I am seeking book recommendations to prepare myself and my husband for adoption. Do you know of any reading material that is just fantastic and must be read, or that was very helpful to you? Further clarification inside.
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 2, 2013 -
9 answers
My wife and I have talked of adopting a dog for a while. Following the untimely passing of one of our cats, this is more feasible, and could help console us. But we have questions for adopting a dog in our desert climate, and on dogs coming into a family with a baby, and a cat. And we're concerned about being good owners, as our time at home is limited during the week. Also, we're discussing what a good age range for an adoptable dog would be. Details inside.
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posted by filthy light thief
on May 3, 2013 -
31 answers
What are the chances an openly polyamorous couple could adopt an older child from the foster system?
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posted by tomatofruit
on Apr 17, 2013 -
13 answers
I impulsively adopted a Maine Coon mix over the weekend. Now I'm realizing this may have been a stupid thing to do given I have a Persian and am already drowning in cat fur. Should I return him before I get too attached?
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posted by raw sugar
on Apr 15, 2013 -
27 answers
A sweet mama cat and her kitten were abandoned at a friend's house outside of Austin. I agreed to foster them for a bit, but we're going on week three, and tensions are building between the fosters and my two regular kitties. Bonus complication: Mama cat has now gone into heat (I think). Yikes.
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posted by pantarei70
on Apr 8, 2013 -
6 answers
Late 30s, unplanned pregnancy, unstable relationship, confused. This is my first time posting here so please bear with me. I'm in my late 30s, divorced, with a 9-year-old child. For the past 2 years, I've been involved with a man I love dearly...however, our relationship has always been rather tumultuous. He has bipolar disorder, and when we met, he was not taking medication or under any type of psychiatric care. I didn't know how to handle his mood swings, irrational accusations of infidelity/dishonesty, and controlling behaviors so I broke up with him. A few months later he contacted me and said he was under the care of a psychiatrist, medicated, and stable. We got back together. Things were better, but still rocky at times. We were engaged for a few months last fall, had another falling out, and got back together. We decided it was best to hold off on marriage for a while. He owns his home but is currently unemployed, living off savings and has tenants who are essentially covering the mortgage.
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posted by kribensa
on Apr 3, 2013 -
55 answers
I'm looking for a book meant for small children, probably around age 6, about adoption. The cover pictures a white couple with two adopted (non-caucasian, I think, probably of different races) children. It would have been available at least in 1987-1990 (kind of fuzzy on the year) in New Jersey or thereabouts, USA. It was an English language book.
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posted by two lights above the sea
on Mar 14, 2013 -
7 answers
My wife and I have a 3 year old, which for the sake of anonymity we will call John. He is the joy of my life, but biologically speaking, not mine. I am wondering if we should tell him, if so, how, and at what age we should tell him?
Any Mefites who have experience either adopting or being adopted who have helpful input on this, it would be greatly appreciated.
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posted by anonymous
on Mar 1, 2013 -
32 answers
We are thinking of adding another cat to our household, and need help choosing the right one - shy or outgoing?
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posted by tr0ubley
on Feb 24, 2013 -
14 answers
I adopted a dog on Saturday, a Silky Terrier mix. He had just gotten to the pound the day I adopted him, having been dropped off by a family who said they couldn't afford him. He's a very sweet dog and hasn't made a peep since I got him (seriously, not even a whine). Thing is, he won't eat. He's eaten maybe five tiny pieces of Kibbles and Bits and hasn't relieved himself in solid form, despite many walks. I finally gave in and gave him canned food and he took a bite, then ran off with the remainder, dropping it in the middle of the hallway and not touching it after that.
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posted by amiableamy
on Feb 11, 2013 -
36 answers
I am of one race/ethnicity; my partner is of another. No kids. How will adopting a child from a third background impact him/her?
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posted by anonymous
on Jan 30, 2013 -
22 answers
Adoption. There's too much about it on the internet. Can you help me find the wheat without dealing with too much chaff?
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posted by Anonymousness
on Jan 6, 2013 -
15 answers
How can I help my adopted cousin learn to love her skin? Have you been part of a transracial family? What did you find helpful or comforting?
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posted by turniphead
on Dec 17, 2012 -
15 answers
My bf was adopted out of Asia. He's never sought out his birth parents. Should I encourage him to?
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posted by anonymous
on Dec 1, 2012 -
43 answers
What do I need to consider when working with Santa to put a surprise kitten under the tree on Christmas morning?
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posted by headnsouth
on Nov 24, 2012 -
22 answers
I am looking to adopt a dog, but first I want more information. I live in Seattle. I'd love to find a dog group/dog place where I can go, ask questions, maybe even get to know some different dogs, but I've lived in Seattle for more than 20 years and I've seen how ridiculous, make-PETA-look-sane, over the top animal people here can be. Is there a dog place/group in Seattle that is kind to people?
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posted by susandennis
on Nov 15, 2012 -
14 answers
failover in adoption records opening requests: what happens if a party is deceased?
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posted by mwhybark
on Oct 22, 2012 -
6 answers
What's the best way to adopt a Boston Terrier (without waiting months and months)?
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posted by amoeba
on Oct 21, 2012 -
9 answers
I have one daughter, she is 5.5. We always planned on having 3 children, but spacing turned into fertility issues turned into daughter will likely be 8 by the time we actually manage to have another offspring. Help me figure out the various pros/cons of having 2 more kids v. having 1 more kid/adopting a school age kid/ having 1 more kid/ leaving well enough alone.
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posted by dadici
on Oct 15, 2012 -
33 answers
How much legal weight does a shelter dog adoption agreement carry if the original adopter (who signed the agreement) has died?
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posted by anonymous
on Oct 11, 2012 -
10 answers
Cool or uncool: your spouse gets a second dog from a local shelter without asking or consulting you?
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posted by fatllama
on Sep 7, 2012 -
88 answers
Can you recommend a reputable adoption blog? (for discussion and self-education)
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posted by maryr
on Sep 5, 2012 -
7 answers
My father's grandfather was adopted with very little paperwork or evidence trail as to his biological origins. Earlier this year, my father's uncle got his DNA tested. Unfortunately, the closest Y-DNA relative we've isolated from the tests is 13 generations back. But, I have a related question: All of the matches, through multiple services (having manually entered the data into other services) have a wide variety of non-repeating last names. Given that Y-DNA matches father-to-son, wouldn't there be at least
some names repeating?
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posted by thanotopsis
on Aug 30, 2012 -
25 answers
My father and stepmother have rejected my son, after I placed him in an Open Adoption following his birth earlier this year. How do I deal with important family events where both parties would be welcome and invited? Snowflake details within.
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posted by erasorhed
on Aug 6, 2012 -
21 answers
My wife, a card-carrying permanent resident alien living in the U.S., allowed her German passport to expire and is seeking a renewal through the German Consulate in New York City. She has her documentation mostly in order, including German birth certificate, but needs to show proof of a name change that took place during an adoption in Iowa when she was four years old. Difficulty: Iowa adoption records are sealed. Looking for advice on how to best request a copy of the documentation, or provide a suitable alternative. Comprehensive details inside.
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posted by Joey Bagels
on Jul 23, 2012 -
5 answers
In the wake of a
recent hoarding incident in Pennsylvania a local shelter has a large number of chihuahuas who will soon be needing permanent homes. I have previous experience dogsitting a family member's chihuahua for long periods of time so I know how to take care of adults, but some puppies are also available for adoption and I think that might be a rewarding experience. Everyone in the household has experience with dogs, but we have not raised a puppy. I was wondering if you could link me to the best guides for what to expect and how to raise a puppy, and specifically for the unique challenges of a chihuahua puppy.
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posted by furiousxgeorge
on Jul 22, 2012 -
4 answers
My husband and I are in the waiting stage of domestic newborn adoption with an excellent agency. We have reason to believe that our wait is likely to be a short one (0-6 months), and could go from "Hello, you've made a match" to "Guess what, it's time to meet the baby -- like, now" in a nanosecond (these are late 3rd trimester matches). In the meantime, we're trying to get ourselves ready to be ready to be parents, and to put our various houses in order before the much-longed-for life-altering event happens.
Parents of AskMe, what do we need to do to make ourselves ready? Added complications inside!
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posted by anonymous
on Jun 12, 2012 -
27 answers
Would an adopted child take on both parents surnames in the case of same-sex parents?
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posted by cazoo
on May 27, 2012 -
31 answers
Attention therapists, social workers, and counselors of Metafilter: Suggestions of books and resources to equip a couple in their late fifties planning on adopting a 17 year old girl.
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posted by Poppa Bear
on May 16, 2012 -
6 answers
Mefi animal lovers, I adopted two bunnies ~6 months ago from the local house rabbits society. A few surgeries later, my finances are on the brink. I am now up a creek, and thinking about returning them to the society. How can I be sure I am making the best decision possible for all parties involved?(bonus, adorable pics!)
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posted by satori_movement
on Mar 6, 2012 -
12 answers
Help me think through whether we ought to find a new home for our dog. Long, special-snowflake details inside.
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posted by linettasky
on Feb 22, 2012 -
15 answers
Help me think of a few comebacks to say to people to knock them off their high horses when they try to guilt me into adopting both children and animals by making me feel inhumane, uncharitable, and selfish if I don't.
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posted by squirtle
on Jan 2, 2012 -
67 answers
I vaguely remember reading an argument that in some situations, giving birth to a kid or two rather than adopting is not particularly worse (perhaps environmentally, or in terms of effects on population growth, or resource consumption, or something along those lines--the big picture/the global future.) Yes, I realize this sounds counterintuitive, but can anyone point me to such an argument?
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posted by needs more cowbell
on Dec 1, 2011 -
6 answers
Adoption after infertility and loss: how did you reconcile the grief of not conceiving a biological child and come to find joy in the process of adopting?
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posted by anonymous
on Nov 29, 2011 -
14 answers
