Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with batshitinsane

Help me not be a psychogirl.

Anonymous — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 20:23:04 -0800

I'm exhibiting behaviors typically attributed to the architypal "psychogirl." And I hate it. Another complicated relationshipfilter (I know, I know). Ok. I dated a guy last year, who was (and is) seemingly everything I want in a guy: independent, funny, handsome, ambitious, financially independent, creative & scientifically minded.

Problem: he just could not cut his severely close emotional ties to his ex, and would habitually come to the her rescue— even for little things she was capable of doing herself. This obviously started grating on me. (Caveat: I am ALL FOR being friends with exes, but the ties that keep you thisclose need to be severed for real friendship to occur.)

So at that point, we were about 5 months in, and he dropped a casual, "I think I might love you," right dead smack in the middle of a conversation and let it go. Never talked about it again. And I didn't have the chance to respond.

So about a month later, this bombshell was starting put me on edge and felt I needed to respond. I was starting to get nervous about the "where is this going/why won't he just let the ex go" type stuff. I was thinking about him obsessively (for me, anyway), and started distrusting him. I decided to grow a set and just tell him I loved him. Which I did. It did not go well.

He needed more time, so I gave him that. Meanwhile, I had started birth control, which evidently TURNS ME INTO A LUNATIC. The symptoms of lunacy came on gradually and imperceptibly, and pretty soon I was acting as close to pregnant as I have ever gotten. Obsessive, weepy, naggy, needy, frustrated, etc. And neither of us could figure out why I was acting like that. (DUH.)

BUT! Let's recap. I, at that point, was dealing with:
1.) an omnipresent ex
2.) potentially (??) unrequited feelings
3.) the birth control from hell

I couldn't stand it anymore- I was losing it. So we broke it off, I cried for multiple months, went to therapy, got healed, went off the birth control. Those were awful, awful months for me. A "turning point in life" type of awful.

Eventually, a year later, everything became clear, as it often does with hindsight. I did not like the situations we were in, but I can't help feeling that I would have dealt with them exponentially better without the birth control. (NO SHIT.) And I also believe the situations have changed, as in the ex is no longer so much in the picture.

Cue to about a week ago: I ran into him (after about a year) and we got to talking. Which led to dinner, which led to drinks, which led to him confessing that he misses me, joking about being brought back together, and telling me he never stopped thinking about me. I essentially responded with, "Whatever, buddy," but didn't exactly throw a drink in his face either.

So now it's on my mind. Great. He called to tell me that he'd had a great time that night, then went incommunicado. And I'm kind of getting back into the mild psycho-y habit of "where the hell is he? Why hasn't he called? What is he doing? I see he's online..." And I hate it. Severely. It's just not me.

So, my elevator speech questions are these:
1.) If he pursues, should I respond? Does he get another chance? (If so, No. 2 still needs to be fixed.)
2.) How in god's name do I just stop being a psychogirl, whatever the answer to no. 1 is? I want to not think about him, live my very busy life, and just take it a day at a time.

#Help, Mefi!

If you have follow-up questions, email at: recycle.not.throw.away@gmail.com

What can the judge do to Orly Taitz?

Flunkie — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 10:26:10 -0800

What can the judge do to Orly Taitz? In response to her unlawyerly behavior in a lawsuit that she filed on behalf of an Army captain, alleging that Barack Obama is not actually the president, and therefore the captain has no obligation to follow her deployment orders, a judge recently ordered lawyer/dentist/real estate agent/Birther extraordinaire Orly Taitz to explain why he should not fine her ten thousand dollars.

The deadline that the judge gave for Taitz to file the explanation was last Friday. Instead of such an explanation, Taitz filed a motion for an extension of the deadline, along with a motion for the judge to recuse himself, based on some truly wacky allegations, such as the judge allegedly owning Microsoft stock, and Microsoft allegedly being aligned with the "de facto president", or an alleged sighting of Attorney General Holder in a coffee shop near the judge's office, allegedly proving that the judge is in the "de facto" president's pocket.

My question is: What can the judge do about this sort of thing?

Obviously he can fine her $10,000. Can he fine her more? Can he throw her in jail? For how long? Can he bring criminal charges? What kind? Or civil charges? Can he have her disbarred? Or recommend that she be disbarred?

What defense does she have against whatever the judge can do, other than to stop yapping?

If it matters, assume that her behavior just keeps continuing indefinitely.

Is 'br****s' obscene?

knapah — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 09:03:16 -0800

I think the UK television gameshow Countdown just beep-edited out the word 'breasts' from their broadcast. Is this mandated by law or some broadcasting code? Is there some UK 'obscenity' law that prohibits the word breasts before the watershed? This was on Channel 4(+1), so I assume it was the same in the non-timeshifted broadcast, but don't know.

Oh, and if you search youtube for countdown videos you'll find amusing examples of swear words coming up as answers, but 'breasts'?!

The Regretful Adventurer?

The otter lady — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 14:10:50 -0800

Any stories, published or personal, about those who've taken the road less traveled... and regretted it? So I'm looking to undergo a large life change; I'm planning to sell or give away everything I own, and go off in search of adventure and self-discovery.

While I'm looking forward to it, and I can find any number of books or stories where people who have done something like this have described it as the best experience of their lives, I can't help but think there must be quite a lot of people who've "dropped out" and then been desperate to drop back in again. Realizing that they'd rather be in a cubicle than in the Peace Corps, finding that going to Tibet to become a monk was really NOT what they wanted, etc.

Are there any books or stories like this, or does anyone have any personal anecdotes to give me?

(I've read "Into the Wild", but McCandless apparently didn't actually -regret- what he'd done until he was pretty clearly dying)

My friend has a persistent stalker who is not getting the message.

Optimus Chyme — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 12:11:30 -0800

My friend has a persistent stalker who is not getting the message. Help us get rid of him. My friend has an ex who will not stop calling, emailing, or texting her. On May 22, she told him not to contact her ever again, and that he would get no reponse to any attempted contact.

Since then, he has called 13 times, leaving at least 7 voice messages. He has emailed her 40 times. He has tried to relay messages to her through other friends. She has read The Gift of Fear. She has not responded in any way to his calls, texts, or emails. She even is using her phone company's "parental controls" to block all texts or calls coming from his phone. He is not getting the message, apparently.

How long can we expect this to go on? Another two months? A year? I don't think that this guy is dangerous - he's a huge loser, but he has never been violent. She just wants to be able to open her email and check her voicemail without having to deal with this pathetic little shell of a man.

I will answer any questions you might have in the thread or via email.

Also, my hairy legs mean that I have "failed at being a woman."

liketitanic — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 21:19:48 -0800

How do you deal with a crazy person's total hostility? My brother is in the psych ward again, which is good, and he's getting good care, which is good.

But he's acting like a caged animal and says a lot of nasty abusive shit to me. I KNOW that he doesn't really know what he's saying and that it's not his fault. But I'm having trouble not taking his bait and not being hurt by it. Like when he says that I must really love this (being here with him) because it's easier than holding down a job. Or that I lie to him. Or that I don't keep promises to him.

How do I react to him, and how do I react in my mind? It hurts.

I suspect he is not actually the child of novelist Robert Parker.

liketitanic — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 06:49:29 -0800

Has my brother completely lost his mind? And if so, what do I do now? Before 9 PM today I was prepared to ask about biodiesel cars. My brother, in his mid-twenties, appears to be having a psychotic break in a distant city, and I'm not sure how to proceed. He called me yesterday and rambled for 3 hours about all manner of things in a completely crazy way--including the fact that he had located our long-missing older brother, but that Brother #2 was using a fake name, perhaps because the Feds are watching and there was a private investigator outside his house yesterday and he might actually be the son of novelist Robert Parker and perhaps he and I don't have the same father and is Brother #2 the same child our mother miscarried 27 years ago and when he tried to buy a computer at Best Buy the other day they switched them on him and and and. It went on like this for three hours. When I spoke he did not actually respond to the things I said, but continued in this vein.

My suspicion is that it is schizophrenia. He's the right age for it. It might also be a very long bender, because he also says that he has been using heroin until recently. Next week is also the anniversary of our mother's death. He says he is mad at his friends because they are telling him he's "crazy." The friends I managed to track down tell me this started about a week and a half ago--but that at the time he was mostly ranting about money and the stock market, not this insane baroque family shit. He also says he is getting on a plane to go to New York on Monday to see a girlfriend who told him it was probably not a good idea. I could not convince him otherwise.

What the fuck do I do, Metafilter? He keeps saying, unprovoked, that he's not going to hurt himself, so I think that EVEN IF the New Orleans police took me seriously they would ultimately not intervene. Who can I call? Will they even let him on a plane? Should I try to go to New Orleans? To New York? How can I help him? I'm worried sick.

open source Mars Lander

Floydd — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 18:39:25 -0800

Why isn't there an open source Mars Lander? The Phoenix Lander cost a Bunch'O'Money. How cheaply could it be done without NASA involved?

getting the big O out of the little O

randomination — Sat, 08 Nov 2008 05:17:49 -0800

1. What is Barack Obama doing in my copy of Opera 9.62?
2. How do I get him out? I'm running Ubuntu 8.04, modified for Eee PC (a build done by this guy).

Since November 4, my preferred web browser, Opera 9.62, has on launch started playing an audio loop of Obama's 'Yes We Can' speech, set to music, that's impossible to turn off. This was slightly charming at first but it's actually now doing my nut in.

I've searched reasonably hard to see if this is happening to anyone else, but with no luck. please reassure me that it's not happening in my own head and tell me how to remove it.

Asking, "ou est le banc" won't cut it here.

Anonymous — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 18:32:24 -0800

How can I teach myself to read and translate French at the intermediate level in the next six weeks? I have to take a translation exam. In six weeks. In French. The amount of French I know is best categorized as "un tres petit peu." Using Sandberg's "French for Reading," can I teach myself enough to fulfill the exam? Its requirements are translating 2 200-word passages of intermediate prose (New York Times or New Yorker level) in two hours with the help of a dictionary. Any dictionary I want. Can I do this, given that I'm a fast learner? I can't delay the exam. I'd appreciate: strategies, tips, dictionary suggestions.

Anon because this is pretty embarrassing. For me, anyway.

Where oh where has my wifi gone?

bjork24 — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 10:20:20 -0800

What the WiFi?! My wireless network has gone insane, and it's about to give me a nervous breakdown. Please, please, PLEASE help. My wireless network has gone berserk over the last six months. Prior to this current rash of craziness, it worked flawlessly for two and a half years, now it's doing this:

1. Internet drops in and out in a cyclical pattern. I have access for five minutes, then nothing for two or three, then it's up again for five, down again for two. Up and down, on and off, over and over and over. Over the course of the day, however, the downtime tends to win out.

2. I have no cordless phones, microwaves, or any other device (that I know of) that might be interfering with the signal.

3. When the internet is down, I'm still able to access all the other computers on the wireless network. The network is comprised of five computers - four that connect to the router wirelessly, and one that's wired.

4. When the internet is down, I'm usually able to still use IM (adium), and 50% of the time Google sites still come up.

5. I've gone through three routers over the last six months. Two WRT54Gs, and one Dynex. The problems persist regardless of the firmware (I've tried Tomato, DD-WRT, and the proprietary versions for each router). The linksys routers were version 2 and 7.

The wired computer always seems to have internet access, which leads me to believe it's something in the wireless transmission, but what?! I've tweaked all sorts of settings in the router -- turned security off and on, increased and decreased MTU, bumped up transmit power, etc. -- but none of it seems to make a difference.

Does anyone have any clue why my wireless has gone batshitinsane?

Child Support & Crazy People

disillusioned — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 15:51:21 -0800

Child Support Filter: He's supposed to be paying $207 a month, she has custody, he hasn't paid for almost two years, and served her with papers saying SHE owes HIM child support money. My friend has a 4 year old, lives in Arizona, never married the father. They have a relatively strained past, she has custody but he has visitation on every other weekend. (It *might* be split custody, with her as the primary, though.) She isn't currently working (lives with her parents, has some income from wedding photography gigs, and is getting a job) and the courts ordered him to pay $207/mo. a few years back. He hasn't paid since November of 2006 now, but she's not in absolute DIRE need, since her parents help support.

He called last week with the realization that interest accrues, and kinda freaked out, wanting to "take care of this but I don't have any money." She explained that she wasn't pressuring him or going to turn him in, but that the interest and support were his responsibility, of course.

Now, he's served her with papers stating that she owes him child support moving forward. He lives in Wyoming and is a full-time student there with no job, so he isn't even taking his visitation presently. (His mom sees the child every other weekend, because my friend wants her to have that relationship and is nice about it.) He just got out of rehab for drug abuse and has been clean for about a month. He has no income, however, either. (Though his mom was helping pay child support up through when he stopped.)

I know this probably isn't enough information to go off of, and that you are not my lawyer, but I'm just wondering exactly how far out of left field is his attempt to try to get HER to pay child support. The child lives with her, and she supports her entirely. He filled out the form from the state's superior court site in a bizarre manner, but if there is an existing court order for him to pay $207/mo., what, if any mechanism is there for HER to be paying him when she's the custodial parent and he in no way supports or sees her?

None, right? (Again, just looking for a barometer on the crazy here.)

"Can I come in and have a look around?"

greytape — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 06:32:13 -0800

How feasible is nuclear disarmament? I'm a big fan of nuclear disarmament.
I don't support unilateral disarmament, but I think a major focus of all governments should be dismantling the world's nuclear arsenals and rigorously inspecting and enforcing a ban. At the moment, this idea doesn’t seem to be taken seriously anywhere outside of Norway.
However, I've read various things which have suggested that such an inspection system would be completely unworkable. Not politically, but practically. So even if, let us imagine, the inspectors had powers to look anywhere, rifle through government files, march into Area 51 and the Kremlin, there's still no way that they'd be able to find all the missiles buried out in the mountains somewhere, ready to launch at the flick of a switch. Is this true? I suspect it would be difficult to create new nuclear weapons without inspectors noticing, even with the smokescreen of a civilian nuclear programme, but surely hiding already existent weapons would be fairly easy? Have there been any feasibility studies on this? At the time of the Iraq war it was assumed that inspectors were fairly ineffectual, but hindsight has perhaps suggested otherwise.
I appreciate that the main barriers to nuclear disarmament are political, but let us suppose that the majority of the world’s governments came to their senses for long enough, would it be remotely practical?

Help Me Break the Cymbalta Cycle

misha — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 17:21:08 -0800

Hellacious Cymbalta withdrawal (I'm two weeks in). The side effects are beginning to overwhelm me. What can I do to make this withdrawal process easier? A little background: I was on 60mg Cymbalta for about a year and a half, prescribed by my therapist. When it was determined that my sluggish thyroid played a huge part in my depression and my Synthroid dosage was upped significantly recently, my therapist and I decided I could taper off the Cymbalta (I am still on Wellbutrin). He gave me a week's worth of 30 mg, so I went from the 60 to the week's worth of 30, to nothing. I have been completely off of all Cymbalta now for two weeks and have experienced: nausea, digestive problems, insomnia, mood swings at the drop of the hat (crying jags, increased irritability, even rage for the slightest offenses), confusion, brain zaps, lack of concentration to the point of not being able to remember simple words or conversations that just took place (just writing this question was laborious), hot flashes and sweating followed by chills and sneezing fits, and now headaches that go right down into my teeth and jaw and just. won't. stop.

So, Mefites, any advice to help minimize the effects of withdrawal? Keep in mind that I have asked my therapist and he is at a loss other than, "Well, we could put you back on the Cymbalta and taper you off slowly over a period of weeks," which I am just not willing to do; these last two weeks have been so difficult (I've never had this kind of withdrawal from any other drug, and have taken Prozac and Serzone in the past) that I don't want to have anything to do with Cymbalta ever again. I have also on a few occasions resorted to an over-the-counter sleep aid for the insomnia but don't want to become dependent on it.

I know YANMD, etc. Please do not direct me to the Elli Lily website, insist that the side effects are minor or that it is all in my head, etc. All constructive advice is appreciated!

Is Pizza a Sandwich?

nonreflectiveobject — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 20:19:15 -0800

Is pizza a sandwich? I've been having a long debate with a close friend, and we're both somewhat obstinate, so the debate has gotten nowhere. My friend claims that pizza is in fact an unusual formulation of an open-faced sandwich; I disagree. Discuss.

The future of military robotics?

East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 — Tue, 27 May 2008 08:42:16 -0800

Why is the only .arpa website about unicycles?

TIME FOR MORE STORIES

yeoja — Mon, 19 May 2008 09:49:10 -0800

Last night, I spent an hour reading the crazy, hilarious stories posted here. One hour was not enough. I need more davesecretaryatwork - or at least, more like him. Rarely do I laugh so hard at things I read, let alone things I read online. A chuckle or giggle, yes, but not the kind of laughter brought on by random stories of kyle, camping trips gone wrong, floating hoo-has and tawny cougars.

The stories ended far too soon, and according to the comments, davesecretary has moved to China with no new stories to be found. Sadly, my Google searches also found nothing new.

Where can I find more awesome, hilarious writers, bloggers or other material online like davesecretary? Not necessarily ones with the exact same writing style (though that would be great), but any that make you really, REALLY laugh out loud. I realize humor is subjective, but I'd love to hear any suggestions. The only writers I can think of are Dave Barry or Douglas Adams, but to me their styles are merely humorous than outright BUAHAHAHA awesome.

:)

Albany: Florida Of The North!

Sticherbeast — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 10:16:15 -0800

Defining Upstate New York as "anything within the state further north than Westchester," what documented bizarre historical events - large or small - have transpired in Upstate New York since the late 19th century or so? This is for a strange little artistic project I'm working on set in Upstate New York - we'd like to weave real life strangeness into our fictional universe. Those of you who have lived around Schenectady or so know that Upstate can attract some dismally weird happenings. For example, there's the case in 1973 of mysterious twirling documents mentioning "normalized extinction" and "incomplete Davis-Greenstein orientation" falling from the sky into a hayfield in North Greenbush, or the time a few years ago in Schenectady when a house exploded with cockroaches (I read about this in the New York Times in about 2004 or so, but I can't remember when exactly).

I do not think i am wrong. Am I?

Anonymous — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 10:36:04 -0800

Insane-seeming relationship jealousy. Who is the crazy one here? Multiple questions. I know, relationship filter. Against my better judgment i started seeing a guy who is the reason why my long term relationship ended, more or less. Because we were better friends than anything else, i am lucky (i think) that my ex and the surrounding circle of our mutual friends still like me and want to be friendly. So civil, normal, kind, mature. The new guy flips out on me every weekend with some new thing about never being able to trust me and how he would like me to stop seeing my ex and everyone he is associated with (ie all my friends). No more than twice i week ill go to shows, dinner etc with ex & friends. Obviously this is totally off base right? Ive isolated myself somewhat after my breakup and obviously my friends would tell me that he is acting crazy and i feel like hes acting irrational but he seems to try to want to convince me that i need to see it from his perspective and that if the tables were reversed i would feel the same way. I highly doubt this. What is he doing to me? If he really likes me as much as he is saying why would he want me to give up everyone ive come to love in the past years? He also exhibits jealousy towards guys at parties, male friends, co-workers, and even gay guys. Is this dating? i havent done it in years. Are these the mythical "red-flags" of dating Is there something mentally wrong with him? Ive only known him 2 months and he wants to abolish my history & livelyhood.

OH GOD MY EYES

InnocentBystander — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 19:44:51 -0800

Why do blue Christmas lights hurt the hell out of my eyes? Recently there has been an upswing in the number of people with these bright blue Christmas lights strung all over their yards. Normally I love Christmas lights -- they're so festive! -- but these blue ones make me physically repulsed somehow. They hurt my eyes and give me a headache like someone has put a knife into my skull. It's a similar (but toned-down) version of what happens if I look at a blacklight/ultraviolet light, which give me ridiculously bad pain, even to the point of making me throw up.

What gives? These blue lights suck so much that I am freaked out to even drive right now: when I see them, I instinctively turn my head, and I keep worrying that one of these times I'll do it and run into a car/deer/whathaveyou.

Is there a reason for this phenomenon? Is anyone else experiencing this? Am I just insane?

Are my memories real? Does it matter if they aren't?

Avenger — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 01:59:03 -0800

How can I be sure that my childhood actually happened? Before I begin, let me say:

1) No, this is not a joke

and

2) No, despite my wishes to the contrary, I'm not stoned out of my mind.

Basically, I have a number of memories from my childhood that are completely surreal and more or less physically impossible -- which would rationally suggest that I'm remembering dreams -- yet these "memories" are just as real and perfectly vivid as any other memory of my childhood. I'm disturbed by the implications of this.

Example 1: I have a vivid, utterly real "memory", from when I was 6 or 7 I guess, of my dad and I standing together, naked, in a toilet bowl. We weren't shrunk or anything, just sort of standing there, full sized. I know, it's classic Freudian dream material. Yet, it's just as "real" to me as one of my birthday parties from those years.

Example 2: I remember, very distinctly and strongly, of visiting my grandmother's house for a family reunion when I was about 9 or 10. Part of the "ritual" of the family reunion involved everyone (except myself, because I chickened out) walking over a bed of hot, smoldering coals.

Yes, I know it's all completely insane. I asked my grandma about it last year and she agreed that it's insane as well, yet I remember it as well as I remember Christmas from around that time. Perfect clarity.

Example 3: Some kids have "imaginary friends". I had an "imaginary enemy". It was the telephone pole who lived out back. The nodes on top were his eyes, the "V" shape crossbars was his perpetually grinning mouth. The strange part is that I remember him speaking. Like, really remember him speaking. He spoke a terrible monster-language (sounded like "Gonk-gonk-gonk") but I could understand what he was saying. He always wanted to eat me and my family. I remember him threatening my family, as much as I remember my dad talking to me as a child. Its that real to me.

The rational part of my mind (which I like to think is very strong) realizes that these and other "memories" are obviously products of my own mind -- yet I'm unable to distinguish them in any way from "reality", except, perhaps, by their seemingly ludicrous nature.

So, some questions:

Is this normal? Does anyone else have these experiences? Or am I completely insane?

Is there any truth to the idea of "false memories" that could have been implanted by someone else? Or even by myself, unknowingly?

And finally, (on a more philosophical note) If I can't reliably tell the difference between dreams and reality from such a young age, how can I be sure that anything from back then is real? Obviously I can ask others who were supposedly there (like grandma) but if they don't remember, what does it say about my personal integrity that many of my earliest, most formative memories could be fake? Or even mostly fake? Obviously I've given some extreme and very surreal examples, but what can I trust if I can't trust my own memory?

getattr(CSharp, "Pythonic") += 1

electronslave — Tue, 24 Jul 2007 00:47:42 -0800

Hilarious, but earnest: how can I make C# more like Python? I hate C# very much, but it's a work requirement. I'm used to Python and C (and various intermediate/assembly languages) as a baseline.

Over the years, I've done contracts which required me to use C#, Java and C++, but I despise object orientation as it stands in "Enterprise-class" languages.

Python, on the other hand, provides me with instant reflection, lots of options for dynamic attribute access, freedom from casting (viz. duck typing) and Pyrex, one of the best glue languages outside of C itself (C++/CLI makes me weep with frustration.)

If I'm going to use this language for work — and it's the language that matters — how can I add my own semantic sugar and make it all Pythonic with goodness and happy?

Primarily important to me are: calling SQL stored procedures as if they were methods (think SQLAlchemy,) Python-style reflection, generators (I know I need to implement IEnumerator – but how?) and IL generation (if all else fails.)

BABY? YEA or NAY?

snsranch — Tue, 22 May 2007 20:37:18 -0800

I'm on the fence about having a BABY! Please see more inside. We might be a bit old for child rearing/raising. We're both 38. I'm the step-pop of two fantastic boys who are 8 and 9. We are a very happy family, but the Mom and I are very much in Love and want to have a kid together.

I know it's silly to post this but I really respect and appreciate all of the facts, opinions and related tales that are shared here on AskMe.

Should we just go for it?

Concerns: I'm a gulf war vet-possible bad sperm, we're kinda old, cost of day care, will the boys react well, do I have to give up my martini habit?

Seriously, any anecdotes, ideas or opinions are appreciated.

Fired by voicemail

Mijo Bijo — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 18:23:11 -0800

I got fired via voicemail. Am I allowed to publish this voicemail to the web? Some background:

I started working as a waiter at a restaurant about 9 months ago. When I was hired, a friend of mine mentioned that somebody that I was acquainted with used to be a manager there. I was acquainted with this person because he was a regular at an establishment that I had previously worked at. Four months into working there, my boss fired the two bartenders because they started a side business that he felt conflicted with his own. I was promoted to head bartender.

My boss is very vindictive, occassionally making comments to me to the affect, "When you see the old bartender thank him for your job," and other comments. I remained friends with the old bartender and consider him to be a good friend of mine, so I was very put off by the comments. I never mentioned the former bartender because whenever the subject came up it put my boss in a foul mood and my work environment suffered because of it.

Wednesday of last week as him and I were closing the restaurant down for the night we were having a very informal chat. My boss was going on vacation to Argentina (where he's from) and was going over the things that I would have to do to pick up the slack during his absence (liquor/wine ordering, etc.) followed by us both talking about our personal lives. I made a comment that I heard that bad things have happened before he has left in the past. He looked at me puzzled and I explained to him that I heard he fired the former manager right before he left last time he went to Argentina. He asked me how I knew him, I told him he was a regular at my last job. He told me I was lying to him and f#*&ing with him. He told me I only know him because I met him through the former bartender (wholly untrue, never saw the two together in my life). I told him I wasn't, why would I do that? Calmed him down as best I could, but I had to go. Went out after work, had my cell phone charging at home so it wasn't on my person. When I came home I had a voicemail from the owner.

It turns out that the former manager is the chef for the former bartender's side business. I didn't know this, if I did I would never have mentioned his name to my boss. I'm friends with the old bartender, but I am not privy to much information about his business, nor do I inquire.

I have to file a labor board claim against him for:

1. Failure to pay overtime.
2. Working off the clock.
3. Wrongfully scheduling breaks (Come into work, forced to take a lunch break 1/2 hour later, then working for 8 hours straight.)
4. Not giving me my final check.
5. When finally getting my final check it was shorted ~12 hours.
6. Possibly wrongful termination.

I've tried to talk to my former employer but all attempts have failed, the last communication was the voicemail, except for the next day when I came in to get my final check he had an "important table, and I should understand". I waited over an hour and finally gave up on getting paid or talking to him.

I want to publish this voicemail on the web, the friends that I've played it for have all been astounded. He chuckles and refers to me being fired as "good news". I've saved it as an mp3 and edited a person's last name and the name of the establishment out of it (I don't want to give him business, any publicity is good publicity as they say). Can I legally do this? Even if I can legally do this, could this hamper my case with the labor board (I do not plan to sue him in a court, just use the administrative process). I'm in California if that makes a difference.

Is the solution for us all to become Peruvians?

grouse — Tue, 13 Mar 2007 07:49:32 -0800

I am looking for a quotation similar to "Ron Paul, who believes the solution is for us all to become Peruvians..." I thought this was in a Molly Ivins column, but the closest I can find is this column, published 13 October 1996 in the Austin American-Statesman:

In the amazing 14th, Democrat Lefty Morris (his slogan is 'Lefty is Right!') faces the Republican/Libertarian Ron Paul, who is himself so far right that he's sometimes left, as happens with your Libertarians. I think my favorite issue here is Paul's 1993 newsletter advising 'Frightened Americans' on how to get their money out of the country. He advised that Peruvian citizenship could be purchased for a mere 25 grand. That we should all become Peruvians is one of the more innovative suggestions of this festive campaign season. But what will the Peruvians think of it?

Have searched for ["ron paul" peruvian solution] on Google, Yahoo, and Lexis-Nexis Academic Universe. Apparently the newsletter was called the Ron Paul Survival Report, but I am looking for a quotation about Ron Paul, not from him. Any other ideas?