Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with STD

How can I explore and stay safe while doing it?

Anonymous — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 14:53:49 -0800

As a woman, how can I have safe sex with another woman? I'm interested in having casual sex for the first time, ever. (I'm not a virgin, just one of those people that ended up in the same relationship during high school and college and... yeah.) I have an IUD left over from the LTR (was with a man), so it's incredibly important that I don't end up with an STD or STI.

I went the meet-women-online route in hopes I could ask for actual documentation that the woman is STD-free, but the mention of that tends to be looked down upon/laughed at. Dental dams also fall into that category, both by people in person and online. I'm not sure if this is relevant, but in case it is, I won't be having sex with men at all. Just not interested.

That being said... How the heck do I stay safe?

AnxietyFilter: had a risky sex encounter 8 months ago, just tested HIV-negative, and still going a little crazy. Help?

Anonymous — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 13:32:01 -0800

AnxietyFilter: had a risky sex encounter 8 months ago, just tested HIV-negative, and still going a little crazy. Help? About eight months ago, I had unprotected receptive anal sex with a guy (I'm a guy) I later found out is HIV-positive. Incredibly stupid of me, something I had never done before, and very out of character. I had no exposures since. I went into complete freak-out mode and, mostly because of anxiety, did not get tested until just last week. I had an OraQuick Rapid blood test done, and it came back negative. Whew. I felt an enormous amount of relief for the first few days following the test, and then the anxiety started to come back as I started thinking about the possibility that it may have been a false negative.

I have another test scheduled for next week. My hope is that a second negative result will finally put my mind at ease. In the meantime, though, I am a complete wreck and can hardly function. Is it completely irrational of me to be worried about getting a possible false negative on a rapid blood HIV test? Or is it a real possibility, no matter how small? Are there any studies or other scientific data on false negative results (my own Internet searches have been less than successful)?

I may just need someone to shake me and say "Stop worrying." I think I have just lived with it for so long that I still cannot get past the idea. Again, I hope that the second test will help - but in the meantime, can you guys give me an idea if I am being crazy for no reason?

When and how to tell my SO I have an STD?

Anonymous — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 08:41:19 -0800

How do I let my boyfriend know I have herpes? When should I tell him? I recently just started a new relationship and I am dealing with genital herpes. I take care of myself and make sure I am clean and take my medication when I feel a breakout coming. I feel I handle it very well. I didn't tell him about it yet because I did not expect to, frankly, fall for him. It's less than 6 months we have been going out also.

What happened is my ex cheated on me and gave me the virus while we were still together. (I only learned of his cheating AFTER we broke up) but at the time I assumed it was from an old girlfriend. It's possible but something inside of me doubts that scenario for he would have infected me sooner rather than as long as we have been together. Anyways, I really respect this new person in my life and we have been intimate and I kinda get the feeling from his conversations that these things worry the shit out of him. I feel horrible. When is it a good time to honestly tell him? I never felt this way for anyone and this is hard for me. Please help.

When do you tell someone you've got oral herpes?

Anonymous — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 20:16:24 -0800

When do you tell someone you have HSV1? So I used to think this was an easy question and now I’m not really sure.

Basically about four years ago I got diagnosed with oral herpes, HSV1. I’d never had a symptom. Never had one fever blister. Nothing. But a partner said she’d tested positive for oral herpes and that I needed to get tested. I’d been tested six months prior (I have great coverage and get tested for everything every twice a year) and had nothing. Now I was positive for it and I went to a specialist.

So for the next two months I went to an immunologist who had me on valtrex because he was having a hard time telling whether I was also positive for HSV2 or whether it was just a cross reactive thing. At the end of two months they figured that something else I was on was interfering with the test. They took me off and there was no more cross reactivity. I was positive for HSV1 but not HSV2. I asked if this meant I should change the dosage on the valtrex.

The doc said that I should stop taking it.

My specialist said with HSV1 it was no big deal and not worth the prescription. I went to my GP for a second opinion. Is this something you disclose to a partner? His opinion was even more cavalier than the immunologist. More people have it than don’t. It’s no big deal. His only admonitions were about condom use.

So I went about my life. I dated. I had a few relationships. And at some point I ended up with a girl who was a virgin (and for what it’s worth, it was something I didn’t know about till afterwards). We had regular sex with condoms and I performed oral sex on her without any protection

I’m pretty sure you can see where this is going.

Eight months down the road she’s sick for a week. She doesn’t call me. And when she finally comes over she says “you gave me herpes.”

Apparently she got it when I was shedding the virus and didn’t know it. And going down on her did an oral to genital transmission. I was her very first sex partner and I’d basically scarred her for life. We broke up and it shook me for a while. It shook me pretty hard.

I only really started not feeling guilty everyday when I saw on facebook a few months back that she’s happy in a relationship now and seems to be doing okay.

But immediately after, I ended up going back to an ex who I knew had HSV1 and I think I stayed with her for the next six months as a default position just to not have to face dating other people and trying to figure out how to deal with this. Unfortunately we were just as wrong for each other the second time and broke up again. And now, after a respectable distance, I’m ready to date again.

Only I’m not sure what the protocol is here. When is a good time to tell someone this? After the first date? Before the first kiss? Before sex? Do I stop performing oral sex? Am I overreacting? I don’t know how to go forward her and I’d like some advice.

Gardasil off-label for men in SF

Anonymous — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 15:44:17 -0800

Who in San Francisco will prescribe Gardasil off-label to men? I figure there's probably a couple doctors around here doing it. Maybe someone practicing in the gay community? I'm a 29-year-old straight male. I want to be vaccinated against HPV because:
1) I care about your cervix, baby.
2) I don't want warts on my dick.
3) Thumb my nose at Jenny McCarthy?

According to most sources, 29 is pretty old to get the HPV vaccine. But I think that's because most 29-year-olds are already saturated with a hundred different strains of HPV. But the first time I had sex was a month ago. So I figure I have a sexual history similar to the target demographic.

I realize I'll have to pay around $400 for the vaccine. That's fine. I'm going to ask the doctor to sign some insurance paperwork anyway. I want to try and make my health insurance pay for it. I see it as a low-stakes test drive of the HMO bureaucracy. It'll be valuable experience if I ever need to fight them over something important.

I'm particularly looking for names of doctors or clinics that are known to prescribe to men. I can poll the usual places myself if no one here has a more specific recommendation.

Are those gosh durned kids really having as much free love as the Tv says?

reenum — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 12:24:24 -0800

How accurate are the media portrayals of young people engaging in risky sexual behaviors? Recently, I've noticed that a lot of media outlets seem to be sensationalizing the sexual practices of people in their teens and 20's. These sources would have you believe that these groups are always 'hooking up', they prefer oral sex to kissing, and that now engage in sexual activity first and date if the experience is positive. Things along those lines.

I'm 30, so I was a teen in the early 90's. I find it hard to believe that sexual mores have changed all that much in the last 15 years. Obviously, I don't get much action, so I can't speak from experience. Have things really become as open and free as the media would have us believe?

Are there any studies or news stories that give statistics of how prevalent sexual activity and risky sexual behaviors are in teens and twentysomethings? Anecdotes are also welcome.

How long for gonorrhea medication to work?

Anonymous — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 12:06:16 -0800

How long does it take for gonorrhea medication to work? Past few days I had intense pain peeing and a disgusting white discharge coming out regularly. Went to the clinic today and they said it was almost certainly gonorrhea. They did tests etc. but gave me the medication right away. One big pill, don't remember the name, then two smaller ones for chlamydia, which they said often came with it. I'm in a lot of discomfort and would love to know (and stupidly forgot to ask) how long it would take before my penis would stop throwing up in my underwear and reminding me of my stupidity ever time i have pee.

Should I be concerned about a casual fling with someone with herpes? (NSFW-ish)

Anonymous — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 18:38:26 -0800

Should I be concerned about a casual fling with someone with herpes? (NSFW-ish) I'm exploring casual sex relationships, and the polyamorous / open relationship lifestyle. I met someone who seems like a good fit for a fling (sane, safe, tests for STDs frequently etc.), and we get along well. However they disclosed that they have herpes (oral and genital), although has not trnasmitted to their partner over the past 7+ years due to prophylactic Valtrex use daily.

I'm new to this, and I am negative for both HSV types. I've read arguement that fear over HSV is more a puritanical issue -- so this makes me question if I should not be so worried about casual encounters with HSV+ partners, too. I didn't plan on using condoms for oral sex, just of anal/vaginal.

Straight answers about HPV

Anonymous — Sat, 16 May 2009 18:19:56 -0800

I'm a straight male, and I have genital wart-causing HPV. I have searched high and low and can't find straightforward answers to a few questions. I need some help! 1: In most people, the virus eventually clears. But since there is no test for men... apart from not warts disappearing, how will I know when the virus has cleared?

2: Please give me a simple list of sexual activities that I can safely partake in without spreading HPV. The only one that I have on my list so far is "looking longingly at each other through a window". I'm worried.

3: Any encouraging words that give me reason to believe that I might not have to be completely celibate for the next 10 years would be welcome.

How communicable is Herpes during incubation period?

Anonymous — Mon, 11 May 2009 17:16:59 -0800

How herpes is infectious during the incubation period? I had sex with someone who has herpes. Then I had sex with someone else within 24 hours. Condoms were used twice, but I know that are not 100% effective when it comes to herpes. I take showers twice and washed carefully between myself, where nothing else on my skin surface is a problem.

This happened recently, so I do not know if I'm still infected, Herpes has a period of 4-7 days of incubation first first symptoms appear.

It is infectious during the first few days or so?

Do not worry, I have the communication, shitting-my-pants, and I-am-a-bastard-idiot of this situation under control, I just have not been able to find the answer to this particular issue.

Thank you.

STD drama and a clinic in London?

Anonymous — Fri, 08 May 2009 15:08:59 -0800

My boyfriend's gonorrhea throat swab came back "equivocal/inconclusive." He's been retested, but results will take two weeks. Meanwhile, I'm arriving to visit him in two weeks and ... we would like to be intimate. Help! He's in London. I'm in the States. I'm going to visit him in two weeks. I'm not worried about unfaithfulness; that's not the issue at all. (We haven't been dating for very long and he got the test just before we got together. They took a REALLY long time to get back to him with this result.)

Normally, they would just give him penicillin to swallow and be done with it. But he's allergic to penicillin. The doctor said that they could give him a shot instead, but that he wouldn't give him the shot without an actual positive result.

So basically I'll be arriving the day he gets his test result. If it turns out to be negative, that's fine.

If it's positive, then he'll have to get the shot. How long would it take for that shot to clear things up so that we're good to go again?

It would also be great if we could find a clinic in London that would do same-day or at least fairly quick results for a gonorrhea throat swab. That way he could find out early next week whether or not he has it and be all cleared up by the time I arrive.

(And, yes, I'll be getting tested again too, but the clinic I go to has same-day results. So it's not a big deal.)

What is Wrong with his Penis?

howgenerica — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 12:51:21 -0800

A friend of mine showed me his penis with some concern. I don't think it's anything, but there were two dark brown freckle-looking things on the tip that probably weren't there before, and he claims to feel strange. Does anyone have any idea what this could be, or if it could be something alarming? The freckles are just minor discolourations and are not raised. Thank you. Prompt responses are appreciated!

Get tested?

Anonymous — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 14:31:30 -0800

Individual health insurance and sti. What to do? I've read through this question, which is kind of related, but it doesn't really seem to answer the question. Anyways, I have an annoying rash that's popped up on my inner-leg, don't know what it is. Never had anything like it before. I want to have it checked out, and get checked for an sti, but I do worry about insurance ramifications if a test comes back positive.

Should I go to my primary care physician, or a health clinic type place to get checked out and tested? What would the difference be, would it matter? I'm assuming my insurance will know about how the test comes back either way, yes? Will I be dropped from my insurance, or premiums increased? Will it be near impossible to get insurance in the future if a positive test comes back? Also, hypothetical question, I'm not seeing anyone, don't really plan on it for the near future, is it a terrible idea to just ignore it? I have individual insurance, and I know insurance differs greatly across the country, but some general advice on not freaking out would be very much appreciated.

A clean pair of clothes...really?

abdulf — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 13:50:46 -0800

Is gym-provided workout clothing safe to wear? I'm trying out a fancy gym close to work that provides work out clothes in addition to towels and other amenities.

It sounds like a great concept. I would rather not carry a change of clothes and then have to handle wet sweaty clothes until I get home. But what are the risks?

The clothes come from a common pool, like towels, so you don't keep your own. Someone else may have worn the shirt or shorts the previous time.

They also provide jock straps, but that's touching a little too close for comfort.

The clothes look and smell clean but I'm concerned about things like skin diseases spreading to me and possibly some sort of STD.

I mean, people buy and wear used clothes from thrift stores after washing them. Is a wash cycle with hot water and soap enough to eliminate most of the risk?

I have little understanding of how hardy virus, bacteria, fungus, skin flakes really are. Please enlighten me.

welcome to the consequences.

Anonymous — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 06:52:20 -0800

I'm worried that I have genital herpes. I don't have any lesions, but I know that's not conclusive, and it's going to be a long, long time until a clear antibody test is definitive. How can I stay sane until then? (You are neither my doctor nor my shrink; I have done my Google reading. ) Twelve days ago, guy comes over to stay for a long weekend. We have five days of crazy, awesome sex. It's been seven days since then.

This evening, the guy calls me and tells me that he likely has genital herpes. He was asymptomatic when we had sex; I believe him when he says that he had no idea. He's a decent guy, and more to the point, right now, during this long, painful freakout, I'm not really interested in apportioning blame. We both had lapses in judgment.

When we were having that crazy, awesome vaginal or anal sex, outside of two very brief intervals in the vagina, he used a condom. He performed oral sex on me, briefly, without a dam. I gave him extensive oral sex, though he never ejaculated or came close to ejaculating. (We were into the crazy, awesome vaginal and anal sex. It felt like love, OK? And I know, I know. As mentioned above. Major lapse of judgment. Wrap it up all the time. Believe me, I have learned my lesson.)

Since then, I definitely have not had any lesions. Four days after the last sex we had, I had some dry genital regions, followed by itching and some burning when I peed, but I wrote it off on account of the time of month/having had sex for the first time in three years. I have a bump on my lower back that I'd put down to a bizarre mosquito bite, despite the fact that I live in a mid-Atlantic city, and it's getting a bit cold. I haven't had any flu symptoms, though the glands in my neck are a little swollen. That might be because of allergy season, though. I get cold sores, though I don't have any now, so I understand thus, HSV-1 in the oral area.

From what I understand, even if I don't get lesions down there, I'm going to need clear IgG antibody tests twelve to sixteen weeks out from the last date of possible transmission in order to really know. I'm also given to understand that antibody tests starting from a month might be good indicators, but aren't nearly as conclusive as the ones twelve to sixteen weeks out.

Help me stay sane until February.

How safe?

Anonymous — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 06:17:41 -0800

How safe is Craigslist? OK I use CL fairly often. I'm a guy and I meet men. Say 3-4 a week? Always safe, always condoms. Never use drugs, never anything with blood or scat or cutting. Test myself every 3 months, clean so far. I have a friend who I let know where I'm going when I go see a stranger so she can call 911 if I don't call her in time.

So how safe is it if I'm sleeping with a 100-odd men a year? What additional steps can I take to keep myself safe?

Anxiety before HIV test

Anonymous — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 07:03:33 -0800

How do I deal with HIV test window period anxiety? I had a risky encounter (unprotected sex) with a girl last week -- I trusted her when she said she'd been tested, which she told me on the way to the bedroom (had she not said anything I wouldn't have asked, and just used a condom). Before the encounter, I thought I knew her pretty well as she'd been a friend for a few months. Shortly afterwards she announces that she has a new boyfriend and cuts off all contact with me. I know I should get tested, but HIV tests aren't conclusive until after 3 months since it takes time for the antibodies to show up. I wouldn't be so worried if she'd still be talking to me. My question is ... how do I deal with the anxiety for the next three months? I don't you to tell me I made a mistake, I know that, and it won't help. I know what I have to do, and that I just need to wait it out -- but in the meantime I've been driving myself crazy with nervousness.

For the next three months I just want to live my life normally and only worry about HIV if I actually test positive.

I also realize that it might be absurd of me to insinuate that this girl is going around deliberately infecting people with HIV ... It doesn't seem likely...

Sharing a sex toy w/o spreading HPV?

Anonymous — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 13:58:51 -0800

What precautions should my partner and I take if we want to share a silicone sex toy without spreading HPV between us? What we've been able to find on the web suggest that HPV can be spread by sharing toys, but doesn't give much practical advice on what to do about it. (For various reasons, the other means of transmission aren't an issue for us right now.) Tips?

Herpes schmerpes

Anonymous — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 18:57:26 -0800

Boy meets girl. Boy falls for girl. Girl tells boy she has genital herpes (type 1). Boy says that's OK, I want to be with you. Now boy wants advice on safety. She tells me that she has roughly 1 outbreak per year, usually fairly mild. She also tells me that she has never, to her knowledge, passed it on to a partner, and she has been in long term relationships where they were having unprotected sex.

I know that, obviously, wear condoms. I also know that condoms are not 100%. But what about other acts: digital penetration, oral sex, analingus? I've had cold sores before (last one was maybe 4 years ago, before that it had been at least 3-4 years) so I assume I have orally the same type she has genitally and that dental dams are probably unnecessary (can I be tested for oral herpes in the absence of symptoms?). I just want to make sure that it doesn't spread to any weird parts of my body or hers. Advice?

HPV Clearance in a journal article

zeek321 — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 18:45:30 -0800

Clearing HPV: Help me understand this journal article, specifically the concept of rate ratio and how it translates into real-world risk. Let's say someone is found to be carrying the hpv-16 strain. Based on this article, what's the chance that they will test negative viral DNA in X number of months? What's a rate ratio?

Can anyone recommend more/better articles on clearance statistics? I'm most interested in the high-risk strains. Here are some more snippets I found that I haven't carefully examined yet.

The question underlying all of this, of course, is if a guy or gal is infected with a high-risk strain, what are the chances that it'll be completely gone in a X number of months with Y confidence?

What is happening to my vagina?

Anonymous — Sat, 23 Feb 2008 06:45:15 -0800

Strange bumps on labia that seem to harbor either small piece of flesh or bizarre unknown creature, bleed profusely after extraction with fingernails then heal up without trace of their existence...this is incredibly embarrassing to ask EVEN under the blanket of anonymity so please be kind. Okay, so I'll try and give as much detail as possible. Basically, I first noticed these bumps--there were only two on the left side of my outer labia--because they slightly itched kind of like razor bumps itch. However, I hadn't shaved this area in nearly two months so it seemed suspicious. Being curious, I started putting pressure on one with my nails, like you would a zit. After noticing that it seemed to get a little larger when I did this, I persevered until a small piece of pink, fleshy matter came out. Upon removal it proceeded to bleed PROFUSELY for a couple of minutes (seriously really strange considering the size of the bump, equal in size to razor bump), then it stopped. Did the same thing to the other one which was near it and the same weird pink fleshy thing came out. The pink fleshy thing is similar size to the bump though it seems a little bigger, so perhaps part of it is under the skin?

Today I noticed that I had a slight itch and saw FOUR of these things. Now, this is months and months later. So WHAT THE FUCK. Did same process, same pink fleshy thing.

Do I have some weird STD? It's possible. The last time I had my annual was March 2007. Is this chiggers? I've heard about these and they make me recoil in terror. Am I dying of some strange flesh-consuming superbug? Any thoughts are greatly appreciated, though I expect many "IANAD but..."s to appear.

To complicate the matter further I am in a non-anglophone country in Western Europe and while I speak the language it is a SLIGHTLY delicate matter and I'm really embarrassed to bring it up. Additionally I have to pay for all medical-related shit up front and then wait about a month to get reimbursed (DING DING DING if you guessed that I'm in France). Basically I'd rather wait until September when I'm back in the Land of the Free (=USA) to get this checked out if that ends up being necessary.

Thanks, hive mind! Now I will go skulk in shame...

Will my health insurance cost go up if I test positive for an STD?

Anonymous — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 21:04:25 -0800

Can your health insurance company raise your rates when you have a positive STD test? Does this typically happen? Long story short, I recently had the occasion to need an STD screening really fast, like by-the-end-of-the-day-please fast (basically I had another date with the um... relevant person and I wanted to be able to say something concrete about the situation instead of just general ickyness).

I anticipated that I'd end up at a planned parenthood or something, but it turned out that the only thing I could find near my work was an express testing service that sends you straight to a lab for all the screenings, no doctor consult or anything. When I asked the guy on the phone about whether they would take insurance, he went off unprovoked about how messed up health care is in this country, and I COULD tell my insurance, but they'd probably double my premiums if I tested positive because they would consider me high risk, and "it's not fair, but that's how it is."

Is this true? I have health insurance through work, and I never had an entrance physical or anything like that, I just got the standard rate for a person of my general demographic characteristics.

The whole ordeal just kind of smelled funny. The price for the lab work was pretty expensive, but not beyond my means, so I just paid for it. I'm OK with the idea that I got ripped off this time; I did need the service, it didn't break the bank, whatever. But I'm curious if they guy had a point or was just completely full of it.

Web searching reveals nothing helpful, at least using the search strings I could think of.

I have an STD, help me determine when to tell him. I'm pertified.

Anonymous — Sun, 16 Dec 2007 09:48:13 -0800

I have an STD and don't know what time is the right time in terms of telling the partner. Please help, I'm scared out of mind! I have had herpes for almost ten years. I am a young female and aquired this when I was very young. (I went a little wild in my teenage years and was very rebellious) It has always been a struggle and an issue that brings me immense shame. I have had steady long term relationships since and have always told the people that I was with. In the past, this was not an issue with my partners. Surprisingly my mates have been rather non-plused. Regardless, it was always exruciating to communicate this to them.

Regarding my herpes, my gynecologist and I have had recent discussions about the location of the break-outs (my rear) and that my steady partners (long term relationships that ended for entirely different reasons) have been tested and it was not passed to them. In each relationship, we stopped using condoms but abstained from sex when I had an occurence. My doctor has said, unofficially, that the location might be the factor that is keeping everyone safe as well as having had it for so long, it might have changed the make-up of the virus.

In recent years, I have become less bothered by having this and would like to help other girls (and guys) who have struggled such as myself. I will eventually set up a web page and a support group, because I feel that there is an immense stigma around STDs and not nearly enough outlets and comfortable avenues of knowledge for people that have aquired the virus.

SO, here is my struggle: I have recently begun dating a beautiful man. We are sexually active, and we do use condoms. (Although a week ago, we had two drunkin woops without protection. I'm also on birth control) We have been dating for three months. He is newly divorced and not ready for a huge commitment (but the more time we are together, the more lovey dovey he gets and the sweeter he is). I am not inclined to rush things, I believe relationships should develop organically. I really like him. He really likes me. I just met his family this weekend. They were wonderful and it went VERY well. I can see this going further and at this point am hoping for more down the road. I have not told him about the STD. Ideally, I would rather wait until we are more official and have spent more time together to open up to him and share this very personal issue. I am afraid to tell him now. But I also think that he may feel betrayed the longer that I wait. He is an amazing individual and maybe over my league... Although, my friends and family tell me that I am insane and he is absolutely not over my league. I suppose I just like him that much. Should I tell him and get it over with? Should I continue to practice safe sex and wait until I feel that we are more secure and that I can trust him with this information? I don't want to be selfish, and I feel that I already have been. I also am terribly afraid of scaring him away.

Viral and bacterial infection at the same time?

Anonymous — Mon, 03 Dec 2007 18:19:44 -0800

So my girlfriend went to the "girl doctor" and was told that she might have chlamydia..ok shocking but no big deal. The doctor also noticed a bump on her rear end..and stated that it was a type of viral infection. Now the doctor tells her that its very uncommon to have a bacterial and viral infection at the same time. That it could be a sign of HIV..... Any truth to this? We are both freaking out now and the test results don't come back until wednesday.. She said she was tested before me and was clean.. I personally was never tested, but my ex-girlfriend was (the only other one I've been with) and she was clean of HIV and everything as well..

Please don't pass the cauliflower: HPV

Anonymous — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 18:05:23 -0800

Okay, I'll just say it: I've got genital warts. I was diagnosed in July after a rather regrettable one-night stand in May. It was a mild case, looking nothing like the scary pictures I'd seen online -- the warts were smooth and flat and fairly small, and all were external. My pap (taken at the same time as diagnosis) was clean, as were my complete STD screens (including HIV).

My doctor gave me Aldara (imiquimod) cream for one month. When I went in at that point for a check-up, she said the spots that remained were more or less gone and it would be okay to stop using the cream.

In the month that followed the warts came back, at least in a couple of places. I filled my refill of Aldara and used it for a couple more weeks, but didn't have any luck. It's not any worse than it ever was, but of course now it's just making me mad. Ever since I came down with this I have felt disgusting, like I'll never be sexually appealing to anyone again.

Something that complicates matters is that I take a drug that suppresses (part of) my immune system, for a separate immune dysfunction. I imagine this is part of the reason I haven't been able to fight off the warts.

And I've tried a high-dose regimen of folic acid and one of the B vitamins that I read about online, which seemed to have no effect.

I'm going to go to a doctor in the next few days, but I'd like to hear from people who've been successfully treated -- what worked for you? Should I do cryotherapy next? How painful is it? How long did it take you to clear? How did you deal with the awful feeling that comes with being "tainted" this way? How are you now? Did anyone have success with Aldara? Any other alternative measures I can try?

(And please, spare the safe sex lectures, etc. I already know. And I'm tested regularly for everything including HIV and will continue to be.)