Do I intervene with the bullies?
August 3, 2008 1:21 PM Subscribe
My son may be gay. I don't think he even knows yet. He is 15 this month-entering high school. He is ADHD, funny, cute, great with kids, thoughtful, and very loud and effeminate. He's jumped into the theater/choir crowd at school (Big group- I LOVE these kids and their families!). My question is- Can or should a mom get involved with the bullying that goes on?
posted by anonymous to human relations (41 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
I worry that I don't parent this child well. He is pretty obnoxious and acts inappropriately often. For instance, he's loud when he shouldn't be, acts flamboyantly when the situation calls for acting demurely. I'm telling you this first, so you will know that oftentimes, he sets himself up for trouble.
I want to support him regarding his sexual orientation, but I'm not sure how to do it. We live in the middle of the Bible Belt, and most teens that I know are gay don't come out openly.I think they know their life would be too hard.
The bullying never stops for my son. He is picked on endlessly-online, in person, in school.
He finally said to me that people were going to pick on him no matter what he does, so he's going to do what he wants.
I find myself telling him to settle down all the time. For instance, he wants to wear certain clothes. I tell him that the ribbing will get worse if he wears this or that. Should I be doing that?
For you adult gays out there, (this is only for the ones that are effeminate in nature), what do you wish your parents would have done to make your life easier? His life outside the home is sometimes a living hell and I don't know the best way to help him.
I am of the school of thought that I can't do anything about his sexual orientation, so I'm not trying to change him. I just want his high school career to go a little smoother than middle school did.