Hello metafilter, A few months back, I had a break-up with a friend. At the time, I believed we were very close, and I turned to her because I was very sick, needed help, and couldn't find it anywhere else. Instead of offering help or sympathy, she instead sent me a "go away till you're better" letter two days later. It's broken my heart, and I can't seem to move past it. [more inside]
How did it take you to fully recover from a significant betrayal by someone(s) you trusted? [more inside]
Can you recommend novels in which one character betraying another is a significant plot point but that betrayal is not an affair? We are so used to thinking of betrayal in that particular setting, but I'd like to read stories about other types of betrayals.
Non-profit: I found a grant and brought in two colleagues in my department to choose what we would propose for the grant, to write it and implement it. One of these colleagues who previous to this I would have described as a friend also has completely taken it over and basically pushed me out of the process. How do I get involved again? Or should I just say hindsight is 20/20 and let go of it all? [more inside]
No sooner had I rewritten my iOS app to rely on the backend service Parse ("hundreds of thousands of developers trust us!" it said on the website) than did Facebook kill it. What should I do? [more inside]
Some years ago a psychologist conned me into taking an IQ test. If that weren't bad enough, my test subscores ended up being, for the most part, horrible—nearly bad enough to put me into a percentile in which the 'intellectually impaired' are a part of. Though deep down inside I'm not convinced I'm the dolt I am on paper, these results have really fucked with my head and have made me spend much time questioning my intelligence. Really, all these results have done for me is lower my confidence and cause me a great deal of depression and anxiety that sometimes gets so out of hand that it leaves me feeling suicidal. And this I very well knew could happen. And I knew that receiving less-than-stellar results was highly possible due at least in part to my anxious nature which makes it hard for me to focus when around others. And I knew this would ruin me; and ruin me it has. Now the question is: can the damage be undone? [more inside]
What are some interesting historical events of relatively swift, coordinated, mass betrayal, such as the Night of the Long Knives, or the Bleiburg Tragedy? Doesn't matter if the betrayers were "good" or "bad".
So this is me. My husband cheated on me (twice), and at this point, I really need a safe place to share my experience and the experiences of others. There seem to be an endless number of online forums for this, but the ones I have explored have all been really religious (not my thing), really hostile (understandable but not my style), or all about reconciliation at all costs. Please help me find the support I need. [more inside]
I'm doing everything they say to heal and move on, to get your life together. I try to be as social as I can with good friends who understand the situation and am focusing as much energy into work and school. I'm afraid of burnout though and how to unravel these emotions when I'm lying awake at night and questioning if I did the right thing? [more inside]
This question is very difficult for me to ask, but it has been on my mind enough that I need to swallow my pride and throw it out to you fine folks. I have not been a teen for over a decade; I am, overall, a well-adjusted adult. I am at the top of my game professionally, I am happily married, and I have some wonderful friends. I also have perspective on "real issues"... I've survived some fairly significant tragedies and dealt with family drama that has rendered my therapist speechless. So why do I let the petty antics of a few former friends (who are also colleagues) ruin my day? [more inside]
I feel like I'm going backwards with the break up over my past relationship which occured over six months ago. I was fine for months afterwards and, in the past couple of weeks, I've been feeling increasingly guilty over my behaviour toward my depressed ex and it hurts to think about memories together and him in general much more than it used to. Is it normal, could it be because our one year anniversary would have been in a few days? Why is it happening, when I feel like I care more about my current bf than I did him? Am I betraying him? What should I do? [more inside]
A group of friends effectively dropped me for the last year and now they are making overtures as if nothing happened. How to react? [more inside]
I think my friend tried to fondle me in my sleep. [more inside]
I had a close friend/coworker recently betray me on a very deep level. I've known him for over 3 years and he did everything he said he wouldn't, just for a girl. I really have no desire to continue the friendship any longer and we have not talked since the betrayal occurred. I want to confront him, mostly to get the anger/pain off my chest, but won't be able to do so in person for another few weeks. Is it best to just wait to do the confrontation in person? Or would it be ok to let out the anger earlier, through a text or email? Or would the best thing be to just turn and walk away, leaving
I want to make a web-page which will track if UK political parties' election manifesto promises once they are in power.
I want to make a web-page which will track if UK political parties' election manifesto promises once they are in power. I don't want to devote my life or income to this and i'm only doing it because i think i ought to=i am lazy. Comments? Suggestions? Need to know? Sarcasm? Thanks^_^ [more inside]
In getting ready to update my CV for a big deal application, I just learned (via the table of contents view on Amazon) that I was dropped as the co-author on a book chapter that I wrote for a professor. What is the best way to put this on my CV, now that I know "in press" is replaced by "so long sucker"? And as a junior person in academia, how do I keep this from happening again? [more inside]
I want to get over feelings of betrayal and build trust again in my marriage. How do I bring it up to my husband? [more inside]
Am I wrong to feel wronged? Soap operaishness inside: [more inside]
How do I make it up to my beloved? [more inside]
How do I deal with seeing and interacting with my ex at this event? And, actually, how do I deal with the breakup in general? [more inside]
Torn by conscience, did I talk too much? [more inside]
A family member told me that his wife has been complaining that she is getting emails from online dating services. He said she told him that she has never signed up for them. [more inside]
My wife doesn't get along with my sister. My sister is graduating. My wife discovers that I am buying her a graduation gift without her knowledge. She is upset I went behind her back. Where do I go from here? [more inside]
I grew up in a difficult home situation involving one of my parents, who recently informed that whenever I reached out to a therapist/counselor about what was going on, they would go to her with what I said and even forward e-mails I sent talking about my situation at home. [more inside]
Please help me avoid a major marriage crisis [more inside]
I told myself I would never post a relationship question, but here goes: My boyfriend had, what amounts to in my mind, an emotional affair that's been going on for the past 6 months. I need help deciding if this is worth salvaging. There are, of course, lots of details inside. [more inside]
My friend attempted to cash some forged checks of mine and was arrested. What now? [more inside]
How can I rebuild my relationship with my SO and my parents when someone seems set to undermine it? [more inside]
I feel betrayed by my friend/roommate. How do I get over this? [more inside]
Can you recommend a self-help book for dealing with friendship breakup/betrayal issues? I have found some books for dealing with marital infidelity, which I am not concerned with.
Looking for a quotation cite. I swear it's Delillo. For a long time I thought it was in White Noise but I have been unable to find it in there in spite of re-reading the novel to find the quotation. Maybe The Names or Ratner's Star. The quotation: "betrayal stalks every secret".
In a tough spot with my parents. Trying to find life direction while living at home with two parents that HATE each other to the core. Advice if you've been in a similar situation, please. [more inside]
Since childhood I've been a rather sensitive and justice-obsessed person, but also pretty interested in / attentive to the well-being and inner lives of other people. But I feel increasingly drained. In my field of work there is a lot of getting-ahead through nepotism/ingratiation rather than ability/ passion/effort, and it bothers me. In my life I have people whom I generally like and have opened up to, but who, at critical junctures, exhibit such self-absorption that I'm left feeling not only outraged but injured. I want to change the intensity and duration of my reaction to these things, as it's a huge waste of time, and sometimes upsets my own self-esteem. Please help me stop thinking about other people without becoming alienated and alienating.
"Don't hire her, she's pregnant. You will need to train someone new in June when the baby is due. Not a wise move"
Please help me analyse this workplace drama. I feel betrayed by my friends and discriminated against for being pregnant. [more inside]
How to write a brief email to a disrespectful parent who stole money to try to get it back? [more inside]
How do you start over, with a new love or without one? Heartfelt, soul-searching soap opera of my life and love inside. [more inside]
How do I face the Other Woman? [more inside]
I'm Jewish. My wife converted many years ago. I found out that my Mother-In-Law secretly baptized my children. [more inside]
2 months before the wedding. Fiance kissed another man while drunk. Told me about it. Now what? [more inside]
How do I get past the trust issues brought about from an abrupt, unexplained end to a close friendship of three and a half years? [more inside]
Betrayal - I've betrayed my girlfriend, yet we are still together, trying to heal, and work through the mess I created. Should we even bother? Is this relationship salvageable? [more inside]
I did something effed up and now I'm paying for it. [more inside]
My wife had a months-long affair and I've given her another chance. Any suggestions for getting rid of these awful feelings? [more inside]
I am starting to hate my cousin and best friend. Please help me forgive her. [more inside]
How do I regain my husband's trust? [more inside]
What can I do about a business partner who ran off with an idea? [more inside]
I messed up. Roommate, girl, me. Things go boom. [more inside]