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Aging in literature and film

As I approach my fifties and confront the reality that parts of my body are wearing out and will never be young and resilient again, I turn to the arts for deeper philosophical understanding of this aspect of the human condition that I am facing. I'd like recommendations of fictional treatments of physical aging which are realistic but compassionate. Guidelines and caveats behind the fold. [more inside]
posted by matildaben on Aug 13, 2014 - 25 answers

Help my aging parents slow down

Any advice on how to convince my active, aging parents to slow down a bit and find that right balance between being active and overactive? [more inside]
posted by kalimotxero on Aug 5, 2014 - 24 answers

What home-made items benefit from aging?

If all goes well, I'll be away from home for up to 20 months, beginning this winter. What home-made foods, etc., could I make before leaving that would be super-awesome after aging for a year or two? [more inside]
posted by Mngo on Aug 4, 2014 - 17 answers

I Want You to Want Me

Is this some sort of mid-life crisis, a hormone thing, or both? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 1, 2014 - 12 answers

What are foods that taste better the longer you take to make them?

Chocolate chip cookies. No-knead bread. Even crepes! All of these benefit from rest time (and usually 12+ hours). Are there other foods that also taste better the longer you take to make them? [more inside]
posted by subversiveasset on Jul 29, 2014 - 42 answers

Looking for elder care LA/BOS/NYC?

My 87 year old mom is currently at the Psych ward in Fall River, RI. Her mental health has been deteriorating recently and we are looking into places that she might be comfortable at if and when she is no longer able to be at home in Wellfleet, Cape Cod with 24 hour care. [more inside]
posted by silsurf on Jul 21, 2014 - 6 answers

The Aging, Arthritic Dog: What's next?

Our 16 year old shepherd-husky mix, Gertrude (obligatory pic 1, 2) has bad arthritic hips and has trouble lying down, getting up and does not like to go down the short flight of stairs to go outside. She's on Rimadyl and Proin. We do have pain medication (Tramadol), which she does not like at all/will not take without a fight. She's in good spirits and is still eating (which is very good as she can be a finicky eater) and is at a good weight. She has a vet appointment this weekend to discuss if there's a next step to make Gert more comfortable. We are prepared if this is the end of the road (should she let us know so), but we're not quite there yet. Aged Dog Owners of Mefi: Prepare me for the vet - is there a step between where we are and the end, aside from asking for a more palatable pain medication?
posted by sarajane on May 15, 2014 - 19 answers

I don't learn/recall as well in my thirties. Strategies?

What are some strategies to keep the mind in its best condition to learn, retain, and recall as we age? Its much harder and psychologically daunting for me to keep "fresh" than it was just a few years ago. How do I halt the decline or improve the situation? [more inside]
posted by meantime on Mar 26, 2014 - 11 answers

Aging Parent Filter: how do your folks get food and transportation?

People with aging parents (not newly retired, but also not ready for home care/retirement home): how are your parents getting food and transportation? [more inside]
posted by cranberryskies on Feb 28, 2014 - 21 answers

A hypothetical question about fall risk and Parkinsons

Does activity level during the day elevate the risk of a fall later in the day for a Parkinsons patient? [more inside]
posted by vincele on Feb 26, 2014 - 7 answers

"young lady"

Is there any explanation for how the phrase "young lady," used in addressing an obviously older woman, became popular? I never hear it used in addressing girls anymore, but only as a lame attempt to be friendly to an older woman. It's as if the speaker is trying to make you feel better about the fact that you are not a young lady; it is so much nicer to hear the respectful yet affectionate Southern colloquialism "miss lady." Ditto for the phrase "graduate college': when and why did even respected news sources drop the "from" ("graduate from college")? Thanks for listening.
posted by mmiddle on Feb 25, 2014 - 30 answers

Alcohol makes me depressed, when it didn't before. Aging, or Wellbutrin?

As I age, I've noticed a trend: The older I get, the less it takes for me to feel depressed after a night of drinking. Like, not just hungover, but in a generally terrible mood. In my college days, I would naturally feel hungover after drinking a bit too much at a party, whereas having a glass or two of wine wouldn't make me break a sweat. These days, if go overboard I am basically dead to the world for the next two, even three days; but what surprises me is that even having 1-3 drinks with friends turns me into a mess the next day. It seems that no matter how little I drink I wake up groggy, in low spirits, and don't really feel like doing anything - God forbid I have to work the next day. I am usually a pretty happy person, and it was never this bad even a decade ago. These days, if I get invited to have a drink with friends, I often times turn them down since I know that even one drink could might a mood swing that could last days. [more inside]
posted by BuddyBoo on Feb 1, 2014 - 21 answers

Not getting older, getting better

What, in your experience, is the bright side of getting older? [more inside]
posted by rpfields on Jan 1, 2014 - 63 answers

How long is too long for muscles to heal?

So I'm older now and I know that injuries take long to heal. I'm just trying to get a handle on my new normal. I pulled the muscles in my upper arm two months ago and it's still sore. Is this normal for age 40ish? [more inside]
posted by Jalliah on Dec 29, 2013 - 7 answers

Tell me about your experience buying an iPad for an elderly person

My mom, who recently sold her home and moved into senior housing, has expressed interest in owning some sort of computing device. She's basically computer illiterate, has never been on the internet, and has trouble using my TV remote control sometimes. Am I crazy to even consider getting her an iPad? [more inside]
posted by bondcliff on Dec 2, 2013 - 35 answers

Is it ever a good idea to have kids late in life?

I would like to hear from either parents who had children much later than they planned, and also from people whose parents were older than "normal". What were the main obstacles? What do you wish you had known in advance if you were the parent? What would you have advised your parent if you were the child? And what were the positives on each side? Complications to follow. [more inside]
posted by outoftime on Nov 21, 2013 - 29 answers

How do childless people deal with the challenges of aging?

My partner and I have been thinking about aging recently, as various relatives reach the phase of their lives where they're moving into nursing homes and retirement facilities. Our examples are mostly of people with children, but as most of our friends reach middle age without children, we were wondering: in the US, where we don't have ingrained cultural obligations or socialist structure, how do people go through older age without kids to take care of them? If you're in that group, what are your plans for your old age? [more inside]
posted by linettasky on Oct 7, 2013 - 30 answers

And here I thought cancer was bad.

In this Time magazine interview, Google founder Larry Page talks about the new Calico project. One particular quote jumped out at me: "Are people really focused on the right things? One of the things I thought was amazing is that if you solve cancer, you'd add about three years to people's average life expectancy," Page said. "We think of solving cancer as this huge thing that'll totally change the world [...] but in the aggregate, it's not as big an advance as you might think." Err, really? Can this be true? Or is this one of those statistical tricks - like the one with life expectancy in the middle ages, where we think people died in their mid-thirties, but in reality, once you adjust for infant mortality, people actually typically lived well into their sixties? I tried asking Mr. Google but his answers were confusing.
posted by rada on Sep 23, 2013 - 12 answers

Best product for darkening very short male hair?

I've been cutting my hair very short, and discovered that while I didn't mind my graying hair when it was a normal length, it is much grayer-looking when cut this close and does not look good in combination with my untanned white scalp. Can someone point out good hair color products for white guys with extremely short hair? [more inside]
posted by Another Sock Puppet on Aug 6, 2013 - 7 answers

I Once Was As You Are Now Maybe

Looking for films and literature based on a theme of an older person discovering that many people younger than they are, are old themselves. Meta-theme: the meaning of aging.
posted by Xurando on Jul 15, 2013 - 6 answers

Um, yeah, you are deteriorating.

How can I best support the dear elderly people in my life who can't do what they used to do? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by sockerpup on Jun 10, 2013 - 12 answers

How to keep a difficult phone call from imploding?

Need to update an out of the loop narcissistic sibling about our Mother's declining health. Wish do do this without fueling her issues and having it turn into a blame game. Snow storm details ahead! [more inside]
posted by cat_link on May 17, 2013 - 25 answers

I want Readability stylesheet on each web page 1st load. Possible?

I'm finding as I age, I use Readability on a lot of pages. Can I make a local style sheet that overrides the native one upon first load of a page that does what Readability does?
posted by usermac on May 14, 2013 - 5 answers

Song about stages of life?

Halp! I can't think of the song by a guy talking about different ages in his life; he names several ages like 15, 24, etc., throughout the song and for each one talks about how he feels at that time. It's has a slowish melancholy feel to it. Thanks Mefites!
posted by michellenoel on Apr 28, 2013 - 12 answers

Advice for adult children of mentally-not-all-there parents?

How do balance respecting a parent's age and experience and treating them well when they aren't acting their age? Sorry for the length. I am not sure how to make it shorter. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 2, 2013 - 19 answers

How do I get health insurance for my Eastern European mother-in-law?

My wife's mom is a widow of advancing age. She lives alone in Eastern Europe, in a country with universal health care. (More or less... thanks, austerity!) As she is getting older, we're starting to worry about her living over there, both because of quality of care and because the day that she's no longer suited to live by herself seems approaching. We live in the US and would like to bring her over here permanently. Putting aside immigration questions, how do we get health insurance for her? [more inside]
posted by DirtyOldTown on Mar 12, 2013 - 8 answers

How can I get my aging father to stop eating like a picky child?

My dad is around 70 years old and has subsisted on a steady diet of shortbread cookies (those ones in the yellow box from the convenience store) and vanilla Ensure drinks for the past 2-3 years. How can we help him to help himself and eat real, nourishing food? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 8, 2013 - 33 answers

80 year old MIL talks incessantly

My 80 year old mother- in- law of 30 years talks non-stop about things I am not interested in----- but the people-pleaser in me keeps listening to her politely and I end up feeling exhausted. [more inside]
posted by seekingsimplicity on Mar 5, 2013 - 23 answers

Pain in the...

I recently lost a significant amount of weight, and am smaller than I've been in about 20 years. As a result, of what I assume is a combination of weight loss and aging, I have little padding on my butt. As a result, my sacrum and tail bone hurt whenever I sit on anything somewhat hard for any length of time - like - 10 minutes! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 1, 2013 - 22 answers

Does moisturizer even work?

I was wondering if there is any scientific basis to the idea that using moisturizer improves the texture of skin to the point that it prevents aging. My thoughts are that if moisturizer did what it claimed to do, no one would ever need an acid peel or botox. Does spreading emollient on your face actually really do anything apart from line the pockets of cosmetics companies?
posted by abbagoochie on Feb 25, 2013 - 23 answers

Why do people get divorced after many, many years together?

It seems to me that if you've been fairly happy for many (10 - 25) years, this trend would continue. For many people that doesn't seem to be the case. I am interested in hearing theories or experiences regarding that. How can something that worked for so long cease to work so suddenly?
posted by Feel the beat of the rhythm of the night on Feb 19, 2013 - 71 answers

How can I support Mom through Dad's failing mental health?

My Dad is in his late 60's and through some combination of age, TIA's, and overmedication, he is at some times out of it and inappropriate, and at all times tired and lethargic. My Mom is struggling horribly with this as she's unwilling to see herself entirely as a caretaker, and she enables him with regards to alcohol and drugs, and beats up on herself over things she can't control. I'd like to support her and give her good guidance without being overly harsh. [more inside]
posted by ftm on Jan 31, 2013 - 10 answers

The Gift of (Irrational) Fear

How do you quell irrational fears? And how do you know whether it's irrational or trying to tell you something more? [more inside]
posted by ichomp on Jan 27, 2013 - 13 answers

Riddle me this.

Good puzzle book (or series of books) for bright senior mom with mild confusion/dementia? [more inside]
posted by Currer Belfry on Jan 21, 2013 - 3 answers

It-All-Goes-Downhill-After-30-Filter

Is there anything I can do to minimize, hide, or slow down the lines developing under my eyes? [more inside]
posted by raztaj on Jan 10, 2013 - 17 answers

But I'm a Girl!

At age 45 I'm noticing changes in the hair all over my body: less on my head; more on my chin; darker, thicker moustache; more on my feet. Bonus difficulty: I am a woman. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 13, 2012 - 14 answers

Is my wrinkle cream aging me?

I'm in my early 20s and my skin is getting worse by the day. Can wrinkle creams make wrinkles worse? [more inside]
posted by vanitas on Dec 5, 2012 - 28 answers

Dry Skin Solutions

My skin is really dry due to aging. What can I do? [more inside]
posted by valeries on Nov 14, 2012 - 19 answers

How do I bank sperm for later use?

How do I bank my sperm for potential future parenting desires? [more inside]
posted by Borborygmus on Oct 19, 2012 - 4 answers

Sadfilter: Helping an elderly parent/grandparent realize they can never go home.

Strategies for helping an elderly parent, who is living in assisted living, realize/come to terms with the fact that moving home will never be an option and it is now time to sell that home? [more inside]
posted by lovableiago on Oct 11, 2012 - 21 answers

Boot cut girl in a skinny jeans world

The era of skinny women's jeans has been here for a while, but I've still got a closet full of my perfectly good boot-cut and flared jeans. Can I wear these judiciously (even among young people) without looking embarrassingly out-of-touch? If not, should I try to alter them, or is there a chance they'll come back into style in a year or two anyway? [more inside]
posted by Bardolph on Oct 3, 2012 - 51 answers

Maintaining Inner and Outer Beauty : How Have You Women (&Men!) Done It Over The Years?

Attention all gracefully aging/aged people: what practical beauty/fashion/makeup/skincare/LIFE tips can you offer me, a 20 year old woman, who also wants to age beautifully (Inside and Out?) [more inside]
posted by rhythm_queen on Sep 30, 2012 - 47 answers

By the time I'm 40, I will be see-through!

Is-This-Normal filter : I am a few short months away from turning 30, and have noticed while looking in the mirror and at body parts I can see without one, that over my whole body my veins/arteries are a lot more visible than they were before. Is this a normal part of aging? Can it be stopped, or mitigated somehow? Deets inside. [more inside]
posted by Fig on Sep 20, 2012 - 7 answers

Not getting any younger

Lately when I look at myself in the mirror I look old for my age (36). But I don’t want to look old for my age. I want to look amazing for my age! What are some daily regimens I can follow to preserve what’s left of my fading beauty (hah) for as long as possible? [more inside]
posted by indognito on Aug 29, 2012 - 29 answers

Female doctor recommendations for 60 yr. old woman in East Bay, CA with a host of neglected medical issues.

Female doctor recommendations for 60 yr. old woman in East Bay, CA with a host of neglected medical issues. [more inside]
posted by thenewbrunette on Aug 28, 2012 - 8 answers

My Pussy Is Not Rioting, Thanks.

So I've got some questions about my (aging) vagina. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 23, 2012 - 18 answers

Mother's memory loss

How to talk to my mother about her encroaching dementia? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 5, 2012 - 14 answers

Hormonal Birth Control Question #3493, you are our next contestant! Come on DOWWWWN!

I've been on Ocella (Yasmin) for about 4 years now. Like a great relationship, things started out wonderfully, but I think my baby-making hormone changes are coming between us. [more inside]
posted by Sayuri. on Aug 3, 2012 - 6 answers

twitter + science!

I'm interested in psychology, public health, and aging. Who should I be following on Twitter? [more inside]
posted by leedly on Jul 27, 2012 - 4 answers

Will learning to orgasm through masturbation help me through my divorce?

Will learning to orgasm through masturbation help me through my divorce? Female, been married 10 years, left because of verbal abuse, disturbed by reawakening of my sexuality now I'm "old" (nearly 40) and unloved. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 10, 2012 - 12 answers

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