13880 Ask MetaFilter answers by jessamyn (displaying 1 through 50)

What are your favorite hacks for beating anxious procrastination? How do you delay gratification, in favor of getting things done? I'm looking for anecdata and personal testimony about techniques you use; not so much app recommendations.
comment posted at 12:50 PM on May-28-16

I have very poor boundaries, and I'm just beginning to understand what that means. I've been trying to be aware of that and then set them in my relationship with my husband - but I'm unsure I'm doing it right, and am not just ending up being controlling.
comment posted at 4:03 PM on May-27-16

Someone I know keeps complaining about how my room has a 'gross smell' even though I wash regularly, don't let food rot away in my room, empty the garbage from my room quite regularly, vacuum at least once every 1.5 weeks and, to my knowledge, don't do anything that would be the cause of things smelling like shit. Regardless, I'd like to take steps to keep my room smelling fresh.
comment posted at 1:18 PM on May-27-16
comment posted at 2:35 PM on May-27-16

My Twitter account wanted a phone number to verify a new account, and when I entered it it told me "unsupported phone number". Also, the drop-down menu pops back to Canada when I've selected United States. Please hope me!
comment posted at 11:07 AM on May-27-16
comment posted at 11:12 AM on May-27-16

I need some help brainstorming. Looking on Ancestry.com, I have found two draft cards (well, one draft card and one draft registration card) that are definitely the same person, but the birth year is off by four years. It doesn't seem to me to be an issue of skirting an age limit on either end. Ideas?
comment posted at 8:49 AM on May-27-16

I will be attending a wedding as a guest next weekend. My options for a suit are: dark grey, light grey, and a lighter navy. I'm interested in buying a new shirt and tie combo for the occasion, but I'm looking for some options. I'd like something that's bright and fun, but doesn't clash (which I often have a hard time discerning).
comment posted at 10:04 AM on May-27-16

I suck at correspondence, and would like to pay another human to draft the occasional very brief email message for me-- standard thank-yous, requests, friend check-ins, etc. (I don't need a full-on virtual assistant; just the occasional $5, 5-minute task). Is there an established gig website that handles this sort of custom short content request? How else could I go about tracking down someone to provide this service?
comment posted at 8:19 AM on May-27-16

I'm curious if there's any information about people who have trouble with creating something wholly new but instead seems much better at modifying or creating by assembling parts of things they already know.
comment posted at 8:29 AM on May-27-16

A relative suffered a brain injury and stroke. We want to learn everything there is to know about assessment and treatment of speech and cognition problems after severe brain injury. Researching this, it has been hard to cut through the morass of questionable information coming from companies pushing a product or service. I'd like to get the information that doctors/pathologists/therapists get in their training. Things like textbooks, manuals, class notes, clinical guides, peer-reviewed articles, etc. are great. Free and on the internet is best, but not necessary. Thank you.
comment posted at 7:49 PM on May-26-16

It's been a long frustrating 18 months going through divorce. In trial my lawyer and I tried to get the house, but were unsuccessful. So, Asshat gets the house in the decree and I get a cash settlement.
comment posted at 7:28 PM on May-25-16

My 5 year old broke his arm yesterday. We are getting excellent health care. I'm looking for advice on how to cope with the next 4-6 weeks he's in a cast.
comment posted at 6:00 PM on May-25-16

I need the equivalent of plastic couch covers or tinfoiling your stove for counters. I'd like to use the counters with the covers on. Appearance is unimportant. Usability of the counters is.
comment posted at 4:45 PM on May-25-16

The American public will be inundated with national poll results until November 8th, and I can't understand why.
comment posted at 11:34 AM on May-25-16

I am going to Boston this weekend. I have been there a billion times but have never really done any Bostony things. What should I plan to do? Things I like: seafood, New Englandyness, American history, public transportation, and roast beef but I think I've got that covered.
comment posted at 7:16 AM on May-25-16

OK. We have an RV on loan for a week's vacation in the first week in August (we can fudge where the week begins and ends). We have a six year old. We have at least one parent, probably two, nostalgic for New Hampshire in high summer.
comment posted at 7:21 AM on May-25-16

I'm a Canadian doing a large scale home renovation. I know Japanese-style toilets, and German-style tilt and turn windows, and they're amazing. But what else am I missing? Can you recommend any other game-changing home innovations from around the world that aren't common in Toronto, Canada?
comment posted at 7:35 AM on May-24-16

I have a bunch of boxes of books and other paper ephemera to store. I'll store all I can inside the house, but some, surely, will have to go in the garage--good roof, but not climate controlled, and door is drafty. Hot and humid in summer and cold and dry in winter. How to make the best of it?
comment posted at 7:39 AM on May-23-16

What characterizes someone for whom closure is anathema? Or at least, feels no drive toward closure, and is perfectly OK with broken, messy, unresolved relationships? (Not just romantic or interpersonal ones... but those are what matter most IMO.)
comment posted at 7:50 AM on May-23-16

This has happened to me off and on for a couple of years, and I've never resolved it. Sometimes, on my Macbook, using both Chrome and Safari, I'll try to do a Google search by typing my search directly into the address bar (my usual way of doing things), and when I press enter, I get this screen (Chrome), or I get redirected to a totally unrelated website - usually LinkedIn like just now, but I think I've been redirected to Facebook in the past. This always resolves on it's own after no longer than a day. I don't have the same problem on mobile, on the same wifi network. I can't seem to find anything about it with a Google search (or maybe I'm not using the ideal search terms?). Anyone know what causes this and how I can fix it?
comment posted at 3:22 PM on May-22-16

No, seriously. I keep on rereading the first two-thirds of Neal Stephenson's Seveneves, and I gotta get out of this place. Please make me aware of other things I should read.
comment posted at 2:10 PM on May-22-16

*NOT ASKING FOR HOW TO DOWNLOAD ILLEGALLY* Where do I go to buy academic books (monographs in anthropology, comp lit, and so forth) as PDFs? I can't imagine this isn't already a thing-- fill me in on that missed memo!
comment posted at 12:56 PM on May-22-16

So, there's someone who has been a real absolutely mean apathetic narcissistic jerk of all jerks with my husband and me (mostly, me). It is a close relative. We can't ignore them (too close), we can't avoid them, and when they visit they take over our lives for a couple of months every few years (2-3? if we're lucky). I have never hated anyone as much. How do I not let it influence me?
comment posted at 12:50 PM on May-22-16

My husband and I are visiting Montreal and we've never seen so many white people with dreadlocks in one place. What's up with this?
comment posted at 12:14 PM on May-22-16

My Mom is in the hospital for Acute Myeloid Leukemia (AML). She's had an infection for the past few days and isn't doing well - she's not critical or anything, but she's not looking/feeling great and doesn't want anyone to see her in this state. I - plus some other close family members - REALLY want to visit her, especially considering her condition could change quickly - but we are worried she will get upset. What to do?
comment posted at 8:02 AM on May-22-16

Because Reasons, I suddenly will be receiving $450K from a family inheritence. I'm in California. I have, like, a normal-sized bank account like normal people who don't usually receive $450K suddenly. I am going to have to find a financial planner who can advise me how to deal with this money long-term, but where am I going to put it, like, next week when they want to give this to me?
comment posted at 7:42 AM on May-22-16

Where is the best place to find out whether 1P-LSD is legal in Romania? I am considering shipping it here but I want to know whether I should expect any trouble from the authorities.
comment posted at 11:20 AM on May-21-16

I'll be in Denver in mid-July and thinking of taking a weekend trip out of the city. Looking for a relaxing place to stay. Snowflake details inside.
comment posted at 9:13 AM on May-20-16
comment posted at 11:18 AM on May-25-16

I need to mail (via USPS) a manila envelope to someone important in lower Manhattan. And I need to know for sure when it will arrive, so I can email him same-day notice of its imminent arrival, so he watches for it and it doesn't sink into a pile of other mailings. If I drop it at a post office in his zip code (10007) the previous afternoon, am I assured he'll get it the next day? Is there any other way (without making it look like I'm trying too hard) to be sure of delivery date? I'm not in a rush....I just need to know for sure.
comment posted at 7:04 AM on May-18-16

Where to start with Buddhism?
comment posted at 4:15 PM on May-17-16

You are not my lawyer. But I want to know if this is possible, and should I find a lawyer? It involves a divorce and taxes in New Jersey.
comment posted at 10:24 AM on May-17-16

My workplace is in the process of converting all of the single-occupancy restrooms into gender neutral bathrooms. My questions is, why were they segregated by gender in the first place?
comment posted at 11:17 AM on May-17-16

I need a mechanical (not digital or on my phone) timer that makes a ticking sound. I'd rather it not be a hugely loud harsh ticking sound but if it meets the other needs, I'll take it. I also need it to be pretty sturdy. And I need the damn thing to go off when it gets to zero. I've tried a bunch from kitchen stores lately and they only go off about 20% of the time. Bonus points if the dial is easy to see from across the room.
comment posted at 7:52 AM on May-17-16

I'll be in New England in October and would like to get out in the natural world. Help me decide where to go and how to get there!
comment posted at 9:16 AM on May-16-16

BF and I are going to tie the knot in a civil ceremony later this year with just our parents and siblings (one each) in attendance, but we'd still like to give everyone a traditional wedding-ish experience. However, I'm finding it hard to search for wedding planning advice/inspiration, as apparently anything less than 50 or so guests is a "small" and "intimate" wedding! Where can I find information on how to throw a wedding for less than ten people?
comment posted at 9:51 AM on May-14-16

My Ex has just dropped a bit of a bombshell and I need advice on how to minimise any impact on my 12yo daughter.
comment posted at 9:37 AM on May-14-16

I am producing a TEDx event and am asking some of the speakers to bring along their books to sign and sell. What is the average retailers % of list price?
comment posted at 12:25 PM on May-13-16

I see on AskMe all the time, whenever someone refers to an adult of the female gender as a "girl," several people will immediately pop up to sternly correct them. I've come to accept this as part of the site culture here, and keep it in mind for my own questions and comments, but it quite honestly seems bizarre based on my own life experience. I'm curious how common this view actually is, and whether people actually stick to it in real life.
comment posted at 7:36 PM on May-12-16
comment posted at 6:15 PM on May-23-16

At our last session my therapist alluded to God in an entirely benign way but it still leaves me wondering whether I -- as an irreligious gay man -- should start shopping elsewhere.
comment posted at 11:42 AM on May-11-16

If you're a woman who does not present in a traditionally/stereotypically feminine way, are you uncomfortable being described as "pretty" or "beautiful"?
comment posted at 11:49 AM on May-11-16

My boyfriend didn't say happy birthday to me, which I'm convincing myself is not that big of a deal, but I don't know why it's annoying me so much. More details inside.
comment posted at 7:49 AM on May-11-16
comment posted at 8:03 AM on May-11-16

I have written a book which I would like to self-pub as an ebook. But I don't necessarily want to sell it.
comment posted at 4:06 PM on May-10-16

We're segueing out of our hard-livin' days, and are finding it difficult to think of ways to be out and about, around other people, that don't involve drinking or eating. Where do you go to get your socializing fix?
comment posted at 2:36 PM on May-10-16

Is shaving your legs as difficult and time-consuming for everyone else as it is for me? I'm asking because I'm curious to understand other peoples' experiences relative to mine.
comment posted at 1:25 PM on May-10-16

There's a voice stuck in my head. It's a male singer, blues and folk, about the same timbre as Leonard Cohen but smoother, with a mournful sound and very slight rasp on the higher notes. Who is he?
comment posted at 10:26 AM on May-10-16

I've had a few incidents of strange occurrences that all deal with my head and maybe my brain: vertigo, headaches, etc. My primary doctor says the fact that the symptoms are so far apart and aren't getting worse suggests they are isolated benign things. But I'm concerned. I asked for a referral for a neurologist and he said he would give me one if it happened again/got worse. I'm wondering if I should just tell tell him it happened again so I can get that referral? Or should I not worry?
comment posted at 12:17 PM on May-9-16

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