Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with Wit

Looking for writing similar to Wendy Cope and Dorothy Parker

whats-in-a-name — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 11:50:46 -0800

Please recommend some witty poetry and/or prose in the same vein as Dorothy Parker and Wendy Cope!

Help me gain the wit that Iain M. Banks thinks I should have.

Nufkin — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 09:42:13 -0800

In Look to Windward by Iain M. Banks there is a part where one of the Estodiens say to Quilan, 'I hope you have the wit to realise you past two little tests there, Major, not one'. It appears that I do not have the wit. Possible spoilers inside. This comes after Quilan's training when he first meets the second Estodien. One of their helpers circles around behind him and instead of him taking the hand offered in front of him. He spins and crouches down in his 'defense position'.

One test he passed was to know that he was about to be attacked; but what was the other? Was it as simple as him spotting someone who was out of place and a potential threat? But doesn't that just link into the 'first' test?

Wit in Romeo and Juliet

Non Prosequitur — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 20:50:21 -0800

Romeo & Juliet: I seem to remember a portion in the play where someone exhorts "wit" to help them out, or says they're running out of wit—but I can never find it when look through the stuff. Is it just a false memory, or maybe something mentioned very much in passing? I searched through the text again and maybe Romeo saying, "But 'tis no wit to go" is supposed to have a double meaning (we shouldn't go to the event, I have no wit remaining?)

Mercutio saying, "Come between us, good Benvolio; my wits faint": this just seems very straightforward; I'm looking for an exhortation, or a request of sorts ("help me out, Wit!")

Witty romance novels

laumry — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 05:48:45 -0800

Anyone have recommendations re funny, satirical/barbed but also charming, romantic novels? A novelistic equivalent to something like His Girl Friday would work - i.e., something where the comedy is not just a gentle undercurrent.

Would strongly prefer ideas where the characters are witty fast-talkers or are in comic situations, to stories where the narrative voice snarks, however wittily, on earnest characters.

Thanks!

No zingers here

reenum — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 18:52:59 -0800

How can I cultivate a quicker wit? I have a decent sense of humor. I can make jokes and people will laugh. When I regale people with my (prepared) bon mots at parties, there are hearty chuckles.

However, when someone snaps on me, I have a hard time coming up with a retort or a comeback. I'll inevitably come up with something lame and make myself look as lame as they allege I am. I'll usually come up with something later, but it's too late to go back and say anything at point (think George Costanza and the jerk store).

So my question is this: Are there any techniques or methods I might employ to become quicker witted?

Snark vs. Wit

Tube — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 22:06:21 -0800

What is the difference between snark and wit? The first entry in the Urban Dictionary claims that "snark" is a portmanteau of "snide" and "remark". Obviously the word is much older than that, but perhaps in this sense the etymology is correct. Having read lots of Michael Quinion, I'm wary of these types of claims.

I checked Webster's Third International, but all I got was a synonym of "snore" or "snort", chiefly a British usage...

I don't have immediate access to the OED.

Frankly I think I first encountered the term "snark" here on Metafilter, and I've been somewhat confused trying to figure out its meaning through context.

Sometimes it seems to mean humorless negativity, as you would expect from "snide remark". But other times it seems to mean what I think of as "wit", a carefully crafted short remark that includes humor, which may or may not be biting.

Sadly, I understand the meaning of "asshattapalooza" better than "snark".

Errr ... uh ... ahhh ... yo momma!

WCityMike — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 20:19:32 -0800

Mefites, help me be clever yet immature on the playground of our lives. I need to know how to more effectively tell someone he's a boogerhead. Scenario: stranger does something annoying and I choose to let it go and move on, or comment. 95% of the time, I let it go. 5% of the time, I comment, and perhaps 3% of the time, it escalates to a brief exchange of words.

At the moment, I'm morbidly obese. I've lost almost 20 pounds from my highest weight. It obviously ain't gonna happen overnight, but in the meantime, it's just what I'm wearing, not me (without going into a whole Stuart Smalley routine) and it doesn't bug me that much.

But in the meantime, it's the first thing the other person reaches for. I'm actually not insulted anymore; it might've bothered me once, but nowadays I actually kind of chuckle at how unoriginal it is to grab something so obvious. [Guy's thoughts: Errrr ... he's fat! So ... "Shut up, fatass!"] But what does bug me is that, because I'm not good at the whole "yo momma!" come-up-with-insult-quickly thing, I end up kind of going at the moment "urrrrrr ... ".

So I'm looking for some clever comebacks to the "debate opponent" hauling out the "fatass" or "fattie" remark. (The comeback doesn't necessarily have to involve fat, though — just anything that's fairly universal, and good. The kind that'd have a crowd going "Oooooooooooooooooo!")

At the moment, if I have the presence of mind, I usually unbotheredly chuckle and say, "Verrrrrrrrrrrrry creative."

It lacks something. The "yo momma" vibe, I suppose. And it does have that sort of "I'm insulted but laughing it off" vibe. Given that I'm not insulted but just trying to make fun of the unoriginality, that's not the desired vibe to project.

So ... how can I more effectively do the "U-G-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi, you ugly"¹ thing?

Two minor preferences for responses.

First, it would be good if the comeback can be fairly universal, and doesn't need to be tailored to something specific about the person. That way there's not a pause that would be needed for the "examination of opponent - thought - integration of response into insult template" process.

Second, yes, name-calling is kiddie playground stuff. But you can't tell me that you've never found yourself wanting a handy comeback in a situation akin to this. So doing a whole "childish" riff or the whole "it's better if you avoid disputes like this by doing procedure x" — *nod* understood, and I agree with you. But this is for rare, not constant usage: I don't plan to use these except once in a blue moon, but I'd like it handy in order to more adroitly slap 'em down when they go for the obvious.

¹Annoying, evil, chipmunk-y but nonetheless funny song.

How to be handsomely witty?

Galen — Mon, 02 Jul 2007 21:37:43 -0800

How can I learn to be scathingly witty? Most of the people in my life are bright intellectuals with sharp tongues. I wish to compete with them in repartee. How do I learn "double entendres, repartee, paradoxes and plays on words" (Ridicule [1996])?

It's not so much a matter of vocabulary, but quickness of response. I often stumble upon the correct response thirty seconds later.

Ridicule notes, "The soul of wit is to know one's place." How do I learn my place and the proper place for banter?

Who else writes the kind of essays that David Foster Wallace writes?

scarylarry — Fri, 28 Jul 2006 05:42:55 -0800

I really like the essays that David Foster Wallace collects in _A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again_ and _Consider the Lobster_. Which essayists take a similar approach? I've just read and thoroughly enjoyed DFW's two collections of essays/reviews (in fact, I liked them better than I've liked his fiction). I find thrilling the way he combines esoteric and hyperintellectual meditation/contemplation, travelogue, personal anecdote, and hilarious self-depricatory wit. I'm well-read in fiction, but haven't done much essay reading outside of an academic context. What other collections (or individual essays) might I enjoy? On KCRW's Bookworm, Wallace was compared to Thurber, who I've put on my reading list. Who else? Thanks!

Help me make a clever employee bio page.

yogurtisgenocide — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 16:25:26 -0800

I'd like to make an interesting and funny bio web page for the student employees in a college IT department. Can anyone suggest some funny questions to include in the bios? I'd like it to include name, home town, year in school, and all the rest of the normal stuff. I'd also like it to include some silly and completely unrelated questions, like "Can you touch your nose with your tongue?" or "What movie could you watch fifty times in a row?"
Problem: I'm not very clever. Can anyone suggest some funny questions to include in the bios?