1808 posts tagged with Family.
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Telling Parents About Depression

I was interviewed for a national podcast and spoke frankly about my depression and my occasional suicidal thoughts. It airs in six weeks. I've not told my family about my depression. I want to tell them before the podcast airs. How do I do that? [more inside]
posted by Joey Michaels on Apr 5, 2015 - 5 answers

Must-do, must-see New England activities for a family

Mrs. Ferg and I are planning a trip to New England in June with the smaller Fergs. Since my previous questions about travel activities have been successes, I'm here to query the hive-mind about what our agenda should include to get the maximal "New England" experience. Of course, there's [more inside]
posted by jferg on Apr 5, 2015 - 22 answers

My mom is lonely and alone. Can I offer healthy support with boundaries?

I recently posted my current situation here. I'm still struggling with a longstanding issue: My mom's undiagnosed (notwithstanding a brief stint on anti-depressants 15 years ago following her divorce) possible depression. About once or twice a year I find myself with her while she sobs uncontrollably and talks about how lonely and alone she feels as she ages. These are all valid feelings and fears, but everytime I bring up seeing a counsellor to help her get her life back on track, giver her tools to cope, filter out the negative energy in her life (such as her codependent relationship with her 29 y/o son), she refuses to admit there is a problem. [more inside]
posted by stumblingthroughitall on Mar 31, 2015 - 12 answers

Is my friend using his personal problems as a weapon against us?

A friend of mine is having some pretty severe personal issues, but refuses to get help and gets mad at anyone who says anything he even remotely doesn't like. Is it time to cut ties and/or call him out? [more inside]
posted by stedman15 on Mar 29, 2015 - 18 answers

Parting ways with a childhood home

I'm having trouble letting go of my childhood home that I inherited, and the lifetime of stuff inside it. I could use some advice about how to move on. [more inside]
posted by Banknote of the year on Mar 24, 2015 - 28 answers

"Hey Dad, I Didn't Know You Cared!" or How to Reply?

My biological dad suddenly emailed me out of the blue. I have only been approached by him one other time. I am not exactly sure how to proceed here. Prepare for wall of text as my family history is straight out of the Jerry Springer Show. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 21, 2015 - 59 answers

Cross-cultural relationship, family problems

We are planning a future together... If only my family would accept him in spite of his race and religion. Snowflakes entail. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 17, 2015 - 20 answers

Excluded on Discount

Is it rude if everyone at a dinner table receives a discount except you? [more inside]
posted by Asian_Hunnie on Mar 14, 2015 - 24 answers

Like tie-dye, only not. Party crafting for grown-ups!

Last year for my birthday, my family came over for dinner and cake, and we tie-dyed. It was THE BEST. I'd like to do something similar this year - fun for all ages (4 year old - 60 year old, 8-10 people), easy to do, somewhat quick, doesn't require everyone sitting down at the same time and "doing a craft", not too "lame" for the adults, but not too complex that the 4 1/2 year old can't do it without a little help. Tie-dying was fun for everyone, but I'd don't want to do it two years in a row. I've got two weeks and can get pretty much anything in store or from the internet. Willing to spend a bit of cash. Thanks!
posted by firei on Mar 14, 2015 - 29 answers

LA + baby + travel = SUPER GREAT, right?

The husband, the baby and I are flying to LA for a week on very short notice (Saturday). I'll be busy for most of the days; he'll be bopping around with the kid (and is familiar with the area). We'll have one full day for fun together. Ideas and tips? [more inside]
posted by St. Hubbins on Mar 4, 2015 - 5 answers

Kill 'em with kindness strategy is not going to work on me.

Have I lost perspective here? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Mar 4, 2015 - 50 answers

Missed text = 6 weeks of silent treatment? Really? How do I solve this.

My birthday was a couple of days ago, and I didn't receive a card or a gift from my sister, which I thought was strange as we've always sent each other something on our birthdays. I did talk to my mom, who told me that my sister didn't send me anything because she was mad that I didn't reply to a text she had sent at Christmas. I live on the opposite side of the country, and she sent me a picture of the family Christmas dinner. I had just spoken to her that same day so I didn't think a reply was expected. I actually didn't think about it much at all. We've never kept in touch very often (~monthly) so I didn't pick up on anything, but apparently she's been fuming mad at me for weeks! How do I resolve this? [more inside]
posted by piper4 on Mar 2, 2015 - 18 answers

Brother with cancer; now what?

My 30 year-old brother called me last night to tell me that he has been diagnosed with testicular cancer (based on blood markers/physical examination). His CT scan is later this week, and he'll be scheduled for surgery/radiation/? shortly depending on the results. If you have been through this, what can I do or not do to make this easier for him? [more inside]
posted by My Top Secret Sock Puppet Account on Mar 2, 2015 - 11 answers

A question for only children with elderly/aging parents

As my question might imply, I'm an only child and I'm a little concerned as to how I'll be taking care of my parents in their old age. While they're not frail and elderly, they are in their 50s with various health issues and they're certainly not going to be getting any younger. I'm thinking a lot about my future lately and a large part of that includes this. Most people I know share that responsibility with their siblings, which I assume does make it a little easier (but I know that's not always the case). Right now I live with them but that won't always be the case obviously. Plus, I've got a lot of emotional/mental health struggles of my own so I'm concerned that I might get overwhelmed with the added responsibility. Extended family members won't be a resource either because of a number of issues. I know this might be a little early for me to be thinking about this, but I want to be prepared. [more inside]
posted by KTN on Feb 28, 2015 - 17 answers

I am feeling stuck in a serious rut. How to reboot?

In my mid-20s, going nowhere, full of shame. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Feb 26, 2015 - 18 answers

Family Vacation. To go or not to go.

I need help deciding if I need to suck it up and go on a family vacation and if I don't, how to deal with the guilt of missing out on family events. [more inside]
posted by monologish on Feb 25, 2015 - 12 answers

Coping without having parents?

Coping without parents in your adult life? [more inside]
posted by thelivingsea on Feb 21, 2015 - 21 answers

60s documentary on living in the mountains of Alaskan/Canada with family

Im almost positive I watched a documentary, linked on the blue, about a family living in the woods in an idyllic rural part of either Canada or Alaska. I cannot for the life of me find it, but I'll bet you can help me! [more inside]
posted by andromache on Feb 19, 2015 - 7 answers

Family Puerto Rico trip on short notice

We (my husband, me, 4 year old kid) are thinking of going to Puerto Rico for a week in early-mid March. We know almost nothing except that we want to not be cold for a few days. Where do we start? Is this a good idea or is the snow affecting our judgement? So many questions. [more inside]
posted by tchemgrrl on Feb 18, 2015 - 9 answers

She's going back to the land...

Can the Hive Mind help me in brainstorming the perfect family homestead? [more inside]
posted by polly_dactyl on Feb 12, 2015 - 35 answers

Beneficiaries: none?

There is no one in my life… so who benefits from my death? Not a request for legal estate advice. I need to sort out my limited beneficiary options given my dismal family situation. Help? [more inside]
posted by falldownpaul on Feb 10, 2015 - 28 answers

How do we tell his family that we are having a secular wedding?

My fiance and I are both atheists with strong antitheist views. We're getting married in November and want something that represents us. His family, however, is extremely religious (Baptist) and will have certain expectations of us; they don't easily take no for an answer. What is the best way to balance the two worlds? [more inside]
posted by DriftingLotus on Feb 8, 2015 - 30 answers

Let me know if there's anything I can do to help... no really!

What can I do to help my co-worker who's dealing with family illness? My co-worker's mom was diagnosed with brain and lung cancer several months ago and going through treatment with a poor prognosis, and then this week her dad had a seizure. My co-worker is now in the situation of having to be the sole care-taker (both physically and emotionally) of two very ill parents. I'd like to do something to help -- any suggestions? [more inside]
posted by purplevelvet on Feb 6, 2015 - 23 answers

The Game of Life

Trying to identify this elaborate custom-tailored performance art/ARG project I read about, possibly on MetaFilter, circa 2007-2010. Basically: you apply for the chance to have this group go to your hometown and stage an elaborate theatrical experience personalized to you, starring all your friends and family, for the purposes of creating a powerful emotional experience. [more inside]
posted by Rhaomi on Feb 5, 2015 - 3 answers

Mother is too reliant on me - how do I navigate this now?

My mother is increasingly reliant on me for the fulfilment of her emotional needs. Can I do anything to remedy this? [more inside]
posted by Kat_Dubs on Jan 30, 2015 - 17 answers

Tux Police

My brother-in-law is turning 50 and is planning a shindig. [more inside]
posted by terrier319 on Jan 28, 2015 - 35 answers

What to do about my mother-in-law's car?

My mother-in-law has a completely borked car. This is apparently my job to fix. What should I do? [more inside]
posted by miyabo on Jan 27, 2015 - 16 answers

Seeking comfort and grace, not depression and sorrow

The last of my grandparents just passed away (it was peaceful and expected) but I'm struggling to hold myself together. I think my grieving is normal since it just happened but I'd love to hear advice and techniques to think of his life and death in positive, comforting ways. [more inside]
posted by wannabecounselor on Jan 27, 2015 - 10 answers

Help me shut down conversations

I'm related to a person of moderate fame in a (global) community I'm part of. We share a last name. When people ask me my name, I don't tell them my last name, but if it comes up, they ask "Oh, are you related to [famous relative]?" How do I gracefully shut down, redirect, or prevent this conversation? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 23, 2015 - 55 answers

When is a last name left lowercase?

I'm writing a piece of software to go through a very large database and format last names in their correct casing (i.e., smith or SMITH or sMith to Smith.) However, I'm obviously aware some names should be kept as lowercase—but what names? [more inside]
posted by Hot Like Your 12V Wire on Jan 21, 2015 - 17 answers

Discrimination based on family status

If someone comments on a family member and denies you something based on that, is that likely to be discrimination on the basis of family status? [more inside]
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats on Jan 18, 2015 - 17 answers

Is there an expectation you'll fly to visit a family member's newborn?

My brother and his wife had their first child recently. In principle, I'd love to meet their newborn. Problem is, we live on opposite coasts of the US and I don't make much money. I could swing it if I had to, but a trip out there just to stand around the little bundle of biology and watch it eat, sleep, and poop doesn't feel like a good value to me. Am I obligated to go? [more inside]
posted by twobit on Jan 18, 2015 - 57 answers

All-Inclusive Vacations in middle America?

I am looking for creative suggestions for places, either conceptually or specifically, where my mother (East Coast) and I (West Coast) can meet up for a long weekend. My basic goal is to spend time with my mother in a setting where each of us can be comfortable and relax: for me this means not having to play tour guide in a city I've never been, and for my mom this means accommodation for some mobility issues. [more inside]
posted by stellaluna on Jan 15, 2015 - 11 answers

Help me make a bad situation not worse

I'm looking for resources about speaking to my father and dealing with my family in light of his recent mental health issues. [more inside]
posted by FakePalindrome on Jan 15, 2015 - 9 answers

How to help an angry 18 yr old.

A few years back I asked this question. Unfortunately my cousin is still struggling and I am very afraid for his future and the rest of his immediate family. A few weeks ago I asked about rehoming a dog. I was finally able to get some help and an organization contacted me saying that they have someone willing to foster the dog. Great! Except that while I was working on it my aunt basically threw up her hands and turned over the dog to my cousin. [more inside]
posted by mokeydraws on Jan 11, 2015 - 11 answers

My sister has invited me to the delivery room, and I don't want to go.

My older sister is having a baby in a couple of months. She has decided she wants the entire immediate family (parents/siblings/sibling spouses) in there. I really would rather not go, but I also don't know if I'm being unreasonable or selfish, and I don't want to push back if this is something that I need to just say, "Okay, you're the one pushing the baby out, you call the shots." [more inside]
posted by socktothepuppet on Jan 7, 2015 - 57 answers

What books should a dying person read?

My father and step-father (both in their seventies) are nearing the end of their lives, and I want to give them books to read in the time they have left. I'm not looking for anything that's necessarily literally on the topic of death, nor anything religious or self-help-ish. I'm looking for books suitable for a person with limited ability to concentrate due to pain/fatigue, that run the gamut from pleasant & not inappropriate, to ones that will provoke reflection and help them come to terms with dying. Please help with your recommendations. [more inside]
posted by Susan PG on Jan 6, 2015 - 23 answers

How to cope with problems conceiving a second child?

My lovely toddler's third birthday is rapidly approaching and I am having a hard time with the fact that I haven't managed to get pregnant again. What might help me feel less blue about the fact that he won't have a sibling 2-3 years younger than him (like I had originally hoped)? [more inside]
posted by brambory on Jan 5, 2015 - 37 answers

Am I obligated to attend my brother's baby shower after being "flaked"?

My brother's wife is due to have a baby boy sometime this month. I will be an uncle for the first time. The baby shower is taking place this upcoming Sunday. My girlfriend since May of last year is not a big fan of my brother. She hasn't even met him to begin with. She felt that he flaked out on me during my college graduation and birthday last year. [more inside]
posted by tnar23 on Jan 4, 2015 - 60 answers

Baby Bedtime Routine for Working Folks

We discovered this week that our four-month-old needs a much earlier bedtime. We now start the routine after 6 PM, with him in bed by 7 PM (and it's working great). But we've been on vacation for these new bedtimes and I'm having trouble visualizing how this routine will go on a weekday. How do you do it? [more inside]
posted by aabbbiee on Jan 3, 2015 - 16 answers

Perfect storm of familial dysfunctionality--need solutions for sanity

Family dynamics are slowly driving me up the wall, but I can't bear to let things wind destructively. How can I cope without being caught in the storm? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 2, 2015 - 13 answers

on a self-perpetuating downward spiral

I am having somewhat of a huge existential crisis at the moment after just exiting a 5-year serious long-term romantic relationship, one that I was hoping would be permanent and committed. I am having trouble coming to terms with the setup of my life and the course it is taking. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 2, 2015 - 15 answers

Tips for reoccuring, family-style dinner parties?

What are your key tips to throwing a good dinner party? What do you do about that one friend who will. not. stop. eating? What do you think is a good price per head for a group meal? How many people do you think is ideal for a good dinner? [more inside]
posted by rebent on Jan 2, 2015 - 37 answers

How to improve my relationship with my mom

Since my parents divorced, my mom grew more distant from me (and my sibling), particularly when she met a new man, to whom she is now married. I don't know where to go from here to improve our relationship. My apologies in advance for the wall of text that is about to hit you. [more inside]
posted by Blissful on Dec 28, 2014 - 25 answers

Oh, you thought we were done with Xmas gift questions? Think again!

I'll be celebrating christmas with my brother and his girlfriend a week late, but despite the extension, I still can't think of what to give them this year. There are many factors and a few critical elements up in the air, but if anyone can sort through it all and come up with something thoughtful and useful, it'd be Ask Metafilter. [more inside]
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese on Dec 26, 2014 - 16 answers

The Diamond Age: Familying long distance

I'm going to be a world away from my 9 year old nephew. How can I a) set up a Windows 7 netbook in a kid safe way so we can keep in touch, and b) provide some basic tech support, remotely? [more inside]
posted by Elysum on Dec 26, 2014 - 4 answers

Conversation stopper

How do i deal with my cousin's "magic conversation stopper?" [more inside]
posted by IndigoRain on Dec 24, 2014 - 35 answers

Struggling with a needy mother

While I love my mum, she seems to see me as a centre of her happiness and the amount of contact she needs feels like a burden. How to navigate this without upsetting her? [more inside]
posted by sabina_r on Dec 22, 2014 - 23 answers

Family Drama Filter: Help me distance myself from a parent

I've come to realize over the years that while I love my father, I am so different from him, and do not share his and his wife's (he is remarried) lifestyle and values and really wish I could come to accept it and completely distance myself from them. Please help me do this. [more inside]
posted by SanSebastien on Dec 21, 2014 - 7 answers

Rehoming a dog and different attitudes on pet ownership

Some family members have a dog that they can no longer care for. Their lives have gone through a lot of upheaval in the last year. At some point I guess getting a puppy seemed like a good idea? Well it wasn't and now they have an approximately 9 month old dog that is not trained, he barks a lot, and is basically chewing everything and anything including the walls. He is medium sized maybe 40 lbs. A poodle pomeranian shih zsu mix. But kind of looks like an all white lab. I don't know much about dogs. [more inside]
posted by mokeydraws on Dec 19, 2014 - 16 answers

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