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Anonymous (32)

How to deal with harassment when most of the evidence has been deleted

One of my good friends is being harassed by a man she dated for a few months in high school. They are both in their late 20s now. [more inside]
posted by sock it to me on May 30, 2014 - 16 answers

Help me resolve fear about trying to have a creative career.

I am interested in working on a publishing/performing career (think the sort of thing you see on The Moth). However, I am female. I am aware that all women if they get well known anywhere will immediately attract trolls, stalkers, and potential rapists who will constantly send her death threats at bare minimum. Knowing this kind of thing is guaranteed to happen to me if I try to have a creative career makes me terrified to try. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 24, 2014 - 22 answers

How do I deal with this potential street harasser (if at all)?

How do I deal with this potential street harasser (if at all)? Details within. [more inside]
posted by joeyjoejoejr on Apr 16, 2014 - 27 answers

Requesting guidance re: stalkerish ex-friend

Hi all, I have a former friend with mental health issues who is somewhat obsessed with me and has been increasingly creeper-ish over the past year. I just found out today that he now lives within 1.5 miles of me and I'm a bit freaked out. Would like to request input/advice re: next steps, partially because I'm not sure how concerned I should be. More after the cut. [more inside]
posted by cardinality on Mar 17, 2014 - 17 answers

Blocking traffic to my blog

Is there a way to block links from a certain referrer from viewing my Tumblr page, say through a javascript redirect to a blank page or a different page altogether? My blog has appeared on a site known for abuse and harassment and (though I have luckily not received any yet) I'd love to keep it from happening eventually. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 10, 2014 - 5 answers

Sexual Harassment Training: Does it work?

My workplace has never had a sexual harassment training program. Is it worth me making waves to get one implemented? I don't want to create friction for something that will just be mocked and not actually change people's behavior. Are there training programs that are better/more effective than others? [more inside]
posted by abirdinthehand on Mar 9, 2014 - 22 answers

Dangerous neighbor harassing my family. What can I do?

Dangerous neighbor harassing my family. What can I do? This has been going on for almost 15 years now, but yesterday the problem resurfaced. My family (mother, sister and her two young children) live next door to a violent man. [more inside]
posted by Basque13 on Feb 18, 2014 - 21 answers

What is the best way to do deal with out-of-control tech recruiters?

I am searching for a new job in software and one particular recruiting agency is contacting me by phone to a degree that I consider harassment. I am interested in one of the jobs they're pitching, though. What's the best way to handle it? [more inside]
posted by drjimmy11 on Feb 2, 2014 - 18 answers

Not Exactly Mister Rogers

How do I get my elderly neighbor to stop harassing me? [more inside]
posted by SkylitDrawl on Jan 28, 2014 - 65 answers

Should I mention sexual harassment in a job interview?

The primary reason I'm interviewing for another job two months into a new position is because this potential job is a better fit with my interests and will better prepare me to move forward in the field. The secondary reason is because I want to escape the subtle but frequent and unwelcome sexual harassment going on at my current job and the office culture that is aware of this one man's behavior but doesn't see it as a problem. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 28, 2013 - 22 answers

Pranks for nothing: anonymous, international version.

For the last day, my phone has been targeted by the "have two random cellphones call each other simultaneously and see what happens when someone picks up" prank, similar to what is available through websites I won't advertise here. (Google, "have two phones call each other prank." Yes, I looked up the 4 I could find, and registered on all of them to have my number blocked....it's still happening.) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 21, 2013 - 6 answers

How to deal with harassment via iMessage?

Several people unknown to me (teenage girls, based on the content) have been group-texting me, an adult man, via iMessage sporadically over the past few months despite repeated explicit demands from me that they stop. How do I deal with this? At first it was just annoying but I am getting quite concerned. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 4, 2013 - 21 answers

It'd be improper to tell him his joke made me suicidal, I guess.

I keep finding myself in a peculiar and incredibly disheartening group social dynamic. I need practical guidance on how to "fix" the latest one, and maybe some suggestions on how to head these things off before we get to Suicidal Ideation pass. [more inside]
posted by Fee Phi Faux Phumb I Smell t'Socks o' a Puppetman! on Jun 22, 2013 - 58 answers

Help me out. I think I've been harassed and I don't know what to do.

So I need some sound advice. I think I was harassed a number of months ago at a local YMCA by another member. I decided to file this complaint internally, and now I'm worried I'm being stonewalled. Normally I would let something like this slide, but I've decided to take up this cause because I think it's the honorable thing to do. If only because I am inspired by the anti-bullying movement. Do I have legal options? Can somebody with any experience or strength with this sort of thing help me figure out what exactly happened to me, and share what they did in a similar situation? Details within. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 1, 2013 - 32 answers

Either the government or the movies are calling.

For the last four months, I've been getting anywhere between 3 and 60 calls per day on my cell phone from (555) 555-5555, at all hours. If I pick up, it's a recorded voice, somewhere between a computer and a british lady saying "one... one... one..." What the hell is going on, and how do I make it stop? [more inside]
posted by Jon_Evil on Jan 23, 2013 - 13 answers

How to stop my colleague undermining me at work?

At work, my slightly-more-experienced colleague makes a habit of saying subtle and/or ambigious cricitisms, disguised as innocent remarks. I spoke to management about it recently but they couldn't see the problem. How should I deal with a work colleague who tries to undermine me and make me look bad, but who is subtle enough not to get caught? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 19, 2012 - 27 answers

Harassed at work?

How to sort out my feelings and figure out next steps after a disturbing incident? [more inside]
posted by altopower on Oct 26, 2012 - 58 answers

Stalking is so 1975

How to handle weird notes from apartment neighbor [more inside]
posted by cartoonella on Sep 4, 2012 - 68 answers

Professor Creepy Comes to Town

Former professor made a pass at me. This was upsetting because I consider him a mentor and didn't think he had those kind of motivations towards me. Now he is in town and wants to take me out. What should I say? [more inside]
posted by idle on Aug 17, 2012 - 59 answers

I've never met you, this is crazy. What's your number? Don't call me, maybe?

What's up with 774-8283? This appears to be a spoofed phone number calling to harass people at random. How are they doing this, and what can be done about it? Question about American phone calls, probably won't apply internationally. [more inside]
posted by The Winsome Parker Lewis on Jun 7, 2012 - 5 answers

Don't Have a Man, Don't Need One, Thanks.....

I get hit on a lot at work. It's not flattering at all. I find it very embarrassing and demoralizing. I don't know how to cope. [more inside]
posted by chara on Jun 4, 2012 - 62 answers

A thousand Silkwood showers would not be enough.

A married coworker made a pass at me - help me stop feeling like I need to peel all my skin off. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 2, 2012 - 38 answers

How can I help my partner feel better after a random assault?

Some random jerk threatened my partner in public a few days ago and he's still pretty shaken, and can't stop thinking about it. What resources can I offer to help him cope? [more inside]
posted by rhiannonstone on May 29, 2012 - 18 answers

Bad Neighbor!

Neighbor is using an ultra-high-frequency device against us at very high decibels. It causes constant low-grade nausea and a long-lasting ringing in the ears afterwards. Problem is, it can't really be heard because its such a high-frequency. Cops have come to our house, felt the nausea and ear-ringing themselves, but refuse to do anything about it because they can't "hear" it and we have no way of recording it. My question is: Can you point me towards a device that can record high decibel sound in very high frequencies so we can show objectively that this is happening? [more inside]
posted by captain cosine on May 28, 2012 - 51 answers

Harmless glance or red flag?

My sister received a dream job offer but for one thing - the man who will be her direct supervisor was definitely looking at her boobs both times she went into the office for the interviews. [more inside]
posted by pluot on May 21, 2012 - 33 answers

Am I being overly sensitive about an ex visiting my blog?

Someone I dated years ago obsessively visits my blogs and leaves messages. The messages aren't threatening, but they're starting to annoy me. Can I do anything about it? Should I? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 21, 2012 - 23 answers

Harassed-- person will not accept any kind of response.

What can you do in this situation? I'm tired of getting harassed and tired of seeing my boyfriend get harassed. Can I file a no-contact order? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 2, 2012 - 10 answers

Help my family get protection from an unwell, potentially violent woman.

How can I arrange action to be taken against a mentally ill woman who is harassing my family? [more inside]
posted by v.barboni on Feb 28, 2012 - 6 answers

How to stop people hassling street kiosk workers

My friends' street kiosk: They are suffering bullying by drunkards and feral 14 year olds. Suggestions for how to deal? [more inside]
posted by yoHighness on Jan 17, 2012 - 28 answers

Requesting advice from sensible people: how to navigate sensitive dramatic issue

I had an abortion years ago. Now, years later, I am being accused of "faking" the abortion, and am being harassed via social media sites. Help me figure out how to navigate this situation with dignity and class. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 13, 2011 - 57 answers

Should I file a restraining order against my ex?

Considering a restraining order against an ex, but I have a lot of questions about the logistics and just generally whether it's going to make the situation better or worse. For example, I don't think he knows where I live- so how would it even work? Many more questions inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 26, 2011 - 23 answers

Don't You Touch Me

I've been sexually assaulted and heavily/distressingly harassed by a number of different men throughout my life already. Now I'm trying to break it off with a close friend because I feel like I "need a break" from even being close to men and he won't stop even mildly pushing at this. [more inside]
posted by DisreputableDog on Nov 19, 2011 - 24 answers

Statistics regarding acts of vengence against women if they fight back against harassment?

Does anyone know of statistics or studies regarding repercussions to women as a result of filing sexual harassment charges, or otherwise fighting back against daily harassment (cat calling, etc)? In the US, but interested in any data.
posted by korej on Nov 15, 2011 - 5 answers

Dealing with Unruly Youth

I was harassed by some teenagers on the street and kicked one of them, how could I have handled this better? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 6, 2011 - 85 answers

You stay in your state, I'll stay in mine.

Can I obtain a domestic violence restraining order in California against a person who lives in another state? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 17, 2011 - 5 answers

My friend is being stalked and harassed, how can we help?

How can I help a friend protect herself from a stalker? [more inside]
posted by Saminal on Apr 17, 2011 - 17 answers

I have a friend who has a boyfriend who despises me. What should I do?

I have an online friend who has a boyfriend who despises me. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 7, 2011 - 33 answers

Sexual Harassment in SF&F Fandom

You're at a science-fiction and fantasy convention. As you peruse the programming schedule, you come across a panel titled "Sexual Harassment in SF&F Fandom (one hour)". What would you expect to learn from that panel? [more inside]
posted by magstheaxe on Dec 1, 2010 - 26 answers

over-sensitive barista?

What to do about inappropriate, verging-on-harassment behavior from a recently hired coworker & soon-to-be manager who I'll only be working with for a short time? [more inside]
posted by afabulousbeing on Sep 15, 2010 - 17 answers

Leave me alone, I'm here to run.

Help me run without being harassed. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 1, 2010 - 103 answers

Work's gone sour

I've worked at the same place for nearly 11 years, have had above average evaluations, and received three promotions. However, lately, in my manager's eyes I can do nothing right. I feel as if she's harassing me. Can I do anything? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 13, 2010 - 12 answers

Are employees protected by workplace harassment when the harassment is not an employee?

Are employees of nursing homes and group homes (nurses, management, counselors) protected under the realm of workplace harassment laws when the harassment is from the family members of the residents? [more inside]
posted by jasonspaceman on Jul 6, 2010 - 3 answers

I'm being harassed in a public-facing job

I work at a radio station in a big city, and am being harassed by one of our listeners. How to deal? [more inside]
posted by frosty_hut on Jun 23, 2010 - 20 answers

The right to control an ex's dating habits?

What legal, moral or ethical rights does ex-spouse A have when it comes to controlling ex-spouse B's dating habits, under the guise of protecting their children? [more inside]
posted by Ziggy Zaga on Jun 16, 2010 - 17 answers

Too much workplace drama. Work it out or jump ship?

Three managers constantly create a triangle of drama and I'm in the middle. Fight it or move on? [more inside]
posted by stormpooper on Apr 26, 2010 - 13 answers

Does civility work?

Unwanted butt grabbing of men by women [more inside]
posted by Iggley on Apr 19, 2010 - 30 answers

Animal Control officer harassing us over unregistered dog. Can arrests be made for fines not paid?

Animal Control officer harassing us over unregistered dog. Can arrests be made for fines not paid? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 12, 2010 - 18 answers

Should I tattle?

I think I've been sexually harassed at work. I want to go to someone, but I'm worried this might have repercussions for me. My question is very long, so I apologize. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 7, 2010 - 40 answers

Am I crazy or did he just say that?

My coworker is saying things that I'm not sure are inappropriate or considered harassment. Where's the line, and what do I do about it? [more inside]
posted by Lizsterr on Jan 25, 2010 - 54 answers

How can I resist the temptation to despair?

How can I resist the temptation to despair as I get older and still find myself unable to break consistent patterns of frustration in my work and personal life? (long) [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 12, 2009 - 14 answers

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