Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with belief

Clues on Israeli superstition?

zadcat — Tue, 12 May 2009 14:06:45 -0800

Hints on Israeli superstitions? I am currently working for an Israeli guy in his thirties and have quietly been told by a third party that he's quite superstitious. For example, I am never to put my bag or purse on the floor, because so doing suggests one does not value one's possessions. And then today, I picked up one of those multi-color ballpoint pens that was lying around to take a few notes, and happened to start writing in red ink. He gasped, told me one NEVER writes in red ink, took the pen away from me and gave me a different one.

Granted he may have his own hangups, but I can only assume that, like anyone else, he's picked up some of these ideas from his own culture. Are there any other Israeli cultural taboos I should be careful of? (He doesn't seem to be especially religious, dresses very casually and has indicated I can also dress casually, and seems otherwise fairly down-to-earth. I'm not so much interested in taboos connected with Judaism as with the current culture in Israel.)

What's a site similar to StandPoint?

PandemicSoul — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 21:44:23 -0800

Help me find a web2.0-ish site, similar to (the now defunct) StandPoint. I used to be an avid member of StandPoint, which was a website where people would introduce a topic, say "Abortion is wrong," and then other people would respond with their view. It would allow you to either vote up or down and then given an explanation. I know I've seen a few other sites like this in the past year or two, but as is usual, I can't ever find them in my myriad of bookmarks or on Google.

Evidence to support feeling hopeful about finding someone?

Ringo — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 06:00:49 -0800

I need evidence! I want to change two of my core beliefs about myself: (1) I will not find someone I love as much as the last girl and (2) I will not be truly happy until I find someone else. If you are single and do not believe these things about yourself, what evidence would you say backs up those beliefs for you? I used to do cognitive behavioural therapy for depression/anxiety, and eventually was able to work my way out of a funk and became significantly happier for awhile. I’m now slipping into a depressive episode after a breakup (due to diverging life paths and locations that couldn’t be reconciled), and I think that this depression was triggered by the fact that a couple of my core beliefs are causing me fundamental vulnerability to events like this. I need to change these or else I will continue to slip into depression at times of adversity when I should merely be sad. By depressed I mean I am picturing the worst possible outcome (I will never again share mutual love with a female that I am mentally and physically attracted to) and I picture that outcome lasting forever, or lasting for so long that I eventually find it intolerable to continue. In any case, the future right now looks very, very bleak to me and I feel like my thoughts about the future are unhealthy. My justification for these beliefs goes like this:

Belief #1 – I will not find someone I love as much as the last girl

1) I’ve only met four girls I’ve felt this way about – two when I was a teen, one at 25, and one at 29 (this last one)
2) I guess I’m picky, but I know what I like, which means I have fewer relationships but the bonds I form are generally stronger – I don’t fall often but when I do I fall hard
3) I have a very hard time meeting girls I click with (see #1)
4) I felt like this girl was a better match for me than any previous, which makes the task seem all the more daunting

Belief #2 – I will not be truly happy until I find someone else

1) I have been somewhat content when not seeing anyone, even experiencing rare moments of joy, but I’m by far happiest when I’m in a relationship
2) I crave physical affection, and intimacy, and I actually feel like I need to have this at least weekly to be happy, and meaningless sex doesn’t do it for me

Some info about me:

I turned 30 recently, which is likely magnifying these feelings. However, I genuinely think I’m a catch: good-looking, professional job that I find pretty interesting, funny, artistic pursuits I am passionate about, plenty of friends (the last girl was the best match they had lined up for me…I may have exhausted that avenue for meeting people for now). I’m living in a smallish, isolated city in Canada (200,000 people), which is another concern because the dating pool is smaller. It’s a college town with an economy that isn’t the best so most intelligent, bright girls leave here for opportunities elsewhere, which was why the last relationship ended. However, I’m here for at least a couple of years pursuing a unique career opportunity and I think it would be a bad idea to move to a bigger city solely because it has a potentially larger dating pool.

So, any evidence that my beliefs are unfounded? Thanks very much.

Can you help me debunk my Mom's food superstitions?

moof — Fri, 16 May 2008 16:30:24 -0800

Mom's visiting. Along with her decade's old prohibition against eating tomatoes, eggplant, bell peppers, potatoes, etc. I'm kind of sick of this. Any clinical proof that solanine causes osteoarthritis? Even better, any proof that it does not? I am forbidden to even re-use cooking utensils between pots that have touched the forbidden foods.

"You're very clever, young man, very clever. But it's turtles all the way down!"

Jezztek — Mon, 12 May 2008 13:54:18 -0800

Dear Hive-Mind, Want to help me brainstorm up a list of strange (pre-existing) theories? Howdy,

I'm working on a new project and I'm just in the brainstorming phase, but I could use a little extra help. I'm trying to think of as many interesting 'theories' that small(ish) clans of people earnestly believe, but pretty much everyone outside these insular groups don't even consider.

What I'm NOT looking for are theories that are still controversial (even if there is a scientific consensus to contradict them, like people that deny global warming or deny evolution).

Basic religious beliefs aren't going to work for me (So please no 'ha ha, Mormons are dumb'), but if they take it to the next level of strangeness they'll work (for example denying evolution is one thing, but believing the devil literally went around with a shovel planting dinosaur bones to screw with our heads is more along the lines of what I'm looking for).

So basically what I need are theories that have an abundance of evidence to contradict them, but still retain some true believers. Conspiracy theories are fine especially if they have an element of the fantastic, but unusual/fantastic explanations for natural/historical events, or just general cosmological strangeness is even better.

And best of all are theories that aren't seriously considered by pretty much anyone, but your average person on the street may have at least heard of (so super obscure theories are a bit less useful).

Some examples:

UFOs visited ancient Egypt and aliens helped build the pyramids
Flat Earthers
The Devil Planted Dinosaur Bones
The Moon Landing Was Faked
"Turtles all the way down"

Thanks much!

Got faith?

Anonymous — Sat, 25 Aug 2007 20:46:34 -0800

I haven't dated anyone in several years now (I'm 35) because I have absolutely no faith that a relationship will work out - in fact to the contrary, I'm quite convinced that it will cause me nothing but pain. This lack of faith is inherent in other aspects of my life - work, personal time etc: I just don't do things because I visualize either pain or failure with great ease, and find it almost impossible to visualize success. How do I go about building faith in my endeavors? I don't consider myself to be depressed - I have been treated for that in the past and I don't think this it. I function pretty well - I have a good job and people like me - I just don't invest in people or activities (or my work any more) because at an unconscious level I relate these things to unpleasant experiences.

I don't think this is a question of optimism either - seeing the sunny side of everything isn't going to get me dating because all of a sudden I'm telling myself it's going to be great and work out.

I am trying to get my life on track - I gave up drugs & booze a few months ago, and I'm working out regularly, all of which is making me feel much better physically. I guess I'm wishing I could improve my self-belief and belief in others in a similar way.

Is there a doctor in the House?

tellurian — Sat, 04 Aug 2007 06:58:23 -0800

I know that House is a TV construct but I'm wondering, are there doctors that perform this role in real life? For example, if I was to turn up in an emergency ward with some weird and unexplainable condition, do hospitals employ a Gregory House that would take on my case?

I love me some science... her, eh, not so much...

wfrgms — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 17:55:55 -0800

Er... so my new girlfriend doesn't believe in atoms... Atoms. You know those squiggly little points, or waves, or clouds, or whatever that make up all matter? Yeah, she doesn't go for it. She's not even down with the periodic table.

A little background: we've been seeing each other for about two months. Everything is wonderful! It's a stellar relationship, certainly one of the best I've had, and so far we're both happy and excited by our seemingly ideal "fit". But behind all the warm hugs, kisses, and deep eye gazing there is a cold, dark realization settling in: my new girl has no appreciation for the intricate beauty of science.

I'm not a scientist, but my bookcase is crammed with pop-sci books ranging from evolution, astronomy, physics, biology... you name it, I've got it. We're talking Greene, Gould, Hawking, Sagan, E. O. Wilson, Dawkins, and others. I have a deep love and appreciation for science which goes back to my childhood. It's fundamental to my character and the fact that she is seemingly so strangely resistant to the subject bothers me greatly. My feeling is that somewhere, somehow a science teacher failed miserably in her formative years and she has been resistant to it ever since (although this is just a theory...)

Even more perplexing is the fact that she is bright, well educated (er... Art History major), inquisitive, and just an all around smart woman. She's flirting with religion for the first time in her adult life by occasionally attending services at a very liberal church. This doesn't alarm me too much because otherwise she's a classic liberal, democrat, secularist.

I haven't pushed her on the subject because frankly it is so strange to me - I'd have a much easier time dealing with a devoutly religious person. But she has (lamely in my opinion) explained that she, "just doesn't believe in that stuff." Basically I think it comes down to the fact that she is suspicious of anything she can't see with her own eyes (never mind her church going...)

In one exchange I asked if she had ever seen Antarctica. She said "no." So I asked, "But, do you believe in Antarctica?" To which she said, "Yes." And then I explained that there is almost (but not quite) exactly the same amount of evidence for the existence of atoms as there is for the existence for Antarctica. But she wasn't going for it...

Soooo I guess I'm just wondering where to go from here. Should I learn to respect our difference of opinion (no matter how incredibly glaring it is in this instance) or should I work to gently encourage her to explore science?

I'd say this question is about 40% how can I change her mind and 60% how can I cope being close to someone who doesn't go for the most basic and elegant components of classic scientific understanding.

Faith Online

MarshallPoe — Fri, 15 Dec 2006 06:26:22 -0800

Religion-Online-Filter: Help me find good religious websites, blogs and online communities. I’m researching the migration of religion (broadly construed) online, 1980s to the present. I was hoping that Mefites could point me in the right direction. I’m interested in: a) early faith-online initiatives from the 1980s or early 1990s; b) popular, traditional (static, ‘web 1.0’) faith-online sites from the 1990s; c) newer, P2P (‘web 2.0’) faith-online sites (Metafilter for the faithful?). Suggestions, anyone?

Do I choose belief or does belief choose me?

crewshell — Wed, 01 Nov 2006 03:09:51 -0800

Is belief a voluntary action, an involuntary action or some mix of the two? Is belief a voluntary action, an involuntary action or some mix of the two?

After reading this Free Will question I remembered a similar thought that came up a few years back that I never explored.

Can I simply choose to believe something or do I not have any control over this part of my mental psyche?

More specifically: Does one choose to believe in an idea, a statement, an occurrence or is this something that happens without our conscience control?

When someone sees something so astonishing and they utter “I couldn’t believe it, even with my own eyes” could they indeed not believe it, even after experiencing it?

Another angle, if someone told you something was true, but to your standards there is no real proof or disproof of what he tells you, could you still simply choose to believe? And if you did, would you actually, truly, be in belief or would you only be fooling yourself?

Going even deeper & conversely, if you did currently have a belief and someone presents something that conflicts with your belief, would that render it no longer true or could you tell yourself to overlook such obstacle, and again still not just be fooling yourself?

Would the answers to these question apply equally to the belief of things we can see and touch (ie. the ice is cold, the car won’t start) and to things that are only thoughts and ideas? (ie. the belief or disbelief of god, that it will or will not rain, that someone does or does not hate you, etc…)

Lastly, does the idea of subjectivity change the premise of this question as well? That being, if someone believes in something that is subjective, ie. beauty, character; how does this affect everything?

I guess overall this question has to do with reality and our perception of it, but I am trying (in the essence of actually coming to some sort of conclusion and to not wind up in an endless circular argument) to give a few concessions and assume that we all are really here, that I really am typing this and that you really will try to answer ;)