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Graduate Housing for the Complicated

I had a poor experience in dorm life previously. Now that I'm going to graduate school I'm facing a difficult decision, about whether to live on or off campus. [more inside]
posted by Aranquis on Apr 14, 2014 - 22 answers


Giving up on other people

If you have failed at forming relationships (of any kind), is there a point where you should just accept you don't have the skills and are incapable of developing them? [more inside]
posted by Aranquis on Apr 6, 2014 - 40 answers

Pros and Cons of retention for a 4th grader with special needs

I'm looking for research or studies that examine the pros and cons of having a child with special needs (especially Autism Spectrum Disorder) repeat a grade versus social promotion. I'd also like to hear from teachers or educators who've held kids back and any students (especially those that were receiving special education services) that were held back in the 3rd, 4th or 5th grade and how it impacted you. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 26, 2014 - 9 answers

The only disability in life is a bad attitude.

Should I disclose my son's ASD and ADHD to other parents when he goes on playdates where we are not present? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 18, 2014 - 27 answers

I Don't Understand The Point Of This Autism Video by Carly Fleischmann

Let me make this very specific: I'm an autism specialist. I have blog about autism as part of my job. I post useful information to the Montana Autism Education Project blog. But I'm having trouble understanding the usefulness of this video as a teaching tool. The video begins by saying, "Autism has locked me in a body that I can't control." Great opening, but the video ends by saying, "Everyone has an inner voice. I found a way to let mine out." But the video does not show Carly letting her voice out. She gets frustrated and stands up in slow motion. It's a good perspective video, kind of, but it doesn't show how she changes her response to get coffee. There are better videos that I can use for trainings that show what interactions/coffee shopsa are like for someone with autism spectrum disorder. Am I missing something in this video that shows a person with autism using her voice/communication? Disclaimer stuff: I know who Carly is.
posted by ITravelMontana on Mar 15, 2014 - 5 answers

Socially acceptable stims (other than doodling) -- are there any?

Having discovered that a nontrivial fraction of people find my preferred stim distracting and rude, I'm on the lookout for other tactile stims/stim toys that are more socially acceptable. Doodling doesn't do it for me, for whatever reason. In situations where stimming is most helpful to me, I usually don't have a table to hide my hand motions under, so subtlety would be nice, as would silence. I'm especially interested in hearing from people who are affronted by knitting in social and work situations. Suggestions? [more inside]
posted by dorque on Feb 28, 2014 - 72 answers

When do I reveal my agnosticism to my eight-year old?

My eight-year old was talking about god the other day, and she said something that my first impulse was to correct, but instead I ignored it. She said, "like you, I believe in god." Problem is, I kinda don't. But I'm pretty much the only one in the family with doubts, and I'm not sure when it makes sense to reveal it, specifically to this child. The reason I have doubts about talking to her specifically about it is because she's on the spectrum, and I think that makes it harder for her, especially so young, to sustain her own beliefs. I envy people of faith, but I do not share their faith. Have you dealt with this issue? How do you handle it when you're kid's a believer, but you're not. Special snowflake details inside [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 17, 2014 - 37 answers

I need help with my son's iep

At the parent-teacher conference Dec 5th the teacher told me my autistic/ADHD/OCD/GAD child is so aggressive the staff fears their safety and want to use restrainsts, and they want to bring it up in the next iep. This is the first I've heard of any aggression. [more inside]
posted by FunkyHelix on Dec 26, 2013 - 14 answers

Mazatlan, Mexico - Who Can Connect Me With People Interested in Autism?

I'll be in Mazatlan for five days in January. If there is a local group interested in autism, I would like to offer to speak to them. I searched the web for autism "groups" but couldn't find anything for a local autism group/parent group like I could find in the United States. Do you know an autism group or a contact with the education department that you can suggest to me? Thanks. Disclaimer stuff: My fee for talking would be no money, just a suggestion for a good restaurant. I'm not trying to build my ego, just offering a chance to talk to people about autism. I do that regularly in my day job and it doesn't matter where I go, when I say that I'm an autism specialist everyone has questions. If I can offer some answers, that's good. I make my living as a specialist in autism and have for 25 years. I don't speak Spanish but am used to working with interpreters.
posted by ITravelMontana on Dec 5, 2013 - 1 answer

Career advice/resources for autistic adults: go!

Recently I have had to come to terms with the fact that 1) I am somewhere on the autistic spectrum and 2) I am working in a field that is not ever going to be very accommodating for me. Advice and pointers needed; secret spices, more info and toy inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 4, 2013 - 14 answers

Looking for resources on autism

My 5 year old nephew was recently officially diagnosed with autism, as a two on the three-level scale. I know next to nothing about autism and am seeking resources that will help me become more educated about the disorder. I would love recommendations on books, blogs, magazine articles, documentaries, etc. [more inside]
posted by imalaowai on Oct 17, 2013 - 21 answers

How can I best interact with this guy?

I have a teammate at work and I need to know how to make our working relationship more effective. He has trouble with social interaction and exhibits behaviors that I've often heard in discussions about Asperger/autism spectrum disorders, but more to the point, he has trouble with anger and I'm not sure how to respond to it. I understand that I can't be sure about my armchair diagnosis, but I don't need to know the cause of his behavior so long as I can find ways to work with him. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 30, 2013 - 16 answers

Am I on the spectrum? Does it matter if I am?

I recently spent a while babysitting for a pre-teen girl with Asperger's. I found her behavior to be eerily reminiscent of myself at that age, with the key difference being that I have never had an Asperger's diagnosis. I *do* have a diagnosis of chronic anxiety and ADHD. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 27, 2013 - 8 answers

Taking my teenage autistic brother out for dinner, what should we do?

My well-meaning boyfriend offered to take my 18-year-old autistic brother with very low social skills out for dinner to celebrate his graduation. We're not sure what to talk about with him. [more inside]
posted by JoannaC on Aug 26, 2013 - 37 answers

Do you know the origin or history of the term splinter skills?

I had never heard this phrase before and came across it in an article about autism. Curious about it, I searched online, but was unable to find much. [more inside]
posted by abirdinthehand on Jul 15, 2013 - 5 answers

Could Dental Anesthesia Possibly Kill My Daughter?

My 9-year-old autistic daughter has 5 cavities, three in adult teeth. The dentist wants to put her under general anesthesia. While this would certainly be way more convenient for the dentist, and less hellish for her, I'm concerned about the dangers of anesthesia. I've read about hospital patients suffocating in anesthesia screwups. Is that a possible outcome in dental anesthesia, or is that a different procedure? Do I have a reasonable concern? Should we try to do it normally? Snowflake details: on the spectrum, she's definitely a bit more sensitive and rigid than neurotypical kids, but not drastically so. On a side note: how important is it to fill cavities in baby teeth she will probably lose in a year or two?
posted by musofire on Apr 15, 2013 - 21 answers

What's a good job for someone with ABA and admin experience?

My girlfriend got her B.A. in Psychology, then worked for 2 years doing ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis) therapy with autistic children. After that, she worked for 6 years in the family business: her parents are doctors, and she served as the admin, doing scheduling, billing, hiring/firing, account management/finances, building management, etc. Now, she is looking for a new job (one of the parents is retiring next month), but we are having trouble coming up with her next career step. Any ideas, MetaFilter? More details inside. [more inside]
posted by rjacobs on Mar 12, 2013 - 6 answers

How do I care less about what my girlfriend is thinking?

I'm a year and a half into my first serious relationship and it has a lot going for it. But, almost every time we now go see a movie together, or check out a concert, or go somewhere new for dinner, I spend more time worrying about rather she's having a good time than actually enjoying it myself. It's worse if it's something I picked out or suggested, and I find myself avoiding suggesting something I think I'll enjoy because I get nervous about her reaction. She has really relaxed standards for entertainment and usually enjoys what I suggest, so I know it's me and not her. Anyone have experience with dealing with this in their relationships? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 10, 2013 - 16 answers

Best simple way to affix light dots to a black t-shirt?

My son's school has a "100th day of school" t-shirt project coming up, requiring 100 of something to be on the shirt. He's a kindergartener with fine-motor issues who suggests a Pac-Man theme. I'd like him to decorate the shirt himself or at least part of it. So, how should he get 100 colored dots in various pastel colors on a black or navy t-shirt? Ideally the dot-making wouldn't require a lot of grip strength or precision. (We adults will help with the Pac-Man, ghosts, and maze lines as needed.) Bonus points for washability, but that's not essential.
posted by homelystar on Jan 15, 2013 - 20 answers

Old friends, babysitting, child with special needs?

Old friends, babysitting, child with special needs? [more inside]
posted by skbw on Jan 4, 2013 - 13 answers

I am not a special snowflake!

Can you suggest some kick-ass female career/life role models for this social-sciences loving, radical left-leaning, and possibly autistic, woman? I need to read about other people who have been successful in the areas I've struggled in. Not Temple Grandin, please. Many snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 11, 2012 - 16 answers

Please eat, son!

Thoughts on how to get my three year old to eat. [more inside]
posted by zizzle on Sep 11, 2012 - 27 answers

Is it better to be officially autistic rather than openly strange?

Is it useful for me, as someone in my late forties, to seek a diagnosis as a high-ish functioning autistic (which, after some research, I'm fairly sure I am) in order to have a clear identity rather than being "that creepy old man". Which isn't terribly good for my self-esteem among other things. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 22, 2012 - 14 answers

What's a good Lego-related gift for a 5 year-old?

What Lego-related gift should I get in the USA for a bright 5 year old Australian with Asperger spectrum issues? He likes Lego and has a particular interest in Legoland in San Diego. I want something that costs no more than $20 and I'd rather leave presents of actual Lego to his parents.
posted by Joe in Australia on Jul 8, 2012 - 9 answers

Ex with Asperger's

How do I navigate trying to reconnect with an ex who possibly has Autism/Aspergers? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 3, 2012 - 8 answers

How do I interact with an adult who may have Asperger's in a way that makes them feel comfortable?

How do I interact with an adult brother of my girlfriend I am meeting for the first time... who may have Asperger's/autism spectrum...... in a way that makes them feel comfortable? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 29, 2012 - 18 answers

Causes of Psychological Disorders

I am working in a Autism lab this summer. I've been wondering whether it is a problem that so many psychological disorders are defined by symptoms and focused on treating symptoms. I think, and this isn't a particularly controversial opinion, that it is also important to investigate their causes. Are there any instances of really effective investigations of the cause/causes of psychological disorders (discussion open to any disorder)?
posted by Lee Shore on Jun 4, 2012 - 19 answers

What happens if an open-source app intentionally violates a software patent?

Is it illegal to willfully recreate a patented software process in open-source software, and what would be the possible consequences? [more inside]
posted by Calibandage on Jun 3, 2012 - 10 answers

My daughter is being diagnosed for autism and I need help dealing with this.

I've recently discovered that my daughter is, at least in some form, autistic. I'm having a little trouble coping with this revelation and I'm feeling a bit lost about how to go forward. [more inside]
posted by WinnipegDragon on Apr 23, 2012 - 32 answers

Introducing Our Quirky Kindergartener

What (and how much) should we include in a booklet for a "mainstream" kindergarten teacher about a kid with autism? [more inside]
posted by homelystar on Feb 13, 2012 - 10 answers

Where can I go to mentally calibrate myself in PDX?

PDX Filter: Had a small meltdown last Friday and came home from work. Today I'm feeling completely detached from my job and I just want to get some help once and for all. What kind of mental health facilities can I call up today about getting in this afternoon? More snowflake-y stuff inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 7, 2011 - 8 answers

Why do I clap my hands without knowing it?

Sometimes when I'm concentrating, I unconsciously and involuntarily clap / clench my muscles / make nonverbal noises. I've done this ever since I was a child. What am I doing? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 21, 2011 - 14 answers

Advice on adult autism, mediation and housemates

A question about adult autism anger management issues in a housemate context. [more inside]
posted by lover on Aug 14, 2011 - 30 answers

Autism therapy providers in Philadelphia

Looking for recommendations for autism therapy service providers for a 3 year old, in West Philadelphia. Thank you! [more inside]
posted by life moves pretty fast on Aug 2, 2011 - 1 answer

Growing with Autism

So my autistic son is now 9 years old. How do I (a 5'0" woman) stop him (a 4'6" tornado) from physically harming me? [more inside]
posted by mitzyjalapeno on Jul 14, 2011 - 14 answers

Is it acceptable to ask for mugshots?

A question on social etiquette; "Hey, (insert name here), can I have a photo of your face? [more inside]
posted by malusmoriendumest on Jul 10, 2011 - 24 answers

Help my husband be more in tune with other people.

Are there good sources for a scientist to improve emotional intelligence - in particular, to be able to read others' emotions and ape appropriate emotions as needed socially? [more inside]
posted by juliewhite on Jun 23, 2011 - 16 answers

Any advice for filing with Washington's DDD?

Have you successfully applied with the Division of Developmental Disabilities in Washington State? If so, any tips? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 11, 2011 - 2 answers

Lifespan of autistic people?

Do autistic people have shorter life expectancies ? [more inside]
posted by JJkiss on Jun 6, 2011 - 10 answers

Advice about Guardianship

Can you recommend resources regarding Guardianship proceedings for an autistic child turning 18 at the end of the year? (You are not my lawyer, I'm not looking for legal advice, I am seeing a lawyer next week; here I am just looking for advice / experiences from other families who have been through this process.) [more inside]
posted by Lokheed on Apr 26, 2011 - 5 answers

To Diagnose Autism, or Not to Diagnose Autism...

Is it necessary to have my 3-year old son diagnosed for Autism Spectrum Disorder by a neuropsychologist if we're already certain he has high-functioning autism? [more inside]
posted by Detuned Radio on Apr 11, 2011 - 26 answers

LPCC Candidate Seeking Employment Websites

I'm job hunting and looking for recommendations for non-profit listings other than Craigslist. If it matters, I'm located in California. [more inside]
posted by luciddream928 on Mar 24, 2011 - 9 answers

Should I be the trustee for my autistic cousin's trust fund?

I need help deciding whether to agree to be the trustee for my cousin's trust fund. He has autism and will likely outlive his parents, so I've been asked because I'm only 10 years older and have a reputation for being responsible. I apologize if my questions below come off as callous - I'm trying to get a sense of what this would objectively mean for my own life, independent of my beliefs about family obligations. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 5, 2011 - 21 answers

What is this autism book?

Looking for a book I read about a decade or a little more ago about a boy with autism. There was a dog that helped him communicate with the world, and it might have been from either his perspective or his mothers'. Any ideas what it is would be appreciated.
posted by daysocks on Feb 9, 2011 - 10 answers

heartless heartbreaker

Why do I keep stringing people along/breaking their hearts? Or...why do I not seem to be able to love deeply? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 23, 2011 - 33 answers

IEP advice needed for the Mother of an Autistic Daughter

Please help my someone-I-know-as-a-name-on-the-net-kind-of-friend set up her autistic 3rd grade daughter's Individual Education Program (IEP). [more inside]
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey on Nov 21, 2010 - 11 answers

i don't know what to say

A week ago, my sister and her husband (they have a four year old) have decided to undergo a trial separation. Please help me figure out how best to support her, and whether or not I should keep my mouth shut. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 9, 2010 - 17 answers

Help me make good decisions about my 10 year old son

I need help to decide what to do next with my 10 year old son. He's the sweetest most charming kid you've ever met, but he has language processing and attention issues (much more inside), and I feel like we're at a pivotal point. But I don't know what the next step should be or even what my options are. [more inside]
posted by BaxterG4 on Oct 30, 2010 - 20 answers

Looking for a squeeze machine

I've been reading about Temple Grandin's "squeeze machine," and I would really like to use it. (More info about what it is here.) Are there any places in the NYC area where I could?
posted by sdn on Sep 17, 2010 - 10 answers

Who do we contact at the Oregon DHS to report an abusive work situation?

Who do we contact at the Oregon DHS to report an abusive work situation? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 19, 2010 - 4 answers

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