Drama-free networking: how?

April 22, 2008 9:28 AM

Looking for advice and strategies from experienced business networkers (or schmoozers, for lack of a better word.)

My husband and I run a pretty successful company in an industry based largely on interpersonal relationships and referrals. Our success thus far has been built on things like providing great service, earning various honors, being a good source of industry-related information for media contacts, etc. (Basically, for doing good work as opposed to just being a good schmoozer.)

Our next frontier is for my husband, who’s the face of our company, to do more networking, so that more business can be referred to us. We’re members of several industry groups, so there are a lot of opportunities for him to get involved with other people. The challenge is that he’s trying to break into a fairly tight-knit group of people who spend a lot of time doing this whole networking thing, in an industry that tends to breed a lot of gossip and pettiness. On the whole, people tend to be way more interested in what others are doing than in most industries, I’d guess.

For what it’s worth, our company has a pretty impeccable reputation and we have absolutely no reason not to be completely proud of our business practices and ethics. However, there are a lot of “haters” out there, specifically competitors whom we (once upon a time) worked with or for, who’ve had ample time to put down our company and our accomplishments to whoever would listen. There also seems to be some general resentment among direct competitors that our company, which is only a few years old, is doing really well. This results in some pretty creative story-spinning on their part, and it would seem that many people are all too happy to listen.

I’m hoping to get some suggestions on ways to effectively and professionally network with other businesses, while not being bogged down by competitors’ negativity toward us. We’d like to be able to quickly shut down these people’s efforts to slam us (as opposed to just pretending it isn’t happening) but without getting involved in a lot of petty drama.

In case it affects your response, confidence and ability to “work a room” isn’t really the issue; we’re more concerned with how to get a fresh start in a networking group that may have already been influenced by the words and actions of our competitors. Also, we definitely do want to network and feel it’s important, so responses that networking isn’t a good business tool probably won’t be that helpful – it really is a huge part of the industry we’re in. Thanks so much!

posted by justonegirl to work & money (4 comments total)

Your good work and lack of petty shit-talking will speak for itself. No one wants to work with the people who badmouth the people they've worked with.
posted by sondrialiac at 10:25 AM on April 22, 2008

sondrialiac has it right - your existing reputation far outweighs negative talk, gossip and backbiting.

However, I was wondering what industry you're in, who you clients are (size, sector), how big your community is, where your community is.

For example, the world of HR consulting for small companies can be pretty petty. Contract marketing/communications can be the same.

I think it's because there are few barriers to entry in those particular markets, and very little to differentiate between companies. Therefore, interpersonal politics play a role in who gets what contracts.

In smaller communities (I live and work in a government town of about 250,000 on an Island with a total population of about 600,000, about 20 minutes by plane from a city of about 2.5 million located far from anywhere) petty politics can also play a huge role, because the market is so small.

That's why most marketing communications companies here (once again, I don't know your industry) focus on selling outside of the community. They typically focus on building websites for larger customers (that's where the money is) along with the marketing communications side - you can do that anywhere.

So why not prospect in a different part of the world?
posted by KokuRyu at 11:14 AM on April 22, 2008

Guy Kawasaki recently published a good "The Art of Schmoozing" article, and for me the takeaway is his first point - Discover what you can do for someone else.

What can you do for these negative talkers? Well, maybe they would like to learn more about how you did get so successful so quickly - maybe your husband could do a talk on that. Or how you earned those honors.

If there's some practical information you can pass onto your industry, that will go a long way to shutting down the haters.
posted by extrabox at 7:12 PM on April 22, 2008 [1 favorite has favorites]

First, JustOneGirl, let me say your blog is great! I am in non-profit fundraising and I know the task of network better than most.

I would suggest that instead of simply networking that your husband create an event in support of a charity you both support and then invite clients and local businesses to join in. You can get a speaker from the charity who can solicit donations, but you can also highlight how your husband's company is one that is also doing good work away from work. Inviting backbiters might be a good way to expose their pettiness to a wider audience and win fans for the different kind of business your husband runs. Good luck!
posted by parmanparman at 8:06 PM on April 22, 2008