I always hate my voicemail / answering machine message. I feel really lame whenever I say any of the little scripts I have heard or thought up. NEW VOICEMAIL MESSAGE SCRIPTS please! All ideas welcome, from simple to funny to irreverant. (Or even pre-recorded messages I could download, good songs, anything!)
posted by nomnomnom on Oct 16, 2009 - 52 answers

I don't want people to leave me messages. What's the best way to say this in my outgoing message? [more inside]
posted by thebazilist on Sep 16, 2009 - 43 answers

Is there an easy way (meaning minimal downloading of stuffs) to convert a voicemail into a ringtone? PC and non-jailbroken iphone (and I wish to keep it that way). Thanks.
posted by ilikecookies on Sep 10, 2009 - 5 answers

How do I access my office voice mail from home? [more inside]
posted by silverstatue on Aug 18, 2009 - 9 answers

How can I rid my office phone of an (incorrect) persistent "You Have VoiceMail" alert? [more inside]
posted by stepheno on Jul 22, 2009 - 7 answers

A question for IT and telecoms boffins: Help me understand voicemail. Specifically, what would need to go wrong with a mobile phone company's voicemail server for it to randomly connect customers to the mailboxes of complete strangers? Is it more likely to be an isolated technical glitch, a systemic network security problem, intentional foul play, or something else?
posted by embrangled on Jul 21, 2009 - 9 answers

Verizon voicemail - Is there an option to return the call of the person who left the message? [more inside]
posted by l33tpolicywonk on Jul 1, 2009 - 5 answers

I'm an ATT Wireless customer and I just upgraded my phone (to Samsung Eternity). Everything works fine, except that people can't leave me voicemails. [more inside]
posted by mahamandarava on Apr 25, 2009 - 8 answers

How can visitors leave a voicemail / audio message on my website? [more inside]
posted by sinbarambam on Jan 14, 2009 - 6 answers

How to get a specific non-800 phone number to FAX & voicemail? [more inside]
posted by ggruschow on Dec 8, 2008 - 3 answers

How can we get voicemail from the cell phone to the computer? [more inside]
posted by misanthropicsarah on Nov 24, 2008 - 21 answers

Is there an easy, and free, way to send group voicemails and SMSs? [more inside]
posted by cocoagirl on Sep 19, 2008 - 10 answers

I'm looking for a good personal voicemail service that can replace a home phone number. [more inside]
posted by dammitjim on Sep 2, 2008 - 8 answers

Why does my cell phone send me a text message whenever I retrieve my voice mail? [more inside]
posted by jessamyn on Aug 15, 2008 - 13 answers

Any way to save the voicemails on my iPhone to my macbook pro? [more inside]
posted by ryecatcher on Jul 28, 2008 - 5 answers

After being lied to repeatedly by my credit card company (PC Financial), I have two iPhone questions: 1) How do I get voice mails from my iPhone onto my computer? and 2) how do I record calls made on an iPhone? I have the 1.0 version of iPhone and an iMac if that makes any difference. Thanks!
posted by dobbs on Jul 16, 2008 - 7 answers

My small business needs a permanent phone number with several easily customizable voice mail boxes. [more inside]
posted by my homunculus is drowning on Jun 3, 2008 - 8 answers

I am a verizon cell phone customer and just got rid of our landline. We are a family of 5. Three teens. I hate getting voicemail. Should I cancel this feature on my cellphone? Do any of you run your life just fine without voicemail? My kids all text me. For example, a friend just called me and left a message to call her back. I do not want to call her back! If I did not have voicemail I would not be obliged to call her. I know it sounds like I am mean but I just hate the phone. Any ideas?
posted by seekingsimplicity on Jun 2, 2008 - 26 answers

Some colleagues want to set up a voicemail system in the US for a small tech company in Australia and we need some intelligent, welcoming American female voices that sound at ease with technical jargon to do our answering messages. Any adult age. Slight accents ok. I haven't really been impressed with the sound of professional voice models - they're a bit too slick for our image. Any other suggestions? [more inside]
posted by zaebiz on May 20, 2008 - 13 answers

Asking for a friend: Is there a way to recover a month-old voicemail message on T-Mobile? [more inside]
posted by rajbot on May 6, 2008 - 6 answers

Is there a service that will allow me to seamlessly embed a recorded voicemail into an RSS feed? [more inside]
posted by stuboo on Mar 27, 2008 - 6 answers

I live in a semi-rural area and am incredibly frustrated with my area's landline phone provider. The provider has a monopoly in the area and delays fixing constant faults for many weeks. I want to go completely Skype, wireless and mobile. What are my options? [more inside]
posted by zaebiz on Dec 31, 2007 - 7 answers

I have a voicemail message on my mobile that I'd like to keep -- how can I get it on to my Mac for posterity? [more inside]
posted by bonaldi on Oct 9, 2007 - 7 answers

Does anyone have any experience or can recommend a live call answering service? Scads of details inside. [more inside]
posted by LongDrive on Sep 4, 2007 - 1 answer

What's the cheapest/easiest/best way to implement a corporate voicemail system for a small organization? [more inside]
posted by mikespez on Jul 31, 2007 - 6 answers

Suggestions for a voicemail or IVR (Interactive Voice Response) vendor, capable of saving/converting messages as .mp3 files? [more inside]
posted by avoision on Jul 19, 2007 - 2 answers

How do I record a voice mail message from a landline onto my computer? [more inside]
posted by annathea on Jul 4, 2007 - 10 answers

I've been loving YouMail for the past year, as a replacement for VerizonWireless' sucky voicemail, but I've only now started playing around with it's individualized greeting/"ditchmail" features. I'm looking to mess with my friends & co-workers minds using this feature. [more inside]
posted by melorama on Jun 17, 2007 - 8 answers

We have a perfectly working NT 4 application running on Windows NT4. We need to put it on new hardware running Windows XP. Possible? [more inside]
posted by jldindc on Feb 22, 2007 - 10 answers

I have an old cell phone...a Samsung SCH-T300 to be exact...but it has one feature that I haven't seen on any other new phone...or maybe I just haven't been looking hard enough. It has a sort of built-in answering machine. That is, instead of going to voicemail (which is on Verizon's server), it goes to an "answering machine" that's *on* the phone itself. This lets me do two things: I can actually listen to people's messages *as* they leave them and answer the phone if I choose, and I can listen to voicemail even when I have no signal (since it's stored on the phone). Help me mefi! Are there any current phones that have this feature?
posted by edjusted on Jan 8, 2007 - 4 answers

This question is for women who have used online dating : What are your most common reasons for breaking off an email exchange with a man who you met through online dating? Also, once you have given the man your phone number, and he calls you, what are your most common reasons for not returning the phone call? [more inside]
posted by kenoshakid on Dec 13, 2006 - 41 answers

TelephonyFilter: Is there any Internet telephony provider that will allow you to receive incoming calls, but does NOT require that you have voicemail service? When I spoke with representatives at Skype, they said that the voicemail feature can not be disabled. I would be more than happy to use Vonage, however, due to the way my Internet is set up, it doesn't work (a known issue with this particular ISP). All I want is some way to set up a phone number and receive incoming calls ONLY--with NO voicemail, NO forwarding, NO call waiting. Is there any such service out there?
posted by polexxia on Dec 12, 2006 - 7 answers

How can I set up my own voice mail service? I want to set up something where people buy/rent phone numbers from me and setup voice mail greetings for their friends to hear when they call. How do I go about procuring multiple phone numbers in multiple area codes like "gotVmail" and similar services do? How do I setup voice mail to email? Basically, I want to set up a service like "gotVmail" without 99% of the bells and whistles. Can I do this with asterisk? Any insight into this is well appreciated.
posted by Ezrie on Oct 26, 2006 - 5 answers

I have an old Cell phone from the states ( i just moved to the US Virgin Islands) that I would like to have go to voicemail only (thus keeping the number for if / when I move back to the states and so I dont have to update everyone with my new number (they can just call it, leave a message and I can return the call with my local cell) but I am having a hard time finding a service that accomplishes this. I want to keep my current number (on verizon wireless) but I dont want to pay 40 some bucks a month just for voicemail (thats their cheapest plan) a search online found a few options but they seem expensive... I'd like to pay something like 60 70 80 a year for this... Is that service out there where I can port my number over?
posted by crewshell on Oct 12, 2006 - 5 answers

Looking for a good service (free or paid) to grab voicemail from existing devices (cell, work) and send it as mp3 attachments to my email. [more inside]
posted by baltimore on Jul 27, 2006 - 5 answers

Do you know of a group voice mail service with mobile alerts? I'm looking for a way for my 30+ person band to communicate using cell phones while on tour. [more inside]
posted by squishy on Jul 24, 2006 - 4 answers

My girlfriend handles registrations for swim lessons, and it's a very time-consuming, badly-executed process. I told her that an online implementation of her forms, class rosters, and maybe even payments would simplify the process. Guess who gets to make this happen? (And needs your help to figure out how!) [more inside]
posted by SuperNova on Jul 9, 2006 - 14 answers

Are there any Canadian free voicemail services a la Netzero Privatephone (as seen in the blue)? [more inside]
posted by onshi on Jul 8, 2006 - 0 answers

I need a phone number, preferably a local one, that does nothing but play a recorded greeting/message and collect voicemail. Is there an inexpensive or even free solution? If so, does anyone have any recommendations? [more inside]
posted by grabbingsand on May 9, 2006 - 12 answers

Why are my deleted voicemail messages being resurrected? [more inside]
posted by geeky on May 2, 2006 - 5 answers

Anyone know how to change how many times a Verizon (so CDMA, not GSM) Treo 650 rings before it goes to voicemail? [more inside]
posted by EnormousTalkingOnion on Apr 27, 2006 - 10 answers

I'm looking for a way to have three separate phone numbers all in different area codes with voicemail. I've done some research, and know you can do something like this with skype groups, but my experience with dropped calls on skype makes me wary. Does anyone know of any other ways to do this inexpensively? I'm open to VOIP or standard solutions, is skype my best alternative? thanks
posted by debu on Apr 16, 2006 - 6 answers

I've never had a landline -- just a mobile for the past decade. I got married last year, and the little lady has a landline. We need one where we live, since there's no mobile service. So I forward my calls to the home line when I'm home. The problem is that if I don't answer the phone, the voice mail service doesn't work. How can I make these two work together? [more inside]
posted by waldo on Apr 12, 2006 - 9 answers

how can i set an audio file on my computer as my voicemail greeting [more inside]
posted by christy on Mar 10, 2006 - 2 answers

I have Skype-In with voicemail. How can I download the voice messages for use in a podcast? [more inside]
posted by JamesMessick on Feb 13, 2006 - 6 answers

My call forwarding service is over and done with and I need a new one. Help! [more inside]
posted by arimathea on Dec 26, 2005 - 2 answers

I want to turn my voicemails into MP3s [more inside]
posted by seawallrunner on Nov 9, 2005 - 10 answers

Phone experts: How do I quickly change call forwarding options on my RAZR v3? Also, how do I forward to a line with an extension? [more inside]
posted by designbot on Oct 4, 2005 - 5 answers

Why do I frequently hear static on hold? It doesn't happen every time, but enough that I think there's a reason behind this phenomenon. [more inside]
posted by revgeorge on Oct 4, 2005 - 9 answers

Centrex/CustoPAK vs. Other Phone Systems: Should I get one? [more inside]
posted by jeb on Sep 30, 2005 - 1 answer