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¿How to repair a friendship?

Almost 6 months ago I screwed up a newish friend by vanishing and leaving them in the lurch with a job for a client (anxiety and depression problems, etc). I know the work relationship is absolutely destroyed but, is there any chance of repairing the friendship? I have no idea how to even try to fix this or if it's possible. [more inside]
posted by Memo on Nov 21, 2014 - 8 answers

Pls help this new mama transition back to work after first baby

Just had my first baby, in my very late 30s...yay! I took four months off once the baby came. Before the baby came, some major things happened - i got promoted to supervise my team at work -- and my mom passed away suddenly. Additionally, I had a complication with the pregnancy and ended up going on maternity leave a month early. So, before I left for maternity leave, I was not exactly 100% at work and while my boss was understanding, I may have not made the best first impression in this new position. (questions inside) [more inside]
posted by SanSebastien on Nov 21, 2014 - 15 answers

Is my boss out of line or am I?

My job has an externship program that frequently hires externs once their externship is complete and they have completed their degree. I have been mentoring an excellent externship who have out performed any other extern I have mentored. She is fantastic and I want her for our team but my department supervisor refuses to offer her an job. Complication inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 19, 2014 - 16 answers

Need clinical work experience in San Bernardino, winter break

My connection for clinical work/experience during winter break has suddenly dropped me. I now have a 2k+ ticket to San Bernardino, California and am anxious and scared as to how I should proceed. Help! [more inside]
posted by pink tape red light purple hammer on Nov 19, 2014 - 7 answers

how much is my Phd worth?

I have no full-time work experience outside of assistantships and internships. How much should I expect when I enter the non-academic market? [more inside]
posted by inevitability on Nov 18, 2014 - 12 answers

Do I need a lawyer or a CPA or a ???

Last year, little baby iminurmefi was born, and while I know that there's a grace period where you can say "I just had a baby!" to excuse temporarily dropping the ball on all sorts of life stuff, it's about year past when my husband and I should have gotten our crap together and done that legal... stuff (that's the technical term)... that you're supposed to do when you have a kid and a house and assets and newly-complicated taxes. Estate planning, I guess? I know AskMe can't do this for me, but I am a bit lost as to what sort of professional(s) I need to hire here. [more inside]
posted by iminurmefi on Nov 18, 2014 - 13 answers

How do I handle an emplyee who walked out, then tried to change her mind

Employee H was incommunicado over the weekend, having sold all her belongings and skipped town, leaving me with a minor mess to handle. She left her work phone and company keys on her desk for me to find today, and planned on giving me no notice, or anything. [more inside]
posted by hollyanderbody on Nov 17, 2014 - 74 answers

Great industry but the people suck. Help?

I'm a university graduate with entirely separate vocational training in an industry that always interested me. I've since worked an entry-level position in said industry but I've discovered that the employers and employees alike are similar culturally in a way that I am not. If I were to draw a Venn diagram of my interests and theirs, it would look like this: O O. I can't change everyone, so do I change myself or my job? [more inside]
posted by thethirdoption on Nov 14, 2014 - 12 answers

I'm ready to move abroad. But how does one do that exactly?

I’m ready to make the jump. If you have looked through my past posts, you can see that I have been throwing around the idea of moving for a long time. How does one go about doing that? [more inside]
posted by *lostatsea* on Nov 13, 2014 - 15 answers

Best way to answer the interview question, "How's your attendance?"

So I've been studying up on the interview protocol/got questions and answers from one of the leading temp companies --but I am stumped on this. I have several chronic conditions that need tricky monitoring (usually no more than every 3-6 months, and I try to get as many of them in one day as I can). Most of my docs do not grant appointments outside of business hours. I do have plenty of sick days. [more inside]
posted by intrepid_simpleton on Nov 11, 2014 - 22 answers

Best standing shoes for elderly mom?

My mom (she's 71) continues to work a couple of part time jobs, both out of financial need and a determination to keep working. One of them has her standing on a concrete floor for fairly long periods a few times a week. I'm looking for advice on the best shoes that will keep her as comfortable as possible, ones I can buy online (preferably in Canada) and send to her. [more inside]
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken on Nov 9, 2014 - 30 answers

Print compnay employer is requesting my pay requirements - help

A print company owner is asking me what my pay requirements are to join his staff as an illustrator. How much do people who do this kind of thing make? [more inside]
posted by cartoonella on Nov 8, 2014 - 4 answers

rejuvenate my brain!

I have a very mentally taxing/stimulating job. When I get home from work, I can't muster the mental energy to do anything but surf the internet. Even a supper with more steps than 2 (open and heat) seem overwhelming. Physically, I feel fine. I'm not physically tired, just completely mentally tapped out. It's starting to cause some tension in my relationship because I am no longer pulling my weight around the house. Leaving my job is not an option: it pays well and I love the work. I am looking for ways to have more mental energy at the end of the day to perform multi step tasks around the house and/or socialize. Any tips? Organization? Meditation? How do you get (more) stuff done? Thanks!
posted by tippy on Nov 7, 2014 - 22 answers

Tell me how you have evened out your biorhythms/energy swings.

I noticed something about myself yesterday that I think I need help with. Basically, no matter how happy I am at the start of the day, I am often emotionally and physically depleted by the end of it. How can I maintain my 8:30am levels of optimism, competence and energy so they're not completely gone by the afternoon? [more inside]
posted by fingersandtoes on Nov 7, 2014 - 10 answers

Taking care after a flashback

I had a PTSD flashback today after not having issues with PTSD for a year. How do I stabilize? [more inside]
posted by sockermom on Nov 6, 2014 - 8 answers

Settling for a lateral career move to leave a failing company??

I've been working at a medical supply company since May of 2013. Since the middle of this year, the company has slowly deteriorated for the following reasons: High turnover rate as 17 people have left us within the past 2 months. HR manager and IT director were laid off. Our payroll manager and financial comptroller have left the company for greener pastures. We have lost more than 50% of the contracts with facilities that used to refer patients to us. There's lots of talk that the company may close down going into 2015. The high turnover is demoralizing thus I went job hunting everyday. I recently got a job interview at a place that is 3.3 miles away from home rather than 15 miles for my current work place. I did not get the position that I interviewed for. The vice president picked someone else despite the manager's recommendation for me. However, the manager offered me another position available and took the offer. It's an entry-level position that's only a dollar more than what I currently make. I was hoping to get the other position that paid 3-7 dollars more since I had relevant experience and a recent Bachelor's degree in Health Admin. Did I make the correct decision in accepting the first job offer after multiple applications? I really wanted to get into a hospital, but the competition is very fierce and hiring process takes awhile. I was afraid to go down with a sinking ship therefore I had to take a quick bite on the opportunity.
posted by tnar23 on Nov 6, 2014 - 13 answers

How to catch hold of a disorganised boss to resign?

I've gotten a job offer I'm happy with. My boss is the distracted, goalpost-is-always-moving kind of guy. As in, his schedule changes day to day, always last minute, even up to the hour before. How is the best way to catch him to advise of my resignation? [more inside]
posted by glache on Nov 4, 2014 - 18 answers

How does a nomadic 1099-er pay state income tax?

Suppose someone has the ability to work 100% remotely in the US for a company as a 1099 contractor. He has a permanent residence in state A. If he travels around the country over the course of the year, 3 months at a time in a new state, would he need to pay some state income tax for each state, or would he pay state income tax for state A only? If my thinking is correct, that it depends on state law, then how is this enforced if he is, say, living in an RV?
posted by alligatorman on Nov 3, 2014 - 12 answers

FMLA in Massachusetts?

I am an employee in Boston, MA who is strongly considering taking a medical leave of absence. Please help me to understand my rights. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 2, 2014 - 7 answers

Why do I regret turning down this job opportunity?

Four months ago I was laid off from a company where I had worked for almost 15 years. I received a severance equivalent to 30 weeks of pay. About half of that was paid to me in bi-weekly paychecks while I could still technically be called an employee of the company. The other half will be paid in a heavily taxed lump sum check in the next week or so. more inside... [more inside]
posted by getyourlife on Oct 28, 2014 - 7 answers

Cross Country Move: New Job or New Lifestyle?

I am moving across the country. Do I keep my current job and commute by plane or do I leave that job and find new work there? (... many details within...) [more inside]
posted by milqman on Oct 28, 2014 - 24 answers

Is this a motivation issue or what?

I think I'm dealing with some motivational paralysis, but it's a little complicated. Any ideas MeFi? [more inside]
posted by myitkyina on Oct 27, 2014 - 14 answers

How does FMLA work after a patient's death?

It seems like FMLA leave doesn't account for bereavement time. What, then, do I do, after the person I'm caring for (my father) dies- just pack up and immediately fly cross country and go back to work? What about dealing with his estate? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 27, 2014 - 16 answers

Advice for moving on from the past?

Currently, looking for additional resources to help overcome negative experiences in my past. Yes, I'm in therapy and medical care already. [more inside]
posted by chrono_rabbit on Oct 26, 2014 - 9 answers

How to give employees unwelcome news

Half of my team makes widgets and half of my team makes sprockets. Next week, I need to tell my widget-making employees that we are cutting back on widget production and ramping up sprocket production -- they will start making sprockets 25-50% of the time. How do I make this unwelcome (but needed) change in job responsibilities suck less for my team? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 25, 2014 - 7 answers

Team building Smeam Building

We're having our semi-annual meeting at my office and me and another co-worker have been assigned the task of coming up with two activities for the 40ish people in attendance that will take 10-15 minutes long each. Help me come up with some interesting, fun, not cliche activities for our group. [more inside]
posted by PuppetMcSockerson on Oct 24, 2014 - 12 answers

Being your own boss

You work for yourself. How did you get there? What is it like? [more inside]
posted by showbiz_liz on Oct 23, 2014 - 17 answers

I think I'll stay here for awhile.

I was traveling through Central Europe last month and stayed in some pretty cool hostels. The staff were really cool and hung out with you, and were more like friends than your typical hostel staff. One thing I noticed is that most of them just landed there. Some have been there 3 months with the intention to stay another 6, some have been there a year. They just happened to visit for a few days and then started working at the hostel. My question: how is this done? I have a hard time believing they could get a work visa for this sort of thing, or does that exist? Or do people that do this just come on your typical 90-day tourist entry and illegally stay longer and just deal with the consequences when they leave?
posted by signondiego on Oct 22, 2014 - 13 answers

Can a software company in California insist employees limit drinking?

Can a software company in California insist that employees participate in a system that limits drinking after hours? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 21, 2014 - 13 answers

How do you measure a software engineer's productivity?

I’ve been told that my productivity at work needs to improve, and that I should think up three ways in which my manager can measure my productivity and its improvement. Difficulty level: software engineer. Wall of snowflakes inside (longer than expected, sorry folks!) [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Oct 20, 2014 - 32 answers

Help me find good working music!

I work a typical 9-5 job. Sometimes my job is routine, sometimes it is project management, sometimes it is complex thought. I am getting tired of listening to the same couple of albums at work, so I am extremely interesting in finding some new music that I could work to. [more inside]
posted by bbqturtle on Oct 20, 2014 - 11 answers

Company in turmoil; how to talk myself down off the panic ledge?

My company is undergoing the first steps into being sold. How do I stop panicking long enough to figure out my next steps? [more inside]
posted by droplet on Oct 15, 2014 - 7 answers

Mission Impossible: Having a relaxing weekend

I had a rough meeting at work this afternoon and now I'm confused, sad, and hurt. Help me focus so I can move forward. [more inside]
posted by kat518 on Oct 10, 2014 - 21 answers

How do I stop asking for help?

I have my first post doc job and am feeling out of my depth most of the time. I also don't have much supervision and can easily panic with problems that I don't know how to solve. I keep reaching out to my former PhD advisor that has given clear signs that he doesn't want to help anymore. Help me stop. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 9, 2014 - 21 answers

Jobs Like Journalism, Minus the Writing

I've been working in either journalism or communications for a few years now and while I like it a lot, I feel like I still haven't quite found the right job. What are some career trajectories for someone who is really good at research, loves talking to people, and has an overwhelming sense of curiosity, but is tired of writing everyday. [more inside]
posted by forkisbetter on Oct 8, 2014 - 14 answers

Can I add coworkers on LinkedIn?

In my new job, there is a clause in the contract which says "you must not signal on your professional networking profiles that you work for company name". Would adding colleagues count as signalling that I work for the company? [more inside]
posted by iamsuper on Oct 7, 2014 - 11 answers

Anything to be done? Great job but supervisor doesn't like me.

The very good news: A couple months ago I started a new job that I love. It's a high stress career, but basically my dream job. I get along well with almost all of my colleagues, including my peers, the big boss (person in charge of the organization), and big boss's second in command. [more inside]
posted by picardythird on Oct 6, 2014 - 13 answers

How to look for a job efficiently in the internet age?

The last time I went job searching was through answering ads on Monster. Everything was fairly straightforward. I would send my resume, go on an interview, get an offer or not. Now the advice is to network, use LinkedIn, find a recruiter, and figure out how to optimize keywords to defeat bot filtering while registering online. I’ve tried this without any success. Is there a better way to beat the system? Someone break this down for me. What actually works? [more inside]
posted by adapt on Oct 6, 2014 - 15 answers

Taking The Counteroffer Still Bad Form?

I told them I was underpaid. They didn't believe me. I got another job and resigned. Now I hear they're putting together a counter offer. What to do. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 4, 2014 - 30 answers

Music for my opium den

Please help me find music that's mellow, percussive, and contemplative, but fades into the background and lets me concentrate on my work. [more inside]
posted by atchafalaya on Oct 3, 2014 - 20 answers

What to do if I'm being paid less than agreed upon in an interview?

I recently took a part-time job tutoring at a nonprofit, and was told that I'd get paid $X/hr. Today, I was pulled aside and told by my supervisor/interviewer that I would instead get paid $Y/hr. I should have confronted her about it at the time, but I wasn't confident that I could think clearly in the moment so I asked for some time to think things over. What should I do so that I can get at least some of this back? [more inside]
posted by coolname on Oct 1, 2014 - 23 answers

How to support someone who uses nonbinary pronouns at work?

I supervise a youngish person who is sort of like an intern at my job. They told me on the first day that they prefer to use a variation of their name and the pronouns "they, them, and theirs." Great! But how do I get my older coworkers to sign on for this? [more inside]
posted by chaiminda on Oct 1, 2014 - 31 answers

Take this job offer?

I turned down a job offer. I regretted it, and then I got laid off. Then I asked them again and interviewed with a bunch of other companies. I got the offer again, but there is another company I really like. Should I just take it since it's a "bird in hand" and it's the second time, or should I ask for more time and consider all my options? [more inside]
posted by pando11 on Sep 30, 2014 - 9 answers

How do you get to work in a studio apartment?

I've got a 480 square foot studio. The layout's fine, and I've got a desk and kitchen table to use, but I never want to do that, actually I don't feel like working at all when I'm home. How can I set things up so I will? [more inside]
posted by cotton dress sock on Sep 30, 2014 - 12 answers

Help me be stronger and more resilient

Self defeating thoughts make it hard to get things done. I want to be able to enjoy my time at school, but my low self confidence causes a lot of anxiety. Is there a way I can shift my perspective? [more inside]
posted by winterportage on Sep 28, 2014 - 7 answers

How can a lawyer get a real job after a long absence from the workforce?

46, lawyer, musician. I have been fallow for an extended time and am coming out of a bankruptcy and divorce. I have a couple years experience as a criminal defense lawyer (from 4-5 yrs ago) but haven't really done much since. I don't want to continue in criminal law. I find jobs that are intriguing but my resume is spotty at best. So how do I write an effective cover letter and create a resume that doesn't reflect my lazy attitude toward work these last few years? [more inside]
posted by werebad on Sep 27, 2014 - 5 answers

How to not let negative coworker get me down?

I work in the same department as a very good friend of mine, we'll call him Tom. Tom hates his job and is very vocal about it all the time. I don't know how to deal with this. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 27, 2014 - 33 answers

What are the pros and cons of supervising others at work?

What are the pros and cons of supervising others at work? I have never supervised others in my entire working career. Given my story beneath the fold, should I consider doing so? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 26, 2014 - 13 answers

Too much free time - should I get a second job or learn some skills?

So, I recently moved to a new (small) city and started a job with a government agency. I am finding myself with more free time than I need, so I was considering trying to get a second job to pay off some debt. My other thought is to use this free time to build some useful skills, possibly something like programming or web development. So what do you thing? Am I better off working for money to help pay off debt or investing my time in learning skills that could earn me far more money in the future? [more inside]
posted by aka_anon on Sep 26, 2014 - 8 answers

To Quit My Job and Move to Montana in October or Winter in Chicago?

Mr. fancydancing and I are toying around with the idea of moving to Montana. I'm not super happy in my job now and both of us want to get out of the Chicagoland sprawl. But fear is holding me back. Why? And what kind of jobs can I apply for that are more in alignment with my interests and values? [more inside]
posted by fancydancing on Sep 26, 2014 - 4 answers

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