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My son has a classmate who may be facing eviction. He is in kindergarten. I would like to help. But if I'm wrong, still have the gesture be a nice thing that was done randomly. What would you do? [more inside]
posted by ichimunki at 5:31 PM - 12 answers

Our (very part time) family assistant is graduating from college next month. While she's worked for us for ~1.5 years, we didn't know her very well on a personal level. Normally cash would be the natural solution, but that feels weird when we already pay her directly. Other ideas? [more inside]
posted by matildatakesovertheworld at 1:36 PM - 11 answers

Our mother passed away and we are putting together a casual memorial in a local arboretum. We want it to be as successful (people sharing memories) as possible, but we children are all introverts and feel like we don't know how best to do/encourage that. Help. [more inside]
posted by blueberry at 3:48 PM - 12 answers

Sourcing the hive mind for a way out of this mess that I've made for myself. In summary - I've been in a situationship for 6 years now. Meaning sex (though rarely these days due to antidepressants and general lack of attraction on my end), cuddles, picking each other up from the airport, hanging out almost every day, and saying I love you. At times I've deluded myself into thinking this is a partnership despite the lack of labels, but last week I identified myself as his partner when speaking with him and he said "no, not really". This is not what I envisioned for my life - it's humiliating to not be chosen as his girlfriend. It’s humiliating to not have met his parents. And I’ve hidden it from my family this entire time - if anything, they think we were good friends that dated briefly. I very much want to get married or at least have a long term committed relationship. I also feel uncomfortable and unhappy around him a lot of the time. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:44 PM - 19 answers

I'm helping an older family member move and would like to get a gift for their neighbor. The family member has some health problems and over the past few years has had trouble maintaining their current house. The neighbor has done a lot of maintenance and yard work for my family member, and has always refused to accept any payment for this. [more inside]
posted by scorpion proof at 8:02 AM - 5 answers

Tonight, our daughter's closeted girlfriend was supposed to come over to hang out, but her mom apparently said no and said that she has to study. It's a Friday night. This isn't the first time she hasn't been allowed to come over. Our daughter is welcome at their house. I'm wondering if the parents suspect that something is going on? What do you all think? This is our first experience supporting our daughter through a more serious relationship. [more inside]
posted by percor at 5:51 PM - 11 answers

A coworker has accidentally revealed a disruptive company secret to other staff; I was aware of the secret and am now being asked if I knew of it, how to respond? Multiple timezones & work cultures involved. [more inside]
posted by aramaic at 12:15 PM - 25 answers

My sister wants my mom to come live with her due to her Alzheimer's; I am asking for a little time to find out what our options are re: assisted living. Is that a big ask? [more inside]
posted by Kitteh at 1:24 PM - 30 answers

I work part-time as a cashier and lifeguard at a swimming pool. When I was cashiering last week, a woman in her 60's came to me to complain that while she was water walking, she was getting splashed due to the ardent lap swimming of the person in the lane next to her. [more inside]
posted by SageTrail at 7:57 AM - 47 answers

My MIL is a textbook narcissistic abuser and after her last verbal attack, the hubby and I decided we don't want her in our lives anymore. Fast forward to this morning, where the MIL's friend decided to take exception and say the wrong thing. It's gotten under my skin and I'm about to explode saying something, but I know it probably wouldn't be wise. [more inside]
posted by chatelaine at 1:19 PM - 40 answers

Hello mefites. I need help understanding why I am not ok being the breadwinner when my salary definitely supports it. I am in a helping people profession that happens to have a very high salary (think doctor, but I am not a doctor). My spouse has a PhD in humanities and teaches two or three classes per term as an adjunct. His pay is abysmal, like $12 an hour when you account for all the grading, student meetings, etc. He probably works 25-30 hours per week, plus commute. We were in these professions when we met and fell in love, late 30s. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:02 AM - 69 answers

How do I engage with them while they are going through this? And do I mention anything to anyone else about it? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:00 AM - 9 answers

My employer has a periodic off-site for executives and investors. Many of them seem to be "performing status" by wearing the latest trends & Rolexes, and talking about the Hamptons and Europe travel. I listen and also talk about my own hobbies, which works fine for conversation with all my colleagues except one guy. He gets visibly offended. How can I make smalltalk with him without leading to friction? [more inside]
posted by cheesecake at 6:37 AM - 38 answers

After an extended period of burnout, my boyfriend just started a new job that he loves. Turns out, what was described as "some travel to begin with" has turned into him flying overseas Mon-Fri, every week for an unknown period of time. It could be two months or it could be a year. I feel a bit blindsided by this, please help me figure out how to cope. [more inside]
posted by guessthis at 4:56 AM - 16 answers

A relative has willed her estate to only me. I have siblings, and am trying to figure out whether and how to share the money with them. Can you help me think through this? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:28 AM - 40 answers

Wondering how to prevent someone else's from becoming yours when you're taking care of ALL of their stuff (out of necessity). [more inside]
posted by Eyelash at 5:27 PM - 8 answers

My spouse, AMAB, has been figuring out their gender and sexuality for a while. They recently told me that they wanted to switch to they/them pronouns, which I am supportive of! I was a little surprised, but not shocked, and I am happy for them that they are feeling comfortable figuring things out! What's surprising my is my reaction to it. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:17 PM - 14 answers

If you saw someone wearing a pendant similar to this, would you assume they were religious? (This is not the item in question, but the shape of the bird is the same.)
posted by HotToddy at 8:44 AM - 69 answers

My wife and I recently moved to a new area, and my wife made friends with a co-worker (A). We started hanging out with A and her wife (B) and were initially excited to have met another 30s lesbian couple in our new neighborhood. I noticed that sometimes B would say things about her wife, A, that I would not say about my wife and that I would not be okay with my wife saying about me. She would comment on what A chose to eat, she dissed her more than she complimented her, and didn't seem that fond of A, but I thought it might just be their schtick. [more inside]
posted by spacebologna at 11:58 AM - 17 answers

Feeling helpless as I watch my loved ones feel helpless. I want to respect autonomy but I also am really unsure if this is a moment to step in and push them to get help. CW for mental health and substance issues. [more inside]
posted by buttonedup at 11:39 AM - 9 answers