229 posts tagged with Ex.
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How to grieve for a pet from afar

My ex texted me yesterday to let me know that one of her cats -- whom I referred to as my step-cats whilst we were together -- was hit by a car yesterday. I'm devastated, though I haven't seen said cat for nearly a year, and I don't know how to process it properly. [more inside]
posted by six sided sock on Dec 1, 2016 - 11 answers

His ex wants to move in with him. Their bond is emotional but not sexual

My current bf had a codependent relationship with his ex, and she helped him through difficult times. Now she is losing her job and wants to move in with him, and he feels responsible for her happiness. Where does this leave me? [more inside]
posted by muppets on Nov 21, 2016 - 45 answers

Was I right to end this relationship?

I just found out that my new boyfriend of 2 months slept with his ex wife after our third date. I ended the relationship. He is now trying to win me back. [more inside]
posted by sockiety on Nov 2, 2016 - 55 answers

After seperation with child, do you consider ex family still?

I have been seperated, and have lived seperately for 3 months from my ex, we have a 14 month old daughter. Looking through my past questions, it's clear I have a hard time setting and sticking to boundaries, and especially hard now in this instance when I'm trying to co-parent with someone who acts as if we are still together, and tells his family we are, and doesn't really listen or believe me when I say I have nothing left to give or hope for. Am I terrible for feeling as if he is not part of my family and I don't want to be part of his due to the fact that we are seperated now? [more inside]
posted by MamaBee223 on Oct 24, 2016 - 22 answers

Friends with an ex's BFF?

BFF of a no-contact ex reached out to me and apparently wants to be friendly. I'm wary. Should I be? [more inside]
posted by wildblueyonder on Sep 9, 2016 - 19 answers

Should I reach out to my ex now?

My ex-boyfriend and I (a woman) were together for the better part of a decade, starting in our mid 20s. We both thought that we would be partners for life. But in the first few weeks of this year, after several months of conversation about our life goals, I decided to break up with him, because we had grown to have different goals re: marriage & children (I want both; he wanted neither). I do not want the relationship back, but I would like for us to stay in touch. Is now an okay time to reach out? Please read the rest. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 5, 2016 - 24 answers

Guilt and sadness

About six weeks ago, a friend/ex-fwb wrote a facebook message to me that made me uncomfortable - it sexualized our friendship and didn't respect the boundaries I had set for it. This was after a few times when I had told him he was going too far, and I finally laid into him. 4 weeks later, he committed suicide. I have so many weird feelings about this, and I want advice about processing the death of someone and the guilt I feel about my last interactions with him. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Aug 21, 2016 - 12 answers

Getting rid of toxic roommate when "GTFO" isn't as easy as it sounds?

TL;DR: How do you get rid of a toxic roommate when they literally have nowhere to go, no one else willing to take them in, and no money to find a place of their own? IF it gets ugly, violent, I'll call my friend who lives in the complex and get help with immediate removal... but I don't want to make this guy homeless unless he becomes a real threat. I'm trying to think of clear ways to communicate boundaries and deadlines, such as giving X amount of time to save up deposits for a place of his own now that he has a job again. That's the kind of advice I need please. [more inside]
posted by myShanon on Aug 17, 2016 - 69 answers

A man, a girlfriend, and an ex (or two): now what?

My boyfriend is driving six hours to spend the night at an ex's place. I don't know what to do from here. More inside. [more inside]
posted by Amy93 on Jul 28, 2016 - 84 answers

Statute of Limitations on Saying Nasty Things After a Bad Breakup

Long story lots of snowflake details to follow. First girlfriend and I broke up about 10 years ago. Haven't spoken since. I made the mistake of looking at her social media accounts recently out of curiosity, and uh...she has been saying some pretty mean things about me. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jun 20, 2016 - 25 answers

Co-workers in hate

How to deal with co-worker that you dated and now have to work closely with, but your angst doesn’t stem from having dated, but just from the fact that you know too much about them now and really don’t like them as a person? [more inside]
posted by greta simone on Jun 3, 2016 - 11 answers

Ex's grandma just passed away. Should I text him?

I was dating this 23-yo guy for about 5 months but we were never official. We broke up in March because I wanted the relationship to progress and he didn't. Since then, we still continue to talk and we hang out as friends about once a month. He knows that I want us to get back together since I've initiated us hanging out the past few times. He's told me he enjoys my company and he's considering giving us another chance. The last time we met, he told me he'd text me when he's done with his final exams so we can meet up. I just found out through FB that his grandmother just passed away. I never got to meet any of his family but he has talked about them before. Would it be okay if I send a text sharing my condolence? I really do feel bad for him. Or should I just wait and see if he texts me to meet up and then tell him in person?
posted by missybitsy on May 16, 2016 - 29 answers

Living with ex. It's going well. How do I keep it going?

How do I keep this going?---We're best friends living together--2 gay men---after 7 year relationship . My mental health nosedived, I got angry 24/7,my lover became a caretaker who kept me from worst impulses--he quit his job for years just to deal with my harmful ways. But now we have a house, lots of dogs, a fledgling business. Finally getting the right help, I've stopped playing destructive head games. I miss partner but best friends thing is actually working better than much of the relationship did. We actually talk more, get along better. what gives? [more inside]
posted by caveatz on May 3, 2016 - 14 answers

Asking Ex About Why He is Using a Picture of Us on a Dating App

I happened upon my ex's profile on a dating app and of course, I looked at it. I was completely shaken to see that he is using a picture of US as the last of his 6 pictures. I was upset and in a pretty passive way tried to ask him about it through text, which he has not responded to. We have plans to meet up next week and I'm wondering how to address this now. [more inside]
posted by cristalina on Apr 30, 2016 - 28 answers

Preserving the stability I've worked so hard to achieve

After being diagnosed with bipolar II, my partner and I accidentally built my coping strategies around my total emotional reliance on him. Now that I have my career on track and have moved into what was to be "our home," I feel my stability at risk as it truly sinks in that he is exiting the relationship, but wants to remain as friends and a support system. How can I process this grief without compromising my stability? [more inside]
posted by asmith30 on Feb 17, 2016 - 19 answers

How do I navigate the break-up with my first and only love (at age 30)

After having gone through cancer and mental illness together, the love of my life and I are on the verge of splitting up for good. How can I best try to salvage the relationship? Details below. [more inside]
posted by asmith30 on Jan 27, 2016 - 35 answers

Dating a good friend's ex-girlfriend

Two friends of mine broke up a few weeks ago. I've been friends with the man for something close to a decade but became good friends with his then girlfriend over the last year, as well. So it was only natural that me and her continued to hang out, unexpectedly (for both of us) getting closer to each other. We're now at the beginning of a relationship ourselves - not knowing what to do with her ex/my good friend? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jan 6, 2016 - 31 answers

GF's ex-fling offered her a job (and he's the boss)

Before we met, they had a thing. He's offered her a (admittedly amazing) job, but I'm freaking out because she'll report to him. How do I deal? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 12, 2015 - 48 answers

To shiva or not to shiva?

What's the right thing to do here? [more inside]
posted by bookgirl18 on Dec 9, 2015 - 20 answers

How do I start living again while going through a break-up?

The ex and I broke up a little over a month ago. We dated 7 months, and were friends/FWB on and off for 5 years before that since we dated for a month in 2010. A week ago he told me he wants nothing to do with me and I'm heartbroken. I haven't done anything but sleep and watch TV for a week. How do I get out of this slump? [more inside]
posted by Autumn on Oct 25, 2015 - 15 answers

How should my bf navigate a falling out in his social group?

A former fried of my bf stopped speaking to him over some petty issue (he feels slighted for every small thing). I don't like the guy - he treats his gf and other people like crap (talks over them, has a bad temper, impatient, etc.), so I was happy that my bf will stop associating with him. My bf has also come to conclusion he doesn't need to be friends with this guy, but wanted to superficially smooth things over to avoid the awkwardness that has ensued whenever they hang out in their group of common friends. This guy has rebuffed him 3 times and I know my bf is feeling a lot of anxiety and stress about it. What should I tell him to do? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Oct 14, 2015 - 10 answers

How to deal with not being my boyfriend's first?

My BF [26M] is my first. However, I'm [21F] not his. His first was with a good friend with whom he had a 5 year relationship, and still remains good friends with that ex today. They were both each other's first. Out of all the other ex's my BF's had, he only remains friends with this one. Everywhere I look on the internet or in real life, people say they never forget their first love, that they'll always remain a special part of you. Since I've made this realization, I've felt incredibly low. [more inside]
posted by echoplasm on Oct 9, 2015 - 33 answers

Broke up with toxic ex, why do I feel like I did something wrong?

I broke up with my toxic ex roughly 2 weeks ago and I feel real empty and weird. I feel sad and feel like I did something wrong but he mainly to blame for this. More inside [more inside]
posted by ruebeignet on Aug 16, 2015 - 16 answers

How do I deal with this intimate relationship with my ex?

Today is the 1 year anniversary of my divorce. The ex, our child, and I just spent the weekend with his extended family, visiting them in another state. We laughed, played darts, had a great time. We have been doing many things together (volunteering, gardening, walking, watching shows, going out) over the last month or so. Today he broke up with his girlfriend, because, among other reasons, he and I spend so much time together. But there is a problem. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Jul 8, 2015 - 32 answers

Toxic ex broke up with me and wants to get back together

I'm conflicted with this sensitive, hard situation. My ex of 2.5 years broke up with me roughly 4 months ago due to him recently becoming aware of his issues (anger, depression, possible bipolar disorder, childhood issues, binge eating). He seems to be increasingly struggling with his issues day by day He mentioned that he still loves/cares for me, and wants to become a better person for me, build a life together but can't do these things until he gets better. We've talked on and off after the break up. He saw me out with a new guy and is now worried about potentially losing me and wants to get back together. [more inside]
posted by ruebeignet on Jun 23, 2015 - 37 answers

You're my ex-boyfriend. How would you want to find out I'm engaged?

My (current) boyfriend (fiancé!) proposed to me very recently and we've been letting our family and friends know at our own pace. I'm very fond of my ex-boyfriend and I want him to find out in the least weird or awkward way. What is that? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 21, 2015 - 41 answers

I don't want to see you but here you are

I just found out that my ex is planning on attending a New Year's Eve party I am going to and it is causing me a lot of stress. Strategies for dealing with this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Dec 26, 2014 - 17 answers

What's the etiquette for catching up with "exes"?

Specifically if you are in a serious relationship with someone else. I'm sure this varies among couples and the best thing is probably just to talk to each other openly...but before I bring it up with my boyfriend, I wanted to get some unbiased advice to make sure I'm not stepping across a line because I do feel weird about it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Nov 25, 2014 - 26 answers

Relationship question: My girl friend's feeling toward her ex

I and my girl friend have been dating for eight months. I think everything is good between us so far except for few occasions where we had a disagreement in the past (my two previous questions are about those occasions). We did not have any problem recently. I introduced her to my mom, and she introduced me to hers. The major problem I have with myself is that she said she cared about her ex. [more inside]
posted by mbn1455 on Oct 28, 2014 - 32 answers

I love you so we're done

How do I maintain the resolve to cut off a great but unhealthy friendship? [more inside]
posted by R a c h e l on Oct 26, 2014 - 15 answers

what shall i do with the ex i work with in the same office 3 feet away?

my ex and i have been working together for 3 or 4 years, and we dated for 1.5 year. he broke up with me a year ago. the post break up year is full of drama. i couldn't let go. the chemistry we had was awesome, and before we dated we used to be the best friends at work. sex is mind blowing good too. at the spot when we broke up we were pretty seriously. neither of us could actually move on given the fact we still see each other everyday. the reason why neither of us has left the company yet is because both of us got some tremendous opportunity or reward for our hard working in the past years for this company. i can't give it up for this break up. so i stuck to it for a year. [more inside]
posted by Freyaaaa on Oct 21, 2014 - 24 answers

Sleep medicine and ADD medicine

What is the best prescription sleep medicine for someone using Adderall to treat ADD? I will be speaking to my doctor of course, but I wanted to see if anybody had a sleep medication that worked well with your ADD medicine. Anecdotal help welcome.
posted by anonymous on Sep 30, 2014 - 17 answers

When/do I tell my ex about my new partner?

Earlier this year, my partner of 4 years and I broke up amicably. I'm seeing someone new. Ex and I both frequent some of the same territories in my city. Should I pre-emptively tell him about the new guy so that he doesn't find out from the grapevine, or seeing us out together? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on Sep 15, 2014 - 29 answers

End it now?

Been dating someone for a bit. I am not sure about the sexual chemistry and connection, but was willing to see where it went until...she told me she is talking to her ex and doesn't know if it will become something again. Finally, taking an important test in a month or two and can't have drama. Do I break it off now to avoid messiness? [more inside]
posted by pando11 on Sep 9, 2014 - 21 answers

Is it normal to miss an ex after 2 years?

I've noticed every so often (every few months?) i start thinking about my ex boyfriend i dated 2 years ago. Should i do anything about this? [more inside]
posted by earthquakeglue on Aug 25, 2014 - 17 answers

How to get over someone who left you for someone else?

How I get over my ex who left me for someone else? [more inside]
posted by Parh6512 on Aug 12, 2014 - 17 answers

Break-up apps that keep you from looking at exes on Facebook/Instagram?

Does anyone know of an app (or apps) that block you from looking at a particular Facebook page, or a particular Instagram feed? I've heard of Break-up Apps that recently have come about where you can 'erase' someone's photos, tags, etc. from your Facebook, as if they were never there, and I also know of chrome extensions which block you from a site altogether, but I can't find a good app that blocks only a particular PAGE on the site (i.e. www.facebook.com/ex'susername). I would like to be able to continue being 'Facebook Friends' with an ex, as not doing so will be disruptive. I also need to use Facebook for my job. I've already blocked them from appearing on my newsfeed and in chat, but I can't seem to stop myself from, fairly regularly, checking their Facebook page, or their Instagram feed. Any good solutions you've seen online? If not, I may have to team up with a programmer to create one because I think it'd be a very useful service! I sure could use it ASAP.
posted by anonymous on Aug 2, 2014 - 4 answers

You can't be friends with your abuser.

Help me accept that I can't be friends with my ex-boyfriend. The relationship was abusive but we've had to maintain contact while we disentangled our lives and I got on my feet. Now that time is over and I have to move on. I am finding it very hard. How can I start moving on towards my future? [more inside]
posted by misspony on Jul 15, 2014 - 19 answers

I should go to the wedding. Or should I?

Two lovely friends of mine are getting married. A number of people I know are also invited, none of whom are close friends. Unfortunately, my terrible, horrible, no-good, very-bad ex - the one who did this to me - is invited too. Help? [more inside]
posted by sevensnowflakes on Jul 14, 2014 - 35 answers

To be there, or not to be there?

Ex wants to pick up room full of stuff this Saturday. I don't want to be there. Is that cool? [more inside]
posted by Classic Diner on Jun 17, 2014 - 22 answers

suicidal ex speaks incoherently, needlessly names me- do I warn his dad?

My suicidal ex bumped into A, an acquaintance of mine, a few days ago and, according to A who later contacted me to warn me about it, he talked strangely, incoherently, in an evidently sick way and mentioned my complete name several times for no apparent reason. As when I last heard him (to tell him to stop calling me), three weeks before this, he seemed to be in a fairly good mental state, I am now debating calling his family to let them know about it. Should I do it or would it be out of place and maybe even open up a can of worms I've barely managed to close? [more inside]
posted by opalshards on May 12, 2014 - 23 answers

19 = bad life decisions

Should I get back together with a cheater? [more inside]
posted by anonymous on May 10, 2014 - 27 answers

3 year pseudo relationship with ex AFTER breakup. Does he love me?

I met my ex online 4 years ago. We hit it off and started dating shortly after. A mutual breakup occurred about 8 months later due to some arguments we had. He was in love with me during our relationship, but I did not fall in love with him until after we broke up. A couple months after we broke up, we made the brilliant decision that I should become his new roomie. During our time living together we had sex on a regular (weekly+) basis. I dated a bit, but nothing serious. He did not date. We ended up living together, along with his brother, for 2 years. During this time we hung out most days. I moved out about a year ago, but he insisted that I keep the key to his house. We still hang out about once a week and have sex nearly as often. The sex tends to be pretty intense and I know that definitely complicates things. He never expects the sex; he is perfectly fine with me going over just to watch a movie and then leaving. Recently he has been cuddly in bed and that is something new. I usually sleep over after we haven't sex. He still hasn't dated since our breakup 3 years ago. [more inside]
posted by GrapCrap on Apr 7, 2014 - 29 answers

Does she (really) love me?

Accidentally went through my girlfriends email and read what I was not supposed to read. [more inside]
posted by Parh6512 on Apr 4, 2014 - 43 answers

How to tackle the awkwardness of bumping into an ex?

Help me deal with the awkwardness of seeing my ex probably tomorrow. [more inside]
posted by Attozes on Mar 24, 2014 - 16 answers

"Is this thing I agreed to a date? And if so, can it not be?"

How do I maintain a platonic relationship with my ex when I'm not sure whether he's on that same page? [more inside]
posted by dekathelon on Mar 7, 2014 - 27 answers

Is it ever a good idea to date your ex?

How do you know if it's a good idea to date your ex? Is it just NEVER a good idea, as is the commonly accepted wisdom? Or can it work out sometimes? Should I give it another go? [more inside]
posted by quincunx on Jan 19, 2014 - 19 answers

Does this relationship worth continuing?

I have known this girl for about 8 months. She has put a lot of pressure on me to meet her parents and wants to see my parents as well. In the beginning of our relationship she told me that she was done with dating and the last person she wants to be intimate with should ideally be her husband. She said that she dated two other people in the past and I am the third one. Since she was 30 years old and her number was too low to me, I asked her if she met other people in between her serious relationships and she said yes but she claimed she was not intimate with them. Anyways I did not care about her number as long as she was honest with me. [more inside]
posted by mbn1455 on Dec 20, 2013 - 41 answers

Too close for comfort . . .

I've searched previous threads regarding appropriate relationships with exes, but I'm still a little confused with my situation. Would really appreciate some feedback from both the male and female perspective. [more inside]
posted by canda on Dec 19, 2013 - 24 answers

the one left behind

I've been seeing a lot of stories from people who left their relationships so that they can go on to be better versions of themselves, because they felt their ex held them back. Is there anything from the perspective of the ex that got left behind? [more inside]
posted by divabat on Dec 3, 2013 - 40 answers

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