Why did stretching make me so horny?

July 2, 2008 11:42 AM

What the hell just happened to me while I was stretching my back?

My lower back was feeling tight, so I leaned back in my chair and did a big, long and deep stretch with my arms over my head. Suddenly, just as I'm feeling the muscles stretching out, my midsection becomes filled with this burning sensation that quickly fades to warmth, spreading out from my back around to my stomach and into my groin and bowels (I also felt my bowels loosen slightly). As I sat up, I became a bit lightheaded, a bit breathless and immediately developed a serious erection and became intensely aroused, all the while, my body is tingling (in a VERY pleasant way). After it passed, I repeated the stretch again to the same effect. Within 60 seconds, I feel perfectly normal again.

What the hell happened? Did I discover a super horny button or am I having a stroke?

posted by Cat Pie Hurts to health (17 comments total)

Some yoga practitioners might come in and say that you've awakened Kundalini. I don't know that from Adam, but if you feel fine then roll with it.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:50 AM on July 2

i think you just exorcised an engram.
a horny engram.
posted by Silky Slim at 11:51 AM on July 2 [1 favorite]

Also, if you can lift both arms, smile correctly, and speak this sentence out loud then you didn't have a stroke.
posted by Burhanistan at 11:51 AM on July 2

Dunno, but it happens to me too every now and then.

Stretching back like that probably stretches the blood vessels--especially the big important ones--thereby causing them to narrow (like rubber surgical tubing), which in turn causes the rest of your body to go all wacky. Like squeezing a balloon in the middle makes the bits at either end swell more. The erection could maybe act as a sort of relief valve so some little blood vessel somewhere else doesn't burst. Maybe. Just a speculation.

Also, technically, if you were leaning back, you were stretching your front.
posted by Sys Rq at 12:12 PM on July 2

...causes the blood pressure in the rest of your body...
posted by Sys Rq at 12:13 PM on July 2

Like squeezing a balloon in the middle makes the bits at either end swell more. The erection could maybe act as a sort of relief valve so some little blood vessel somewhere else doesn't burst. Maybe. Just a speculation.

I'm not a cardiologist, but I don't think that the penis and arteries have that kind of relationship.
posted by Burhanistan at 12:20 PM on July 2

Erm... I was suggesting that the body is like a balloon, not the penis.

On second thought, I suspect what is happening is more like the entire lower part of the body acting a bit like an erection, in that some blood-hose somewhere is kinked, letting blood in but not out, causing pressure to mount down there while lessening up in the head.

(But AskMe is not built for wild speculations, so I'll just shut up now.)
posted by Sys Rq at 12:42 PM on July 2

Okay, so how many of us tried doing this after we read the question? Fess up.
posted by loiseau at 1:13 PM on July 2 [2 favorites]

I am not a doctor, (yet) but you may have tweaked your lower spinal nerves. Erections require parasympathetic output from s2-s4, as is anal tone. (The lovely mnemonic for parasympathetic = erection, sympathetic = ejaculation is Point and Shoot.)

Maybe you tweaked something in your sympathetic chain, and your brainstem responded by letting the parasympathetics loose.

I wouldn't worry about it unless your legs go weak, you can't feel them, or there's pain there. Also, if you have problems keeping poo in or letting piss out, go to emerg.

You might have a bit of arthritis in the back which is narrowing the outlets for spinal nerves, or maybe you've just managed to twinge them just right, like hitting your funny bone, but deeper. Put it down to one of those quirks of the human body.
posted by Basalisk at 1:52 PM on July 2

But AskMe is not built for wild speculations...

I think when Cat Pie Hurts asks about the "science" behind his magic horny stretch wild speculation is pretty much fair game.
posted by nanojath at 1:52 PM on July 2 [1 favorite]

Yeah, lower spinal nerves. I saw this science show years ago where a doctor accidentally induced an orgasm in his female patient when he was sticking a needle into her spine for some reason. So he began a series of experiments and figured out where the control/link was, somewhere in the lower back portion of the spine. I never followed up on it or heard anything else about it, but it would be handy if it could be harnessed as a consumer product. Honestly, in today's fast paced world, who really has time to masturbate? Just give me a remote because I HAVE THINGS TO DO!
posted by Askr at 3:09 PM on July 2 [4 favorites]

Seriously - if that's a symptom of a stroke, please sign me up.
posted by VioletU at 3:29 PM on July 2

@Askr: here's your sex machine
posted by minus zero at 5:13 PM on July 2

I know, like, nothing about male anatomy, but there's a spot inside your lower colon - the prostate, I think? - that can induce orgasm in males if touched properly. (Hence butt toys?)

My guess would be that in leaning back you put pressure on that.
posted by GardenGal at 6:25 PM on July 2

Wow - nothing like this has ever happened to me, while stretching my back or otherwise.

Okay, so how many of us tried doing this after we read the question? Fess up.

I have done several much less dignified things today to achieve orgasm. I don't think we need to bother with a general call for confessions to the same. We all know who we are. I would like to know, however, what the OP did with the fantastic erection this all induced? Really, the last thing I need in my day is ONE MORE OF THOSE to find an outlet for.

Which is to say yes, I tried it.
posted by scarabic at 12:00 AM on July 3

but it only lasted 60 seconds, what can you do?
posted by Wilder at 5:20 AM on July 3

but it only lasted 60 seconds, what can you do?
posted by Wilder at 8:20 AM on July 3 [+] [!]

HAHAHAhahaha......!
posted by lyam at 12:19 PM on July 3