that must arise. Particularly advice, anecdotes, and specific things that helped your (similar) relationship - or hurt it.
What are some great conversation starting questions to ask young people over dinner? [more inside]