Ask MetaFilter questions tagged with NSFW

Need ideas for a NSFW Halloween costume!

Anonymous — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 12:10:01 -0800

Need ideas for a NSFW Halloween costume! Posting this as anon because, well, the idea of this question forever being connected with my user name gives me pause :)

Halloween is coming up, and I need some costume ideas! The unofficial theme for the party I am going to is basically tasteful nudity. (By way of example, one of my friends is going to wear footie pajamas with the butt flap hanging open.)

I am totally at a loss as to what I am going to wear, so I turn to the creative hive mind once again. Some broad guidelines to hopefully help narrow the suggestions down:

- The party is gay / gay-friendly, with about an even split of men and women
- I am a guy, am gay, and 28
- I am at least a little demure, so let's avoid costumes that require full front nudity - everything else is fine
- It's going to be a long night, so it would be best if the costume was not too bulky, cumbersome, etc.
- Arts & crafts is not my strong specialty, so the simpler the better

Look forward to your ideas, MeFi!

You guys are so good at doing this with movies and childrens' books...

Jonathan Harford — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 20:08:59 -0800

My friend (no, really!) is hoping to somehow find the green-headbanded porn film that imprinted on his 14-year-old brain in the mid-90s. [NSFW, natch] "Looked very eighties, I seem to remember the woman looked kind of like Linda Hamilton (circa Terminator 1). She was wearing a drab green or olive green headband across her forehead, eighties style. It was just her and some guy. They did anal, along with everything else. The year it was watched, on VHS tape, was 1993. Possibly a darkish room with just a bed and no furnishings. Caucasian woman with light brown or possibly blond hair. Pubes were not alarmingly overgrown by 14 yo boy standards."

Are we fishing for a needle in a haystack?

Whats this films name?

rus — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 06:46:33 -0800

Name that film. A black comedy (I think it was from memory) with a pedophile father (NSFW) I'm trying to remember the title of a film M I saw randomly channel surfing. There was a father who became attracted to his sons friend and ended up drugging him. There is a subplot with his son trying to ejeculate and in the end he does but a dog licks it up...

I know written down it sounds like a bad film. IMDB plot search and google haven't chucked up anything obvious

Itchily in love

teraspawn — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 03:52:50 -0800

Is there any sensible way to remove semen from one's vagina after intercourse? (nsfw) Some background: I am on the pill, my partner and I have both had recent clear STI tests, this question is not about contraception and YANA/MD.

We're in a LDR at the moment and only get to see each other for the odd weekend when we have time off work. Naturally in that time we have absurd amounts of sex. Besides the inevitable back pain, bruising, abrasions and dehydration afterwards (heh), I always seem to end up with a yeast infection.

It stands to reason that a sticky, alkaline, sugary substance coating the walls of my vagina, plus frequent, vigorous aeration would encourage dear ol' Candida albicans, and some googling seems to back that up.

Now, I'd rather live with the yeast infections than go back to condoms, but is there some way I could just clear the stuff out after we've done the deed? All I've heard about vaginal douching is that it is a Bad Thing and encourages and spreads all sorts of nasty infections, so I'm guessing that's not the way? Is there another solution?

My wife had cybersex with someone else. What should I do?

Anonymous — Sat, 30 May 2009 09:43:41 -0800

My wife had cybersex with someone else. What should I do? Unbeknownst to me, my wife has been having cybersex with random people on Yoville, an avatar-driven chat room thing. I don't have a Yoville account, nor do I want one. I don't feel like I have the time. She and I have been married for about three years. We have two little kids, both of whom take up the rest of my time when I am not at work. She stays home during the day and goes to community college a couple nights a week. She complains about not having a social life and goes out three or four times a month with girl friends to eat, see movies, go to shows. She says that I don't take her out enough. When I do take her out, it's not good enough. A couple days later she will complain about something I said or didn't say during the date. A couple days after that she will start asking to go out again and saying we never go out.

Things have actually been good between us lately. We had a rough patch through the winter and seemed to have survived it together for the better. About a week ago she bought some weed from a classmate. Last weekend she told me she was smoking weed late at night. Tuesday night she went out with a friend to see a movie after I got home from work. She came home at 11 and turned on the TV. I asked her to come to bed. She said she wasn't tired and slept on the couch. Wednesday morning I found a log on our computer of her Yoville chats. She has been inviting men into locked rooms and masturbating with them.

I was surprised. My wife is a very jealous person. If I don't come straight home from work she accuses me of f-ing someone else. If I'm unhappy with something she has done and I am critical of her she accuses me of f-ing someone else. If she calls me and I let it go to voicemail she accuses me of f-ing someone else.

She is obsessed with infidelity. Her ex-boyfriend apparently cheated on her and for doing so deserves to burn in hell. Her father cheated on her mother and caused them to be divorced. Early in our marriage, my wife told me she would kill me if there was someone else besides her. This was on a night when I was working late, or took too long at the grocery store, I can't remember.

On our son's first birthday, I went to the store to pick up his cake. I bought some picnic chairs and charcoal while I was there. It took about an hour. She accused me of seeing someone else.

We went to marriage counseling for a while and one of the things I complained about was constantly being accused of cheating. It is not normal. I have not ever cheated on her. Her dad told me that her mother did the same thing to him, for seventeen years, accused him of cheating on her. Then he did.

I have no desire to cheat on my wife. One wife, one woman and all of the struggle and problems that go along with a relationship are enough for me.

If we didn't have kids, things would be different. Clearly. But this is not a thought experiment. This is real life. What I think is best for the kids and her and me is that we find a way to stay together and take care of each other as best we can. I would rather make this work than see each of us live broken for the rest of our lives.

I see people with young children who live apart angry at each other. It looks like an awful alternative to the struggling, little family we have now.

So, things have been going well and for the last couple months my wife hasn't been accusing me, as much, of cheating on her.

Wednesday morning as I'm on my way out the door, wondering why she didn't sleep in the bed with me, I check the computer to see if she was up late screwing around on the internet. The browsing history in Safari was gone. She knows how to use the Private Browsing feature. Instead of doing that, she used Clear History.

She hadn't covered all of her tracks. I could see that she was, again, searching for her ex-boyfriend. She had done the same thing a couple months ago. I asked her about it and she first lied, then apologized. This, by her own admission, was a mistake; a violation of her own moral code.

Being the moral relativist that I am, I can only hope that each person holds themselves accountable for the mistakes they have made, as they define them. As I find someone whose sense of right and wrong agrees with mine, I begin to trust that person.

I don't know that searching for your ex-boyfriend on myspace is axiomatically right or wrong, or neither. It's probably neither. But in my wife's mind, it is wrong. She knows it and she tried to cover her tracks after doing it, again.

I can't even use myspace because my wife scours the pages of my friends and gets angry with me if another female has pictures of me on their page. Our first fight was about pictures of me on someone else's myspace page. Pictures that were taken and posted long before she had even met me. She harassed my friend until she deleted the pictures. These were pictures of me and her with arms around each other's shoulders. Harmless stuff, I thought. She didn't agree. I quit using myspace.

I look a little more deeply in the history on our computer and I am shocked. Chat logs of her talking about sex on Yoville with random men. It was like that scene in a movie where the horizontal and the vertical sway back and forth and blur. I couldn't believe it. Here she is asleep in our house and I'm in the kitchen reading what she was writing that night she stayed up smoking weed. Asking some guy if he likes oral sex.

I keep reading. The log goes back for months. Beginning at the end of March onward, on multiple occasions, she had cybersex with random men. The meetings appeared random, but she would maintain cyber contact with them. One guy stopped responding, but she would leave notes on his cyber door asking him how he was doing.

This situation is so unique and bizarre to me, I have no idea what to do. No background experience to draw upon for guidance. No one I know to whom I feel I can turn for advice. It's embarrassing for me, and in the context of our lives together, just plain weird.

That being said, these trysts seem to have remained online and not progressed into IRL affairs. But I don't know. The sight of what I have seen has spread uncertainty throughout my mind as I think about my relationship with my wife. If this is possible, what isn't?

Wednesday night she came home high and drunk from school and started badgering me about why I was being so quiet. She knows something is wrong. I have not told her what I found. I have been a bit withdrawn for a couple days.

Please help me understand this situation and advise me as to what best I should do.

Safe lubricants?

zeek321 — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 03:13:45 -0800

Natural, safe lubricant? NSFW It seems like the latest trend in lubricants (whether for anal sex or otherwise) is to minimize the number of chemical-sounding ingredients (yes, I know everything is a "chemical") and then add one really nasty preservative. I really don't like the idea of certain things drying out on skin and sitting inside moist, mucous-membrane lined orifices for hours. Case in point, though not to single out this brand:

http://store.babeland.com/safe-sex-lubes/sliquid-sassy-anal-lube

Polyquat whatever, fine, but this:

http://www.cosmeticsdatabase.com/ingredient.php?ingred06=702196&nothanks=1

Seriously? I'm not sure I care that it's the last ingredient and probably an infinitesimal amount.

I've tried:
http://www.yesyesyes.org/
http://www.fireflyorganics.com/

These meet my safety criteria, but, not surprisingly, they don't have the consistency of the more synthetic lubes. What I really want is an astroglide made of sunbeams and rainbows.

So, is there anyone out there as paranoid as me that has found a water-based lube that's reasonable in terms of both safety and performance for vaginal intercourse and anal sex?

Gee, you'd think this would be a cinch ;-)

sandra_s — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 14:18:30 -0800

Philadelphia or PA 'Burbs - Lingerie or costume shops or anywhere that I can get a plain red corset or bustier. (answers might get NSFW) I'm looking for other costuming of the adult variety as well, so related shops would be appreciated as well, but my primary focus this week will be for the corset/bustier.

I'm looking for something very plain, minimal lace or designs. Can be any material (satin, vinyl, leather...) Lace or zipper in the back.

Of course I could find one online, but I'd like to try it on and purchase it.

Thanks in advance!

What else could I have said in this situation? (NSFW)

Anonymous — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 09:56:15 -0800

What else could I have said in this situation? (NSFW) When I met my girlfriend (Diane), she was a virgin. She was waiting for marriage. For the first couple months of the relationship, we would fool around up to the point of sex but never go that far - or even tease the boundary. Our point of view was that we didn't want to risk temptation. The boundary began to get teased before long.

We would do the whole, "just put it in a little bit" routine. I would pull out, or she would get up before anything happened (read: breaking the hymen).

Some time last month, we were getting intimate and it got to the "put it in" part. I was about to pull out, but she told me to go deeper. I did, and it broke.

There was a moment of silence and shock. Then questioning ("Did it really break?" "Yep, there's blood."). Now, as a male, I'm not known for being smart. The first word out of my mouth was, "Oops."

We had sex for a few more minutes after that before stopping because of no condom.

Diane isn't crushed because of losing her virginity before she was ready. Nor does she hold any resentment against me. Surprisingly, she doesn't even hold the "Oops" against me - It's actually a point of chuckle for us.

Tonight, we were playfully bickering and she brought it up saying, "I mean, seriously: 'Oops'?!"

To which I responded, "Well, what else could I have said?" And there was silence.

AskMeFi: What else could I have said? We've played around with the "I love you" line, but that could possibly have made it seem like I planned to take her virginity.

Request: I'm not looking for any answers besides ones pertaining directly to my question. We just want to know if there was anything else that could have been said in this instance better than, "Oops" that wouldn't have ruined the mood, nor made it seem like I planned the whole thing.

Penis Envy, My Ass: the photo

cheapskatebay — Sun, 11 Jan 2009 13:26:48 -0800

Please help me figure out how to contact a particular photographer to obtain duplicate images of a photo. NSFW We have a photo in our house that hangs over one of our toilets. It looks like this (image is NSFW):

NSFW link

The title is self-explanatory. It seems equally clear that the photographer's name is Marilyn Lee. (Perhaps she is the subject as well?)

My wife had this image on laminated newsprint when we were in college in North Carolina the early to mid-90s. It's possible, even probable, that the original print came from a newsweekly in Memphis, where she grew up. I seem to recall the original image being a "centerfold" of some sort - I think it was a numbered image that was presumably one of a series of such numbered images that appeared in the center of this local newspaper. Somewhere along the line we acquired a nice photo of the image, which we've framed, and we discarded her original laminated newsprint copy.

A large number of our female friends and relatives think this is a cool photo, and I'd like to be able to contact the photographer to obtain duplicates to give as gifts. (If anyone else can find the image without going through the photographer, that's fine, too!) I'd think this would be straightforward but my Google-fu has failed me.

Thanks!

Is "humhide.com" what it sounds like?

Anonymous — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 07:58:35 -0800

My fifteen-year-old niece has a notice from a friend that she has been posted on the internet in a potentially dangerous way. More inside, potentially NSFW. The site her picture or video has been posted to is called "humhide.com" My sister and I have tried to find out what the website is about, but do not want to give it the information it demands for us to proceed. Does anyone out in the hive know anything about this website? She is emotionally very vulnerable and most definitely below the age of consent.
Thanks all.

My boyfriend, the secret photographer

Anonymous — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 06:03:26 -0800

Discovered my boyfriend has been secretly (occasionally) photographing naked models going back for years. I confronted, he came clean. Why am I still upset? (poss NSFW) (Apologies for the length, it turns out I'm another of those self-obsessed people who posts reams in relationship questions.)

Well, I guess I deserved the shock I got when I was poking around on his computer. (I know, shame on me, I have told him and apologised for this.) I found several folders of photos documenting photo sessions lasting 1 or 2 hours with scantily clad, topless or naked women. I did not find very many sessions (about half a dozen) but the dates went back to four years ago, a year after we started dating.

It was obviously his photography: these sessions seemed to mostly take place at his parents' house, which he visits as a base for 1-day business trips in his home town every fortnight. Two recent sessions were in our new house which we moved into in August. The photos were at first taken with his camera, then with my (better) camera which he borrowed. Most of the photos were just poses of the women in various states of undress (occasionally fully clothed), in different rooms etc. Some were very explicit, eg. shots of one naked woman eating half a strawberry then dribbling the juice over her (close-up) vagina. There is no suggestion of any kind of sexual contact with the women, nor do I believe this to be true.

We have been together for five years, since I was 18, and have lived together for three. We are a close couple and spend most of our time together. This is compounded by the fact that neither of us are very outgoing and we don't have much of a social network. We spend a lot of weekends at home together. He probably has more close friends than I do, but pretty much 100% of them are online-only friends. He works from home as well, so doesn't have any workmates either. I know this is sometimes frustrating for him and he'd like to have more contact with people.

I was quite shocked when I first found the photos - partly because of the subject matter, but the real punch to the gut was that he had kept this completely from me, for years, and I never suspected anything. I don't want to be the nagging girlfriend who lays down the law and stops him from doing the few things he wants to do. I also feel guilty for his lack of social network because he hasn't been very happy since moving away from his home town, and somewhat blames me for dragging him away from there (first for university, then for my work). He has his own internet business which is fairly easy to run from whatever location, but 90% of his clients are still in his home town (2.5 hours away) and he hasn't found any local ones.

I tried to sort out how I felt and concluded that it wasn't the subject matter but the secrecy that bothered me. (Btw, I also found some porn on his computer that I didn't know about. Don't care.) When he came home I gently confronted him. He seemed quite unruffled (not the reaction I was expecting) and explained that he's always had an interest in that kind of thing, but has always kept it quite discreet because of not wanting it to intrude at all on his professional life. He said that it was a weird thing to bring up when we first started dating (and it would have been, with me having been quite a naive 18 year old) and then the longer he left it the weirder it would have seemed to bring it up. I get that. He also said that he's used to compartmentalising his life, and that with us living "on top of each other" a lot of the time he kind of liked having some part of his life that he didn't have to share, that he had control over, and that everybody didn't know about.

He also said he assumed I wouldn't be bothered by the subject matter because we both have fairly liberal attitudes when it comes to sex, and that I probably recognised that there's a professional boundary in photography, ie. thinking of the subject as an artistic object rather than a naked woman in front of you. He explained that he knows these models from an online photography network he frequents. Some of them are paid, some of them do it for fun.

He agreed, after I asked, that in future he would tell me about it whenever he does this, and that if it did bother me that it would be no great loss to stop doing it. I told him it was okay as long as I know about it, but now I'm not sure if it is.

Right now I feel deeply weirded out, but that it's my problem and I'll get over it. The thing is that the more I reflect on it the more uncomfortable and prudish I feel. I dislike the fact that my boyfriend has been interacting at all with (half-)naked women while he or I am away, even though intellectually I think he's separated it in his mind from thoughts of me, and it's not a sexual situation for him. I am getting all insecure over whether he would prefer it if I looked like they do. I feel that this isn't a big deal for him, and therefore it shouldn't be for me either.

So how much am I obsessing? (Quite a lot, given the length of this post.) Does this have any larger implications for our relationship, or how he thinks of me? Am I being irrational? How much upset is justified, and how much due to the sheltered world I live in (which I therefore should get over)?

Throwaway email: boyfriend.secret.photographer@googlemail.com

Sexual without sex?

zeek321 — Sat, 04 Oct 2008 18:13:56 -0800

How do I healthily express and engage my sexuality without dating or casual encounters? (nsfw) [28 straight male, if it matters]

After taking careful stock of my relationships (and the time between relationships) over the past nine years, I've concluded that I am significantly and consistently happier, emotionally healthier, and more engaged in my life... when I'm single.

So, temporarily, no more dating, relationship seeking, or casually hooking up while I take some extended time off to figure this out.

Here's the problem, though: If I go too long without being in a relationship, I get... weird.

At its most innocuous, I start to mindlessly surf porn, facebook, okcupid, etc., way too much. At worst, my behavior, my goals, my thoughts, how I spend my time all gets subtly subverted in service of subliminal drives. I get sort of grid-locked because bodymind says one thing and ostensibly conscious mind is going in another direction. In any case, when I catch myself in this pattern, I take conscious control, I stop the facebook surfing, go out and meet a nice person fairly quickly, and it's all good...

But now I can't, or I won't, go out and meet someone, for now.

So, how can I healthily express, engage, and fulfill my sexuality without dating or casual hookups? Whether voluntarily or involuntarily not dating, what the heck do people do?

Obviously, masterbation (and porn). Of course. That's a part of my sexuality, even in a relationship, but it's only a part.

I've been doing a bit of personal erotic writing. (Exactly what I needed to read? Just for me? Why thank you.) I may do a bit more of that. It's been great, but it's also been exhausting. I already have to write a lot for school and other things, and I can only write so much. Just like mental fantasies, it's good, but it doesn't quite scratch the itch and completely fulfill all the time.

A "platonic" relationship seemed like a possibility, at first, because I think it would remove some of the emotional drain, but I think it would become hypocritical, repressed, and denial-based pretty quick, not to mention a likely huge letdown in the end (i.e., incompatible chemistry when you finally get close enough to feel it).

The first thing that came to mind was signing up for a decent porn pay site, say, abbywinters.com, which I've done before, instead of poking around aimlessly on the internet or settling for youporn or something. All things being equal, that was nice for awhile (though it didn't come close to turning all the knobs and dials of kink, fetish, meh, whatever you want to call it). But, I've generally had the grounding, reality-based influence of another real-live human being around, who sometimes even shared in the internet fun. Or, if single at the time, it was very consciously temporary, because I didn't want to get stuck in weird, antisocial-land. Anyway, does anything of have thoughts about this, specifically? (This was the initial impetus of my Ask MeFi question, actually: Healthy or not healthy to sign up for a less-exploitative-and-creepy-than-the-norm paysite?)

If the advice is, just ignore sex and it'll calm down, I think that would be a really bad idea. In my experience, after months, it never calms down. It's healthy. It's a part of me. It demands to be expressed (hopefully constructively).

If the advice is, deal with this inside a relationship, yeah, I've tried for years. Time for a break.

So, in summary, for a variety of reasons, intimate-romantic-sexual-relationships are a huge drain on me, and I need to take a huge step back, and a long break to sort that out, and I need to take care of myself in the meantime. It's such a relief to have figured this out and to be able to put my foot down and take a break and bask in my life and chill for a while. But, this is emphatically a temporary situation. I adore being sexual *with other people,* obviously, holy crap, like, to die for, and I'm a soppy, hopeless romantic under my cynicism.

How can I approach this without getting all weird (it's already happening, hence this question), and undermining myself, and giving up too soon, even though it'll make me unhappy? (I'm very content right now, minus this issue.)

Why does my hip ache when I...

mgrichmond — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 23:40:28 -0800

Kind of an odd sexual question (nothing too dirty but since it's sex-related, mark this NSFW)... For as long as I've been having orgasms (pretty much since I started self-experimenting in my youth), my orgasms are accompanied by a sharp pain in my right hip. I'm not complaining; it actually enhances the experience. But I've always wondered what causes it, and I've never heard of anyone else who has this happen.

Has anyone here ever heard of this? Can you help settle a lifetime of confusion?

Question about erection angles

Anonymous — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 05:38:00 -0800

I have a NSFW, but nevertheless clinical and sober, question about erection angles (question follows). I've long wondered about this, but it just now occurred to me to ask in here. Most of the penises I've seen (through straight porn) are sort of perpendicular to the body when erect. Sometimes there's a slight variation in the up or down direction, but not by much. In addition to this, many seem to have a very "flexible" base, allowing the erect penis to point in whatever direction might be appropriate at the time.

Now... mine's always gone straight *up*. Parallel with the body; staring me in the face, if you will. The base is very stiff, and doesn't permit me to bend much farther than about 30 degrees from my stomach.

This is just fine for missionary positions, but there are lots of options that it prohibits -- I can't do doggy-style, cowgirl, or basically anything else that requires that the penis be perpendicular to the body.

I guess my questions are...

1. How common is this? What's the average angle?

2. Are there any... solutions? What do others do in this situation?

I imagine a surgical operation might work, but it seems unlikely that it'd be worth the trouble. Is there any sort of stretching that might work?

I've never had any complaints, but it seems unfortunate to be limited in this way.

Help ID this bizarre cable movie

mgrichmond — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 16:51:03 -0800

Trying to ID a bizarre movie I saw the end of on Cinemax, many moons ago. (description is incredibly NSFW) So, I caught the end of a movie late one night around 1996 or 1997 while channel-surfing. I'm pretty sure it was on Cinemax, but it may have been Showtime.

The movie appeared to have been shot on video and treated with a film-look process. The protagonist was a thinnish man, wearing a dark suit with an open collar, and a leather bondage mask. He was breaking into some sort of warehouse-type space (a typical low-budget villain hideout) in search of his sister.

Armed with a gun and a sword, he fought his way past several sword-wielding thugs, until he found his sister. This is where it gets seriously NSFW:

The sister was topless with typically large breasts, and with a bridal veil covering her face. She was standing with her hands bound over her head, on a rotating platform. Our bondage-masked hero fought the main villain, eventually decapitating him, sending an exaggerated geyser of blood flying everywhere.

Somehow, the hero discovered that the sister was already dead, and trudged off sadly. The final shot was the rotating platform coming to a stop, showing us the dead sister, her face and breasts covered in the villain's blood.

I don't *think* I hallucinated this, but I have no idea how I would go about looking this up. Yes, I know 11 or 12 years is a long time to wait, but it's been nagging at my mind lately. Does anyone have any idea what (the hell) this movie was?

I think I'm straight. Now what?

Anonymous — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 11:33:23 -0800

After a long time in a lesbian relationship, I'm coming to the realization that I think I'm straight. I don't want to leave my wife (I really love her), but I can't stop thinking about men. Please help me figure this out. Sexually explicit details inside. NSFW When I met the woman who I ended up marrying, I had never thought about sexuality. I had had a very few relationships with men, but was very young. When she told me she was interested in me I thought I could give it a try, fell in love with her, and started identifying as bisexual.

At first the sex was awful (we were both inexperienced and had no idea how to have sex, never mind lesbian sex), but it got better. Over time, though, I found that I had the best orgasms when I fantasized about men during sex. It took a long time for me to tell her this, but I did, and she was fine with it. Eventually it came to be that I could only orgasm when I fantasize about men. She knows this too, and it doesn't bother or worry her at all.

It bothers and worries me. I feel like I'm not having sex with her, rather, I'm masturbating with a hands-free vibrator. I've tried not fantasizing, I've tried keeping my eyes open so that I can see her, and all it does is keep me from coming, make me frustrated, and tire out her arm.

Thinking about this, I've realized several things: I have never really checked out other women in a sexual way. I see a sexy woman and I think "I'd like to look like her" rather than "I'm sexually attracted to her." I look at men, though. The only times I've ever fantasized about women are in fantasies where men are watching me have sex with a woman, and still, the fun only starts when the man/men join in. All of my porn is straight porn, or else it pictures just one woman, and I always identify with the woman and not with the person off-scene who is playing with her.

Recently, my wife and I have pretty much stopped having sex. I know this is partly just a function of being in a ltr, but I feel more and more like we are best friends who happen to share a bed, rather than romantic partners. We've bought toys, we've watched porn, we've tried a bit of kink, but nothing seems to be bringing back the spark. I'm horny, but just don't want to have sex with her. She has said the same, but has said that I'm seeming colder and colder.

I love her so much. She is my world and my light and my heart. She takes care of me, makes me feel beautiful, makes me feel special, makes me want to be a good person. She's my best friend, my confidante, and I trust her implicitly.

Still, I fantasize about a stubbly chin nuzzling against my neck. I dream of being the shorter one in a hug. Of pressing my face against a flat chest, wrapping my arms around narrow hips. I think about sex with a man. A lot. Not any particular man, just a man.

Am I straight? How can I know if I'm straight as opposed to bisexual? Am I just stuck in a monogamy rut? Can I fix myself for this relationship or am I fucked? Am I going to come to a realization ten years down the road and leave my wife for a man, like so many of my older lesbian friends did in reverse? How can I prevent that from happening?

Russian narcotics terminology.

Anonymous — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 14:59:17 -0800

Russian narcotics terminology translation help, please. NSFW. My Russian-speaking teenage students burst out laughing today at the mention of the word "burka" during a discussion on religious minorities.

With lots of prodding and assurances that I wouldn't call their parents, they told me the word was the same as the Russian for something to do with marijuana.

They then attempted to describe various parts of a bong or pipe, I think, but I wasn't really sure. They were certain that this was something only used when smoking marijuana rather than some other substance, but I'm not at all familiar with any kind of smoking apparatus, and while I've been to the Russian Wikipedia page linked from the English "Bong" article, I can't seem to find this word with a "find in this page" hunt for all the words starting with the Cyrillic letters "в" and "б", which make a /v/ and /b/ sound, respectively. A search on Google for "бурка", which is my closest guess at transliterating the word exactly, didn't seem to bring up anything relevant.

Might a word starting with some other letter be making the sound at the beginning of this mystery word? Or is this not related to a bong, but to some other way of inhaling marijuana smoke?

Anonymous because I like my job.

NSFWFilter: Adult banner ad service?

Anonymous — Tue, 30 Oct 2007 18:37:54 -0800

Amongst my many other web properties, I run a small blog with pictures of pretty naked people, and I'm looking to ad some nonintrusive banners to the design. Does anyone have any experience with the various providers of such services? Which are reputable, which are not? For context, I would use google adsense if they didn't have an issue with NSFW sites. Not looking for obnoxious popunderjavascript crapola, as this is not my main source of revenue.

Is Annie Stoner Fake?

captainscared — Sun, 09 Sep 2007 14:02:51 -0800

(LINKS NSFW) I came across these images of Annie Stoner while searching Flickr's iphone wallpaper group. People seem to rave about her body but to me it looks absurdly fake. A cut and paste job for sure. Here's her home page. and another example of what I'm talking about. Am I wrong about this? Have I gone insane? Am I so old that I don't know a real woman when I see one? Help me make the world go the right way. (ALL IMAGES NSFW)

Why is she holding a leek?

Skorgu — Fri, 13 Oct 2006 09:23:33 -0800

Does anyone have more information about this (1.6M swf, borderline NSFW)? Is there a backstory to it? Who is the character? Who animated it, how, and (aside from the obvious) why? Does that song exist outside the flash, and if so what is it?

what is nsfw?

nyxxxx — Wed, 16 Aug 2006 14:07:48 -0800

What is Not Safe For Work? I know it means no nudity, but where is the line, exactly?

Is profanity forbidden? What about bikinis and bathing suits?

Site sounds, saving?

raildr — Fri, 04 Aug 2006 13:39:23 -0800

[somewhat gross, nsfw] Is there a way to download sounds from this site, http://www.burpsandfarts.com/
All I seem to be able to do is hit play or right click and quicktime pops up. They are, I guess, MP3's.

Favorite random/recent-photo post?

vanoakenfold — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 22:26:46 -0800

Please list sites/pages that are similar to toothpaste's LJ recents and Photobucket's recents. Rules:

Specifically concerning photographs (scanned, digital or otherwise)

Please limit to SFW, but "potentially" NSFW are ok.

Random/oddball "found" photograph blogs are ok.

Buying adult DVDs online

Faint of Butt — Wed, 06 Apr 2005 14:59:28 -0800

Can anyone recommend a good online retailer for adult DVDs? I don't want to risk throwing money at any shady, fly-by-night operation. When I say "good" I mean all the things you'd hope for from an online retailer-- broad selection, good customer service, reliable site security, reasonable prices. You know, like Amazon, only for porn.

Terror Alert Banana redirect

lilboo — Mon, 24 May 2004 07:34:35 -0800

Anyone else notice that the popular Terror Alert Banana now redirects to that *other* NSFW picture? (you may want to check that out if you have it)