Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with career

Is going back to school really worth it?

PrettyKnitty — Wed, 22 May 2013 11:00:27 -0800

I am 28 years old and just completed my first semester of college, which I was unable to do when I was younger for a variety of reasons. Is this is a good idea? Much, much more detail inside. I was raised in an extremely fundamentalist Christian household. Going to college, especially as a female person, was just not something you could do (or at least I was led to believe). I had no idea of the existence of student loans, for example. I thought people had to pay their entire tuition upfront. (I also thought that dinosaurs walked around with people, but I digress.....)

Over the years, I've worked a variety of (mostly retail) jobs, where I met other people and was exposed to some other facets of life. That, and meeting my husband was my first exposure to other ideas, and I came to realize the world wasn't such a scary place; I had some options!

Fast forward several years, and I was able to extricate myself from the terrible church situation. That was 2010. I wanted very badly to start college, as it was something I had always wanted to do. Unfortunately, at that time, I was employed as a nanny, and worked too late in the evening to allow me to make it to classes at the local community college. My husband and I were barely scraping by, both working low paying jobs.

In 2012, after a variety of factors, we were forced to move back in with my parents, as my husband has not been able to find full time employment, and his student loan (a private loan) was pretty oppressive on top of our other expenses. Finally, I can work less hours, although I still have to work since we have a car payment, student loan debt, and my father wants a fairly significant rent.

So, with that background in mind, I am trying to figure out if I am on a good path. I am attempting to study towards my BS in Computer Engineering, since I am good at math, and have enjoyed playing with python in my spare time. The community college I attend has a dual enrolment with a state school, so all credits earned there will go toward completing my degree.

I guess my real question is, is this a good idea? I am fairly isolated, being introverted and don't have anyone who could be a "mentor" figure in my life. Both my parents, and my husbands parents have always worked low wage, low skill jobs, and 3 out of 4 never even completed high school. I literally don't know a single person who has a similar job. Is going to school worth it? I am concerned with my age (28) and lack of experience in any type of professional job. Will people want to hire a 32 year old new graduate? I have a lot of anxiety that it is already too late for me.

One thing I am totally uninterested in is continuing in nannying or any other type of child care.....I don't want children of my own, and even though I love the children, I do not want to continue down this path as a career. I am also very tired of the changing nature of the job, and the lack of health insurance and benefits. I had no idea what I was getting into when I started, I was just beyond tired of retail.

Sorry for the length, and I deeply, deeply appreciate any ideas, thoughts, experience or ideas that others could impart about my future plans, or anything I could try to do now.

What strategies can I use to successfully do a job I don't like?

lastwomanstanding — Tue, 21 May 2013 17:52:09 -0800

I need help constructing mental snowshoes that will prevent me from falling into deep drifts of work BS and frustration at a job I can't leave. I have spent more than a decade working in a field I finally realized I don't like. I have identified a new career and am now beginning the long process of taking prereqs so I can go back to school (it's health care so a degree is a must) and embark on this new career. I'm already taking a class and am very excited about this career plan.

The problem is: how to deal with a job I hate in the meantime? I need to work fulltime for at least another year while finishing the prereqs at night. I have a family and my spouse is only employed part time, with no immediate full time prospects (he works in a relatively low paying field.)

My current job is well paid, stable and the people are friendly. The work itself fills me with dread each day, however, and I think this unhappiness spills over into me being frustrated with the normal dysfunctions of organizational life. I am trying to change my role so it requires less dread-inducing work, but still, my heart is not in it.

So how can I survive day to day without either feeling miserable myself or taking out that misery on those around me?

I want to forget about her, but she's famous now

Anonymous — Fri, 17 May 2013 10:43:17 -0800

I wish I could forget about the girl who broke my heart when I was a teenager, but it seems the world doesn't want to let me, because she's famous now, while I'm struggling. How do I deal? Apologies in advance for the novella-length question, but with any luck there's enough angst within to keep you engaged. Anyhow, here's my tale of woe:

I am a 28-year-old man. Back when I was 12, I met a girl and fell for her hard. It was my first love. We had similar personalities and interests and creative drives. We were close friends for years, and she often confided in me and showed me affection, but she never wanted to be my girlfriend.

In my adolescent naivete, I thought that if I remained her loyal friend, she'd eventually decide she wanted to be with me and not the guys she was dating. But that never happened, and while we had some good times together, I remember our friendship primarily as a source of crushing disappointment and depression over the next 6 years. By the end of high school I was tired of feeling used and miserable, we had a falling out, and we haven't spoken since. Looking back now, I wish I had done a lot of things differently, spent my time on something more productive, and saved us both a bunch of drama and anguish, but I was a kid and didn't know better.

It's been 10 years since then, and I have grown and improved myself immensely. I've been in a great relationship with a wonderful, beautiful woman for the past 4 years, and we're very much in love. I'm very confident and happy with myself these days. But one of my primary aspirations remains, as it was when I was a teenager, to achieve recognition and success as an artist. (I was into acting back then -- I make music now -- but it's the same desire. I need to create and I need an audience.) And while I've managed to find a day job that pays the rent and gives me free time to work on my music; and while I've produced some material which I'm extremely proud of; I haven't built much of a following or a career to speak of, even though I've been trying for years and I feel strongly that my work merits it. And that's very frustrating, but I'm still young and talented, so there's nothing to do but to keep working.

But here's the stinger: The girl I was so heartbroken over back in high school, who I would be happy to never think about again, is well on her way to becoming a celebrity. And every so often, and I fear with increasing frequency, she intrudes into my life in various ways. I see articles and photos of her on web sites that I read; internet strangers discussing her talent and charm; mutual acquaintances assuming I want to chat about her latest doings; people digging out old photos to prove that they knew her (which photos might have me in them too, but who cares because I'm just some guy); etc.

This causes me some anguish. While I've matured and improved so much since high school, and hearing about her doesn't affect me as much as it used to, each time I do it re-opens those old wounds a bit. This is a person whom I associate with a lot of painful memories and negative thoughts about myself. And whenever I hear about her, it's about how successful she is in pretty much the way I am trying to be, but am not. Living well is supposed to be the best revenge, and I've lived very well; but when I hear about her I feel like she's lived even better, and I'll never catch up. And it seems like there's no way I can avoid hearing about her.

So my question, such as it is: What strategies can I use to try and cope with this situation productively? I know I shouldn't compare myself to anyone else; it's been a long time and I should move on; I should let go of my resentment. I wish that I could. I don't like to talk about this with people I know because I feel like it's such an old, tired story already. I doubt she's thought about me in years. I have this idea in my mind that I'll be able to truly let go only once I achieve a level of fame that causes my name to barge in on her world the way hers does on mine, which would somehow amount to vindication. I hate that she can still get to me from a distance without even trying, and there's nothing I can do about it. Sometimes that thought motivates me to work harder; I've written some truly excellent songs inspired by all these feelings. But when those songs don't make me famous overnight, it's like twisting the knife, so that source of motivation can be a double-edged sword.

Sometimes it feels like I'm living inside a script, like the universe is playing a prank on me, and I'm the only one who can see the whole narrative and appreciate it. I try to find the humor in all of it, but it's not easy.

Finally, a note on therapy: I've done it at several points over the years, including quite recently, and have discussed these issues at length. It's been a little bit helpful, but the basic issues remain. I may get back into therapy in the future, but I'm between health insurance situations at the moment, so that's not going to be an immediate solution.

I know there's no simple solution, but I'd appreciate any wisdom you have to offer.

I want in the industry, but how should I take the first step?

Saydur — Thu, 16 May 2013 17:49:45 -0800

I'm trying to get a specific job title, but it is a difficult one to find. What is the best course of action to take here? I have found that I am deeply interested in a specific job title in a specific industry which is a fairly narrow position. There are quite a few open positions for this job title, but they consistently demand experience in that exact job title.

What I speak of is a "Game Monetization Designer" which is based around making video games profitable. The biggest obstacles I have found are that it is particularly difficult to find people with this title that I can speak to in order to become more familiar with the community and make professional connections, the specific nature of the job means that I haven't found any other positions in other fields which would provide more than a little bit of relevant experience, and the demand for experience before obtaining the position.

I would be willing to take a different position if it would be a likely path towards what I want in the long term. I have not found any positions which do not demand experience. I would not be able to take an unpaid internship, but starting off at the low end of a livable wage is quite fine. Statistical analysis and sales research are enjoyable to me in general, but the fast pace of the industry is a very serious attraction, so another position in the gaming industry would be quite fine. I would also be interested in similar work for the casino and gambling industry, given that it is also a relatively fast paced entertainment field.

So really, my question is, what's the best direction to take here? I am having an extraordinarily difficult time making connections, so I'm looking for the next best options. I would have more confidence in most other industries, but this title is so specific and experience demanding that I don't really know where to begin.

I graduated in 2008. How do I keep it from ruining the rest of my life?

Anonymous — Wed, 15 May 2013 07:23:02 -0800

I’m uncertain about what I should do for a living and thoroughly demoralized about the monetary value of my abilities after a three year post-grad waithood. I want to build a career, but I don't know where to start. I am a rut with legs. Come in, sit down, have some snowflakes, and please help me become a productive member of society. I currently work in a call center. It’s a good call center job, with the glaring exception of the wages, which render me unable to live as an independent adult (pink collar jobs are notorious for this), but it’s still a call center. I went to school because I knew that I wasn’t cut out for that type of job (it’s stereotypically associated with my race, class and gender, but not my individual temperament and level of social ineptitude) but now I have it anyway, and while I’m apparently made of more malleable material than I thought I was – I am so afraid of being intractably unemployed again that I did not run screaming after the first 125 call day, or the first time I was brought to tears by a string of epithets – but after a year, I’m still not very good at it, or happy with it. I combine the impersonal touch of an automated system with the imperfections of a human novice. I am lucky the bar for satisfactory performance is so low and the same social deficits that impede me at work make certain that I show up to work on time all the time. It would be best for everyone involved if I found something else to do. But what? I still don’t know how to do anything the market deems valuable. Recruiters call me with patently inferior versions of the job I hold now. I’d like to be a professional woman, but I’m 27 years old and this is the closest I’ve come to a “real job” and the longest anyone has employed me. I feel too old to bounce around at temp agencies/internships/freelancing until I find a calling and I am much too frightened that when the music stops, I'll be left standing right back where I was before because I overestimated my worth to others.

So what do I do? Do I take root here, where they’ll have me, buckle down and sharpen up my customer service skills with the hope that I will eventually become a call center supervisor (reaching a middle class income 7 years from now, assuming the whole thing won’t be in Mumbai by then), do I strike out and retrain in something else despite my fear, or do I just apply to different jobs with the desire for prospective employers to see me as who I want to be or could’ve been instead of who I actually am… a “never was”?

I'm not good with numbers at all, I'm moderately detail oriented, and my personal interests are largely notoriously non-remunerative (clothing, cooking, culture, politics). In fact, the desire to accommodate those interests in my free time keeps me believing that I have to find another job - I work 2nd shift, the choices are between 2nd and 3rd, which means that I can't even volunteer or intern to stay involved, and I'm certainly not in the position to consume. I have some interest in aspects of the healthcare field (give me a good excuse to study teeth and I would, I didn't have an excuse to study brains but I did), but have no interest in working with patients. I would like to make at least 37,000 annually, and I dread the prospect of self-employment for myriad reasons. I would strongly prefer to work for the government over the private sector. I have no problem with being a permanent subordinate and actively dislike the idea of supervising others. My priorities are stability, solitude, and health insurance. I have enjoyed work experiences where I was responsible for keeping secrets - having access to and making decisions based on sensitive information, being able to know more about people in the aggregate and individually without having to speak to them. Ideal jobs for me would've had "clerk" on the end a few decades back, but those are largely extinct. Sooo... what professions are out there that I could be at least okay at, and that would give me the ability to pay rent and student loans for the next 10 years?

I just interviewed for a job and I have no idea if I want it or not.

wannabecounselor — Mon, 13 May 2013 16:13:02 -0800

Assuming I got an offer for this job, how should I make my decision? What would you do? I live in a city that I mostly enjoy which is not very close to family, but close friends are nearby. The job is in my rural hometown area just over two hours away. The major reason I applied is that spouse and I are seriously planning to expand (I might be in my first trimester right now, don't want to jinx anything). Pros are, it's close to family that could help with childcare, in a lower cost-of-living area, with a slightly higher salary. I also love "nature" and it's very nice out there. But these are the only pros. I don't feel strongly about the job itself, it's pretty much what I do now which doesn't get me any closer to my "goal" career (see my mefi history if you want to know more). The info I got from the interview and people I met didn't "wow" me. They even asked a couple of questions that really threw me off guard - 1) At the end they asked me if I would accept the job if it were offered to me, which I answered that I have been seriously considering it but would still need about 24 hours to make a final decision, and 2) If I were a final candidate they would want to speak with my current supervisor, who has no idea I applied for this.

Other negatives include: partner's job situation is 85% able to work remotely but no guarantees right now. Potential need for 2nd car would eat into the better salary. I'm at a good place with my current employer and would feel pretty crappy leaving, but because my hometown is so rural I doubt another opportunity like this would come along any time soon.

Also, considering my potential "condition", I anticipate taking new job would mean a heck of a lot of stress during pregnancy, plus not as much maternity time allowed (though if I was near parents, they could help). If I stay where I am for now, I wouldn't feel as much stress through pregnancy and could have extended maternity leave, but then being faced with full-time day care in our expensive area would get overwhelming fast.

I feel like in terms of our financial future and prioritizing care of a future child, it makes sense to take the job and move. But in terms of all the unknowns and potential stress, I'm not sure if it would all be worth it.

I'm losing sleep over this and any advice is appreciated!!! It just may be that my wishy-washy feelings were sensed in the interview and a job offer is not in the cards at all anyway!!!

Do you have advice for an MPP student ISO research position job?

blandcamp — Mon, 13 May 2013 15:51:44 -0800

I'm starting graduate school in the fall: yay! I need to learn an entirely new set of norms around interviews, resumes, etc: oh no! I have a meeting set up with the head of a research institute where I'd LOVE to work there while I'm studying. What do I say? What's OK to ask for? I will want to work at least a few hours a week to pay for food and things, and to get some relevant experience on my resume. There happens to be a research center near campus that works on precisely what I'm interested in! So I emailed the director of the center and asked to meet with her, and now we have something set up.

But ... I'm not sure what to do at the meeting! What's expected of me -- thoughtful questions about the center or about the issue are, an elevator pitch, something else? Is it reasonable to ask for some work there during or after just one meeting?

I'm coming to this world from years in nonprofits, HR departments, official job postings and the like. Any advice Metafilter has to offer would be fantastic.

Resources on careers in psychology or choosing a career in general?

sunrisecoffee — Sun, 12 May 2013 12:31:19 -0800

I've had a lot of jobs, but no career path. Any ideas for resources that will help me a.: decide if therapy is a career path I want to pursue & b.: learn about other careers that might interest me? 10 years out of college. Passionate about many things. Still stumped when it comes to creating a real career. In college I followed my heart, majoring in fields that truly interested me, but led to few, if any, direct career paths. In the intervening years, I've developed a strong interest in psychology and therapy. I have read dozens of textbooks about psychoanalytic therapy and other aspects of psychology and neuroscience. For fun. This has become my area of (closeted) expertise, but I'm wary to commit to a career in this field. I am an introvert and the idea of working closely with so many people is not entirely appealing. However, I do want to have a career where I can influence other's lives in a positive way.

Psychology is the most interesting field to me, but I'm not sure if it's a field in which I want to work. How do I find out before I commit to a grad degree?

Interdisciplinary career options?

Malad — Fri, 10 May 2013 09:01:57 -0800

What careers or jobs might actively look for and value candidates with degrees in quite disparate fields? One example is patent law, where lawyers with science or technical backgrounds are valued. What other instances are there?

Defaulting on a loan

Anonymous — Fri, 10 May 2013 07:57:01 -0800

I am paying back student loan debt that I no longer can because I'm back in full-time education and am not making nearly enough ££. I went to undergrad in the United States. I took out a loan which my university backed me up for, since I couldn't find a cosigner. It was a new initiative for international students, since international students can't take out loans without cosigners, and there was no way for me to take out a loan in my "home country." I graduated 7 years ago, and have been employed on and off, so I deferred when I wasn't working. The jobs that I have worked have been incredibly poorly paid, but I've still been paying it back. I still have about $18,000 to go, and I'm back in full time education, this time in the UK, and can't afford to pay it. (I had been paying it up til now on my (very small) savings which are now depleted.) I have no deferment time left.

I called my loan company and told them I couldn't pay it since I'm back in full-time education. They told me I have no deferment time left (which... I had already told them at the beginning of the phone call, so that annoyed me) and that I had no other options.

So, I really do have no other options. My question is how much will it affect me if I default on this loan? I plan to pay back my debt once I'm working a decent job with a decent wage. I'm considering the:

a) the fact that my university backed me up, and I don't want this program to be cut for other international students in need because of me not paying it, which is why I've been paying despite my abysmal salaries.

b) I am not American and I have no intention to or interest in going back to the US, but I'm wondering if my credit score can affect me elsewhere?

c) Despite not having any intention of going back to the US, what if I get a job and my company sends me there, will this prevent me from getting a visa or give me other complications?

d) I plan to have a pretty political and public career, will not paying this for a few months (however long it takes me to find a decent paying job) severely affect me? Can this come out and ruin my career?

If it matters, I'm 28.

Thanks, AskMe.

Rebuilding shattered self-confidence after grad school?

zeek321 — Thu, 09 May 2013 14:12:12 -0800

So, now I've got a PhD. But I'm crippled by zero self-confidence as I start applying to industry jobs. Did you rebuild your self-confidence after a PhD? My PhD was five years of "failure," of nothing working right, of having no idea what I was doing, of feeling incredibly stupid, a grueling marathon of slow-burning anxiety and impostor syndrome, culminating in three quick successes (dissertation chapters) and a successful defense. Now I've got a few months before my funding runs out, and I'm trying to turn my mess of a dissertation into a couple publication-quality papers. And it's like those first five years all over again.

I did take a break for a few weeks. And I've only been picking apart my dissertation for a few days. But, I feel like nothing's really changed in that I have zero self-confidence in my capacity to function in the real world, I think because I've delivered so few "complete and done" things in five years. My success' have been little blips in half a decade of "failure."

Anyway, I realize this is just a feeling and not reality, it's barely even a "belief." I satisfied my committee, I'm really smart or something, etc., etc., etc. Probably lots of grad students feel this way, and then they get out into the world and input from reality re-teaches them that they actually are perfectly functional in a much-faster-moving work world of daily, weekly, and monthly deliverables.

But I don't *feel* like I'll be successful in the working world. I compare myself to the published grad students in my lab. I feel like I'll sit down and something that needs to be done in a day or a couple weeks will seem impossible to me, just like my research was "impossible" and took years--which I don't have in the workplace. And it'll be really stressful, and it'll prove I'm as thick and useless as I feel, and I'll get fired and stuff.

I'm in a great relationship, I've got friends, I've got passionate hobbies (that don't involve "deliverables"), and I can talk about this stuff openly. So I don't really think I'm globally depressed. And, I *realize* this is irrational, so I'm not too keen on doing CBT or something. But it is distressing. And it's making it hard to network and submit resumes as systematically as I'd like to be doing. (But I am doing it, in fits and starts.)

And, I've tried doing some little projects. I learned the fundamentals of JavaScript (my PhD was programming-heavy) and put a little interactive demo on the web, all in a few hours. But my relief in being able to learn something quickly and deliver was short-lived.

So, my question is, was your confidence completely, irrationally shattered by your graduate program? How did you rebuild it or how did it get rebuilt?

Rising through the ranks - becoming an outstanding teacher (in the UK)

monster max — Wed, 08 May 2013 02:51:18 -0800

How and how quickly can I progress from being a trainee teacher this September to helping to run a school as part of its leadership team? I'm planning a career change and am in the midst of interviews for on-the-job primary school (US: junior school) teacher training (it's called School Direct, for those in the know). I get paid a low salary for the training year (but at least I *do* get paid!) but then I'm a qualified teacher, hooray!

This will mean a big drop in my earnings compared to my current job (which I've been trying to escape for a looooong time now, so I'm choosing to trade less money for more happiness) but then I'll (hopefully) start moving up the ladder. We can manage for a while but I want to be able to look ahead a little.

So, two questions:

1. How quickly can I realistically expect to progress up the ladder from newbie (Newly Qualified Teacher, NQT) to lead of a subject area and then on to being an assistant head... deputy head... head teacher?

2. What would I have to do to make myself outstanding enough to achieve this? What sets apart the teachers who do this, from teachers who are outstanding classroom teachers but always remain as such?

Thank you for any and all advice!

When the "very best" isn't good enough

Anonymous — Tue, 07 May 2013 17:57:36 -0800

I'm graduating college, but it hasn't gone 100% how it should have. I struggled both academically and mentally (have been getting help for both, but it's a process without any "magic bullet"). I have had a lot of pressure from all sides of the family to go into medicine, but I have to see how it is first (through an internship). How do I confidently defuse their nagging questions and bring them back to reality? My GPA is nowhere where it needs to be for medicine. Honestly, I'll give the internship a chance, but I never particularly wanted to be a doctor. (Not that I would mind being one if I could, but not exactly much of a calling, either.)

On the flip side, I don't really know what I INDEED want to be, and I may have to go through several jobs and/or internships to really know. Just like a "normal person", I guess.

A lot of family members are physicians. Many don't really like their jobs! Yet all are trying to use me as a "sacrificial lamb" of some sort. Yes, it's bizarre.

They're not pressuring their own kids...

It's not as if most people know what they want to be, is it? It's not the 1800s anymore where you have to work the same factory job from the age of 12 to 70!

Resume advice?

dry white toast — Tue, 07 May 2013 08:53:59 -0800

I'm applying for my first management level position. I have the requisite number of years experience in the relevant field. In addition to that though, I have recent experience co-managing a very large and complex family estate (that of my grandparents'). Help me reflect this in my job application. Smattering of snowflakes inside. For the last two years, while working at my full time job, I've been responsible for co-managing the resolution of my late grandparent's multi-million dollar estate. It has been stressful, but ultimately it has garnered me valuable experience managing complex issues at a much bigger scale than I've been used to before. I'd like to reflect this in my resume and/or cover letter for a management position, but I'm not sure how to frame it.

I was thinking I could list it under "Other Experience", as it has occurred concurrently with work in my field. I'm also puzzling over what position I would list. I wasn't exactly a trustee (there was a titular trustee company but they took joint direction from myself and another family member). I could be described as an executor, but that's not something one ordinarily puts on a resume (and I wouldn't if this had been a typical estate, but it very much was not). In essence I was a manager or director, but that's not usually a title associated with estate management, and it wasn't official in any way either (beyond being spelled out in a settlement agreement). The other option would be to touch on it in my cover letter, not my resume, but I want to expand on the tasks and skills I used, otherwise it's not really relevant.

Suggestions appreciated.

Jobless, rudderless and miserable post-graduation.

flibbertigibbet — Mon, 06 May 2013 18:04:07 -0800

I am utterly, terrifyingly directionless after I left grad school early for financial reasons--I'm jobless and clueless. How can I redirect myself and get back on track? I've read a half-dozen career books cover-to-cover (from What Colour is Your Parachute? to Po Bronson's What Should I Do With My Life?).

My special-snowflake details:
1) Liberal arts education.
2) Blood pressure (very low) and back issues that my doctor says precludes me from any job with significant standing (so most retail is out, but I've been desperately applying to the rare retail sit-down jobs).
3) In a city undergoing a bit of a crunch as the main employer (government) just laid people off and isn't hiring.
4) My spoken French simply isn't good enough for entry-level administrative jobs here. (Yes, you need French for admin jobs; less so for retail).
5) I'm in a relationship with a great guy--who makes me smile when I'd otherwise want to cry about how hopeless my life is right now--and it would break my goddamn heart to pack up and leave for a less French-centric environment. Even so, I've been applying in other cities and gotten a grand total of 0 bites.

I don't even know where to start with getting my life back on track--the things I might want to do (write, make things) seem like pie-in-the-sky dreams that I should disabuse myself of, and the things I CAN do, I can't get a job in (retail because of health issues, editing and admin stuff [have experience in both] because the market is saturated right now).

Do you have any advice for me?

What is my college degree really worth?

chaiminda — Sun, 28 Apr 2013 05:25:36 -0800

I saw this comment on a post yesterday, and I'm baffled. The idea that even a recent liberal arts grad averages $36,000 a year seems inconceivable to me. I got curious: is there any job that I'm qualified for that pays anywhere near that much? I'm guessing this applies more to people who majored in something that directly relates to their job, but I really don't know many people who made this kind of money right out of college. My major was completely useless (Classical Studies). I knew by the time I graduated that I wasn't cut out for an academic life, and by now I'm not even qualified to teach basic Latin or Greek.

I graduated in '07 and I have worked mostly at various office jobs since then, with three years in the Peace Corps teaching ESL. The highest paid jobs I can find now are ESL jobs, but the pay is well under $30,000 a year because I can't get that many hours. I also freelance write, which pays great but also doesn't give a lot of hours. I'm planning to get a masters in social work in 2014, and it seems that once I have that I may be able to find a job with decent pay, but I would like to be able to save up before grad school makes me poor again. Are there any jobs I should look into that would pay more than $30,000 a year?

Making A Something-Level Career out of Very, Very Little.

Ashen — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 18:39:38 -0800

I have recently acknowledged that my aimlessness has kept me trapped in retail and unable to find better for myself. My goal from several months ago - to find a double-digit hourly position by the anniversary of my graduation from college - is far from accomplished. I am not giving myself another year to mess up, but I'm having some trouble discerning where I should go. These are the facts:

1) I have a 2.5 GPA from a high-ranking Southern university. I fucked up college, too. LONG story short, mental health is more important than I thought. I was smart enough to get in, but that's pretty much all I can say and prove about my academic abilities.* I underutilized the Career Center and they have been reluctant to help me since graduation.

2) My degree has worked against me. An extended period of living in Survival Mode has decreased my inclination to do morally-rewarding non-profit work, which is precisely what my degree slots me towards. Right now, I just want to make a lot of money. Or at the very least, enough money that rent higher than $350 wouldn't leave me anxious and very, very hungry.

3) Most of my experience is administrative, with the exception of my post-college experience, which is retail. I can't help but wonder if this is going to be a significant detriment to me finding work that doesn't make me feel ashamed and depressed.**

4) I no longer speak a level of Spanish that would be valuable beyond being able to understand my current customers in retail.

This is what I would like to do:

1) Write a book. This is mostly a pipe dream and I've accepted the odds of my novel being published as Mind-Numbingly Slim, but something I'd like to do nonetheless.

2) Work as a writer for a video game company. Like the plot-writers at Bioware. I'm aware of how high the odds are stacked against me because I don't have a programming background nor experience with a publishing company, but if you have any suggestions as to where someone like me could start...please let me know?

3) Make lots of money. I don't particularly care how (with the exception listed below). Companies hiring for clerical positions have continued to avoid me like the plague and I haven't had an interview in months. I need another in.

Where do I start? Do I just totally forget about the novel and working for a video game company? Do I have to accept the fact that I'm stuck, and just quietly work my way up the retail management chain? Everyone has advised me to stay put because having 2 jobs in one year looks terrible, but I CAN'T keep living like this. I removed myself from Facebook and haven't updated my LinkedIn account in part because I haven't done as well as my peers. Also, being paid at such a low level is doing really bad things to my self-confidence and I don't have the money or the insurance to fix that.

Thank you.

*The GPA and the reasons behind it are my key roadblocks to grad school, where I'd likely take up a Masters in English. If I got in. Which is not likely.

** Pro-Domming, is not, for my current body type, an option. I am also terrified of it being a kiss of death on any attempt to leave the field afterwards.

How to stop ruminating on "what could have been"

Seeking Direction — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 12:55:09 -0800

I chose a degree path that ended up being much different than I expected, and regularly beat myself up for not choosing a certain other one four years ago. In all honesty, the "other" choice would have definitely come with its own problems, and may have even been worse. However, I constantly get tempted into thinking "what could have been". How do I accept that both choices probably sucked equally, and that you never know what life is going to throw at you, good or bad? I generally believe "everything happens for a reason", and am trying desperately to focus on future possibilities rather than foggy, idealized past circumstances, but I keep ending up in this loop of "what could have been".

I guess you could call it the contrived, perverse illegitimate sibling of nostalgia.

I should note that I have an anxiety disorder.

Any advice?

How to find a job using Chinese language skills?

catrae — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 15:45:29 -0800

Hey Mefis! I am asking this question on behalf of my brother-in-law who recently got laid off. Does anyone here have advice to give to a guy with a degree in Chinese and minor in business who would like to work in manufacturing/ sourcing for a US company either in the US or China? My brother-in-law lives in Missouri (20 minutes from Kansas City) with my sister their two young children. He did not get a job doing what he had dreamed of after graduating, but ended up living close to much of his and our families and settled on a job that was good enough...but had no relation to his interests or skill set. They bought a house and settled down in a small town. My brother-in-law is an avid outdoorsman, and was able to hunt and spend time in nature. So quality of life was great until he got laid off. There are not many jobs nearby and he has been frantically applying throughout the region and beyond. They are willing to relocate for the right job.

They are in a scary situation, but in many ways they want to take this opportunity to get the kind of job he has always wanted. I asked what his dream job was and he said his "absolute dream job" would be working for an outdoors/hunting company doing sourcing in China. He is interested in manufacturing and wants to put his language skills to good use. I am sure for the right job they would even move to China.

So my questions are- does anyone have advice or experience on how to find such a job? Any tips on how to approach companies with the desire to work in a field without having years of experience under your belt? Anyone have experience working in China in manufacturing/ sourcing or representing US companies in China? And lastly, if he could not get his dream job any ideas on how he can search for any kind of job that could use his skills? I am sure he would relocate anywhere in the US to get employed. I feel so bad that I can't give much advice, and thought maybe someone here would have an idea.

Finished PhD; informally meeting with a prof in a different field?

zeek321 — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 12:29:29 -0800

Just got a PhD, don't have a new position lined up, meeting a prof, no obvious goal for conversation, have questions. I have just finished an engineering PhD, and I'm going to be with my lab for a few more months to submit some papers from my diss. (I have no publications, yet.)

Since forever, I've been interested in "X" and "Y" though I didn't know that's what they were called. While following my interests wherever they led, I came across a prof at a nearby institution who studies these things, and she has agreed to meet with me to chat.

I'm trying to figure out how to get the most out of this interaction. At minimum, I'm hoping I can tell her a little bit about my interests and get recommendations for interesting stuff to read that I didn't already see from reading her publications. At maximum, I would like a mentor who would hire me as a postdoc and help me become competitive for a tenure track position.

As for the minimum, this is a highly productive full professor, and I am an amateur, armchair enthusiast, and I'm concerned about wasting her time.

As for the maximum, it doesn't seem like this is likely to be in the cards. She doesn't seem to have a major grant based on my searching the NSF and NIH databases, though I think she's funded through various private institutions. And, she's not advertising for a postdoc or anything.

But, between those two extremes, I'm wondering if there might be an opportunity for me. She and her collaborators do a lot of combined research and outreach in the community, and it seems like there might be ways they could use extra manpower for analysis, statistics, and writing. But, I have to be thinking about a career track that's somewhat commensurate with my educational investment, at least in end-game. So I don't know if I should even pursue this if there's something available.

My advisor is nudging me towards research scientist positions and industry, but I want to make sure I explore some non-obvious and serendipitous stuff, too.

So, I guess my question is:

Were you a newly-minted PhD, and you didn't know what you wanted to do next? And you were clearly not ready for a tenure track position, if ever, and were sort of blah about a wide range of obvious jobs and careers? But, you were self starter with lots of eclectic interests--and you managed to create a career out of nothing, based on conversations with kind but ultimately indifferent people in positions of power?

How did you do this? What happened?

I'm reading through her recent publications and trying to figure out where she's heading next. And I'm thinking about how to frame my diss work in a way that would be attractive to her goals. And I'm preparing to ask lots of questions about what she and her collaborators are doing. I'll have my diss defense talk ready to go in the slight chance she wants to hear about it.

Anyway, I'm going to treat this like an informational interview while simultaneously portraying myself positively.

Am I missing anything in how I should think about this and how I should prepare? This is definitely going to be a shot in the dark. I'd like to have fun but be respectful and make the most of it.

Job change didn't work - how do I go back to my old career?

Anonymous — Sun, 21 Apr 2013 19:44:39 -0800

I was an office manager between 2002-2008, but went back to school to become a nurse. I'm currently an RN in a large metropolitan area, but would really rather go back to a career in administration / office management. What's the best way to do this? Currently, I'm compressing multiple nursing jobs from the past 4 years into one "section" on my resume and only entering basic information that would cross-apply to administration jobs. I'm also putting the rest of my administrative experience beneath that (in chrono order).

Some questions:
1. Do I just leave my nursing jobs out and have a gap of 3-4 years?
2. Are employers going to toss my resume thinking that I'll command a salary equivalent to a nurse of 4 years?
3. Is there anything I can do to leverage the nursing experience into an administrative / office manager role?
4. Any other advice?

Thank you

How Can I Help My Mom Help Herself?

Anonymous — Fri, 19 Apr 2013 14:38:14 -0800

Hey Mefites, here's my question: My younger sister, mother, and I suffered years of abuse at the hands of an alcoholic stepfather - physical, verbal, etc. When we were younger, my sister and I were absolutely focused on getting the fuck out and did, getting scholarships to great schools, thankfully. My mom, not so much. She is no longer in a relationship with him, but they have been living together for economic reasons - she needs his disability paycheck to pay the bills (all of which are in her name, including the mortgage payment.) Anyway, the last few years have been a bit of a "quiet" period for them, but things are ramping up again. He calls her names, spits in her face, has begun drinking again and recently began doing drugs. He knows she's dependent on him which is why he treats her so badly, but she can't kick him out because she needs his money. I am absolutely distressed about this, and feel horribly guilty that I escaped across the country for school and no longer live in the same state as them so I didn't have to deal with this. But now that I'm in my mid-twenties, working on getting treatment for my own depression and have some breathing room, I really want to help!

Here are the details so far:

- She is 55, has basically no money saved up for retirement.
- Financial situation is a disaster. Multiple bills and student loans, bankruptcy on the record, can't open a checking account on her own. Always in the red - I usually send money for some bills and gas/groceries when I can, but I frankly barely make any money either. House is very underwater, can't sell.
- Is a very hard worker. Has always worked multiple jobs as long as I've been alive, has two degrees, etc. Is a very aggressive salesperson, and often wins awards at work for her sales efforts.
- Has been laid off many times due to bad economy. (This is in Las Vegas, which got its ass kicked in the recession.)
- Has a background in sales, medical coding/billing, administrative roles. Masters degree from an online school in management. After most recent layoff she's been working in telemarketing/collections for 3 years, which makes her miserable.
- She is very depressed. Obviously. No means to pay for therapy/counseling.
- Can't afford internet which is part of the reason why I'm trying to help her apply to jobs from another state

I'm helping with what I know how to - I'm making her a linkedin account, already revamped her resume, searching for jobs, going to help start typing out cover letters. I've begun asking my friends from back home if their parents know of any job leads that she can follow.

I think the main thing is helping her find a stable job with a higher income so that she can live on her own. I really don't want my hardworking, loyal mother to live out her last years being spat on and treated like shit. She's been married and divorced twice - her first husband cheated and left before I could even talk, and this guy, obviously, is a piece of garbage. Eventually I want to guide her into therapy and counseling, but it's difficult at this stage.

I know she needs to do this on her own and work really aggressively to cut him out of her life - my sister and I have been making this argument since I was 10 years old - but I think part of her hesitation is that she's lonely. She has expressed interest in wanting to kick him out before the end of the year (her name is on the house).

MeFites - what can I do to make her life better? What are some stable jobs (60K+) for 55-year-old women with long job histories (I'm thinking government jobs??) How can I help her get some free therapy, or help her with her finances? I'm just figuring this stuff out for myself too so I'm really lost. I'd appreciate any advice or resources you'd have to offer. Sorry this is rambly - things are a bit emotional right now.

Throwaway: helpmymom10@gmail.com

PhD dropout

Anonymous — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 19:13:54 -0800

I'm dropping out of a PhD program in a social science with only a masters degree. I need a real job. I am in a top 15 PhD program in my field. I was an average/mediocre grad student by that standard - I did complete a publishable first project, but had a very hands off advisor and I figured out how to do the work too late to stay on track to finish in a reasonable time with my sanity intact. I didn't fit into the academic culture and have no desire to be a professor anymore. I'm taking the masters and leaving at the end of this summer.

I am trying to figure out what jobs I will be qualified for. My degree does not come with a skill set that is directly applicable in industry, but I have sub-PhD level skill in research and statistical analysis. I am open to pretty much any job where I can use some of those skills. I do not want to go back to academic research unless it's in a very different role. I would entertain almost any other idea at this point. Yes, I am asking my university career center and those few people in my department who still want to help, but at this point my only firm criteria are the following:

1) pays $25K a year or more
2) does not require much additional training; I've had enough of school, but I would take additional classes this summer or get some kind of certification if necessary, but no more grad school for now
3) does not require a special skill set other than research, writing, and statistical analysis. I don't know any programming languages well enough to use them on the job right now, but grad school involved constant technical self-teaching as needed.
4) I don't want to teach my subject at the high school or community college level

I would like to leverage the additional degree for whatever it's worth, but it doesn't seem to have any obvious value since it is not a practical professional degree, and it looks like I'm going to be competing for entry level jobs with a crop of 22 year olds with fresh bachelor's degrees. Is this correct? What can I do? phd.dropout.2013@gmail.com

Downshifting: the sequel part III

indognito — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 15:36:26 -0800

Pursuant to two earlier questions today regarding how to get jobs one is overqualified for, I was wondering about taking degrees and job titles off of my resume. Isn't that unethical? Won't it come up, eventually, that I have this whole other degree? If it matters, I'm a master's-degreed librarian with 10+ years' experience looking for work as a library assistant or in an lower-level university admin capacity. I've sent out many, many resumes and cover letters over the course of the last year, and have been met with radio silence. I've had savvy people review my materials and have networked to the best of my abilities. I usually try to explain my reasons for wanting to step down or out of my current professional-track job as a desire for work that I don't take home with me (phrased a little fancier than that)*. For some jobs, I emphasize the aspect of the job description with which I'm particularly enamored--for example, with any job that has a writing component I stress my desire to move into a writing career.

But could it be that places are not calling me back because I'm in this very specific niche career, with a master's degree? I realize that having a master's degree in library science is not the height of glamour, but could it still be hurting my chances? Should I leave the master's degree off? How does one do that!? It also seems like it would be hard to fudge my very specific job title--"librarian."

*I realize that there are many lower-level office jobs where long hours and taking work home are expected--I'm aiming for university jobs specifically because it's my understanding that the culture's generally a little more laid back there.

Thank you, Metafilter, for any advice you can offer!

Want a entry level office job

akomom — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 12:27:11 -0800

Will employer consider a misfit overqualified job applicant for office jobs? Here is the scenario: a biochemistry pHD with many years of post-phD experience both in academic and industry. But due to family reasons (3 young kids, a busy husband), this person only wants a low-stress 9-5 job. Salary is not an issue. But this person does want to learn new things and work with nice people and take new experience for future career development when kids are grown. Do you have experience like this applying to entry level jobs that only need communication and office work related skills? Hiring managers, do you even consider such application? Appreciate any personal stories like this.