My mother is not coping well with my grandmother's impending death. My mother and I have a complicated and not particularly close relationship, and her coping style is hitting a lot of nerves about the crappier aspects of my childhood and I'm finding it really difficult to support her while keeping my own head above water. Any advice or stories from people who can relate would be appreciated. Wall of snowflakes below the cut. [more inside]
I've got a niece coming into the world soon, and as a gift for the shower, I was thinking of sending along a package of some of the books we were read as small children ourselves, as well as some newer books. Trouble is, I can really only remember two: The Poky Little Puppy and Mike Thaler's Owly (not the more recent comic book). Are there any other classic early childhood books that I should be sure to include?
After twelve years of silence, an abusive father has been aggressively trying to get in touch. [more inside]
Today my sibling has decided to cut ties with me. I am devastated and at an utter loss on how to handle some of the finer social details. [more inside]
Help me experience the reading I missed out on as a child. [more inside]
I've seen the recommendation on here for The Drama of the Gifted Child many times. I bought it last night and was reading thru it and it seemed ok until I started seeing a lot of talk about repressed memories. Wasn't that all debunked? I'm questioning the validity of anything else the author says. This is just not the book I expected based on the numerous and repeated mentions of it here on the green. [more inside]
I basically spent the past nine years of my life skimming forum posts and otherwise wasting my time on the Internet. How can I get past this and stop hating myself? [more inside]
A little over two years ago I posted a question regarding a very difficult situation I was in. The result is - eventually after much trauma we got divorced. Two years have passed and whilst in some respects I have made progress, a terrible situation has now occured and I am weighed down with the weight of the world. Desperately need some hivemind perspective if possible. [more inside]
It was a scary story, maybe a folk-tale, that was part of a collection geared towards children. A child's mother is replaced by some kind of cat-like doppelganger, and the child knows because of the replacement mother's mouth (full of tiny sharp teeth) and her constant craving for fish. I believe the story was set somewhere in Asia...either China or Japan. Sound familiar?
My son has social delays that make making friends hard. He was finally on his way to making a real friend, and I (his mother) ruined it by inadvertently alienating the other child's mother. I can't fix it. How do I live with it? [more inside]
I have lately and coincidentally been reading (American) pre-Civil War history and also some Transcendentalist work and fiction from the era. One thing I've noticed is how often prominent abolitionists and Transcendentalists are noted as being unusually indulgent towards their children; the point is often echoed in fiction of the era. Can you point me to any studies or commentary on the relationship between abolitionist thought and attitudes towards childhood? (Any country is okay!) [more inside]
A trope in our media and culture is that little girls disport themselves by holding mock tea parties with stuffed animals as the party guests. Two questions: ① Do 21st-century children actually do this? ② If so, how do they get the idea for it? Just from popular culture in which the trope is portrayed, or do some adults not in my social circle still actually hold tea parties which they're imitating,† or is it all via parents and siblings and peers communicating the idea to play this way? Or maybe toy manufacturers and advertising of tea-party-related toys and accessories? [more inside]
There are possible [triggers] inside. I'd like advice and resources on healing and reconnecting after past familial abuse, when I want to bond with my family and keep them in my life. [more inside]
My partner and I were remembering our differing childhood experiences of homemade spaghetti. At one point, she brought up using the leftovers in a spaghetti sandwich. I've never had one, but this triggered a vivid memory of a favorite picture book which had at least one illustration of a spaghetti sandwich. Among other odd sandwiches, possibly. I'd love to remember the title of the book and, ideally, see that illustration. [more inside]
I have long-running case of depression and generalized anxiety disorder, with plenty of childhood triggers. I do see a therapist but due to the holiday schedule, I won't be seeing my therapist for a few weeks. I want to do some work by myself, because crying to sleep nearly every night is getting exhausting. I want my subconsciousness to chill out and be less triggered. I want tips, stories, and resources. Difficulty: I live with my parents, and I get triggered by them. [more inside]
My husband and I have been married 15 years and we have an 8-year-old daughter. She is incredibly intelligent and receives straight As in school. She participates in the gifted program and reads at a 6th grade level. She has always been an intense child -- one who feels emotions strongly. But after we moved about a year ago, things started to move up a notch and third grade has been very difficult. She has these meltdowns, usually over small things. [more inside]
I was given this book in the early 80s. It was a large, hard covered book with beautiful illustrations. It was about a girl who visits her grandmother. While there she sees another girl outside. She takes a pram out and goes for a walk with this other little girl. [more inside]
How would one erase or get past a childhood trauma and its effects on one's relationship with food and money? [more inside]
I was a raging fan of several different media properties as a kid. I'd like to read or learn more about individuals who are likewise obsessed. [more inside]
Lately I've been reading novels and memoirs about unconventional/rough upbringings. Please help me find more! I especially liked The God of War, so more books with the same "feel" would be welcome. [more inside]
I had a random childhood recollection pop into my head recently that I haven't found the answer to. I was in the Girl Scouts for a few years in the early 90s. In addition to the cookie sale, we sold wall size and pocket size calendars as a fundraiser. When did GS stop doing the calendar fundraiser? I was in the Colonial Coast Council if it's relevant.
My (boy / girl) twins will be entering kindergarten this September. We've been asked if we want them placed into separate classes, or left together in the same class. Need to give them our answer by Monday and frankly, I'm at a loss and have no idea what I should do. If you are a parent of school-age or older twins, can you please share what you did and why? If you yourself are a twin, how did your parents handle it? How did it work out? Other knowledgeable anecdotes and advice welcome. Links to any online resources I can read on the topic would also be appreciated.
How to deal with being (emotionally) alone during this transitional phase of my life? [more inside]
Singlefatherfilter: I am soon to be a divorced father to a 3 year old son and a 5 year old daughter. After the initial shock of separation a routine is thankfully starting to be enacted. As you can imagine the time I spend with them is incredibly precious to me and I would appreciate some ideas on how I can record this best. I enjoy photography but there are two issues i) My daughter specifically is at that age where she knows when a photo is been taken and will pull a face, of course her brother follows suit. ii) Whilst I can take photos of them, it is nigh on impossible to take one of all of us together. As I get older rather than rely on my memory I would love to have some beautiful shots detailing this all too short period of childhood. I have had an idea about asking a photographer to take some photos but I do not want a set of posed photos. I cannot imagine I am the first to find themselves in this situation but I would appreciate any hive-mind suggestions.
My four-year-old son’s birthday is in late November. In our state, that means we can choose whether he starts (all-day) kindergarten this coming fall, when he’s 4-going-on-5, or next year, when he’ll be 5-going-on-6. I’m pretty paralyzed over this decision. I’m looking for insights, especially those with some sort of data behind them, to help. [more inside]
If your kindergarten-aged child chewed on their shirt sleeves or collar, how did you get them to stop?
For a short story I'm writing, my narrator/main character has an interaction with a sorceress that feels quite magical to her. I'm struggling to find the right child-sized (she's probably 5 or 6) language with which to describe the moment, so I thought I'd crowd-source this one. What are some magical things you remember happening to you as a child, and how did you describe them? How would you describe them now? (Alternately, if you can think of another writer who does this well, feel free to point me in that direction.) My story is present-day. I can say more about the magical incident, but I'd rather keep it vague and open at first unless you guys need more detail to be helpful. Thank you!
My parents never had careers. I would like to. Most career advice doesn't make any sense to me, and I'd love your thoughts on the matter. [more inside]
When I was in third grade, I read a book of scary stories. It was certainly a book for children. On the cover was a humanoid monster with black and blue fur. It was snarling in front of a green sky over a green field. The field may have been a graveyard. One of the stories was about a house in which a murder occurred. I don't remember the title. Does the description sound familiar to anyone else?
I'm trying to find the name of a dinosaur record that I listened to endlessly as a kid in 1980 or so. It was a 2-record set, I recall the covers (or the records?) being one red and one green. Songs and maybe some narrated info on various dinosaurs. I'm nearly certain it wasn't The Dinosaur Record. Anyone here happen to remember it? And if not, anyone with a tip on a shop that specializes in long-ago children's music that might be able to help me identify it?
During elementary school, my parents had me tested with a private psychologist in Fairfax County, Virginia, so that I could be admitted to the public school district's Gifted and Talented program. I took the Wechsler Intelligence Scale for Children, Stanford-Binet, and Otis-Lennon between 1992-1993. Would anybody be able to guide me in obtaning copies of these test scores as an adult? [more inside]
Help me identify this book? Hardback, with illustrations of towns & shops; lots of detail, kind of cartoony, escalators & stairs crossing. 1960s/70s? Know it's not much to go on, but it's all he gave me. Have at it guys.
What is the most awesome gift I can give a two year old these days? [more inside]
Drama of the Gifted Child: does it have practical applications? [more inside]
Why did girls used to smell like girls? [more inside]
Any special must sees for a whistle stop 48 hour tour of Paris with a 5 year old and 3 year old? [more inside]
How might you cope, if you were traumatized as a child by something you saw...? [more inside]
Rocket Slide! Any idea what company originally made this badass rocket slide? They were placed in community parks in the 1970s. Looking for the original manufacturer. My google-fu fails me.
Can you help me find (a) Mr. Bun? Beloved childhood toy, gone these many years.... [more inside]
Is this dissociation? I would really like to learn more about my slightly peculiar experience of living life, and what it means, if anything. I've been suspecting some form of dissociation, but I'd love some pointers to books, articles or sites, or informed experiences that might help make things clearer. [more inside]
I've been married to my wife for a few years, but she confessed to me recently that a neighbor molested her when she was a child. How can I respond to this in a helpful, supportive way? [more inside]
I buried a time capsule in our backyard 25 years ago. I'm not sure I remember where I buried it. Can you help me find it without tearing up the yard? [more inside]
My mom has sold my childhood home :( I want to leave a 'time machine' box with small objects in a place where it may or may not be found.... I want to write something but I'm at a loss for words... Can you suggest a poem? [more inside]
Are there recommended books for adult children of alcoholics? [more inside]
Help me tame our 7 year old daughter before she makes all of the boys in her second grade class cry. [more inside]
I would like to photograph what it feels like to be hugged (be the huggee). I'm looking for inspiration. Have you ever seen a photo or film shot that captures this feeling? [more inside]
How do you deal with childhood feelings of being creeped out by a family friend, but no recollection of anything inappropriate ever happening? [more inside]
How did your parents make Santa Claus real for you? [more inside]
Which of the Babar books deal with death? This question stems from a childhood anecdote that goes a little something like this . . . [more inside]
Thinking in context of "Maslow's hierarchy of needs" (the pyramid) - can voids be filled? If so how did you succeed in it? [more inside]