299 posts tagged with Relationships and sex.
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Music for the bedroom?

What are some songs I can use to mask the noise of sex so I can be polite to my roommates and allow my girlfriend and me to fully enjoy ourselves? [more inside]
posted by mtphoto on Sep 9, 2015 - 28 answers

It Really Has Been That Easy For This Pretty Boy

So, I am married to a very pretty guy. We are both mid 30s. His entire relationship history includes women just throwing themselves at him, so he hasn't had to ever make any effort to learn how to be romantic or initiate foreplay. His current method is to just tell me he wants to have sex. When I complained that his method wasn't enough for me, he asked me what I want him to do. It is like I'm dealing with an adolescent boy. What resources could I steer him towards that don't include a sex therapist?
posted by LilithSilver on Aug 11, 2015 - 22 answers

How do I tell s/o they need to change everything they do in bed, for me?

I'm wrestling between not trying to date this person - who's one of my best friends - and trying to make it work. The problem is the sexuality - either the chemistry is off, or it needs to be adjusted. I just don't know *how* to do that, without hurting his feelings, or if I should at all. [more inside]
posted by meeeese on Aug 10, 2015 - 13 answers

How do you define a sex addict?

A close friend and confidante of mine has started a new relationship, but she's questioning what's "normal" for sexual appetites. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 5, 2015 - 30 answers

Boyfriend extremely pushy with sex

I have been seeing someone for 4 months. Quite a few times he was very pushy with having sex while I am sick or during period when I made it clear that I don't want to. He never actually crosses the line in forcing me to do it but I still feel weirded out. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 3, 2015 - 84 answers

Are rebound relationships (and rebound sex) really often helpful?

Looking at the end of a significant LTR that's probably going to be crushing once I get over the shock. They say that the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. I have no experience with this. Is it really often true? (they also say that low-fat deserts and education debt are good for you). [more inside]
posted by wildblueyonder on Jul 19, 2015 - 16 answers

My 8 year relationship lacks passion... should we move on?

I am in my early 30s and have been in a loving relationship for over 8 years. We live together and our lives are very intermingled. But the passion is gone, and I am beginning to wonder whether we'd be better apart. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 10, 2015 - 16 answers

How do I deal with this intimate relationship with my ex?

Today is the 1 year anniversary of my divorce. The ex, our child, and I just spent the weekend with his extended family, visiting them in another state. We laughed, played darts, had a great time. We have been doing many things together (volunteering, gardening, walking, watching shows, going out) over the last month or so. Today he broke up with his girlfriend, because, among other reasons, he and I spend so much time together. But there is a problem. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 8, 2015 - 32 answers

a big ole bag of confusion, a possible engagement, and me

When faced with sexual confusion, mental health struggles, and a possible engagement, what is a guy to do? [more inside]
posted by MyBeautifulThrowaway on Jul 8, 2015 - 27 answers

How do I find out my boyfriend's secret desires?

I'm afraid of boring my boyfriend in bed. He's a decade older and has had quite a few relationships in his past. I can't imagine he's as vanilla as he professes to be--I'm willing to do ANYTHING, and he wants missionary every time. Does he view me as too innocent for anything else? [more inside]
posted by Guinevere on Jun 15, 2015 - 29 answers

My wonderful Mr. Right sucks in bed and I don't know how to tell him

I am in love with my wonderful boyfriend of 3 months. The only problem is that he doesn't seem to care that I am not having ANY orgasms with him, he's not into oral sex (the only thing that has worked for me in the past), he's not into foreplay, he barely kisses me, and he doesn't even realize that I'm unhappy because I am too wimpy and unassertive to voice a word of complaint. He's a very macho "alpha male" old-fashioned chivalrous type and I am afraid to emasculate him by giving him directions in the bedroom or telling him that I'm not satisfied. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 3, 2015 - 55 answers

How do I meet men now?

I'm a straight, overweight but otherwise generally considered attractive, woman in her early 40's. I got out of a LTR a year and a half ago. I am more than ready to date, but having major problems finding anyone interested :( [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 29, 2015 - 25 answers

How do I communicate better when I'm about to, erm, get my freak on?

Exactly as it says on the tin. How do, without faking it, I be more upfront about my dating/sexual inexperience with my potential partners, and when? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 10, 2015 - 21 answers

Big difference in age/experience on a first date and if something more.

So I am a 34 male and I knowingly asked a 19-20-21-ish-year-old on a coffee date. I mentioned the age difference to her when I did so. She said, "Sure." If we go on more dates after this date and/or become physically intimate, how can I minimize the chance that she will retrospectively feel preyed upon or taken advantage of in X years? [more inside]
posted by zeek321 on Apr 6, 2015 - 99 answers

Scared of attraction.

29 year old heterosexual male. I believe that I have social anxiety when it comes to talking to women I am attracted to - perhaps more than normal. This has meant very little sex or relationships throughout my life. Practical ideas for dealing with this would be appreciated. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 25, 2015 - 18 answers

I want to want you to want it (that way)

I am having trouble directing my kinky desires towards my long-term partner. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 8 answers

Post-coital repulsion

I use sex-related words in my question, so I've placed it in the extended area in case anyone is browsing at a prudish workplace. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 21, 2014 - 17 answers

How do I protect myself emotionally as a submissive?

I'm a bi female in my early 30s, just out of a decade long very vanilla relationship. I live in NYC and have been exploring my submissive side. Really enjoying it. Like, alot. I have never had better sex in my life and it is amazing. I am extremely submissive and I'm having a little bit of difficultly making sure I am emotionally safe. Because of the nature of my situation, I can't really talk to my usual family or friend connections when I need to vent. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 20, 2014 - 24 answers

Gettin' it on

How have you reconciled differing sex drives? [more inside]
posted by little beast on Nov 26, 2014 - 11 answers

Do sex drives ever INCREASE after 3+ years in a relationship?

My SO and I have been growing together more and more in the last three years. However, one thing seems to grow less and less, and as we move closer to thinking about marriage, I am a little concerned that our sex drives are mismatched for a very long term relationship. I am 23 and she is 21. I've heard a ton of anecdotes about women "waking up" sexually around 25. Is it realistic for me to think that that could be a possibility? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 25, 2014 - 33 answers

Halp! First experience with nonmonogamy

First non monogamous relationship. First serious post-marriage relationship. Lots of feelings. Need a navigator. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 6, 2014 - 39 answers

BDSMfilter: munches, play parties, and social anxiety

How can an shy, inexperienced kinkster approach potential play partners without being too pushy or creepy? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 14, 2014 - 5 answers

How do I know if I am in love "enough" with my partner?

How do I know if I am in love "enough" with my partner? Snowflakery to follow [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 30, 2014 - 26 answers

My sex drive plummeted after my BF moved in. WTF?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 1.5 years, and he recently moved into my duplex with me. Now that we're living together, I just don't feel sexy or like I'm wanting sexytimes. :( It's very distressing, and I'm not sure what to do. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Apr 5, 2014 - 8 answers

ain't 2 proud 2 beg

I have a wonderful relationship with my boyfriend. We are both mid-thirties; have discussed marriage and kids and are on the same page;we live together; and things are great. Except for one thing - I initiate sex most of the time and want it more. I know the next part is not right, but, me initiating things all of the time makes me feel bad. I know it is a stereotype to expect men to be wanting to have sex more. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 23, 2014 - 9 answers

What can I do about severe sexual incompatibility?

I have a high sex drive, my partner has a low sex drive. This incompatibility is making me depressed to the point that I feel like I can't stay in the relationship, despite everything else between us being really, really great. I don't know what my options are or what I can do to try and work with this. [more inside]
posted by Vrai on Feb 15, 2014 - 33 answers

Relationship Meetings: good idea or bad idea or terrible awful idea?

I have scheduled a relationship check-in with my long-term partner (a State of the Union, as per Pervocracy) only now I'm worried that it's just going to make things worse. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 5, 2014 - 30 answers

It's been a long, long time coming...

My relationship is great, with one small problem - no matter what my girlfriend and I try, I'm not having an orgasm. Oversharing details inside... [more inside]
posted by Ed The Sock on Jan 12, 2014 - 30 answers

“No woman gets an orgasm from shining the kitchen floor. ”

Met a great guy that I fell in love with just when I thought I never would again! Now how do I tell him I've never had an orgasm with him, that I want to do something about it, and that I was faking the ones I "did have" for the first half of our relationship? Sordid details inside! [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 10, 2014 - 17 answers

How To Talk About Sex

Occasionally, I bring up the subject of sex with my partner, and I always get nowhere. Sex has never been something that we've really talked about. We had those first few conversations when we met several years ago: disclosures of risks, general preferences, expectations for monogamy, etc. and from there we just let it develop naturally. We need to talk about it because our sex life isn't meeting my needs, and I've asked to talk about it, but I still don't know how to talk about it, and I'm afraid this is just going to become another in a string of failed attempts to talk about sex. [more inside]
posted by this *is* my happy face on Dec 19, 2013 - 28 answers

Why am I experiencing so many new sexual problems in my early 30's?

I've been dating my girlfriend for about two years and we've been living together (with her five year old son) for about four months. Over the last six months or so, I've had several new sexual problems that I've never experienced before. I ejaculate very quickly after penetration, my refractory period is so long that I'm basically "one and done," and my libido has decreased. I'm still very attracted to my girlfriend, and she can still turn me on, but I also have more days when I'd be perfectly happy to cuddle up and watch a movie instead of having sex, which is completely unlike how I felt a year or so ago. I'm not THAT old, and all the other parts of my relationship are going extremely well. Why am I experiencing these problems, and what can I do to solve them? [more inside]
posted by Chuck Barris on Dec 7, 2013 - 11 answers

Oral sex-iprocity?

My boyfriend has forgotten I exist in the bedroom. How can I go about initiating a chat about this and finding a solution before my sexual self-esteem completely disappears? (NSFW) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 21, 2013 - 20 answers

Past abuse and trying pegging, BDSM with the new boyfriend

The new boyfriend would like me to be more switch-y (and peg him, too) and I'd like to be able to provide that to him but past abuse makes me very adverse to causing people pain even if I know they'd enjoy it and also puts me off being the penetrative partner. How do I enjoy being the dominant/penetrative partner? I love it when the BF dominates me and causes me pain (a not-insane amount and he's always very respectful of my boundaries and comfort) so how can I become more comfortable reciprocating pain to him and how can I become comfortable with being the penetrative partner? [more inside]
posted by code_n_cakes on Oct 20, 2013 - 9 answers

We are "on a break". How long should it last?

My fiancee and I have been together for seven-and-a-half years, owned a house together for three, and in the spring of this year she agreed to marry me. Last week she told me, quite out of the blue, that she wanted a break from our relationship. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 18, 2013 - 40 answers

How can I revive my sex life with my girlfriend?

My girlfriend and I have lived together for about a year and a half. We're a solid couple, we love each other a lot and generally communicate well, but our formerly awesome sex life is just non-existent now. We've talked about it, but she's just withdrawn and apologetic whenever I try to initiate things. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 16, 2013 - 28 answers

Was I sexually violated?

Was I sexually violated? I keep obsessing about this, I don't know if the other parties care or have declared me a pariah [more inside]
posted by Jewel98 on Oct 6, 2013 - 42 answers

(NSFW) Easy sex positions for my wife and I

My wife can't spread her legs do to her disability. I can just about get my head between her legs with lots of stretching to eat her out but thats about it. [more inside]
posted by snow_mac on Sep 17, 2013 - 15 answers

When does a casual hookup turn into dating? When does it not?

I have been seeing this guy since December about once or twice a month, and am possibly on the verge of having feelings. Trying to figure out how to reasonably navigate this. Tell me about your experiences? [more inside]
posted by anonymoosemoosemoose on Aug 13, 2013 - 10 answers

Birth control options for sad ladies

New relationship, long history of depression, looking for birth control advice. [more inside]
posted by terretu on Aug 9, 2013 - 17 answers

How do I communicate what I want when I'm not even sure what that is?

Dating again. I guess. Is this dating? [more inside]
posted by hellameangirl on Aug 8, 2013 - 24 answers

What is it like to have sex for the first time? Advice?

As someone with Asperger's Syndrome and that doesn't socialize much, I know virtually nothing about relationships and sex, and I never really believed that I would experience either of those. But I have finally met someone I connect with and we both want to have sex! [more inside]
posted by 8LeggedFriend on Aug 4, 2013 - 20 answers

Getting back on the horse (I am the horse)

How to and should I date the emotionally wounded? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 13, 2013 - 38 answers

Want to enjoy sex but am turned off by myself

I don't have a low sex drive, but I rarely want to have sex. Or rather, I WANT to have sex but I don't want to be me while I'm doing it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 18, 2013 - 22 answers

Can you explain Swedish relationship /sex culture to an American?

As an American woman, I understand we have different expectations regarding sex and dating/new relationships than what generally happens in Sweden. My experiences with Swedish men have been a bit confusing, and I wonder if that may be part of a cultural communication disconnect. [more inside]
posted by zettoo on Jun 11, 2013 - 8 answers

Who originally thought of this dating-related experiment?

Write the numbers 1 to 20 on a set of cards, one per card but two cards of each number, put them on the foreheads of a group of twenty men and twenty women, and give them a couple minutes to try to pair up with the person of the opposite sex with the highest-ranked card: they will always end up with someone close to their own rank. Who originally thought of this? [more inside]
posted by renovatio1 on May 20, 2013 - 7 answers

Are most guys' minds creepy (or sex sex sex? :/)

Incident report of a young woman and much older upper-middle class man. [more inside]
posted by MiuMiu on May 10, 2013 - 85 answers

how do you get over your first "lover"

He was my first everything, and I can't get over him even months later. [more inside]
posted by wholecornandsalt on Apr 10, 2013 - 27 answers

Low sex drive and ED with new girlfriend

I dated a girl for 9 years, and we broke up last year. I now have a new girlfriend and we are both very much in love. However, my libido has all but disappeared and we are unable to have sex without great difficulty. I need advice on why this has happened and how I can address it. Thank you. [more inside]
posted by lichen on Apr 3, 2013 - 20 answers

Help me respond constructively to my brother!

My older brother (in his 50s) posted something on FB regarding the Steubenville rape case, which was: [more inside]
posted by HopperFan on Mar 17, 2013 - 52 answers

How to recover from ex-boyfriend who withheld sex?

Most recent relationship did a number on my self-confidence. Help me figure out how to regain what was lost. Details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 11, 2013 - 17 answers

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