Like many other on-again, off-again couples, my boyfriend and I are having problems answering the question, "how long have you been dating?" [more inside]
I recently came out of a disappointing "non-relationship" and am finding it hard to move on, and to know how to deal with this person (who is someone I see regularly). Hoping someone out there may have been through a similar thing and have some wisdom for me. [more inside]
Our relationship is mostly great, but we disagree about the appropriateness of expressing irritation and anger at your partner. She can be outbursty, and I can be over-sensitive, so we might bicker, and then fight about the fighting, and we're trying to break the cycle. [more inside]
I recently started seeing someone new, who happens to be the first person I've dated who's divorced. When he told me that he was divorced, he said they "grew apart," after over a decade of marriage, though he also indicated that his ex-wife didn't feel that way, and didn't want to get divorced. I had the sense (though this was a brief conversation, and we're just getting to know each other) that he didn't necessarily *try* to fix things. [more inside]
My SO has a tendency to ask a lot of mundane questions that make me feel defensive. Please help be less bothered by this. [more inside]
My wife is overworked, underslept, and stressed, and I wanted to know if anybody had any advice that might be helpful. She has a job that requires long hours and causes her a lot of stress that she is committed to until the end of the school year. On top of that, she has a job for a few hours every weekend that she is committed to for a while as well. We also have a two year old daughter and we are climbing out of debt. [more inside]
Can you have a trial separation while still both living in the same house? [more inside]
My partner lied to me about alcohol. Now what? [more inside]
I've always known that I want to find someone and fall in love and raise a family, the whole bit. That's my end-goal, no other ambition in my life is more important to me.. But I always freak out in relationships. I'm almost always the one moving things forwards, because I know what I want, but I get so anxious sometimes..
I'm currently dating someone who is actually perfect for me. He's like me in every way, I've never had better. I don't want to lose him, and I'm not planning on it, but I'm hoping to get advice as to how to stop "freaking out". [more inside]
My dad will be making his last child support payment to my mother next month for my brother who is 19 and no longer in full time education (he’s going to university). After then he will no longer financially support my brother - he hasn't financially supported me since I was 18 when he made his last support payment. I am now thinking of asking him directly to make a monthly payment to me and my brother since he isn’t supporting us in any other way. [more inside]
Is it okay to ever talk about relationship problems with your closest trusted friend(s) for advice or to vent? [more inside]
I've been struggling with depression and anxiety for years, and I'm tired of trying to struggle through it on my own. I've decided I need to get help, but I have no idea where to start. I'm gay and in Seattle. [more inside]
Moving on from an old crush... [more inside]
I have a really hard time relaxing in life and sharing myself with others. It's making me miserable. How can I overcome this? [more inside]
At a dinner party at our home a few years ago one of our guests brought up issues of life insurance and their concerns about adequate coverage for their family. They asked my husband and I how we manage our policies. My husband announced to the group that he refuses to get life insurance because he feels such a policy would prompt me to actively seek ways to end his life. He was serious. This has caused no small amount of angst on my part, and I need some advice. [more inside]
How should I handle my hunch that my boyfriend was abused as a child -- when I am unsure about the future of our relationship in general? [more inside]
I'm a member of the Board of Directors for a chorus; I'm also the librarian for the chorus. I'd like to withdraw from both positions by the end of the year (i.e., the choral year, meaning by May 2015), but I suspect it will be tricky to do without causing a fair amount of consternation. I'm looking for advice on the best way to go about it. [more inside]
After a turbulent period in my marriage, I'm taking a few days out for myself. Thing is, I don't know exactly what to do in those few days, or how best to work on things in my marriage whilst I'm away. [more inside]
After years I finally did a re-haul/update of my OkCupid profile. If you enjoy this sort of thing, please help me with your wisdom. My profile
. [more inside]
I am in my late 30s. My boyfriend is in his early 40s. We have been together for just over a year. He is attractive, gentle, smart and sensitive. We have talked about having a kid. Unfortunately we fight every other day. [more inside]
I did something I feel really bad about, it does not sound like much, but I feel terrible. [more inside]
Should I take the leap, and take the risk, or should I just forget about it and move on? [more inside]
I'm curious to hear how everyone organizes their Facebook friends lists, and how they figure out which posts/content to disclose to which parties. How do you use your lists? What is your system? [more inside]
I'm a college junior who has had trouble making many friends, help? [more inside]
Is this a stupid question? Idk. I just got out of a 5 year relationship in May. I feel moved on from him but I'm still trying to put my life back together. And I don't want a relationship right now, bBut two guys have recently asked me out on dates. Idk what to say! I don't know very much about dating. I am 21. [more inside]
Whew. Just put up my OKC profile for the first time ever! Looking for advice and some pointers. [more inside]
When one half of you is taken how does this affect the plans you can make together? [more inside]
How do I conquer my longtime addiction to relationships, but... also date in Brooklyn? [more inside]
Folks in your thirties and forties, especially ones that are married or in committed relationships - how have you built or maintained communities and social support networks outside your family? Especially if you have kids? How would you recommend that one build a good foundation for this earlier in life or if you wish you had (particularly following a significant life event like a divorce). I am going through a break-up and facing these questions right now in my earlier thirites, and wondering how I can better prepare myself if this happens in the future. [more inside]
My sister made a careless remark about a coworker being "too old" to have children that really offended my girlfriend. Ever since, my girlfriend has been making snarky remarks about my sister whenever I mention anything about my immediate family. My sister has no idea that my girlfriend feels this way. Can I do anything to change how my girlfriend feels about this situation, and should I even try? [more inside]
I just found out that my boyfriend, who has narcolepsy, also has AD/HD. Many of our problems make so much sense now, and I'm kind of at a crossroads. Do I have what it takes to lead a happy relationship with this very, very dear person? Will I get used to the sacrifices and compromises I have to make? [more inside]
My boyfriend and I both hate making each other feel bad. Does this mean we can't talk about things that aren't going well? He in particular feels very hurt when I bring up things that are bothering me. [more inside]
I've been with my boyfriend for a little over two years. We've had a good, happy, supportive, and very loving relationship with very few bumps in the road.
He has a tendency to get irritated more easily than I, which usually diffuses rather quickly by him realizing he's overreacting. On occasion I've said to him "oh come on, its not that big of deal" when he is overreacting and it diffuses. So nothing outside of the norm. My temperament is on the extreme end of laid back, while his is closer to the high strung end. [more inside]
I haven't been feeling so confident lately. I know my SO could also be much happier if she felt a bit more confident. When we first met around 3 years ago, we were both extremely confident. Now we seem to have trouble being decisive, making decisions to better ourselves/get necessary things done, and choosing a restaurant or a date idea gets harder and harder. I would love ideas of things that could help with this. [more inside]
Is there a way to be opinionated without being obnoxious? What are the dos and dont's? [more inside]
I need advice on how to explain to my partner why I wont be attending a birthday party for the child she co-parents with her emotionally abusive ex. [more inside]
Does anyone know of an app (or apps) that block you from looking at a particular Facebook page, or a particular Instagram feed? I've heard of Break-up Apps that recently have come about where you can 'erase' someone's photos, tags, etc. from your Facebook, as if they were never there, and I also know of chrome extensions which block you from a site altogether, but I can't find a good app that blocks only a particular PAGE on the site (i.e. www.facebook.com/ex'susername).
I would like to be able to continue being 'Facebook Friends' with an ex, as not doing so will be disruptive. I also need to use Facebook for my job. I've already blocked them from appearing on my newsfeed and in chat, but I can't seem to stop myself from, fairly regularly, checking their Facebook page, or their Instagram feed.
Any good solutions you've seen online? If not, I may have to team up with a programmer to create one because I think it'd be a very useful service! I sure could use it ASAP.
I need tips on ridding myself of new-relationship anxiety, releasing the need to control and the need to know where it's going, and allowing the relationship to unfold naturally. [more inside]
Your 2000th snowflakey question on the how to be an emotionally healthy single person. How can I live for myself and grow my social networks instead of seeking validation from my abstract idea of a desirable partner? Navel-gazing after the jump. [more inside]
Should I put my reading three-year-old in a (pre)school for bright kids? Should I move in with my partner in order to do so? [more inside]
Does Twitter or Facebook provide any mapping like this, or is there an app that can, through access to a TW or FB account, create this kind of map?
I’d like to get some outside opinions on managing the probable end of a friendship with a formerly very close friend, without (any more) melodrama or middle-school emotional antics. I will definitely see her at a mutual friend’s birthday in a couple of months, and I may see her infrequently (e.g. a few times a year) on an ongoing basis. [more inside]
Am I ruining a great relationship with my anxiety or am I anxious because my relationship is not great? Is there a way to tell the difference between irrational anxiety and alarm bells? [more inside]
A common theme on AskMeFi is that a person should be able to take care of themselves first before they can be ready to establish and maintain a healthy relationship. What if the relationship itself is the driver of positive personal growth? And what if that process has been kind of painful so far? [more inside]
How can an shy, inexperienced kinkster approach potential play partners without being too pushy or creepy? [more inside]
I'm inept at dating in the real world. Help me learn how to take a girl from acquaintance to date and face the uncertainty in between. [more inside]
I'm 24, a year after graduation I'm still in the town where I went to university. I'm living with my partner Jake who has a five-year-old son. Jake and I are very happy together and I've become good friends with the mother of his son, Kaitlyn. We all get along really well now, life is easy, drama-free and steadily improving. The problem is, Kaitlyn, Jake and I are all really keen on adding to our crazy little family by me having a baby. I would love to do that, but on the other hand, I have family, friends and a small part of me shouting NO!!!! You're too young! Go travel the world!
How do I reconcile what I want to do RIGHT NOW, what I think I should do to avoid having regrets later and what everyone else wants me to do? [more inside]
I'm looking to make a career shift to a new city and move to a slightly different area of my professional field. A while back, I met a great contact ("Bob") here in my current city who has a giant professional network both here and in the city where I'd like to relocate. He has been very helpful and recently put me into contact with one of his "best friends" ("Jane"), who he ensured me would have valuable insights into the job market in my target city. I arranged a brief phone call with Jane, and it went horribly. Jane was rude, condescending, and made it clear she was talking to me only as a favor to Bob. Now Bob excitedly wants a readout of the conversation, with details of how Jane was able to help me. Should I tell him the truth about our conversation or just be vague and said it went fine? [more inside]
How long should one wait before indirectly notifying a recent ex via social media that they are in a new relationship? Is this even a thing? [more inside]
I've decided to end my relationship with my boyfriend/fiance of nearly 6 years. We have a 3 year old. I've realized I would rather be single/co-parenting than have my child see such an unhappy relationship. My boyfriend is regularly verbally/emotionally abusive to me in front of our child, and has a history of being emotionally withdrawn. For the purpose of this question please assume that we are definitely breaking up and that there is no other option for me. [more inside]