Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with children

What kind of small pet should we get?

crios — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 11:36:06 -0800

We're looking for a good pet(s) for our family. Our 3 year old betta is about to die (it's just lying on the bottom of the bowl, not looking good at all). We're looking for a new pet to replace our betta. We live in a small apartment and my son and I are allergic to dogs and cats so those are out. We're looking for something that is kid friendly (in that they can participate in its care) and can live in a bowl/tank. We're looking for a pet that is relatively easy to take care of (I don't mind cleaning out the bowl/tank once a week or every other week), easy to feed (can buy food that will last a couple of months or can feed the pet something that we can buy at the store) and doesn't need a lot of space (we have a bowl and a tank the is 12" x 8" x 8" so something that can live in one of those). We don't mind buying a few extra things but we don't want to have to get a ton of extra equipment (rocks and plants are fine).

Some ideas we have been playing with: turtle(s), frog(s), mouse or hamster, lizard, fish (other than betta but something a little more interesting than a goldfish), some other kind of fresh water critter.

What kind of recommendations can metafilter make? Any animals highly recommended? Any animals we should avoid? We were kind of interested in a lizard or small snake but would we have to buy crickets or some other kind of critter to feed them?

Some other animal experience we have had: painted lady butterflys (caterpillar to chrysalis to butterfly, that one was fun), ant farm (no queen so they only lasted a couple of months, that was fun too, the kids loved watching them work).

Any advice is appreciated!

Disney version of the Monsanto Corporation story please.

querty — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 13:25:20 -0800

How would you explain to an 8 year old the practices of Monsanto? Basically need a kids-friendly, Disney / fairy tale / bedtime story version of Monsanto Corporation without mentioning the farmer suicides and keeping the politics to a minimum.

How to tell children about death book suggestions for a single dad

spec80 — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 05:15:12 -0800

A friend's father passed away suddenly and he is having difficulty formulating a way to tell his daughter. What books would you recommend? I have no experience with the death of a parent or being a parent. I don't know how to help other than lending a sympathetic ear.

Friend was pretty close with his dad and is using work to distract himself. He is a single dad and his two daughters live with their mom. He is concerned about how to tell his eldest daughter (ten years old) and help her cope/mourn because she knew and had a close relationship with her grandfather. She is aware of the concept of death and knows people that have died, but Friend says she's never had a relationship with those people. (Her mother lives in an area of NYC where violence is still prevalent.)

I searched previous questions and I am thinking of printing out this thread and maybe getting this book? Googling gives an overwhelming result and I was hoping someone could personally suggest a book. I cannot give a website, only printouts of a website because they don't have an internet/computer at home. Daughter might have access to one at school, but I am presuming.

Uncle Scrooge presents

Secret Life of Gravy — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 06:19:23 -0800

What to gift an 11 year old boy with too much stuff? My husband's nephew has divorced parents and doting grandparents, so every Xmas he makes out in the gift department. This year (as usual) we were given a list from his mother but the only things on the list are video games. We gave him 2 games last year. Undoubtedly he will get several games from others this year.

So we are left with a dilemma. Naturally we would like to give him a gift he would really be excited about and use, however my husband would like to give him something that will stand out and be memorable, possibly even give him something that won't be too exciting at Christmas, but will prove enduring. So my question is twofold: Should we just give him what he wants? If not, what are some ideas for something around $50.00? Bear in mind that my husband gave him one of his old guitars for nephew's birthday and is fixing up a used bike to give him just to have around.

Which movie are these images from?

fac21 — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 10:46:11 -0800

In this animated GIF, I assume the images of Seagal and the children getting shot are from different movies. Which movie are the images of the children from?

"easy" game on the PS2 for children?

thermonuclear.jive.turkey — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 08:48:25 -0800

Hi Can you recommend an "easy" game on the PS2 for children? (more...) Hi,

I have an action item, to buy a playstation 2 game for a child in elementary school. The child in question has complained that other games that the family owns, are too hard.

Specifically I think the issue revolves around games with puzzles in them - games like Up, Wall-e etc. are rated "E" but are puzzle-heavy (to proceed you need to figure out what to do, and how to do it...). Lego Star Wars, Katamari Damacy seem to be OK in terms of the level of difficulty and complexity. Need for Speed yes it's a Teen game is fine in terms of complexity, you're just driving around, but parts of it can be challenging for teens and adults to win, and losing more often than not is a source of frustration. There are similar issues for other racing games that the wee gamer has played.

So, can you recommend for me a straightforward game, one possibly aimed at a pre-teen gamers, with a modest level of complexity and difficulty?

I wipe my own ass!

alona — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 10:40:18 -0800

What are children of different cultures expected to learn to do independantly at different ages? For example, in most of Israel, kids by the second-third grade walk themselves to and from school.

This is just out of personal interest.

This is what sparked my interest.

Four Eyed Four Year Old

beachhead2 — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 09:35:28 -0800

My 4-year old daughter was diagnosed with accommodative esotropia. Any advice for the mom of an active young'n that will soon be bespectacled? Her right eye has been crossing for a few weeks. She is apparently far sighted and may need bifocals. The doctor said the glasses may actually make the eye crossing worse when she takes off her glasses (but correct it completely when wearing, obviously). The doc also said current surgery is not an option for her.

She is a very active child. She participates in gymnastics and swimming currently...soccer in the spring and fall.

I have worn glasses since I was 8, but I am nearsighted. My eyes are quite bad and have been since then. I remember frustration on my part from dealing with glasses while playing, swimming, etc. I remember frustrated parents, dealing with lost or broken glasses and eventually lost contacts. Any thoughts/ advice is appreciated!

I’m concerned my son’s nanny may have hit him – how can I tell for sure?

Anonymous — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 08:31:46 -0800

My four year old alleges our new nanny called him, “stupid” and hit him. He is generally a reliable narrator, but he is only four. How do I find out for sure? Apologies in advance for the copious details inside. I apologize in advance that this requires a great deal of set up, and I did search through all of the previous askmes with the keyword “abuse” in them. My username here is consistent across many internet fora, hence the anonymity.

I have two sons, ages 4 and 6. Both my wife and I work full time out of the house, and 6 weeks ago we hired a local nanny who is an undergraduate and originally from our neighborhood. She is pleasant and appears to be caring and contentious (e.g., very good at helping the boys with their homework). This is her first position as a caregiver.

Two days ago my wife told me our 4 year old said he had a “red” lip because the nanny had called him “stupid” and hit him in while they were in the car on the way to pick up my 6 year old (so the 6 year old was not a witness). I would not get a chance to speak to either of them until yesterday. Neither my wife nor I saw any evidence he'd been hit; he looked just fine.

Yesterday I took an early train to arrive home unexpected. My 4 year old was crying and had a very swollen lip and an abrasion on his nose. He told me he fell, and later talking to the nanny and my oldest son (who was in there at the time), it appears that he really did fall while getting out of the car. The nanny’s, and both my oldest and youngest son’s stories about what happened are completely consistent. My oldest was in the car, but did not witness the actual fall (he was getting out of the other side of the car at the time.)

Even more set up (sorry!): I am a commercial intelligence investigator/analyst, a HUMINT practitioner and have advanced qualitative research training (i.e., focus groups). I say this to indicate that I have years of experience eliciting responses without biasing the answers. It’s also to indicate I’m keenly, and in this case horrendously aware, of my limitations in this regard. Especially as children are notoriously difficult to interview.

I’ve talked to both my sons now in a variety of contexts over the last two days. Here’s what I know:

- My youngest’s story of the calling stupid and hitting has remained completely consistent, and he does not appear to have any kind of motive behind telling the story (e.g., getting the nanny in trouble, getting special treatment). He says it was on purpose, she did not “say sorry,” and was in response to him moving his head about too much in the car (something he does)

- My oldest says that the nanny has never been angry with them or raised her voice or in any way told him not to tell his parents anything (this was insanely difficult to get without asking obviously leading questions, but fortunately my 6 year old is highly verbally and analytically gifted.)

- Both my wife and I are 99% convinced that he really did fall out of the car the day after the alleged hitting incident. There was no duplicity in the nanny when I asked about it, both son’s story’s are consistent and plausible, and his injury is consistent with what they described (although it could be consistent with other things too).

- My youngest, the alleged victim, is smart but lags behind a bit on the whole linear time and efficient causality stuff. He is not an unreliable narrator nor is he prone to exaggeration or lying.

So how do I tell what really happened? I will only get one shot to speak to the nanny on this. If she really hit him, that indicates to me that she may have a Jekyll Hyde personality thing going on (she has never appeared to be anything but sweet to us and the boys), which means that if she really did hit him, she’ll just be much more careful to make sure we never find out about it. If she didn’t do it, well, I wouldn’t be surprised if she just walked off the job, which would cause serious problems work-wise for my wife and me. And the last thing in the world I want are some kind of false allegations against an innocent woman and all the implications that entails.

I’m considering talking to her tomorrow (she’s not working today.) Any suggestions at all would be appreciated

Help me ID a kid's book about colors

range — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 11:44:18 -0800

Name-that-book-Filter: Large-format children's book, all about colors Helping a friend find a favorite childhood book, so she can give it to my son. Here's what she remembers:

Big format (compared to a 3-4 year old kid)

It's about colors, with each set of pages dedicated to one color

The drawings were really detailed

There may or may not have been words on the pages (I only remembers the pictures)

I think there was a big paintbrush or something involved

I especially remember the white page

"Color" is one of those ubiquitous words that is useless for google. Parameters this vague scream out, "Help me, hive mind!"

Music/musicians or music & kids related charities?

You Should See the Other Guy — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 16:19:23 -0800

This season I would like to raise funds for a music/musicians or music and kids related charity. I'm aware of Sweet Relief, Music Box Children's Charity, and Rock for Kids. What are some others that you would recommend? In addition, there was a music/kids related post on the blue I can't find... an older guy who makes instruments for free--hundreds over the years... anyone recall? Thanks!

Simple Magic Tricks anyone?

AzzaMcKazza — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 05:02:59 -0800

I am in need of some new simple magic tricks capable of impressing young children and inebriated adults. So I've worked in childcare for around 8 years now and I've gathered a simple set of magic tricks that I've found win the attention and interest of the very young. I've been using these for awhile now and I've found that at least one of the tricks is capable of winning over even the toughest and most disinterested under-5. The problem is that I've done the shtick so much that I've grown bored of my own routine - regardless of how much I amaze a new audience.

My shtick consists of three classics...

The Old "Oooh look I can take my thumb off" Grandpa trick

The "Check it out I can stick a pencil up my nose, and out of my mouth and in my ear and out my mouth and in my eye " gag - Best used for over fives. Though in my history I've only had one kid try to copy me ( I stopped him in time). Nowadays I just tell the kids that they need to go to Hogwarts to learn how to do it and they must never, ever try the trick until they have.

and

The Amazing "Check it out I have a coin/rock/piece of lego in my hand, I've grabbed it with my other hand and "Wowee" it's disappeared" routine. - Very simple, but amazingly effective. Works on adults too.

So....Does anyone know of any other very simple prop (or not) based magic that is easy to learn and easy to impress? Surely there must be some cheeky Magical Mefites out there?

"Fathers be good to your daughters / Daughters will love like you do"

rmm — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 15:59:01 -0800

Found long lost dad - now what? Hi Mefis,

I'm hoping to get some perspective here on what to do, especially from folks who have found long lost relatives and how they've dealt with reconnecting. I tend to turn here when I have a question, so I figured, 'why not again' since in some ways this is the ultimate Meta thing to find and deal with.

So after putting it off for years, I finally traced my father's wearabouts - the last time I saw him in person was 13 years ago, and he had basically dropped off the face of the earth (no forwarding address, very little contact with my family over the years). My parents split when I was very young, and he left town without providing child support. As a result my mother scrapped by providing for my half sister and I. I saw him a few times when I was still a child after that initial split, but I don't remember them very clearly - they were kind of a 'he breezes into town and gives us $100 and a stuffed toy' type moments. He wrote occasionally to me over the years to say how he loved me, but contact was minimal. Needless to say I have a therapist whom I'm working with to deal with my issues of feeling abandoned, fear of commitment, etc. stemming from not having a father, or an absent one at best.

My mother asked me never to contact him - I think she was still upset about the split, which was very hostile. They never divorced - she was so upset by the experience she didn't even bother to formally divorce him. Unfortunately she died earlier this year, and curiosity got the better of me - I hired a private investigator, who found that my father is in my old hometown. The question is what to do next. I'll be visiting my hometown for the holidays and can't decide what to do next - and what's the best thing for both parties. He'd be 76, and while I'm angry he left us, I'm exactly not wild about just barging into his life after all these years with a bunch of questions. He's 76 - how well is he going to be? I don't want to make an already stressful time of the year even more stressful by reentering his life, and I have no intention of making this a miserable experience for either party. Having said that, he's got to have expected that his daughter would want to meet him eventually, right? And I have a bunch of questions that feel reasonable to want to have answered. Some of the questions are practical - like finding out my family's medical history on his side, since I know nothing about it. Some of the questions though are very emotional in nature - finding out why he left, what's he like (personality wise), and I guess some sort of sense that he regrets not being in my life. I'm trying to be open minded in the experience, and realize that the results may not be ideal - that he may not feel like he did anything wrong, that he may not want to meet, that this is just an opportunity and nothing more, and to go into it as being a positive experience regardless of the outcome. I know as an adult that most things in life (and relationships especially) aren't black or white but grey - he could be feeling shame at leaving us, uncertain at contacting me, etc. etc.

So what are my options? Do I write him beforehand, telling him I'll be in town and that I'd like to meet for coffee? Do I try and call him instead - although that's not necessarily an option, since he apparently didn't pick up the phone when the private investigator called. Do I just show up on his doorstep and hope for the best? Or do I do nothing - just let sleeping dogs lie, and resign myself to never knowing about him? There are other options I can use - i.e. in-laws and family friends who are willing to run 'interference' and show up with me to at a coffee shop if he wants to meet. Would that be smart to do? I feel like I'm never going to have resolution on this issue until I meet him - and even if he turned out to be a total jerk, at least I can say, 'well, I met my dad, and he was a jerk', and at least I'd know it. Is it selfish of me to be doing this at this point in my life? If you've gone through this experience, what did you say or do at the time to make it easier on both of you?

I appreciate any advice especially from those who've been there. You can Mefi mail me if you'd prefer to take this offline. Thanks!

How often do people change their minds about starting a family?

lilyflower — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 07:39:23 -0800

How often do people change their minds about starting a family? I have heard a lot of anecdotal evidence that people in their twenties say that they don't want to have children, and then reach their thirties and start a family. I have also heard many people saying to those who are ambivalent about children that "they will change their minds."

I would really like to find out if there have been any studies which have tracked people’s opinions on whether they "do want kids" or "do not want kids" and how those opinions may change over the years.

Does anyone know of any studies that have been done which asked people this sort of question?

I would also be interested in stats which consider people changing their mind due to meeting “the one”, men who get convinced by their female partners because now she definitely wants to have a child, and women who change their minds and put it down to “baby fever” or their "biological clock." I am particularly interested in studies which determine what proportion of people who say they don't want kids remain childfree.

I have read lots of threads on AskMefi about people being unsure and asking for advice, people who have answered included those who have become parents and say that they made a good decision, as do those who have remained childfree. Although anecdotes might suggest that "you'll change you're mind" most of the time, without having some idea of the change rate from statistical analysis I am less inclined to accept the premise as one size fits all.

Thank you in advance for your assistance.

How to make amends for disruptive behavior in a library?

Jpfed — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 11:13:22 -0800

A group of 11-year-old kids under my wife's supervision got out of control and were disruptive to the library they were meeting in. How can we make it up to the library/ its patrons, and ensure that something like this doesn't happen again? My wife is a newly-minted Girl Scout leader (in the last couple months or so). The troop that she leads has been meeting at a nearby library for some time (for a few years). At their last meeting, the girls got very loud; their sounds carried from their closed room to the farthest corners of the library. The people working at the library were not happy with the situation, but they gave no indication that the troop was no longer welcome at the library. My wife apologized for their conduct, but she's still mortified, and is too embarrassed to go to the library again without making some sort of change to the situation- either a new method of interacting with the girls, some sort of gesture to the library, or both. She may attempt to find a new meeting spot for the girls, but she still wants to make amends to the library.

Some background (please note that this is almost entirely second-hand through my wife):

The girls are mostly a set of mutual friends that don't see each other much outside of Girl Scouts. They don't seem to see Girl Scouts as a vehicle for learning/ new activities, so much as an opportunity to socialize. An appreciable number of them seem to compete to be the center of attention, resulting in escalating loudness pretty much whereever they go. Among the girls in the troop is my stepdaughter, who is a little loud herself, though by no means the loudest or least controlled of the group.

My wife is frustrated that, for years now, this particular troop hasn't focused around building skills or developing character or anything that she thought the Girl Scouts were about. She's been frustrated with the previous Girl Scout leaders and what she thought was their incompetence, but now that she's in the leadership position herself, she admits that she still has learning to do about how to get these kids to behave more appropriately.

So, back to the question. I suggested to my wife that perhaps she could kill a few birds with one stone by getting the kids to organize a book drive for the library, but after reading this, I'm not sure that's a good idea. What can we do to make it up to the library and avoid causing problems for them in the future? If it's something that encourages personal development for the girls, that's a great bonus, but it's not a necessary component of the question. This question is intended to be fairly open-ended; if you feel the need to question my premises or address something that you feel I haven't given due attention to, that's okay by me. This is my first post to AskMe, so I apologize in advance if this is poorly worded or inappropriate.

Opera for kids.

eyeballkid — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 10:00:43 -0800

Opera suggestions for children. I have a four-year-old boy who recently heard opera-styled vocals and was immediately mesmerized by it. He was also entranced by YouTube videos I found by just searching for opera.

I know next to nothing about opera and I need suggestions for pieces that would interest a kid. I'd prefer bouncier, lighter pieces and let him save the darker, more dramatic selections for when he's an emo teen.

YouTube examples are welcome, but what I'm really looking for is audio, either single mp3s or full performances.

Tell me how to choose a child/family therapist.

Anonymous — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 08:05:56 -0800

Should I go for the in-plan, cheap co-pay therapist or pony up more cash for the therapist who seems a better fit for my family? Would it be bad to switch therapists shortly into the process? My family needs some help from a therapist. Specifically, my daughter needs some help. She's young (in elementary school), and she was adopted into our family a few years ago. It was a huge trauma for her, and we're all still dealing with the after effects, including huge and frequent tantrums and bedwetting that would be more typical in a child much younger than she is (among other issues). She's still grieving and she's really suffering.

My understanding is that children who were adopted do best when dealing with therapists who understand adoption and how that can hurt a child years after the actual adoption, and so I would like a therapist who has worked with similar issues and similar kids.

I have a pretty good health plan for mental health issues. However, in my area, there are only one or two therapists who are in network, with a reasonable co-pay (around $15), who work with kids and who seem to have knowledge about adoption. I haven't spoken with any of them yet.

There's another practice in my area which specializes in dealing with adoption and dealing with kids who are in foster care or who were adopted. They work with everyone in the adoption triad (ie adoptive parents, kids, birth/first parents). They are out-of-network. My insurance company would cover some of the fees, but we might be looking at $60+ per session.

My inclination is to go right to the therapists who specialize in adoption. But should we give an in-network therapist a try first? Being able to have a low copay would probably mean we could afford much more therapy for much longer.

Will it mess up my daughter if we start with one therapist and switch?

I'd welcome any advice you have on choosing a therapist, especially one who works with kids. Thanks.

What can I buy a boy recovering from a tonsillectomy?

gabrielsamoza — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 06:13:09 -0800

What can I buy a boy recovering from a tonsillectomy? My best friend's four year old son will have his tonsils removed soon. The plan is for him to stay home from nursery school for a week, and, as I really like this kid, I'd like to make him a package of things that will help him pass the time and have fun while recovering.

His tastes seem pretty standard for his age. From babysitting him I know he especially likes race cars, blocks, dinosaurs, airplanes, and pretend sword-fighting. For his recent birthday he got a Playmobil Egyptian pyramid set-up that he adores.

Here are the things I've thought of so far: more Playmobil toys, astronaut ice cream, a book on how to make paper airplanes, and a Scooby Doo DVD.

What else can I get him? If you were a sick four year old boy, what would make you smile?

My overall budget for this is $100, so no one thing should cost more than ~$25.

Is marketing fast food by public schools a common thing?

dejah420 — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 17:22:35 -0800

Is it common for public schools to directly market fast food to children under the guise of "school spirit"? My son started 1st grade at public school this year. So far, about once a month, the Chick-fil-A cow shows up at their school, wanders the hall and hands out these fliers that say that the class with the most kids that show up and order fast food on Date X wins a free chicken nugget party with said cow and a free recess. The class in second place of the spending race gets a free recess.

Not only that, but he brings home fliers from the school that announce that "spirit night" is coming. Today, we got a call (from the system that I thought was designed to only be an emergency announcement system) that reminded us to go to Chick-fil-A and spend money. Then, when I picked him up from school, he and all the other kids were plastered with a giant branding sticker in the center of their little chests reminding the parents to take their kids to Chick-fil-A tonight.

He was heartbroken when I told him that we would not be going. Apparently, they've been drilling them all week about getting a "free party" and a "get out of class free" period.

Is this as outrageous as I think it is? Is it common, and I'm just overreacting?

My opinion is that I should call the ISD superintendent to inquire why the school is trying to turn my kid into a mindless fast-food eating consumer-bot. But other parents around here don't seem to think it's an issue, and in fact were taking pictures of their kids covered in branding standing next to the cow when school let out today.

Before I go all crusader on the school district, am I being irrational about this?

(For the record; I didn't have an issue with this company before all this marketing to my kid started, and tonight as I was trying to google whether this sort of marketing was common, I came across the information that Chick-fil-A supports tea-baggers and funds homophobic organizations...so thanks to their aggressive marketing to my 6 year old kid, they're now added to my ever growing "boycott" list.)

Philosophy and critical thinking for younger kids

crapmatic — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:20:17 -0800

What are some good ideas (web resources, books, suggestions, etc) for introducing a 6 to 7 year old child to elements of philosophy, paradoxes, and critical thinking? This is probably too young of an age to actually study the topics directly, but there have to be thought exercises and stories out there that distill the essence of these things in an entertaining or captivating way. I've Googled a bit but found mostly dry lesson-plan type stuff for classes. I know Aesop's Fables is a classic allegory for kids but that focuses mostly on morals.

COPPA and non-US websites

lwb — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 07:55:48 -0800

Is a site based outside of the US, that allows US under-13s to join, required to comply with COPPA? To me, question 19. of the COPPA FAQ's seems to clearly state that it would be - "Foreign-based websites must comply with COPPA and the Rule if they are directed to children in the United States, or if they knowingly collect personal information from children in the U.S.". However, the co-owner of the (still in development, at this point) website, insists that US law cannot possibly apply to a website run from outside of the US. So, I am wondering if I am misinterpreting this quote.

If it makes a difference (because what I read of COPPA refers to operators that are "involved in commerce" in the UnitI'ed States), the site will be free to join but will also have a paid membership option for extra content.

I do intend to meet with a lawyer to check over things before we launch, but for a number of reasons this won't happen for a while, and it'd be very helpful to know the answer to this question before then.

I would also appreciate links to any resources explaining these matters. "Internet Law for Dummies", if you will.

Under what circumstances (if any) can a child in the UK be legally allowed to play a video game which, under the legally enforceable games ratings system, they are not old enough to buy?

Anonymous — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 08:26:02 -0800

Under what circumstances (if any) can a child in the UK be legally allowed to play a video game which, under the legally enforceable games ratings system, they are not old enough to buy? In the past we have run sessions for children aged 10-16 with a video game rated 12+ under the PEGI system. At the time these sessions were run, the PEGI system was an entirely voluntary system in the UK, where these sessions took place. However, as of September 2009, the PEGI system is now legally enforceable for video games. This means that to sell a game with a 12+ PEGI rating to an 11-year old child would now be a criminal offence.

(For what it's worth, we ran these sessions for the purposes of educational research, and if it is legally possible are interested in running more for the same reason.)

I have several questions around this that I'd be grateful if the hive mind could help me with:

1. Am I right in assuming that we're fine legally for the past sessions we already ran? This has involved kids under the age of 12 playing and taking home (non-pirated, and bought by us) copies of the game software, which they presumably still have.

2. Does the legally enforceable nature of the PEGI system apply retroactively? That is, can games released BEFORE September 2009 with a 12+ rating now not be sold to children, or is it only games released after the new system took effect?

3. Is buying a 12+ game for the purposes of allowing a child to use it now illegal in the same way that selling that game directly to the child would be?

4. Is there any way for us to legally run further sessions with 12+ rated software and children under the age of 12? (In this hypothetical scenario the children would be provided with the game, rather than buying it.) Could parents give their consent for their children to use such a game, in the context of a workshop they have to explicitly sign their kids up for? Could a school agree to allow the children to use such software in classrooms? Are there any legal options here?

Thanks in advance everyone, your help is greatly appreciated.

What should my son's first computer be?

emjaybee — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 12:41:00 -0800

What should my son's first computer be? Or rather, should it be a computer at all?

He's four, and expressing an interest in playing online Sesame Street games, etc. on our computers, but he's a little rough on things and I have no desire to have ours trashed. Plus my Mac mouse makes things hard, the whole no-obvious-button to click is confusing.

Should we get some of those semi-computer toys that you see in stores, and if so, any recommendations? Or start with a gaming system, even? (we don't have one). I want him to learn keyboard, mouse, monitor, etc. He doesn't read yet, just recognizes letters and numbers. Not wanting to blow big bucks.

Any suggestions?

How can I talk to children?

meadowlark lime — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 11:16:01 -0800

How can I talk to children? I'm working on some writing projects that require me to know how children talk. I think I have a fairly good ear and memory for it from my own childhood, but you inevitably forget things, or you never would have noticed certain patterns when you were a child.

I would like to speak to children aged 6 - 13. I cannot think of a direct way to do this. Obviously, I'm not going to be the creepy guy lurking around a playground with an open notebook. I think observing classrooms would help, but I don't know any teachers who live near me.

What I'd like to do is to be able to sit down with some kids with a tape recorder running and just talk to them in a free-ranging way. How can I set something like this up? I don't want people to think that I am doing market research for some corporate product, or misrepresent my intentions in any way. Do you think there is some kind of school / church / community group that would let an outsider come in to talk to kids?

One Day in the Life of Ivan Desnakeovich?

256 — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 08:07:37 -0800

YAWTBF (Yet Another "What's That Book?" Filter): I'm trying to find a book that I loved as a child (early '80s). The book was written from the perspective of a garter snake as he slithered around a little chunk of wilderness bordered by a road. The story showed us one day in this snake's life. The snake encountered several other animals during the day including a skunk and a bunch of other snakes. The book was somewhat remarkable for how little it anthropomorphized the animals. The snake did have a human-like internal monologue, but all of the behaviours and interactions of the animals were strictly animal-like; no Beatrix Potteresque waistcoats-and-tea business.

As I recall, the book was maybe 80 pages long in hardback and was intermittently illustrated with simple line drawings.

I know that's not much to go on, but I've been regularly surprised at the hive mind's book-ID powers in previous askmes.