This past year I got involved in a local community of people. I have mixed feelings and am looking for your relevant experiences with close-knit urban tribes.
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posted by htid
on Mar 6, 2013 -
23 answers
How do I let my new partner down easy that I may not be able to do all the breath play and choking she might want?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 6, 2013 -
12 answers
I'm kinky, but only sometimes. He's kinky, all the time, and more so than me. He also displays a focus on certain specific sex acts that I find worrying and is interfering with our sex life - not the things we do, but the things it seems he has to do to come or be happy. How do we deal with this? What do these desires of his mean? And if I'm not into the things he has to do, does it mean he's not into me? (Insecurities abound)
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 20, 2013 -
28 answers
I want to only share my identity with the tax man when I write, and allow people to pay me online. How do I do this?
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 13, 2013 -
8 answers
I am trying to come to terms with the fact that I'm kinky, but I feel like my life is over and I wish I could just cut this out of me and get rid of it.
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 10, 2012 -
53 answers
Are there any genuine fetish / bdsm dating sites in the UK, or are they all weird fronts for dating farms?
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 2, 2012 -
10 answers
My husband just told me he's into crossdressing and wants to introduce D/s into our sex life.
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posted by anonymous
on Sep 26, 2012 -
15 answers
How did leather, latex, and vinyl get to be the most popular and celebrated materials in the kink/BDSM world - as opposed to say velvet, silk, organza, lace, muslin?
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posted by divabat
on Sep 25, 2012 -
24 answers
How can I find a partner for a very specific kind of long-distance relationship? (Mild kink inside.)
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posted by anonymous
on Jul 30, 2012 -
8 answers
I've always been a rather aggressive lover, but it wasn't until I met my most recent girlfriend (who is a submissive) that I fully understood my sexuality. I enjoy BDSM, and I don't intend to stop enjoying that experience simply because my girlfriend broke up with me. (Snowflake details below, possibly NSFW.)
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 13, 2012 -
28 answers
Middle-aged, relatively inexperienced and kinky in the "wrong" way. Should I just give up hope?
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 8, 2012 -
25 answers
What do ladies wear to kink events in NYC? And where can I, a plus-sized woman, shop for such clothes? Brick and mortar preferred.
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posted by KinkySockPuppet
on May 18, 2012 -
2 answers
How have you (or have you not) reconciled your feminism with an unexpected and expanding sense of submission, which is not limited to the merely or nearly sexual?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 28, 2012 -
25 answers
I'm looking for a partner who matches me well on a personality level and who is also naturally dominant in bed.
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 11, 2012 -
18 answers
Even though logically I don't feel like he's "marriage material," I am overwhelmed lately with a desire to be married to him. Which way should I be going on this?
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posted by thrasher
on Dec 15, 2011 -
28 answers
I'm sporting some pretty awesome, consensually-obtained bruises in some choice places this week, which I certainly wasn't planning on showing to my doctor. Now I just realized I'm almost out of birth control and need to go for my annual women's health checkup to get more. Am I going to run into any problems? (NSFW)
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 16, 2011 -
26 answers
My therapist is not kink-aware, but she'd like to be. Can you point me to some good reading materials for her?
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posted by anonymous
on Aug 18, 2011 -
10 answers
Kink-filter: How can I initiate sex while maintaining my submissive role in the bedroom? NSFW D/s details inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Jul 30, 2011 -
16 answers
Recommendations for erotica featuring BDSM aftercare? Help me out, Mefites, please!
posted by anonymous
on Jun 6, 2011 -
4 answers
A friend of mine has had Dom-Fem experience and wants to leave it in the past. He believes it ruined his marriage of many years (she wasn't into it), but also got addicted to internet sex sites and liaisons. He's asked me out....what do I need to know?
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posted by anonymous
on May 18, 2011 -
21 answers
Can you recommend good books on forgiving yourself / accepting yourself for having a kink?
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 15, 2011 -
22 answers
Pain you choose + pain you don't choose. Who is writing (either on the web or in print) about intersections of BDSM and chronic pain/illness?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 14, 2011 -
6 answers
I'd like to get tied up somewhere in or around SF either tomorow or Monday. This needn't be a sexual encounter, but it need be professional and discreet.
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posted by 17564
on Feb 12, 2011 -
4 answers
Can you recommend some sexy, titillating, frank, and intelligent sex-related podcasts? Maybe with a kinky bent, even. Queer-friendly a must.
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posted by Netzapper
on Dec 30, 2010 -
10 answers
I've recently come to the conclusion that I need sexual submission and abandon in order to be happy. But I'm concerned about how to do this in a way that both feels authentic and is emotionally safe.
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posted by 3491again
on Dec 22, 2010 -
21 answers
Please give me your recommendations for well-stocked BDSM-inclined sex shops in NYC. Note: *not* Babeland.
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 22, 2010 -
3 answers
My hubby's kinky. I'm not. Please help us figure out a fair way to compromise in the bedroom.
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posted by anonymous
on Aug 23, 2010 -
46 answers
I'm curious about becoming a lifestyle sub. What do I need to know before I go? (Possibly NSFW)
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posted by anonymous
on Jul 26, 2010 -
8 answers
I am a woman in my mid-20's who has had some kink experience in a previous relationship but now wants to explore it a little on my own. I am moving to SF soon so now is as good a time as any to try. I am both fascinated by and intimidated by it all, and would like to know some general information, advice, and suggestions on directions I could try to check things out slowly and discretely.
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posted by anonymous
on Jul 20, 2010 -
12 answers
I am looking for advice about or stories of coming to terms with submissive feelings in bed. I'm a lady in my mid 20s and I like dudes.
I've seen a few questions like
this one and
this one, from the perspective of guys who want to be more dominant with their girls, but are finding it hard to get in the head-space. I'm interested in the opposite angle.
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posted by anonymous
on May 21, 2010 -
35 answers
Can you recommend some good writings about the psychological aspects of a D/s relationship, the process of getting to know one another and submission.
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posted by anonymous
on Apr 11, 2010 -
7 answers
BDSMFilter: How can I find non-monogamous kinky lovers out here in the vanilla world? I've gone to munches and classes at TES (a bdsm organization here in NYC) and other bdsm groups, but I never meet people there with whom I can connect on other levels. Is there a trick to finding kinky folk in vanilla settings?
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 1, 2010 -
16 answers
BDSM Bingo: Anyone familiar with Hipster Bingo able to help with a very different kind of Bingo card?
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posted by anonymous
on Feb 17, 2010 -
9 answers
My hang-ups are stopping me enjoying kinky times with my wife. I want to find a way to get over them because they're driving me crazy. (Very NSFW details inside.)
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 22, 2010 -
19 answers
