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How do I tell my boss I can't make it to a work-related social event?

My weekend is overbooked to the tune of family vs. work. Help me figure out how to tell my very difficult boss about this the right way. [more inside]
posted by chatelaine on Jan 29, 2013 - 12 answers

How to arrange family vacation with adult siblings but without parents?

My sister (married, one child) and I (married, no kids) want to plan a joint family vacation. We do not want our parents (divorced, both remarried) to come. Our mom is extremely sensitive/dramatic, and we are hoping to avoid a major meltdown from her. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 26, 2013 - 16 answers

Tax implications of being "bought out" of a percentage of a realty trust

My two sisters and I were equal beneficiaries in a realty trust. This past year, my older sister bought my 1/3 share (as well as that of my sister.) According to the legal documents, it was a "transfer of beneficial interest". Other than signing and notarizing the documents to transfer the real estate share, nothing else official occurred and my sister just paid us our fair share of the assessed market value. She is not planning on reporting the transaction. I have no idea if I owe taxes on the money I've received (and will also be receiving this year - it was divided into a few payments) and if so, what kind of tax that might be. [more inside]
posted by nekton on Jan 24, 2013 - 10 answers

Help me not ruin my sister's wedding.

My younger sister is getting married, and there are a million ways this could go wrong for me. Help me not ruin her wedding. [more inside]
posted by dekathelon on Jan 24, 2013 - 43 answers

I need a help with a vaca destination in Caribbean or Central America

I am planning a vacation and tortured by all the choices. I'm thinking of the Caribbean or Central America (but open to just about anyplace). I need help narrowing it down. The trip is for my husband, my 5 year old son and me. We'd be flying from Boston and going for a week. So much more inside... [more inside]
posted by beccaj on Jan 22, 2013 - 21 answers

PLS assuage my guilt about refusing to beat my head on a cold shoulde

My brother assumed the worst about why I didn't attend a family event out of town. He wouldn't return my calls or texts to just talk about it. Other members of the family insist I should keep trying to 'get through'. I feel like I never deserved his anger and I don't deserve his further disdain. Help me stop torturing myself about it. [more inside]
posted by Tandem Affinity on Jan 19, 2013 - 24 answers

Guess what normal is: household income edition

Were you in a single-income doctor's family in the US during the 1990s? Help me reconstruct what lifestyle and education my siblings and I might have enjoyed if my mother hadn't been a pathologically miserly narcissist. Many, many details inside. [more inside]
posted by stuck on an island on Jan 19, 2013 - 88 answers

Is moving out just an escape?

Is it better to approach family issues from within, or wait until you can gain an outside perspective? [more inside]
posted by cucumber patch on Jan 17, 2013 - 31 answers

What to do in case of 'helicopter parents'?

I am a young adult woman living in the home she grew up in, with parents and siblings. My parents are NOT abusive - they have always provided me with a place where I felt safe and cared for. But the way they relate to me now that I've gone to college and come back has not changed since I was several years younger, and I think it's affecting me negatively. I need to figure out what my action plan is for establishing my independence, both materially and emotionally. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 17, 2013 - 78 answers

How to let go of bad family relationships?

Asking for advice and book recommendations for letting go of bad family relationships. [more inside]
posted by yawper on Jan 17, 2013 - 5 answers

Help me fill in this vague recollection of a story I read?

Help me fill in this vague recollection of a story I read? I read it probably as recently as last year. I don't remember if it's a short story or an incident in a novel. [more inside]
posted by Infinity_8 on Jan 17, 2013 - 6 answers

Stay on target....stay on target

Looking for experiences related to reconnecting with estranged family for very limited purposes. [more inside]
posted by angrycat on Jan 16, 2013 - 5 answers

How to feel good about my financial independence?

This could come across as a stupid question to many people but I'd like to know how I can "feel & think better" about my financial independence from my partner. Sometimes I get a nagging feeling inside that I'd be a happier person if my partner just took care of everything and I didn't have to work so damn hard. I know I should embrace the fact that I have financial independence, am debt-free, good with money, savings and so on and feel good about being able to take care of myself. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 16, 2013 - 21 answers

What do you LOVE about being a parent?

I have a very easy time picturing the ways in which having children would negatively impact my life and career -- I can imagine the exhaustion and the chaos and the drudgery with crystal clarity -- but the good parts are much more hazy. What great stuff does your kids bring into your life? What do you love about having had a family? What makes all the difficulties and sacrifices worthwhile for you? [more inside]
posted by Narrative Priorities on Jan 15, 2013 - 87 answers

Which way past this impasse?

How do I reconcile my parents and my fiance? Should I even try? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 11, 2013 - 25 answers

Is my mother potentially complicit in fraud?

My generous, trusting mother was conned out of tens of thousands of dollars (gradually) by a good-for-nothing young cousin over the course of a few years. When my mother ran into financial trouble last year, she sought repayment of these "loans." The cousin insisted that she didn't have to pay back a cent and promptly disappeared. She reappeared last week with a very large check, written directly to my mother's bank, and written by some random guy. I'm worried that the cousin has simply conned somebody else ("please, my home is being foreclosed on, I really need this loan, you can even write it directly to the bank") to cover part of her debt. She isn't talking, and my trusting mother is angry that I'd suggest such a thing. (So a lawyer is out of the question.) Is my mother potentially complicit in fraud by depositing this check?
posted by anonymous on Jan 11, 2013 - 15 answers

Where can I find a good family tree template online?

I want to create a family tree that includes my grandparents, my parents and their siblings, and all their children (my cousins), and finally my siblings children. If possible I'd also like to include everyone's spouses as well. Ideally I want to be able to include photos, and contact information for each of them. I could certainly try to create this myself but realized someone else has probably done the same thing so I'm hoping I can spare myself the extra work. Can anyone help me with this request?
posted by Wanderer7 on Jan 9, 2013 - 3 answers

Disclose sibling graduate school attendance?

My sibling is at the same graduate school to which I'm applying (she PhD, me Master's for now). The application asks how I learned about the program. Mention the family connection? [more inside]
posted by c'mon sea legs on Jan 7, 2013 - 29 answers

I hate funerals

My grandfather's sister-in-law died and her funeral is this weekend. My family wants me to drive my grandfather down to the funeral. I would rather stick pins under my fingers. But I know I need to do this. Help me suck it up. [more inside]
posted by calcetina on Jan 2, 2013 - 57 answers

Help plan a 3 week Italy Trip

I need help planning a trip to Italy this summer/2013 with my daughter for her 14th birthday (golden). Would like to see parts of the south and North. I am a bit nervous about traveling alone. Looking for tips on two week itinery, lodging, family oriented plans. I would like to start in the south as my mother's family is from Montefaconi, Rome, and then north. I have considered a week long tour in the south and then traveling Rome and northern on our own. Would consider a homebase in the north for 4-5days but where to stay??
posted by snztt99 on Dec 28, 2012 - 12 answers

Living Like A King

I'm looking for information on the structure of life for members of the British Royal Family, particularly the lives of heirs to the throne: protocols, responsibilities, duties, etc. Do they have support staffs from childhood? Are they surrounded 24/7 by huge security details? Are there media consultants and imaging experts? Do they do their own grocery shopping? Do they have "days off" and what would that even mean in this context? [more inside]
posted by davidjmcgee on Dec 28, 2012 - 5 answers

How to motivate immigrant in-laws?

How do we help our non-English-speaking immigrant in-laws adapt to the United States, especially when their notions of respectability and gender roles seem to be holding them back? Details inside. [more inside]
posted by Clambone on Dec 27, 2012 - 30 answers

R is for... really cool gift that begins with R?

I need to buy a few small gifts that begin with the letter R for a family gift exchange. My budget is $20, the potential recipients range from an 18 year old college freshman to a 70 year old. [more inside]
posted by booksherpa on Dec 26, 2012 - 18 answers

Please evaluate my brother-in-law's plan?

Brother-in-law wants a loan to start a home-based business. Please evaluate if his plan seems profitable? [more inside]
posted by 99percentfake on Dec 26, 2012 - 35 answers

How can I support my husband while he sets boundaries with his family?

How do I best support my partner when he sets boundaries with his passive-aggressive family, particularly when the boundaries are about how they've been treating me? Wall of text, with bonus holiday drama, inside! [more inside]
posted by SeedStitch on Dec 26, 2012 - 38 answers

Should I bring up this family incident from the past that still upsets me?

Should I bring up this family incident from the past that still upsets me? [more inside]
posted by sunflower16 on Dec 25, 2012 - 32 answers

Feeling ignored by my loved ones.

How do I deal with feeling ignored? [more inside]
posted by Rosengeist on Dec 25, 2012 - 19 answers

Why does my grandmother treat me like a child? What do I have to do to be seen as an adult?

I'm 30 years old. I recently moved to the complete opposite coast of the country and have been living on my own successfully. [more inside]
posted by starpoint on Dec 25, 2012 - 50 answers

She doesn't want help, but I want to help her.

How to convince someone who may be schizophrenic to seek help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 24, 2012 - 9 answers

A funeral with a crazy family estrangement scenario

How do I deal with my estranged brother at our grandmother's funeral? [more inside]
posted by Lulu's Pink Converse on Dec 23, 2012 - 16 answers

Help me deal with my sister's baby daddy's behavior.

I have a problem with my little sister's baby daddy. He's racist, bigoted, irresponsible, and I can see that he's a bad person for my sister and their child. It's driving me crazy, and being around him is breaking my heart. What can/should I do? Warning: some derogatory language within. [more inside]
posted by your mom's a sock puppet on Dec 22, 2012 - 47 answers

Cape Town Family Day Trips?

What are some great family day trips from Cape Town, South Africa? [more inside]
posted by fairmettle on Dec 22, 2012 - 6 answers

I'm sorry I don't feel pain the way you think I should, but...

A couple of weeks ago, I moved out of my marital home (details in my posting history). Whilst I seem to be doing okay, most people expect me to not be. In fact, they seem to expect a fragility and sadness from me that I'm not feeling even remotely. This has lead to some judgements from people that I could have done without. How can I navigate the sympathy of folks during the holiday season without having to pretend to be an emotional mess (which I'm not) and without suffering judgement from people who don't know the whole story (Which I can happily live without). [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Dec 22, 2012 - 27 answers

Making him happy

Help me plan weekly surprises for my grandfather! [more inside]
posted by xicana63 on Dec 19, 2012 - 16 answers

Family vs. Career

Is it more important to be near family or to follow career developments? Snowflakey existential question that needs review. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 18, 2012 - 15 answers

How can I get my brother to pluck his unibrow?

How can I get my brother to pluck his unibrow or want to improve his image? He is 25, doesn't maintain his beard/sideburns and has very thick unibrow. He uses a wheelchair and I'm afraid his appearance is giving off the wrong impression. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 18, 2012 - 34 answers

Partners in business and in life - a bad idea?

When should I (or should I) reveal that my partner is applying for for my old job, given that I now work in a new job in the same institution? Or is the whole thing a bad idea? Managers and HR people, your input would be especially appreciated. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 17, 2012 - 5 answers

Helping a family member of the 1st anniversary of their spouse's death

My mother and father were married over 50 years. Dad passed early this year (Feb) and now is the 1st anniversary is upon us. I have been helping mom out quite a bit since then, but could use some pointers about what to do or look out for over the next couple of months. A little more inside. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 16, 2012 - 6 answers

Help me buy clothes for someone who hates clothes.

Should I get my brother clothes for Christmas? Good gift ideas for an ABD? [more inside]
posted by kat518 on Dec 15, 2012 - 10 answers

Baby Mamma Drama?

I'm going to have a discussion about what my son's father thinks is excessive child support in a few hours. Please help me frame what I want to say in a non-argumentative, non-condescending, non-bitchy way? [more inside]
posted by youandiandaflame on Dec 15, 2012 - 56 answers

How to navigate cross cultural family dynamics?

I'm having difficulty navigating very different cross-cultural (U.S./El Salvador) family dynamics. Can you please offer me books, links or your own best practices on keeping an international marriage strong? [more inside]
posted by Coffee Bean on Dec 14, 2012 - 8 answers

Tips and techniques for keeping in touch with people more often?

I want to keep in touch better with family and friends. What are your techniques, tools, and strategies for doing this? [more inside]
posted by cadge on Dec 12, 2012 - 11 answers

What to expect, and how to deal?

My mother was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer in May this year. We've just been told she now has 6 months to live. Help me with what to expect. [more inside]
posted by sunshine arakhan on Dec 10, 2012 - 22 answers

Dad, my Headphones don't work...again

Cheap headphones that can survive children...are there such things? [more inside]
posted by thanotopsis on Dec 5, 2012 - 4 answers

Do I Stay or Do I Go?

How do I deal with the stress and drama caused by my emotionally manipulative live-in sister? The emotional welfare of her two young children is also at stake. Special snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by BrianJ on Dec 3, 2012 - 18 answers

Dealing with a Toxic Sibling

How do you deal with a toxic sibling who ruins every family event? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 3, 2012 - 21 answers

Meeting extended family.

Meeting the extended family over Christmas - pointers to help it go well? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 2, 2012 - 8 answers

It sounds like my sister's twins aren't going to make it. Now what?

Family drama: what should we be doing? This was me. Last night, my pregnant-with-twins sister went to the ER with bleeding and what felt like early contractions. [more inside]
posted by kat518 on Dec 2, 2012 - 38 answers

Should I write guidelines for my obituary?

Should I write guidelines for my obituary? [more inside]
posted by lankford on Nov 30, 2012 - 26 answers

How to Upload Photos For Which I Have No Digital Copies to Online Storage for High Quality Prints Later?

Best Way to Scan/Store Print Photos Without Digital Copies? [more inside]
posted by white_magnolia on Nov 29, 2012 - 3 answers

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