Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with abortion

Looking for information about second-trimester abortion

Anonymous — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 20:12:35 -0800

I am looking for information about therapeutic abortion in the second trimester. I am 18 weeks pregnant and just got back an abnormal result on my quad screen. Today I went in for a level II ultrasound, which showed massive hydrops, pericardial effusion, and several other markers for a chromosomal abnormality. We are waiting on amniocentesis results, but the consensus among several doctors was that this baby would die well before term. We are probably going to have the pregnancy terminated. I am looking for any experiences anyone has with late pregnancy termination, e.g. what the procedure is like, recovery afterwards (both physical and mental), etc. Anyone who doesn't want to post here can email me at losingmybaby@hotmail.com

Sources on the side effects of oral contraceptives and the health risks of abortion

Anonymous — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 20:54:38 -0800

I'm a girl in my early twenties who's recently started having sex with my first partner. I'd like to read some trustworthy sources about the side effects of oral contraceptives (worried in particular about weight gain and diminished libido) and the health risks of abortion (worried in particular about reduced fertility). Can you please recommend some reading material? (Online only -- I currently don't have access to a real library, although I do have remote access to databases my university subscribes to.) Thanks for any help you can provide!

# of abortionists killed?

resiny — Sat, 05 Sep 2009 12:37:20 -0800

How many abortionists have been killed in the last 30-or-so years? I was discussing Tiller's murder with a friends a few days ago, and he made the claim that "hundreds" of abortionists have been killed by fundamentalist Christians. That seemed absurdly, unbelievably high. I tried doing some google searches, but I couldn't find anything other than stories about Tiller. I can't imagine there have been more than 3 or 4 in the last decade or more. Is there anywhere I could find numbers?

abortion and pain meds

Anonymous — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 12:47:20 -0800

I'm having a medical abortion and I think my gynecologist forgot to prescribe pain meds. Yesterday I took the pill that stops the pregnancy and today I'm taking the pill that completes the abortion. My gyn mentioned something about writing a prescription for pain meds but I didn't realize until just now she never gave it to me. I called her office but it's closed. I don't have an emergency number. Apparently this is going to hurt a lot and I am freaking out. Should I not take the second pill and wait until tomorrow and call my doctor then? Should I take OTC pain medication?

How feasible are mobile abortion clinics?

Sully — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 12:13:44 -0800

How feasible are mobile abortion clinics? A little while ago, Dr. George Tiller, one of the last providers of late-term abortions was shot and killed. I, like many people, reflected on the insanity of that.

I read a few articles and discovered that for a long time, pro-life demonstrators would gather outside of his clinic and rally. It struck me that the kind of high emotion at these rallies contributed to an atmosphere were a single killer would feel justified to act on what they were all thinking.

I read another article that talked about how now that Dr. Tiller's clinic is shutting down, and protesters didn't have a target anymore, that many of them were left out of sorts, unsure where to direct their anger, what to do with their Sunday afternoons.

So I thought, well, if the clinic is a focal point, what if we remove it?
What if we have mobile abortion clinics?

They would be in plain white vans, so that they would be hard to target. Those seeking abortions can meet them without throngs of protesters attempting to dissuade them. They can likely travel to more far-flung rural regions where there may not be an abortion clinic close by.

A quick google search brought me to this article, which suggested to me that it might be possible on a purely utilitarian level, but knowing China's history of human rights abuses, I wasn't sure how comfortable or humane these vans would be. I was hoping that someone who was familiar with abortion services would be able to reflect on the feasability, the pros and the cons of such a service on wheels.

Why is my period so weird?

Anonymous — Sun, 17 May 2009 12:17:22 -0800

Question about menstruation after an abortion. I had an abortion a few months ago and, when I restarted my period, my period was/is very different than it was before. I now have these big blobs of blood, which never happened before when I had my periods before the abortion. The first time I had my period, I freaked out and called the nurse practitioner all panicked and she said that my period would be different now because I had been pregnant. I don't understand why, though and I stupidly didn't ask. I've been googling endlessly and only come up with forums where someone asks a similar question and is berated for having had an abortion in the first place.

So, why is my period so different now than it used to be? Is it normal? Will it stop being blobs and return to what it used to be like?

Edwardian New Yorkers views on contraception and abortion

Phlogiston — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 15:11:54 -0800

I recently read a novel which made me curious about attitudes toward contraception and abortion in the Edwardian United States, in particularly in New York City. In the first decade of the twentieth century Ludwig Lewisohn married a woman two decades his senior. He very much regretted the consequences and, after fleeing to Europe some years later, wrote The Case of Mr. Crump, a thinly fictionalized account of the years he spent with his wife.

The bulk of the book is devoted to chronicling Crump/Lewisohn’s wife’s various personal failings and unpleasant habits. Several passages related to abortion and contraception struck me as surprising.

The first mention comes up in the context of a discussion of Crump’s wife’s prior marriage, and the financial infeasibility of bearing more children.

…Herbert used to be filled with a horror-stricken wonder at the fundamental facts in human life which no novelist revealed, which even physicians would not permit themselves to discuss. … It was impossible to let all the children be born. Yet there was no knowledge of even the simplest contraceptive methods and Anne was too slovenly and lazy even to get up to wash. Too happy-go-lucky, she had a gambler’s hardness and freedom from immediate care. Two glasses of beer and to bed. The rest would take care of itself. It didn’t, in fact. With the inevitable result of a long series of abortions, some brought about by surgical interference and politely called curettages, others effected by a plentiful use of quinine and gin.[sic]

(The situation described in the above passage would have begun in 1880s Chicago and continued into 1900s New York.)

Later in the narrative, Herbert begins an affair with Anne and she leaves her husband. Herbert plans a trip to his family’s home in South Carolina, promising to return but intending not to.

In the weeks prior:

[Anne] did her best to enmesh Herbert in soft, strong tentacles, to play upon the physical habit established between them, upon his compassion, upon his sense of honor. She let herself become pregnant, brought on a mild abortion at the end of eight weeks, and so, shortly before his departure appeared white, devoted, gallantly suffering for his sake.

(The above passage refers to events in 1900s New York.)

Later in the narrative, while Anne and Herbert are living with Herbert’s German immigrant parents in South Carolina, the following incident occurs:

That day, when Anne was drunk with gin, [Herbert’s] mother had expressed a mild surprise. Anne had tossed her head. “Well, upon my word, to hear you talk, one would think you’d never had an abortion. I’ve had twenty!” And Herbert had seen his mother who, after all, was six or seven years older than Anne and a born Viennese, blush like a girl.

Some years later, when Anne is past her childbearing years, Herbert implores her to divorce him citing, among other things, his desire to father a child. Anne observes that she had been pregnant by Herbert before and that he’d never shown any desire to see her carry the fetuses to term, which he concedes is true.

Lewisohn was the son of lower middle class German immigrants. He grew up in South Carolina and attended college in New York beginning in the early 1900s where he associated with sexually progressive avant-garde poets.

From the passages above it seems that he expected women to be able to reliably exercise control of their fertility.

He also seems to have had no ethical objection to abortion. The Crump character is his literary alter ego, and I believe that he didn't expect his readers to be scandalized by these views, though he concedes that novelists don’t generally speak openly of the subject.

He does, however, seem to have regarded it as distressingly gauche to discuss with the prior generation. He also seems to indicate that surgical abortion was reliably available during the Comstock Era and relatively affordable to the working class.

I’m familiar with a great deal of condemnation of contraception and, particularly, of abortion during the time periods in question, and I'm familiar with occasional defenses of contraception by, for example, Emma Goldman and E. B. Foote. I can’t, however, recall running across any similarly frank, period accounts acknowledging that the practices were widespread and acceptable to the writers. In particular, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a contemporary writer assume that women should be able to reliably prevent conception.

Can anyone point me at similar late nineteenth and early twentieth century memoirs, novels or letters that articulate similar views?

What is Obama's current stance on the Freedom of Choice Act?

beelerspace — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 15:52:58 -0800

Obama said in 2007 that signing the Freedom of Choice Act would be the first thing he'd do. Is that still true? I am pro-lifer voting for Obama. It seems to me that his overall economic and education policies will lead to fewer abortions in the US. His rhetoric, particularly his 2006 Call to Renewal Keynote Speech, appears to chart a new "abortion reduction" policy that falls somewhere between pro-choice and pro-life (if a little closer to pro-choice).

Yet, I'm at a loss to explain to friends his assertion that the first thing he will do in office as president is sign the Freedom of Choice Act. It doesn't really fit his rhetoric or his general approach to politics, nor does it seem like a particularly wise thing to do politically (cf. B. Clinton, gays in military).

But I'm having trouble wading through the seemingly limitless and in some cases extremist pro-life websites to find a more reasonable analysis.

Help!

Does my female partner need to know about past relationship abortions?

anonymous account — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 12:42:21 -0800

Should I tell my girlfriend about the abortion in my past relationship? I have been in a relationship for about 8 years now.

Should I tell my partner about the abortion that one of my previous girlfriends had after I impregnated her? This was about 10 or 11 years ago at this point. I do not have any contact with the previous girl, and have not since we broke up (well before I began dating current girl).

Would she want to know about this? Would she care about something that happened that long ago? It's not something that I think about that much or have any regrets about at all, but it seems strange sometimes to have that one big secret.

How did your abortion affect your relationship?

Anonymous — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 22:59:22 -0800

After a lot of soul searching and discussion, my partner and I have decided that we're going to terminate this pregnancy we've found ourselves in the middle of. In light of this impending (and quite probably emotionally draining) event, we would like to know the experiences of other couples who have had an abortion, specifically how it affected your relationship with one another. We are a loving couple who have been together for almost four years. We get along swimmingly pretty much all the time and we're deeply committed to one another (so much so we're getting married next year).

The baby is about six or seven weeks along. The termination will likely happen within the next fortnight.

The decision to terminate the pregnancy has come about after a great deal of soul searching, tears and discussion. This decision is a mutual decision, although it was a difficult one to make.

Because we love one another and don't want to see the good thing we have end, we're worried about how this will affect our relationship after the termination has happened. We know and expect that there will probably be some rough times right after the termination, but we think once we get through that we'll be OK. But we also think it would be useful to know what lies down this road we're about to embark upon, so that we might be better prepared for it and perhaps learn from the experience of others.

I set up a throwaway e-mail at mefitermination@gmail.com for anyone who doesn't feel like sharing their experiences publicly.

Also, since this is a hard enough time as it is, leaving the moral judgements out of this thread would really be appreciated, thanks.

i'm (not) keeping my baby

Anonymous — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 09:03:44 -0800

i live in dallas-fort worth, texas and i'm getting an abortion. i'm an adult and i am in a relationship. i do not have insurance.

is there anything i should prepare for? what type of abortions are open to me? is there a better place to go to have this done (i'm willing to travel if it's really worth it)? if you've gone through this were there after effects you weren't anticipating and could have prepared better for had you realized? any particular locations, doctors, etc that are better than others?

if you'd rather keep your answer private, please email me at anonformefi@gmail.com

(i know this is a hot button issue and you may have well meaning advice, but this is the course of action that i'm going to take. please don't try to change my mind)

Can I make my sociopathically selfish ex Be There for me?

Anonymous — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 12:18:20 -0800

I'm scheduled to have a medical (pill) abortion in a situation involving my optimistic, scientifically brilliant, clueless ex-boyfriend. For some irrational reason, he's the only person I want with me while I go through with it. We dated last year, for three months when I was still very new to the city, and we were pretty darn happy. He was kind, attentive, respectful, and engaging. Then he had drunk sex with an ex-girlfriend who'd been pursuing him for a while. I was, of course, crushed, but I had just moved to a new place and he was my only contact. He persuaded me to take him back, and I finally relented, and then he broke up with me again a month later citing a heavy work load and little free time. A few weeks later he changed his mind again, but I told him to get off my doorstep, throw away the bouquet of flowers, and quit sending me apology letters. He persisted trying to get me back for months, but things eventually died down between us. He began dating another girl but always made it clear that if were I ever willing to try again, he'd be open, which repelled me more.

Recently we started going out to dinner and resumed the compelling dynamic we had before the cheating period, and wound up having (totally safe) sex several times. This was during a sad, lonely time in my life in which I had realized that after an entire year I still wasn't over our break-up, and I'm not proud of my egregious hypocrisy of sleeping with the same man who did this to me while he's dating another poor girl. He's in an "open-ish, don't-ask don't-tell" relationship with a girl of whom he speaks with a mixture of admiration ("she's so loyal") and indifference. I get the impression that without the policy, she'd be doing much of the asking, and he'd do the telling. He has admitted that he has always loved me, that he is biding his time with his current girlfriend as a gesture of respect to her for sticking with him as he got over me. When I discovered I was pregnant, he immediately came over and we discussed the steps we needed to take to end the pregnancy.

He is a bizarrely optimistic, scientific creature, and told me point-blank that he didn't necessarily see the abortion as a terrible thing, that it felt like an evolution of our relationship. He told me upon entering my apartment that he needed to be gone in an hour to "keep up appearances." He seems chastised, repentant, but also utterly removed. He hedged when I told him I need something more out of him, not a relationship--neither of us is ready for a real relationship after what we went through--but a gray area between fuck buddies and the relationship he seemed to be offering me this past year, to get me through this period.

While I have wonderful friends kindly offering their support, my ex-boyfriend is the only person I want with me when I take the pills (which I hear is moderate-to-severely painful for several hours), because this is his doing as well. I'm unsure if I should demand that he take care of me, demand that he be there for me more readily, or if I need to kick him out of my life for good. Part of me wants him to see the ramifications of cheating, of sacrificing other people's well-being for his own. Is wielding my abortion as a Life Lesson manipulative or justified? I honestly think I'd feel better if he could feel, or witness, a little of what I'm going through, but maybe this is a lost cause.

We're both 25 and live in New York, if that's somehow important.

Philosophy please!

ssg — Sat, 26 Jan 2008 23:17:05 -0800

Please help me find writings about the relationship between men's and women's reproductive rights. This recent post reminded me that I'd been meaning to do some reading on the relationship between the reproductive rights of women, specifically the right for a woman to control her body and thus to choose to abort or not abort a fetus, and the rights of men and women to choose whether to reproduce and their responsibilities to their offspring. I accept the primacy of the rights of women to control their own bodies, but I don't feel that the argument that I follow to reach that conclusion is very strong and edge cases (such as the one in the FPP) tend to weaken my argument, so I'd like to do some reading.

Can you suggest books, articles, etc. that deal with this subject? I'm particularly interested in feminist or ethical perspectives; I'm not interested in religious perspectives.

If you tell me "Congratulations", I will barf all over you.

Anonymous — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 18:52:21 -0800

I've recently discovered I'm pregnant, but I won't be staying pregnant, especially now that I know that's what's been making me feel so awful for the last several weeks. But I've missed a lot of work and several social events; people are worried about me. Everybody's always asking me what's wrong. What do I tell them? I started feeling constantly nauseated and fatigued in October. Since then I've been quite incapacitated but as many folks without health insurance are prone to do, I just rode it out the best I could and hoped it would go away on its own. The culprit turned out to be pregnancy, which was so incredibly unlikely that it didn't even occur to me to pee on a stick until last week. Luckily, though, this is a solveable problem, and I have an appointment for a consultation at the clinic later this week. The surgery itself won't take place until next week sometime.

I never wanted to be pregnant, and as abortion seems like the most none-of-your-business of all surgeries, I'm sort of stuck on what to tell people like coworkers and not-closest friends when they ask me (with the best of intentions) what's going on with my health. My boss, for example, knows that I have a doctor's appointment this week (I had to ask for time off to go to it) and will probably ask how it went. I'd prefer to keep the whole thing a secret, but since everybody already knows how sick I've been, that's not really an option.

Any advice about the etiquette of this? Are there any conditions that can make a woman want to do nothing but sleep and puke for weeks on end that I can lie & say I have instead? (only half-joking.)

Throwaway email: sickratherthanpregnant@yahoo.com

does this soviet poster exist?

Mayor Curley — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 09:17:19 -0800

I have heard several reference to a Soviet propaganda poster that I can't find. Maybe it's a hoax, perhaps you've seen it. You might even know where I can view it. The poster advertises the availability of abortion in the case of unwanted pregnancy. Under that is Jesus's mother Mary, with a word balloon or caption saying something to the effect of "If only I had known!"

A professor in the mid 90's asserted that it existed, but I don't think she said that she had seen it personally. I once met a man who claimed to have seen a copy for sale in a book stall in Eastern Germany c.1993, but the conversation took place in a bar and we all know how credible bar talk is.

I can't find any discussion of it on the Internet in english, and it would be more effort than it warrants for me to try to do it in my very limited Russian. Have you seen this poster? Do you know where I can see it? Perhaps you have read about it and concluded it's a myth. Any info is appreciated.

How much does an abortion cost?

bilbo baggins — Sat, 17 Mar 2007 10:25:34 -0800

What is the average range cost for an abortion? I know there are different procedures and costs most likely vary depending on health insurance? But I just need some basic idea because I cannot talk to a health professional until monday, and I want some idea. Please no moral judgements!

fetal soup w/ ginger and orange peel

trinarian — Sat, 10 Mar 2007 20:01:43 -0800

FetusSoupFilter: Looking for an exhaustive report into a terrifying rumor about Chinese diet that seems to have more legs than any report of infanto-cannibalism should. [editor's note: confirmed hoax. -c]

Simple question: Do Chinese eat aborted fetus?

At core, I'm as skeptical as every one of you, but... on one side we have Snopes and About dismissing this outright as racist trash [as I originally did], but then you have this, the entire nation of the Philippines convinced that they do, and my Chinese friends here telling me with a straight face that they personally eat fetus. Chinese aren't known for their dry humor. Even my Chinese-American co-worker tells me her mother has been offered fetus while sick at the hospital.

It fits in with the Chinese mentality that eating X in an animal helps X in a person, thus if you drink a lot you should eat liver, etc.

I'm looking for exhaustive reports on the issue from a credible source.

Surgical or Medical?

Anonymous — Wed, 31 Jan 2007 16:24:29 -0800

Surgical or Medical abortion? Today I found out I am pregnant. I am probably about 5 weeks along. I have never been pregnant before. I do not plan on continuing with the pregnancy. I talked to Planned Parenthood today and they inquired as to whether I want to choose a surgical or a medical abortion. I was wondering if anyone had any reasons why one was a better choice than the other. I talked a long while to the woman there, but she was very resistant to give me a recommendation one way or the other. Thanks for your help.

How do you respond to news of a recent abortion?

Tuwa — Sat, 09 Dec 2006 21:38:46 -0800

How do you respond to news of a recent abortion? Someone I know was expecting in about five months and told me recently she had an abortion. I didn't know what to say, really. She wasn't asking for condemnation or proselytizing, and I wasn't interested in offering any. I hope that you aren't either.

I said something along the lines of "that must have been a hard decision to make." The conversation went well enough, I think, but it's been bothering me since.

I see clear social standards for reacting to the news that someone is pregnant--responses accepted as generally polite, like "congratulations" and "when are you expecting?"--but I don't know what the proper responses are to news of an abortion.

Assuming you respect the person, her beliefs, and her right to make decisions, what do you say to that news? What do you make sure not to say?

Sometime 400$ might as well be a million.

cilantro — Wed, 22 Nov 2006 03:43:53 -0800

Is there a charity that directly funds abortions (and the travel expenses involved for women who have to travel a long way to a clinic) for women who can't afford them? And if not, what are some of the legal issues to consider if starting such a charity?

preggers ex asks for then spurns advice

Anonymous — Fri, 10 Nov 2006 07:28:59 -0800

My ex recently found out she was pregnant. She asked for my advice, then when I gave it, became bitter and told me to sod off. Was I right? I broke up with her six months ago. It wasn't a very friendly parting, considering that I drew the line when she turned physically violent. Her rebound, it turned out, was a married man whose wife was pregnant. Now she's pregnant, and re-initiated contact by asking me for advice after the new "bf" denied any responsibility.

She could have been a character straight out of a Ken Loach film, and given her dubious financial future, and the fact that she was going to try to raise this mixed-race child in Northern England, my advice to her was to abort the fetus, giving the above as reasons for the sake of the child.

She became bitter and told me to never contact her or her family again (after first apologizing for re-initiating contact), breaking off an 8-year relationship.

Some facts:

-she's pushing thirty
-she's white (British), the father East Asian
-she came to this (East Asian) country at my behest to attempt "one last try" which ended as described above
-she's never been married nor had been pregnant before

My mixed feelings:

-good riddance! It was a train wreck waiting to happen, and the more distance from me the better
-guilt: I should have understood how alone she was here, and couched my advice in more understanding terms
-guilt: I should have understood her desire to have a kid, and encouraged her positively
-guilt: I let my own feelings get in the way, and only saw her as a "Ken Loach" character rather than being more understanding

My questions:

Did I do the right thing? Is there anything I should try to do now? Should I forget and move on? Should I call Ken Loach?

And the woman shall say, "Amen. Amen."

Baby_Balrog — Thu, 09 Nov 2006 10:33:04 -0800

It was always my understanding that Numbers 5:11 in the Hebrew Bible refers to an abortive procedure. However... When I brought it up in my OT ex class the other day, several of my classmates were shocked by this and adamantly denied this possibility. I guess I had always assumed that the "bitter water that carries the curse" was an abortive. Here is the passage as it is found in the NRSV.

I should add, as this is incredibly important, that the NIV (my least preferred edition) translates "uterus drop and womb discharge," to "abdomen swell and thigh waste away" (whatever the hell that's supposed to mean) and I pointed out in class that this might be the source of some of the confusion. However, even provided with a more accurate translation, another student suggested that a body of evidence exists that this is, in fact, not sanctioned abortion - but rather some other form of poison that generates a prolapsed uterus.

I think this is ridiculous - given the Israelites probable desire to maintain their patrilineal descent patterns it would seem most logical that a man, upon returning from afar, and suspecting his wife of being pregnant, would immediately demand an abortion to prove that she had cheated on him. There would be no reason to keep the child when there was no way the man could have been thought to be its father, rather, the abortion would provide excellent proof of the woman's infidelity.

My question (finally!) is whether or not this "body of evidence" actually exists regarding this disturbing chapter in the OT and if there have been books written on this topic.

you can't share your genes and you can't touch anyone elses!

Anonymous — Fri, 20 Oct 2006 10:30:53 -0800

My partner and I would eventually like to adopt a child - not immediately but some year soon. I am wondering if my medical history would effect my chances/application? In the past I have had the following - eating disorder related depression (Paxil) (aged 16-18 or so), an abortion (when I was 19), and depression yet again at age 20 - more paxil for a year. For the second bout of depression I didn't feel it was related to the termination, more university related stress ubt my doctor may have thought otherwise. I know that medical checks and history are required (at this stage I haven't delved too much into the requirements of the adoption process) - because I don't want to get too eager about this if it simply not going to happen because of my medical past. I'm 25 now....
And my partner? He doesn't even get colds - so he's fine, I can't remember the last time he saw a doctor! We will be married etc etc when we do attempt to adopt but this is a will my health past screw this up question.

Help me find an abortion documentary.

chrominance — Tue, 03 Oct 2006 15:59:35 -0800

Inspired by this question, I'm trying to find a documentary on abortion I saw in university that is somewhat similar to The Abortion Diaries. The documentary I saw had the same basic premise: several women recounting their experiences. But the execution was vastly different. You never saw the women, only heard their voices; they were never identified in the film, nor were their stories seperated. The effect was a sort of voices bubbling out of the ether, disassociated memories that only gradually formed into semi-coherent narratives. Aside from some statistics about how many women are unable to find proper post-abortion care, or have complications due to back-alley abortions, the film tended to avoid politics (though because the majority of the women in the film had abortions and many did not regret the decision, it's necessarily pro-choice). The words were spoken by actors but taken largely from diaries kept by several women about their experience.

The individual experiences were all different as well: some had their abortions in hospital, others at unlicensed clinics, for example. I think there's even a portion of the script where one woman says something along the lines of "I went home the next day. I felt free." and then another woman says "I cried for weeks."

The visuals were all incidental action: a woman's hands flipping through a calendar, the floors of a hospital hallway as seen from a moving gurney, the bright lamp above an operating table.

I thought tracking down the documentary might give the poster of the other question some insight into the variety of experiences women face during the decision to abort, as well as some idea of what the recovery process can be like. Plus I wouldn't mind seeing it again myself. I was at a Canadian university and so it might be a National Film Board documentary, but I couldn't find it in my cursory search of the archives.

Support through tough times

Anonymous — Tue, 03 Oct 2006 11:07:41 -0800

Supporting my girlfriend in her decision to have an abortion -- what do I need to do? I'm going to drive her to clinic, pay for anything that needs to be paid for, etc. Of course, I still love her through all of this. The circumstances are so extrenuous that we cannot possibly keep the child. Any personal anecdotes would be helpful. Thanks.