Asking for a friend. Relationship of a few months has devolved from serious emotional manipulation to actual physical abuse. This guy is unhinged - violent outbursts followed by desperate apologies, text messages, showing up at her house unannounced. How does the process for obtaining a restraining order work? How long does it take? The most severe incident happened today (I'll spare the details). If she filed a police report today, could she get the order immediately? Within a few days? Is a restraining order the same as an order of protection? Or..... will a restraining order just make things worse and jeopardize her safety?
When a child is in therapy, is it recommended to have parent meetings with the therapist if one of the parents has a history of violence toward the other? [more inside]
There have been threads about simple pleasures before, but I'm asking as a person fresh-out of an abusive relationship. I feel like I've been missing a lot of the little things that I used to enjoy and even took for granted, and I'm at a loss. I need be aware of simple pleasures in order to recharge myself while I do all of the emotional/psychically/mentally draining work of recovering from all this. Examples after the jump. [more inside]
I read a study online somewhere that physically abusive men on average wait three years before escalating to physical violence. Does anyone know the study, and can you give me a link? [more inside]
What are some good helplines and other resources for women in abusive relationships in the Netherlands? [more inside]
As I was reading this question today, I was reminded of my horribly abusive ex-boyfriend, and googled him as I will do every once in a while. (I left him 11 years ago, so it's maybe once or twice a year these days.) Usually I never find anything, but today I found his unblocked Facebook profile, where I quickly found out that he has a live-in girlfriend - and they have a young child together. I've been sick thinking about this, since he did many things while we were together that make me believe he's not a safe person to be around a child. [more inside]
About a month ago, I left a partner who had rapidly escalated into severe verbal abuse with me. We were together for a couple years but only lived together for three months. He has mental health issues and is treatment-resistant and talks about suicide, and I am worried about him. We are no contact at present, but he's on my mind almost 24-7. I'm wavering that I did the right thing by leaving, even though I felt endangered. I need to be bombarded with support from all sides to counteract his brainwashing and help me know I did the right thing and I really will be happier one day. I know Metafilter is especially good at this so I am turning to you for help. [more inside]
I am looking for someone who has expertise or personal experience with domestic violence. This person should be comfortable with public speaking. Possibly a survivor of domestic abuse either as a victim or a child witness. There are many organizations who deal with education/resources for victims or potential victims. I am looking for someone who includes potential abusERS in their ideal audience and talks about how to recognize controlling behavior in oneself, how to avoid becoming an abuser for people who grew up witnessing abuse, etc. Geographic location does not matter. I was hoping to get a list of resources, experts, organizations.
Nutshell: I need a reputable, authoritative source of data about how many times the average victim of abuse/domestic violence/intimate partner violence returns to the relationship. [more inside]
Active domestic violence and emotional abuse in the unit above me... Help us brainstorm, are there other things we can do as neighbors with long ears? [more inside]
I realized last night that I need to get out of my emotionally abusive marriage. I'm really scared for a lot of reasons. For those of you who have been in my shoes, how did you "come out" to others about your situation? How did you cope with people who told you you brought it on yourself? [more inside]
I'm about to begin volunteering at a shelter for battered women and their children. The shelter also operates a 24/7 crisis line for women who have suffered from abuse and violence, including sexual assault. What should I know before I start? How should I prepare? What was your experience like? [more inside]
Last night, a close friend of ours was the victim of a domestic dispute. Her live-in boyfriend became convinced of infidelity in the relationship (a relationship that was headed to the dumps anyway), came back to their apartment, violently pulled her off of the couch screamed at her and repeatedly punched her in the stomach. Police were called, no charges filed (Red flags here). Now she and the daughter are staying with us, but are afraid to return home. Where do we go from here? [more inside]
Scary roommate situation. I want to leave and I'm trying to figure out if I have any way of getting my money back, which I really need to help me get another room. [more inside]
My stepfather abused my sister a few weeks ago. She walked out of the house, but then reconciled a week later. What should I do? [more inside]