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How awful are these comments from my new boyfriend?

How would you feel if your boyfriend told you he wouldn't have dated someone like you when he was younger? [more inside]
posted by waving on May 29, 2013 - 78 answers

Defying physics in interpersonal relationships

There are anecdotes, usually of identical twins, who manage to "communicate" even when separated by distance and/or time. One twin just "knows" that something has happened to the other twin. I don't have a twin, but I once had this kind of connection with my then boyfriend. [more inside]
posted by booksandwine on May 29, 2013 - 40 answers

Dealing with distance when I want constant contact and he doesn't

I've been in a relationship with a guy for 6 months. When one of us is traveling, I prefer to send lots of text messages and emails throughout the day, and I want to get messages back. He dislikes written communication and would prefer to have rare, brief phone calls and just wait until we see each other in-person again. What can I do, which won't result in frustration for one of us? [more inside]
posted by cheesecake on May 28, 2013 - 28 answers

What to do when the sickener hits?

How does one handle sudden epiphanies about relationships, the kind of ones that happen when waking one morning and completely reverse your feelings from the night before? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 27, 2013 - 24 answers

How can I talk with my friend about his dating life given our history?

I have a very good friend who I spend time with on a regular basis. In recent history (and maybe probably for the foreseeable future) he has been depressed about his dating life, so naturally, it is a subject that comes up and I discuss it with him. However, given our past history together, it's been a really hard subject for me to discuss with him and I would like some help navigating this from the hivemind. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 26, 2013 - 11 answers

Getting Over A Craptastic Relationship

So, I was together with someone for 16 months and things were 'okay' for most of that time. We moved in together and things rapidly unraveled as I came to some sharp realizations about the way things were going and asserted my needs--she immediately got squirrelly, the relationship ended soon after. I feel like a heartbroken idiot and don't know how to move beyond my pain. The entire saga is inside. [more inside]
posted by yonega on May 25, 2013 - 30 answers

Approaching mid 30s single; telling people to mind their own business?

I am a female and have never been married and live with my cat. After a disastrous relationship where I "attempted" to settle 2 years ago, I have been single. Every time I talk to relatives and "well meaning" friends they keep teasing me that I am a "cat lady" and reminding me of my biological clock. [more inside]
posted by sabina_r on May 25, 2013 - 59 answers

Moving in with my girlfriend, what should I know?

I am moving in with my girlfriend this weekend and would like to know what to expect. What are some things I should keep in mind to help everything go as smoothly as it can? [more inside]
posted by *lostatsea* on May 24, 2013 - 47 answers

How do I keep one (little) footbridge unburned in a breakup?

I am trying to write a short breakup email to someone I need to go "no contact" with for a while... while still leaving a relatively positive line of communication open between us, longer-term. How do I do this? [more inside]
posted by argonauta on May 24, 2013 - 14 answers

Engagement didn't work out - but she's still on the mortgage

So I got engaged and bought a house with my fiancee. We lived together for a couple of years but it did not go well and she moved out. So I'd like to keep the house but do that I'll need to get her off the mortgage and off the deed. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 22, 2013 - 23 answers

How to not get upset if my partner sees my friends' news before me?

A few times, my partner has seen news (on Facebook mostly) from friends such as my siblings and their partners, before I have. I get very upset when this happens. Is this irrational? Is there any good way to cope with it? [more inside]
posted by skippy_gal on May 21, 2013 - 31 answers

Am I being realistic?

I'm getting ready to have a possible "final conversation" about financial responsibility with my boyfriend. I just want to check in to see that I'm being realistic with today's economy. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 21, 2013 - 33 answers

Who originally thought of this dating-related experiment?

Write the numbers 1 to 20 on a set of cards, one per card but two cards of each number, put them on the foreheads of a group of twenty men and twenty women, and give them a couple minutes to try to pair up with the person of the opposite sex with the highest-ranked card: they will always end up with someone close to their own rank. Who originally thought of this? [more inside]
posted by renovatio1 on May 20, 2013 - 7 answers

How old were you when you first genuinely fell in love with someone...

How old were you when you first genuinely fell in love with someone that resulted in a relatively lasting, satisfying relationship? [more inside]
posted by WhitenoisE on May 19, 2013 - 28 answers

DTMFA!

How to deal with people who constantly complain about their relationship, but take no action? [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on May 19, 2013 - 17 answers

Your doubt about my lack of doubts is giving me doubts

I'm currently in the process of moving in with my girlfriend of ~2 years. Everything was going smoothly, but now that I'm half moved in she's scared every day that I'm going to think I've made a mistake. How can I best move forward here? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 19, 2013 - 17 answers

Why doesn't he just break up with me?

My partner of four years has suddenly shut down. What gives? [more inside]
posted by aholeinthehead on May 15, 2013 - 28 answers

How can I be as supportive as possible of an abuse victim?

I've been seeing a wonderful guy for several months now, and I'm very happy. But he's a victim of abuse from a past relationship, and I'm looking for advice/resources on how to better support him. [more inside]
posted by Gee, June! on May 13, 2013 - 12 answers

NOT the Maid of Honor disappointment--swallow or confess

This seems petty, but I am sincerely and exorbitantly bummed out (with some jealousy and hurt feelings to boot) that MY best friend didn't choose me to be her maid of honor. I'm clearly the next-in-line bridesmaid, but I haven't as of yet achieved many positive feelings about the honor I've received, but would like to, and as quickly as possible. [more inside]
posted by lovingkindness on May 13, 2013 - 54 answers

How do I create space with my new girlfriend?

I've been dating a girl for a couple of months and she wants to do everything together. What's a good way to establish boundaries and let her know that I care about her friends, things she does, while not pushing her away? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 11, 2013 - 10 answers

Oh what a tangled web we weave...

Luckily I’m not deceiving, but I have managed to get myself into a very unfortunate romantic relationship with an old friend. Help me untangle myself? A blizzard of snowflake details inside… [more inside]
posted by sarahgrace on May 10, 2013 - 26 answers

Are most guys' minds creepy (or sex sex sex? :/)

Incident report of a young woman and much older upper-middle class man. [more inside]
posted by MiuMiu on May 10, 2013 - 85 answers

I love you so much, and I want to never have your baby.

My boyfriend and I haven't been together for a very long time, but it has already started to feel very serious and I see the potential for a longterm future together. We are both extremely close with our families and I know that family life and children are a huge priority for both of us. We're on the same page there. However... By extraordinary coincidence we both suffer from the same rare, semi-inheritable disease. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 10, 2013 - 25 answers

What to do with a guy I've been seeing for 3 months- now pulling away.

How do I approach a guy I'm really starting to fall for, but who's pulling away at the three month mark? [more inside]
posted by Butterflye1010 on May 10, 2013 - 22 answers

Got the Italian Girlfriend Blues...

Any tips from Metafiltrati with latin/italian lady experience to make things calmer or more manageable? [more inside]
posted by letsgomendel on May 9, 2013 - 43 answers

What to bring home if not the bacon?

Help me cope with my live-in girlfriend's increasingly arbitrary diet [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 8, 2013 - 39 answers

OKCupid reality check for a new dater

I’m a late-30’s woman trying OKCupid for the first time. Can you give me general advice, some tips on keeping my expectations realistic, and suggestions to avoid getting too much of my self-esteem tied up in whether or not Random Dude responds to me? [more inside]
posted by Ms.Stocking on May 8, 2013 - 31 answers

Have you had to divorce your best friend?

My husband of 8 years and I have come to an impasse: he wants a free-love, open relationship because he stifled his sexuality as a religious person before we were married, and I want...well, not that. How do I move forward when it means breaking the most important bond I have? [more inside]
posted by SarahBellum on May 7, 2013 - 28 answers

Obsessed With a Friend

I've been married for 9 years and have been faithful in every way. I recently became close with a member of the opposite sex who I truly value as a friend. But I find myself thinking about this person way too much, and I am not sure how to deal with it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 7, 2013 - 15 answers

Learning how to feel others' feelings

How do I become more empathetic? [more inside]
posted by bumpjump on May 7, 2013 - 11 answers

At least I have my cat?

I'm generally happy with where I am, but lately I've been feeling more and more envy when I see couples and it's getting distracting... [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 6, 2013 - 13 answers

Losing relationship chances due to others' interference - help?

I was recently in the situation where I met a possible new love interest but, due to interference by a mutual social group, the relationship never had a chance to begin. How common is this and how can I protect myself? Snowflakes inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 3, 2013 - 26 answers

Why is my heart so bent out of shape?

I went on two dates with a guy and we clicked so hard. I ended it because he's recently separated from his wife and I'm moving out of state. WHY do I feel so torn up? It's only been two dates! [more inside]
posted by pintapicasso on May 3, 2013 - 15 answers

I have no idea how to get past the honeymoon period. It's killing me.

I have a history of romantic involvements that usually never get past three or four months (with a single exception that went on for 3.5 years). This didn't used to bother me so much, but it's now starting to make me ridiculously sad. I'm 30. How can I learn to hold someone's interest in me and/or choose better? Sorry for the book below, and thanks for any suggestions. [more inside]
posted by oogenesis on May 2, 2013 - 34 answers

Still miss my ex and struggling to move on.

I’m a 31 year-old female. About 9 months ago, a 2-year relationship ended. I’m still struggling a lot with it. How abnormal is this, and what else can I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 1, 2013 - 18 answers

What do I do with these very, very strong feelings?

I just had a weekend (non-adulterous) affair with someone who lives halfway across the country. It went well, incredibly well, so well, and now she has gone back home and I am experiencing a massive onslaught of feelings and I am not sure how to proceed and maintain my sanity. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by My Famous Mistake on Apr 30, 2013 - 13 answers

Completely clueless (Sigh.)

What does the process of finding a life partner look like? [more inside]
posted by strelitzia on Apr 30, 2013 - 45 answers

Help me tell my BFF to shut up, in the nicest of ways.

My best friend is dating a new guy and is currently in the "floating in the clouds" stage. He's all that she talks about, texts me about, emails me about, mentions, quotes, you name it. I'm happy for her, but I am quickly reaching "who cares" stage. She does this with everyone she dates, but this guy might become permanent, so I'm not brushing it off as "just wait until this passes". How can I politely tell her that we need to have conversations about OTHER THINGS? She can be very sensitive, and I don't want her to feel that I am not interested in the relationship or not happy for her. More details inside. [more inside]
posted by ElectricGoat on Apr 28, 2013 - 26 answers

Healthy ways of working with financial imbalances in relationships?

I grew up in a lower-middle-class family. Through a combination of hard work, opportunity and luck, I find myself in my 30's with a very decent net worth. It's enough to allow me to feel very secure about retirement, job/career changes, health issues, supporting family, etc. and this security is probably the most important aspect of money to me. For me, money means security, safety, freedom. I maintain a very middle-class lifestyle, continue to work full-time and save at a reasonable rate. I've started to realize how much this factors into my thinking about long term relationships, especially marriage (and its attendant family joining) and financial co-mingling, and am looking for some perspectives on positive ways of managing these kinds of issues. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 27, 2013 - 21 answers

So very jealous.

How do I deal with this jealousy? [more inside]
posted by Trexsock on Apr 26, 2013 - 13 answers

Twenty First Century Courting

I took a 6 month break from dating to do some soul searching and reevaluate my skewed relationships with men. Along the way, I met some awesome dudes, each of whom I'd be interested in dating. I've developed solid friendships and strong feelings with each of them. Now my self-imposed love sabbatical is over and I'm not sure how to transition smoothly back into the dating world [more inside]
posted by calcetina on Apr 26, 2013 - 11 answers

What is OkCupid like for men?

I'm interested in the male experience when it comes to this popular dating site. [more inside]
posted by thank you silence on Apr 26, 2013 - 36 answers

I love my girlfriend, but cannot shake this feeling.

I have been dating my girlfriend for 2 years and am very much in love. She is bipolar and it is affecting my emotional and mental health. I cannot shake these feelings of leaving her but I know love is hard to come by. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 22, 2013 - 25 answers

What advice would you give me if there might still be a chance?

I’ve had a small crush on a co worker that later turned into a pretty big one. It’s gotten to the point where I couldn’t get her off my mind and it was hard focusing on school work. I’m 25 and haven’t had much dating experience. In my younger years, middle school throughout high school, I had self esteem issues with being overweight and then with acne. I’ve come here seeking advice from a wide verity of experiences of both genders. I found a similar case to mine on here and found the answers very useful so I hope to get great advice from this community. I apologize in advance for a long winded background story but I wanted to make sure I get enough information out to aid you guys. [more inside]
posted by uberkrn on Apr 15, 2013 - 21 answers

I just found out my ex got married, I'm hurt, why do I feel down?

Over the past 5 months I've posted three questions here on how to get over my ex. I've tried all the advice people have given on here and it has helped. Recently I thought I was almost over things and in a good enough place to work on being genuinely friends. Then she tells me she just got married. I don't know if I'm more shocked that she got married to someone in less than 5 months or just that she's just married. Either way, she doesn't want to communicate anymore, which I can respect. So is the reason I'm feeling down is because I feel rejected again? I know this should conclude things for me but I still think about it and I know I shouldn't. Why can't I just leave it and move on?
posted by kser333 on Apr 14, 2013 - 26 answers

How to have a healthy relationship with my anxious parents.

How to have a healthy relationship with my anxious parents. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 11, 2013 - 9 answers

I'm a miser, he's a spendthrift - how do we compromise and coexist?

So, I'm with this guy, and we hope to spend the rest of our lives together. I'm a Millennial saver* and he's a Gen X spender. He has a middle class income (around 40k), and I make half of that. When it comes to our arguments, it may also be of relevance that he's a human and I'm more of a Vulcan. How do we reconcile our opposing viewpoints about finances, trust, and gadgets? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 11, 2013 - 60 answers

recommend films about weird relationships

What are some good movies that straddle the line between character studies and psychological thrillers?
posted by timsneezed on Apr 10, 2013 - 65 answers

how do you get over your first "lover"

He was my first everything, and I can't get over him even months later. [more inside]
posted by wholecornandsalt on Apr 10, 2013 - 27 answers

Need perspective on inter-family conflict

My mother and mother-in-law have had a falling out due to a misunderstanding on my mother-in-law's part. My mother-in-law lives with me and my mother is due to visit in the summer (she lives abroad). Before I collapse with stress, I need some external perspective on this issue. Help! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 8, 2013 - 15 answers

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